Javea jeard nov 2013

The News/views Magazine ABOUT and FOR Jávea - you can hold in your hand Nº 7 November 2013

Maximising your Pensioncould cost you your home

Avda. del Pla/Calle Pescara, 5 - JAVEA 03730Tel: 96 646 1848 www.overseas.es Store opening hours: Monday - Saturday, 8:30am - 9:00pm

Offers valid in Jávea and Benissa stores, until 11th November, 2013

Suggested

1€Donation

Jávea Jeard knows thename of the ‘victim’ and thehouse they bought in AdsubiaCapsades, but there has beenno reply to our request for‘chapter and verse’.

What we did receivethough, as friends - notknowing we might have aneditorial interest - was anintroduction to Angela Brookswho is visiting Jávea at thebeginning of November, totalk with, and instruct, a localspecialist lawyer who is usedby many British residents.

‘Angie’ refers to themisery and destruction causedby silver-tongued financialadvisers who continue topeddle unauthorised, high riskinvestments.

She told us: "Whencontemplating making achange to your pension orinvestments, there are threethings you must do:homework; homework;homework. Unfortunately,not all financial advisers arethe same: some are honest,honourable and professionallyethical - genuinely puttingyour financial interests beforetheir own. However, someare not.

“If a financial adviseroffers you something thatsounds too good to be true, itprobably is. So don't just takehis word - do your own

homework. If you are offereda "tax-free", regulated,compliant cash lump sumbelow the age of 55, run likehell. If you are offeredextraordinarily high returns,remember the other side ofthe coin: high risk. Ask lotsof questions: Is the adviserregulated? Is the schemeregulated? Is a transfer fullyHMRC compliant? But,perhaps most important of all:does the adviser have robustprofessional indemnityinsurance?

“There are financialadvisers in the Jávea area whohave been peddling dodgyinvestment and pensionschemes - as well as pensionliberation scams - for at leastfour years. There are otherswho won't touch them with abarge pole. Unfortunately,there have been numerousvictims of the former categorywho have not only lost theirpensions or investments toschemes which have beendeemed to be fraud by theHigh Court in the UK, and arefacing huge tax liabilities, butalso have discovered that thetrust they placed in theirfinancial advisers has resultedin their money being frozen inilliquid schemes deemed to beunrecoverable and toxic.

“Just remember, enticingshort-term gains can generate

If anyexplanation

is stillneeded

We could have calledthis local magazineHAVVYER HEARD,but we thought JáveaJeard would confirmour light-heartedattitude to the seriouspolitical and economicproblems in Spain, andtheir effect on Jávea.

Newspapers and the internet are flooded with offers to “access your UKcompany pension” with the promise of “specialist advisers” but one Adsubiaproperty owner who believed what she read, finds herself in expensivelitigation and the risk of losing her Jávea property.

expensive and devastatinglong-term disasters. Pick yourfinancial adviser as carefullyas you would pick yourspouse: it is a very intimatelong-term relationship. If youget hitched to one who isn'tright for you, there will be agreat deal of heartache andmisery for years to come.

Continued on page 2

AEverW

November 2013, Nº 7 Jávea Jeard

A2Z Directory of Jávea Address Labels Address List

Management Airport Transfers Alarm SystemsBaby Equipment HireBabygros Beniconnect Airport Bus

Bibs Binding of e-BooksBirthday Cards Boat InsuranceBookmarks Bubble-wrap Business Cards Cake ToppingsCanvas Prints Car Insurance CaravanInsurance Car SeatsCheapa ParcelsChristmas Cards Civil Marriages

for Residents Clocks Coasters Colour PhotocopiesCompliment SlipsCondolence CardsCourier Delivery to Spain Crisis Business

Start-Up Kit Diaries DIY Shredding Service Document AuthenticationEmbroidery

Envelopes Excursions Fax Send and ReceiveFemale Focus Mag.Flyers Framed Canvas PrintsFridge Magnets Funeral (Thanksgiving)

Services Gift Tags

Golden LeavesFuneral Plans

Greeting Cards Health Insurance PlanHelp and Advice House Insurance Illuminated SignboardInk Jet Cartridges Insurance Invitations Jig-saws Key-rings Laminating Legal translationsLetterheads Magazine Printing Memo Pads Menus Mirror Letters Mouse Mats MRW Parcel ServiceNewsletters Oasis Help Centre Paper A4 for PrintersParcel collection Service Passport Photos Perpetua Socorro Photocopies

Printer Cartridges Printed cake Toppings Printing Public Liability InsurancePublishing Questions AnsweredRaffle Tickets Round-Tuit

Funeral Plans

Rubber Stamps Security Shredding

DIY service SEGURITAS AlarmsSignature Witnessing Soft Toys SpeediPost Sticky Labels T-Shirts Teddy Bears TNT ParcelsTranslations TV ChoiceTV Costa magazine UK Mags in Spain UK Mail Service UK Passport Check

Certification and Submission

Vinyl Signs Wedding Blessings Welcome to ParadiseWheelchair Hire Wide Format Printing

We do it allfromA-W

What else do you want us to do?

Wot is were?Advertising rates . 4, 13Agenda 21 . 13, 17 & 18Christmas present campaign 10Comet ISON by Ian Amer 22Cryptic Crossword . 19Duty Chemist Rota . 24Grapevine Congratulations 9Humour . . 7 & 20Jávea Postcodes . 2M.A.B.C. Members . 11Oasis Help Centre Services 2October 9th awards . 23Pastor’s Point of View . 6, 8 & 9Pensions Scam . . 1 & 2Port Library opens . 11Remember those who gave 20Satellite Fact File . 4-5Scallops Vouchers recycling 22Straight Talking by Lee Hodges 14Sunday morning invitation 7Tarick’s our ‘Jolly Swag Man’ 12Town Hall Monthly Meeting 3 & 10Woman to Woman . 16 & 21

Come Strictly Scottish Country DancingMeets on a Wednesday for 2 hours from

3.45pm at LÁncora Tennis Club. Great way to exercise and have fun.

Phone Carole 608 980 252

Jávea Jeard is published in Jávea byA2Z Publicaciones on behalf of IglesiaGrupo International de Divulgación delEvangelio (CIF: Q0300542H) at OASIS Centre, C/. Toni Llido 5, 03730

All Greeting cards 1€

C/. Toni Llido 5 (next to La Caixa) - Jávea Port (Dolphin Roundabout)

Tel/Fax: 96 646 3707 [email protected]

JAVEA POSTCODESMost towns have asingle Postcode:Jávea has 4, butCorreos discouragetheir use, claiming itis better to use03730 (where 50%will be wrong) ratherthan the code foryour area, which‘some’ will get wrong.Adsubia 03739Alborada 03739Arenal 03738Cala Blanca, Urb

03738Cap Martín 03738Capsades 03739Catarroja Partida

03737Cerezos, Los 03739Colomer 03737Costa Nova, Urb

03738Ermita, Urb 03737Eurocondal, Urb.

03737Fontanella 03737Frechinall 03738

Granadella, La 03738

Lluca 03739Mandarina, La 03739Media Luna 03738Montgó 03737MontgóCarrasquetes 03737Montgó Toscamar

03737Panorama, Urb

03738Pinosol 03739Portichol 03738Rebaldi 03739Rimontgó 03737Seniola 03737Tarraulla 03739Tosalet, Urb. 03739Tosals 03737Toscal 03738Trencall 03738Valls 03737Valls Carrasquetes

VA-CA 03737Valls Planets

VA-PN 03737Valls Tosal

VA-TS 03737Everywhere else

03730

Continued from previous page“The good news is that the net is

closing in on the rogue financialadvisers. The Pensions Regulator, theFinancial Conduct Authority, HMRC,Action Fraud, the Spanish and EUregulators are all taking a keen interest inshady practitioners who seek to exploitsupposed loopholes and circumventregulations and laws. There are likely tobe some eye-watering negligence claimsand criminal proceedings against theperpetrators very soon. But in the

meantime, if you are contemplating anychanges to your pensions or investments,tread carefully and do your homework.

Above all, don'trush in where angelsfear to tread."

Angela Brooks, former Director ofthe British Taxpayers Federation andretired tax barrister, can be reached on674746663. CR

Jávea Jeard November 2013, Nº 7

Letyou to the Airport

Alicante or Valencia

25€ per person, per journey, from JÁVEAPick-up/Drop-off points

Aparthotel Pinosol, Saladar, Quicksave Arenal,Consum, Dolphin roundabout, Montgo Rte.

BOOK HERE, at the C/. Toni Llido 5(behind La Caixa bank)

Tel: 96 646 3707or 669 386 702

Jávea Townhall October meeting

Jávea again sets the standardby which others are judged,with the announcement thatall local taxes to be paid asand when is most convenient,with quarterly or monthlypayments by direct debit or incash. Paying in full will earn a4% discount. It was strange tohear the announcement,considering Oscar Anton, theCouncillor for Finance wasnot present and I did not hearany reference to his absence.His father-in-law had suffereda relapse and Oscar had takenhis family to be a support tohis wife’s family.

Mayor Jose Chulvi saidJávea had introduced one ofthe most flexible payments inSpain, and certainly betterthan anything else in Alicante.

Opposition councillorssaid the measure should havebeen introduced earlier. Theyurged that IBI tax be chargedon buildings in respect ofowners who are only payingon the land.

But let’s run through themeeting, that was explained tome by Kacey, as everything isin Valencian which I do notunderstand.Point 1 approved theMinutes of the meeting on30th May.Point 2 approved decisionstaken by the Mayor’s officesince 24th September.Point 3 approved payment ofF/2013/62 for 2134,70€Point 4 In approving theaccounts for the 3rd quarter, itwas agreed to work withshopkeepers who haddifficulty making payments tothe Townhall - no mentionabout property owners in thesame position. Point 5 instructed that a pathbe reopened to the public at

Cami XVIII on the industrialestate to provide publicaccess. Point 6 acknowledged thatowners of commercialproperties in La Plaza haveapplied to privatise the area. Point 7 referred to changesneeded to the original plan toreflect the current position inthe Las Laderas urbanisation.Point 8 approved the return ofthe developer’s deposit inrespect of Adsubia Rebaldi 4and 17. Point 9 approved planningand guarantee amendments inrespect of Saladar 2-1, thatwere declared as suitable forbuilding in 2006.Point 10 agreed to amend thewestern boundary limits inrespect of a ravine that hadbeen omitted from the 1990Plan, in respect of C/.Benjamin Britain.Point 11 agreed to cancel adebt in respect of AduanasNorte 3A.Point 12 approved a requestfor a government grant of26,250€ towards the sum of93,750€ to bring aboutEnergy Saving measures.Councillor Paco Catalareminded his colleagues thatupkeep costs also need to bemonitored. Point 13 Storm drains areneeded in Cami Cansaladesthat will cost 145,500€ and itwas agreed to urgently seek agrant of 65,000€ to preventfurther flooding. Point 14 agreed that theCulture Council should beaugmented by local author,teacher and former councillor,Pepa Guardiola, musician andmusical director of XabiaJazz, Kiko Berenguer, teacherand author Paco Reus Boyd-Swan. Live Chess director

and local doctor Rafael Andriasand Isabel Bilbao who has anart gallery.

All of the above motionswere approved unanimously.Point 15 was ‘Questions andAnswers’where councillors(Political Groups) putproposals for approval, that areoften ‘political posturing’ forthe next elections.

Socialists asked for a

reduced rate of IVA oncultural events (like thecinema) but failed to mentionIVA on energy bills, food,clothing, phone, petrol andthe hundreds of other itemsbought by the average family.

Another motion raisedthe fact that the person whohad the bar concession in theSocial Centre has left, and it’snow only being used by thePensioners’ Association. Ifthere were staff, it wouldinvolve employees, and mustbe the subject of a ‘tender’process, but there was nosuggestion as to HOW theproblem could be resolved.

Even though theconcession for Summer use ofthe beach by chiringuitos andbeach furniture had extendedbeyond the mid-Septembercontract period, it wasexplained that those affectedhad agreed to pay anadditional proportional sum tothe Townhall.

There was some doubt as to whether the ‘last Thursday’meeting of Jávea councillors would be brought forwardto the 24th, as the 31st October was ‘Halloween’. Thefirst immediate difference from previous meetings wasthat María Teresa Ferriol López had signed thepaperwork to convene the meeting 3 days earlier, it wasJosé Vicente Catalá Martí, who sat in her seat,

New Council Secretary José Vicente Catalá Martí

Continued on page 10

Finally besides carrying the whole ofthe Freesat listings it also allows you toselect and incorporate non-Freesatchannels, for instance a German orFrench channel.

It goes without saying that the H.D.(High Definition) performance isexcellent as is the quality of the soundperformance. The remote control isquite easy to operate in its manyfunctions and threatens to become oneof the market leaders.

As mentioned before six months can bea long time in the world of electronicsand Peter and I are always on thelookout for new contenders in the worldof LNBs.

Of late two have come our way and inparticular have outstanding performancein the area of cross modulation.

This is quite a complex area, butbasically means that as signals are beingreceived in both Vertical and Horizontalstreams of electrical energy, then thepoor old LNB has the job of separatingthese signals. If it fails to any degreethis then has the affect of attenuating thesignal. You can have an LNB thatoutperforms all others in the amount ofGain it provides and yet if it fails thecross modulation test rendering it quiteuseless. Unfortunately, many, many

Manhattan Official Freesat H.D. DigiboxFor many years Manhattan have beenproducing top quality performers in theworld of satellite receivers (onlysuitable for the person’ NOT ‘interestedin receiving the Sky offerings includingFilms, Sport etc and of course theyrequire a Sky Card and a RegularPayment).

The latest offering is a Freesat H.D.digibox offering some outstandingfeatures. First, and most importantly ithas superb front-end performance, thisis very important when we are receivingsignals of varying signal strengths. Asmost people are aware we are notintended to receive signals from theU.K. indeed the signals eminating fromboth satellite transponders are aimed atthe U.K. and Northern Ireland. This is amost important point to always be awareof!!!

The Manhattan engineers have alsodesigned a full eight-day EPG, givingthe viewer the advantage of being ableto check out what is planned for up toeight days in front and by zippingthrough this section you can check outand store programmes of interest, toensure - by oversight - you will not missanything of interest.(this is very similarin operation to a Sky Satellite receiver!).

Again, I guess, to avoid problems withfamily choice, they have incorporatedan Eight Favourite Family Channel List!This allow each family member to havetheir own listings, filtering out the onesthey are just not interested in.

Astra 2E has been launched and we arestill waiting as I write today (6.11.2013)for it to be located at 28.2 degrees SouthSouth East! As a result I have beeninundated with enquiries as to howsatellite viewers in Jávea andsurrounding districts will be able toenjoy their viewing on much smallersatellite dishes.

The truth is no one knowsuntil final testing on Astra 2E has beencompleted, those of us in the trade canonly make informed guesses!!!

Based on the performance of Astra 2F,I hope that satellite dishes within therange of 1.0 - 1.4 metre high gain willprovide adequate performance. Ofcourse this is all based on a qualityinstallation with peak performanceLNBs and associated coaxial cable andat the end of it, a satellite receiver withgood front-end gain.


is produced at the

in Jávea Port (C/. Toni Llido 5)An announcement for

your businesscan be included for

SUGGESTEDDONATION

Column 25€Half column 15€Module 10€

All announcements are printednext to editorial, to ensure

maximum impact/readership.

Tax deductible receipts givenfor all donations.

[email protected]: 96 646 3707

Jávea Jeard

by Richard Pollock B.Ed I.Eng. FIEEIEConsultant Electronic EngineerFormerly Lecturer in RTVE at Bradford College

Telephone: 670 362 395(Monday to Friday 10am - 6pm)

Satellite Fact File

Clive Readhas been a GL Planwriter

since May, 2005

The price of GL plans increasedat the end of May, 2013.Buy now to avoid further

increases. Tel: 669 386 702

IT’S TIMEYOU TOOK

THEWRIGHT

DECISIONEverything from Design, New-Builds,

Refurbishments and Maintenance

Ian Norton-Wright

Tel: 96 647 0230 Mob: 686 780 570www.wrightpm.co.uk

Continued on page 5


LNBs are sold to the unsuspectingcustomer on the basis of their gain andthen confined to the scrap bin!

We pride ourselves on being veryselective in this area and this is whywhen being called to a poor performingsatellite installation, after checking thatthe alignment is correct, we always thenturn our attention to LNB performance.We can be in a very difficult situationexplaining to someone that the LNB theyonly purchased recently is of poorelectronic quality, but demonstrating theimprovements on one of ourreplacements, always wins the day.

It’s rather the same old story withcoaxial cable. There are many differentbrands and qualities on the market. Mostof the electrical shops offer a smallrange, but these are usually intended forstandard T.V. reception, NOT for satelliteapplications and even those claiming tobe suitable for satellite operation leavemuch to be desired. However, on thebright side of things, there are highquality coaxial cables available and theseare the types we always use. I cannot seethe point of spending my time,sometimes an hour or even longerinstalling rubbish cable knowing it willonly last a year or so under the heat ofour Summers here in Spain.

Often people ring up enquiring the priceof an installation. Sometimes it’sdifficult to be specific, as there are somany uncertainties connected with thereception location, and it’s impossible toquote accurately without coming to seefor ourselves. If you buy on the basis ofprice alone, you likely will be buyingpoor quality components, and only laterwill you learn the hard lesson that “youget what you pay for!!!”

I often speak of ensuring alignment iscarried out using the correct procedureand again having top quality testequipment. Recently I have had all myequipment re-calibrated in readiness forthe Astra 2E, expensive but worth it.Please consider the fact that AstraTransponders are 26,000 Km from earthand if your alignment is a mere fractionout it can make a tremendous differenceto your viewing pleasure. This isparticularly noticable when we sufferpoor weather condition! I did tell you!

Richard Pollock B.Ed I.Eng FIEEIEConsultant Electronic Engineer

Formerly Lecturer at Bradford CollegeTelephone: 670 362 395

(Mon-Fri 10am - 6pm)

HELP CENTRE andworking together to bring you Economicand Comprehensive Private Health Cover

You’ll often see Advertorials (adverts disguised as editorial)recommending other companies. YOU can decide: it’s as simple as 1, 2, 31. PRICE Saving0 - 9 years 619,34€ 824,43€ 205,00€

10 - 19 years 658,14€ 824,43€ 166,29€20 - 29 years 696,86€ 824,43€ 127,57€30 - 39 years 735,57€ 824,43€ 88,86€40 - 49 years 774,28€ 824,43€ 50,15€50 - 59 years 774,28€ 1.213,10€ 438,82€60 - 64 years 989,03€ 1.540,91€ 551,88€65 - 69 years 1.226,72€ 1.941,35€ 714,63€greater than 70 years 1.854,01€ 2.253,57€ 399,56€* www.asssa.es

2. COVERMEDICAL NO LIMIT LIMIT 60 DAYS a YEARHOSPITALIZATION Includes Meds. Medication not included

URGENT NO LIMIT LIMIT 3 DAYS/PROCESSHOSPITALIZATION Includes Meds. Medication not included

PEDIATRIC NO LIMIT LIMIT 60 DAYS a YEARHOSPITALISATION Includes Meds. Medication not included

MEDICAL INTENSIVE LIMIT 45 DAYS/YEAR LIMIT 30 DAYS a YearCARE UNIT Includes Meds. Medication not included

POST SURGERY LIMIT 45 DAYS/YEAR LIMIT 5 DAYS/PROCESSINTENSIVE CARE Includes Meds. Medication not included

PSYCHIATRIC NOT INCLUDED LIMIT 45 DAYS a YEARHOSPITALIZATION Medication not included

COLONOSCOPY Anaesthetic Included Anaesthetic not included

CHIROPODY NOT INCLUDED 6 sessions per year

3. COPAYMENTYOU PAY - each time 2,20€ 1.80€you see doctor as out-patient

Full details from C/. Toni Llido 5, in Jávea Port. Tel: 669 386 702

OTHER

OTHER

COMPLETE

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provider

Provider

60 years experience providing Health Insurance

Specialists in the expat market with policy documents, and phone support in English

New clients accepted up to 80 years of age

Hospitals in Denia, Benidorm and Alicante

Jávea representation by Centro Medico, 5 GPs,Gynocologist, Practicante, 3 Dentists, 3 Analysis Clinics, Ear Nose Throat Specialist,General and Digestive Surgeon,Traumatologist, Urologist. Uncomplicated Application Form

Continued from page 4


You shop at ICELAND for COLDfood at COOL prices, but you’ll

receive a WARM welcome atJávea Evangelical Church

C/. Toni Llido 5GPS - N:38.793196 and E:0.180900

At the rear of ’La Caixa’ bankat the Dolphin roundabout on Av. Lepanto

Sunday morning service 11am

On weekdays visit ourC/. Toni Llido 5 (next to La Caixa in the Port)

where you will find1000s of Greetings Cards for 1€Photocopies and Fast Printing

Crisis Start-up PacksAirport Pick-Ups, Phone Top-ups

Post and Parcel ServicePlus a LISTENING EARand UNBIASED ADVICE

We’re ‘on duty’ in the communityevery day of the week - not just on a Sunday

If you need to speak in private - ASk Tel: 96 646 3707 or 669 386 702

Centre

Last month I highlighted someof the services - weddings andfunerals - where I had been the‘Vicar’. During October I didofficiate at Civil Marriages - byauthority of the Court in Denia- as well as Religious Blessings.For me, the format is similarbut each is different.It began with a ‘joke eMail’At least, that’s what I thought! Back atthe end of June I received an eMailfrom the Priest in Chile who had beenconsecrated a Bishop in the sameSynod ceremony of Holy Communionas myself, in 2006, telling me that hewas considering abdication. We’d hadno communication between us inalmost 7 years. He proposed that Ishould be designated his successor,

and I laughed it off as ajoke in poor taste!

It was absurd: Ilikened it to the Moderatorof the Methodist Churchbeing chosen as Pope. Aseveryone knows I amPastor of Jávea EvangelicalChurch - and have been for22 years - and can be foundin the Oasis Help Centre inthe Port, between 10 and2pm most mornings, and at11am on Sunday for theMorning Service. I’m just‘ordinary’ - but alwaysready for a challenge.

On 8th July I receivedan eMail, with attachedNotification of Abdication,designating that I should - with effectfrom the 1st of July - be theMetropolitan Archbishop (seniorcleric) of the Anglican IndependentCommunion Worldwide.

Following localmisunderstandings following myconsecration as a Bishop in 2006, Ishould make it clear that the AICW isIndependent of the CofE, theArchbishop of Canterbury and theCosta Blanca Chaplaincy.

The only slot my weddingcommitments permitted for theInstallation (as they call it) wasbetween 10th and 15th August, and thepreferred venue, at High Leigh, couldnot be booked as Lord Gray was onholiday.26th OctoberAnd so it was, on Tuesday 22nd thatwe left Alicante Airport for Gatwick,having booked a Mondeo automatic(that’s all there was) with Scarlett CarHire, and accommodation withTravelodge in Gatwick, Wakefield,Sheffield and Milton Keynes. I alwaysuse Scarlett because they never botherto look for any superficial damage thatmight have occured from openingdoors in adjacent parked cars.

Our journey from Gatwick toWakefield was not helped by ablockage on the M1 at Bedford,caused by an overturned tanker.

The people who brought‘care’, ‘comfort’ and

‘understanding’ to bereaved families

in SpainSympathetic and prompt

assistance starts witha phone call to BALBI

on 610 204 864Cremation, Repatriation

or IntermentThanksgiving and Memorial

services arranged,religious or humanist

Cami del Cementerio 2JÁVEA - 96 579 0188

Fax: 96 579 4138

A Pastor’sPoint of

View

or, as

see it

Bishop Bruce, Archbishop George andBishop Tom Cahill ‘lay hands’ to confirmthe appointment.

Continued on page 8


YOU DESERVE A LAUGH

WHERE CAN I GOON A SUNDAY?

There’s lots of new friendswaiting to meet you

- and free tea, coffee, cakeor biscuits afterwards, atThe ‘Oasis’ CentreNEW Sunday venue

C/. Toni Llido, 5GPS - N:38.793196 and E:0.180900

At the rear of ‘LA CAIXA” Bank at the ‘Dolphin Roundabout’

Sunday morning service 11am

If you need transport,phone 669 386 702 or 669 386 701

We are a caring church, meeting 21st century need with

1st century Christian compassion

Every time youTop-Up at the

it helps maintain this HELP andADVICE CENTRE

C/. Toni Llido 5 (behind La Caixa in the Port)Tel: 96 647 3707 and 669 386 702

The Choir top 10Top Ten Reasons for being a Tenor:

10) Tenors get high - without drugs.

9) Name a musical where the bass gotthe girl.

8) You can show the sopranos how itSHOULD be sung.

7) Did you ever hear of anyone paying£500 for a ticket to see The ThreeBasses?

6) Who needs brains when you've gotresonance?

5) Tenors never have to waste timelooking through the self-improvementsection of the bookstore.

4) You can sing along with John Denveron "Aye Calypso".

3) When you get really good at falsetto,you can make tons of money doingvoice-overs for cartoon characters.

2) Gregorian chant was practicallyinvented for tenors. Nobody invented agenre for basses.

1) You can entertain your friends byimpersonating Julia Child.

Top Ten Reasons for being a Bass:10) You don't have to tighten your shortsto reach your note.

9) You don't have to worry about awoman stealing your job.

8) Or a pre-adolescent boy.

7) Action heroes are always basses. Thatis - if they ever sang, they would singbass.

6) You get great memorable lyrics likebop, bop, bop, bop (boong ching ...boong chi-ching).

5) If the singing job doesn't work out,there's always broadcasting.

4) You never need to learn to read trebleclef.

3) If you get a cold, so what.

2) For fun, you can sing at the bottom ofyour range and fool people into thinkingthere's an earthquake.

1) If you belch while you're singing, theaudience just thinks it's part of the score.

Top Ten Reasons for Being a Soprano:10) The rest of the choir exists just tomake you look good.9) You can entertain your friends bybreaking their wine glasses.8) Can you name an opera where an altogot the man?7) When sopranos sing in the shower,they know the tune.6) You are never going to sing the altopart by accident.5) Great costumes - like the hat with thehorns on it.4) How many world-famous altos canyou name?3) When the fat lady sings, she's usuallysinging soprano.2) When you get tired of the tune, youcan sing the descant.1) You can sing along with MichaelJackson.Top Ten Reasons for being an Alto10) You get really good at singing E flat.9) You get to sing the same note for 12consecutive measures (tang ... tang ...tang ...).8) No warm up needed to sing 12consecutive bars of E flat.7) If the choir really stinks, it's unlikelythe altos will be blamed.6) You have lots of time to chat duringsoprano solos.5) You get to pretend that you are betterthan the sopranos, because everybodyknows that women only sing soprano sothey don't have to learn to read music.4) You can sometimes find part-timework singing tenor.3) Altos get all the great intervals.2) When the sopranos are holding someoutrageously high note at the end of ananthem, the altos always get the lastwords.1) When the altos miss a note, nobodygets hurt.

OASIS Centre

TOWN

SEA


Azorin RestaurantC/. Toni Llido Tel: 96 579 4495

Bon Retir elderly care homeC/. Cantallops 31

Tel: 96 579 0242688 883 155

Building and Tiling by [email protected]

Tel: 626 975 244

Butcher’s BlockThe English Butcher in JáveaAv del Pla (North of Yorkshire Linen)

Tel: 96 579 2676Cabo Casse HireTools and MachineryC/. Liverpool 11 (opposite the Moli)

Tel: 96 579 2502

C B InstallationsGlazing, Reforms/Building worksRupert Cooper Tel: 606 662 991

622 872 [email protected]

Let’s Support our localBusinesses

If we don’t we won’t have any Fortunately we were at the rear of the5-hour closure, and only had a 2-hourstop/start wait.

An evening with Ann’s sisterCarol, and husband Peter, was madeeven more enjoyable by chips and fishfor 2 (for £10.80) that easily fed 4 ofus with chips left over.

The following morning, a shortdrive to Sheffield, but we diverted toWath-on-Dearne as I had found theaddress where my father was born.Sadly, when we asked around, thestreet - Wharf Road - no longerexisted. We marvelled at an old-stylebutchers where the meat in thewindow was cut to different sizes,each individually priced, rather than intrays at a certain price.

It was great to see AnnaMarie -our granddaughter - again, and greatgrandsons Cameron and Cian andChris their Dad. The boys are a creditto their parents, living in a part ofSheffield that is not the mostsolubrious, but determined to retaintheir status of no longer depending onBenefits. When we left, Anna gave usa Primark linen bag, that when weopened it was full of sandwiches,Wagon Wheels, tins of drink, Actimeland biscuits.

From Sheffield we were off - againon the M1 - to Milton Keynes. Itlooked like a short journey on the map!One of the advantages of Travelodge isyou never know what - or where - toexpect to have a roof over your head.

We were only a 5 minute drivefrom St. George’s Church. Ann tooklots of photos and my nephew took avideo on his smartphone, but I won’tbore you with the details.

A deaconess - during the Sundaymorning service - asked permission topray against the threatened storm - anddid so. The following morning wedrove to Hounslow to leaveArchbishop Bruce at Travelodge forhis early morning departure onTuesday. We were in Bath Road at thetime when a tree was blown over,crushed a house and created a gasexplosion, but we knew nothing of it,and no rain or strong winds. Praise theLord!

Tuesday was last-minute shopping(after packing our cases) at Halford,Primark (a huge disappointment giveneverything I’d read about them), Argos,Tesco and a craft shop.

It was amazing to find the car parkat Tesco totally FULL on a Tuesdayafternoon. I was surprised at thesmiling faces of people in Crawley -but their skin looked so pale and white(not even pink).

If you live in a Community of Horizontal Owners,we will see if there are problems, and come up

with the answers, IN SPANISH, for YOU tosubmit to the President or Administrator.

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As eye C it - Pastor’s PageContinued from page 6

Continued on page 9


At Gatwick Airport we had to puteverything we’d bought, into casesthat already seemed full to capacity,JUST keeping to the 40kgs limitallowed by Easyjet.

Security posed no challenge to meand I walked through the ‘archway’ asmy anorack, computer and cabin bagwent through the x-ray machine.

Ann, however, was less fortunate:setting off the alarm in the ‘archway’,that required a ‘pat-down’ by a ladyofficer, that not only included all theusual places, but running her handsaround the inside of Ann’s slacks, incase she had anything fastened aroundher waist.

With a “We have to be sure, youunderstand?” Ann joined me to gothrough to the departure lounge. Butwhere was her jacket, computer andcabin bag?

Her ‘security check’ had taken solong that we thought it had ‘goneround again’ - but no - we could see iton the other side of a bullet-proofglass division. “Is our stuff roundthere for any reason?” I asked.

The security guy brought it round,placed it on a special mat, looked athis TV screen and asked “Is thisyours?” and “Is there anything in it

there shouldn’t be. Ann and I bothanswered in unison “Yes” and “No.”

As he unzipped the lid of the cabinbag, he told us - with the confidence ofa man who always believed hisinstruments: “You’ve left your drink inhere!”

“I haven’t!” Ann protested.Everyone laughed when we saw it wasa bottle of Cadbury’s ChocolatePOWDER that had given theimpression it was liquid. We can laughnow, but it all seemed very serious atthe time.

In a few days Ann and I fly to PortElizabeth in South Africa, to consecratetwo new Bishops. It all seems surreal tosomeone who thought his life wouldcontinue to be that of a ‘nobody’ in thetown he has chosen to be his home -Jávea.Keep your comments comingIt’s been encouraging to hear fromvisitors to Jávea Help Centre (open 6days a week from 10am till 2pm and at11am on Sunday for the MorningService), that they missed the articlesthat Ann and I used to write about, hermemories (Ann) and exploits (me)when we had the Jávea Grapevine. Weare grateful for your encouragementand hope you like the evolving JáveaJeard.

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Independent Financial AdviceLee Hodges 699 966 [email protected]

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Milar MoraguesThe corner shop with trade pricesAv. del Pla 43 Tel: 96 646 1677www.milar.es


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Continued from previous page

With the prospect of Sta. Luciacelebrations in December, some treeshave been pruned around the ‘floodlightchurch on the hill’ but the branches needto be removed.

When yellow buoys were removedin the bay that separated swimmers fromwater sport enthusiasts, the contractorchecked the quality of water, confirmingthat there was no unacceptable content,disputing the allegations ofenvironmentalists who believed effluentwas being discharged too close to thebeach, claiming a pipe had been broken.

When the Council meeting is so latein the month, it is difficult for us toprovide answers to questions before wemeet our publishing deadline, but we areaware of the problem, and want tominimise our shortcoming.

If you think you might be affectedby any of the points discussed, contactone of the local councillors - or the HelpDesk at the Citizens’ Action Officeabove ‘Clot’ parking - and they will dotheir best to ensure you have theanswers you seek. CR


MPM Property RepairsMaintanance, Management andRepairs Tel: 96 577 0205

681 005 731

NURSE Gail McCaffertyRGN.NMB regd/[email protected] 667 316 954

Painting and DecoratingPinturas Jaime Ortola 609 677 094www.pinturasortola.net

P C HighwayCalle Niza 13 Tel: 96 646 [email protected]

Pick-up and Deliver ServiceCovering Alicante to Gandia - they’lleven pay for an item and fetch it.Andrea and Mark 633 294 509

Rent an OfficiantFor a Wedding, Funeral, Memorial orThanksgiving occasion:Rev. Clive Read 669 386 [email protected]

Second-hand furniture storeSheila’s Deals 609 827 [email protected]

Septic (toilet) problemsLimpiezas Jávea 608 861 153www.limpiezasjavea.com

Spanish Lessonswww.languagecentremoraira.com

699 216 516

Swiss Cable - and much moreTlf: 96 577 1121

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Taxi [email protected] payment OK - Airports - Tours

633 400 044Tanatorio JáveaUndertaking in your language

Tel: 610 204 864





CHRISTMAS PASTand Christmas Presents

We were amasedhow manyreaders boughtfruit, Veg,packets and tinsinto Oasis HelpCentre for theHarvest Serviceon 20th October.

Most of thedonated itemswere quicklydistributed to

needy families, and some put aside for‘Christmas Hampers’. THANK YOU.

As a result, Ann has suggested weuse the church Christmas tree this yearas a focus for people to donate toys (orcrackers or food) for Jávea’s needyfamilies this Christmas, New Year and‘Kings’. We will distribute the itemsthrough Peter and Tricia Cox at HarvestStore, and Marcos and Chielo at theCasa de Oracion (House of Prayer).

Ann is willing to wrap items forpeople donating whose fingers are nolonger as nimble as they once were, andto supply wrapping paper and labels aswell.

Let’s prove again that Jávea is acommunity that cares. Yes, we are aninward-looking people (it’s a symptonof Jávea’s isolation) but a time to say“We look after our own!”

A year inthe life ofa Spanish

townXabia / Jávea

Words by the late Charlene Quinceand photos by Billie Cook

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Collection and delivery of Urgent items in Marina Alta

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October Council MeetingContinued from page 3


Port library and Social Centre finally opens

The new library and social centre, nextto the health centre in the Port wasrecently inaugurated. Work on theproject began in March 2011, and was tohave been completed by October 2011by the construction company ECISA fora fixed contract fee under the regionalgovernment's "Plan Confianza". Theestimated cost at tender had been€1,147,000 and ECISA had come in at€831,000. (In July 2011 the companyput in a claim for unforeseen priceincreases on materials).

The Town has occupied the buildingbut not yet officially taken it over sinceif it does, it loses the right to claim the€200,000 cost difference which it needsto improve the building. The Town Hallhas already had to spend €8,000 toconnect the building to the sewerage anddrainage networks - an aspect which wasnot covered by the project.

Sadly, shelves intended for books inother than Castillian Spanish andValencian are all empty and when Iasked a member of the library staff ifEnglish books could be donated, I wastold “Yes not not yet.”

I thought it best to ask permission beforetaking a photo of current PSOE Mayortalking to the former PP Mayor, but theywere both happy, not only chatting awayto each other, but to be photographed atthe opening of a project that began withone and came to fruition with the other.CR

Jávea Jeard and Oasis Help Centre ispleased to support the aims of MABCand publish the names and contactinformation for their members. We arehappy to promote local businesses, in this‘old-fashioned’ and ‘traditional’ magazineif they contact: [email protected]

MABCmeetingsare heldonce oftwice amonth

Peter Williamson MA MSc www.lawlesswilliamson.comPorcelain Painting Club Lavender Studio Hand painted decorative ceramics andporcelain - hand made customised greetingcards - classes - club.Rabbit FX [email protected] (Round Town News)50,000 copies every week, reaching 175,000readers. Colin Rich - Tel: 607 553 870 Solar in Spain Time to turn to solar Tel/fax: 902 636 570http://www.solarinspain.comemail: [email protected] Financial Advisers

John Haywardwww.financialadviceinspain.esSt James Place Wealth Management www.sjpp.co.uk/neilgubbins Specialist financial advice, particularlyduring periods of volatility and change.The Art Centre Association, Jáveawww.facebook.com/ArtJavea Encouragingbeginner and experienced artists intraditional and contemporary arts and crafts. The Sign Shop, Javea Computers and [email protected] Tel: 96 579 0710Tom Parkinson www.jacksons-group.comChartered AccountantsTV Satellite Equipment & Installation Peter Hoffer www.tvsateq.com Electronic repairs since 1972. Tel: 96 646 1662 & 630 352 172U P Publications Ltd Designers and authors publisher and adviser.UKTV4U 10€ monthly. No contract,http://www.uktv4u.comWising UP! Online www.wising-up.co.uk

Copi Shop Online 96 507 4549 and 610 206 [email protected] Griffin Peers www.gaile.biz/web Grapevine Magazine www.grapevinespain.com/javeaEasy Flatpax (Bringing IKEA to you - the easy way) www.easyflatpax.com Tel: 96 647 0770Fontana Design www.fontanadesign.eu Tel: 634 419 247Haweli Restaurant [email protected] Tel: 677 004 651 Javea Photos Choose from 4,300 photos.Juan Luis Millet Sancho - Notary Tel 96 592 3522Lawns in Spain www.lawnsinspain.com Mob: 676 863 778 Skype: [email protected] Spain News and Views from around Jávea www.lifestylespain.comLucia Rajah Social Media and Tuxedo Hire Landline: +34 96 647 0770Mai Griffin – Author, Artist www.maigriffin.comPortraits, Still Life and Landscapes. Tel: 96 646 1913Marina Alta Business Club www.mabusinessclub.com/mabcMarina Alta Business Community www.marina-abc.com/community

Mike Peers – Creative Design Mike Peers Graphics Design Studio, Tel: 97 646 1913, [email protected] Destination Alicante Sarah Farrell Locally informed, globally [email protected] Antiques Review Sharing information on Antiqueswww.antiquesreview.infoOscar Ricor – Abogado English speaking regulated Costa BlancaAbogado - operating throughout Spain. Tel: 687 88 88 73www.ricorabogados.comPeri Pera Cafe, Jávea PortBistro Bar, Theme Nights, Private hire forDinner Parties and Celebrations.Tel: 677 253 488 (Tracy)Phoenix Computers @ The Sign Shop [email protected] Tel: 96 579 0710

but there were no dates or venuesat www.mabc.biz


The first time I met Tarick was when Istill had some spare cash - having beenswindled by BNP Paribas of280.000€uros - and I was looking for aninvestment that was ‘rock solid’.

On Facebook I kept seeingreferences to a shop where they boughtgold - ‘swag’ as they called it - and met aman I found utterley charming, but witha physique that not only would frightenme on a dark night, but whom I’d try toavoid in daylight - until I got to knowhim better.

Yes, he could sell me Kilo goldingots but I soon realised I’d have aproblem with where to keep it. Anotherman had offered to buy gold for me,look after it for me, and use it on thestockmarket to make me more money.That sounded even riskier than BNPParibas had been.

I didn’t buy gold nuggets fromTarick, but I did buy an iPhone 4S (thatwas subsequently stolen by anopportunist thief as I opened-up thechurch on a Sunday morning), andTarick gave me a good rate when Ineeded to exchange £ and €uros.

I had so many questions about him.He seemed “too good to be real” so Idecided to see if I could unearth the truthabout ‘the Jávea swag man’.

It’s an unusual name?It’s my real name and given to myparents, like any other child’s name.They brought me from where I was bornin London, to Calpe when I was 15, andthey opened a Lebanese restaurant. Theyhad the restaurant for 13 years and myfirst job was as a barman.

Where do you live?I live with my wife and children inCalpe, but chose to open ‘Gold Rush’ inJávea because I think there is wisdom innot working from the area where youlive. Like so many before me, I choseJávea to give me a ‘new start’ - awayfrom people I might have removed fromlicensed premises because they wereunable to handle the drinks they’d drunk.

But why Gold?A friend had a gold shop in Alicante andone day when I went there, I wasfascinated and curious that one couldmake money - and friends - by buyingand selling gold, often that was brokenor jewellery that the owner no longerwore.

So?I recognised the need for research, so Itook an 18k chain my friend had valued,and visited all the jewellers and goldbuyers I could find, asking ‘Is this realand what’s it worth?’ Not one of themoffered me anything like the price myAlicante friend said it was worth as‘scrap’ to be smelted down.

I consider myself quite worldly andknowledgable and realised that mostpeople have even less - or no -knowledge than me, and were unawarethat they were being offered far less thanthis commonly owned asset was worth.

I realised there was a goldenopportunity (excuse the pun) waiting tobe exploited. Check the quality, weighthe amount, do the sums, and there’sanother rejoicing customer.

What next?I started off using Facebook to makelighthearted joke type adverts lettingeveryone know that a broken braceletcould equal a weekend away and it hastaken off massively.

The shop on Jávea Arenal is busyweekday mornings and I travelthroughout the area, and even down toMurcia, to meet people in their homeswho are unhappy travelling with their‘swag’ to visit me in Jávea.

Some people want to buy jewelleryitems even before I’ve had theopportunity to melt it down, and it’s likerehoming a puppy - to have hopefullyfound it a new home. I becameinterested in quality watches as well, butnothing is allowed to jeopardise themost important facet of my business life- having a completely flawlessreputation.

And to relaxAs a family we enjoy a diverse range offood and I try to eat out as often as I can,and that’s often enjoying Indian!!

I work hard and have alwaysadmired people with a massive workethic who find time for their familiesand I aspire to be the same.

I like going to the gym, boxing andkeeping fit, eating out and shopping forclothes! The majority - probably 80% -of my clients are female, because it isthem that have the swag!! It alwaysupsets me when I have to tell them their‘ex’ gave them jewellery that was‘pretty’ but ‘worthless’.

And the futurePeople suggest I should expand - andwith customers travelling from as faraway as Madrid I can appreciate thetemptation, but protecting my reputationmight then be out of my hands. I’mlooking at having a jeweller workinghere and at the many requests to be acurrency dealer.

My client base grows every day -presenting many opportunities - butnone outweighs the need to treat people‘right’ and ‘fair’ and close each day withmore friends than I had that morning.

GEORGE AND SHEILAGeorge and Sheila, lived in a mobilehome park. He was a widower and she awidow and they had known one anotherfor a number of years.

At supper one evening, findingthemselves at the same table, Georgemade several admiring glances at Sheilaand he finally gathered his courage toask her, "Sheila, will you marry me?"

After about five seconds of carefulconsideration, Sheila answered. "Yes.Yes, I will."

Next morning, George was troubled:"Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?"He couldn't remember. Try as he would,he just could not recall. It was withsome trepidation that he telephonedSheila, firstly, explaining he didn'tremember as well as he used to. Then hereviewed the lovely evening past. As hegained confidence, George asked"Sheila, when I asked if you wouldmarry me, did you say 'Yes' or did yousay 'No'?"

George was delighted to hear Sheilasay, "I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meantit with all my heart." Then shecontinued, "I am so glad that you called,because I couldn't remember for the lifeof me who had asked."

Jávea’s ‘Jolly Swag Man’

Promoting the Muscat grape as a regional productA recent conference in Benitachellshowcased the sustainable economicpotential of locally grown Muscatgrapes. Firstly there has been theinitiative of growing the grapesorganically, and making quality winesfrom their juice, (Biomoscatell project),also using the grape and its raisins asingredients both in local cuisine andinnovatively in sauces and chutneys.

Adult literacy and numeracy'among the worst in OECD': Most still cannot understand anelectricity bill, say researchers.

Spain has one of the worst adultnumeracy and literacy levels in thedeveloped world, according to a reportby the Organisation for EconomicCooperation and Development (OECD).The average adult's reading abilitymeans they are unable to understandtheir electricity bills and cannot makehead or tail of classic texts such as DonQuijote. Overall, the country has basicacademic levels that are 21 and 19 percent lower than the average for theOECD in reading comprehension and 23and 22 per cent lower in maths.

Spain's low productivity problemThe question of productivity has neverbeen seriously addressed in Spain - notwhen the economy was miraculouslybooming and not even now when thecountry is facing record levels ofunemployment, a lack of public funds,and financial markets still prone tohitting the panic button.

The need to improve productivity isconstantly mentioned in speeches andarticles, and efforts are made to analyzeit, but this key element ofcompetitiveness is among Europe'sworst, and Spain's businesses have littleidea, other than reducing wages yetfurther, on how to improve it…..

Spain's low productivity is in largepart explained by the dominant role ofconstruction and services in the Spanisheconomy. But it's not the only factor,….Spain has low productivity and hasunderinvested in R+D, which holdsback competitiveness.

Unemployment up again as the summer season endsIn September, unemployment in theMarina Alta region rose by 884,reflecting the dependence of the regionon the tourist sector. 95% of the newlyunemployed came from this sector and60% of these were women.

The figure for Jávea was 167 newlyunemployed.


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We rely on your [email protected]: 96 646 3707

Jávea Jeard

APPROVEDPROJECTS for 2014

Listed according to estimated cost

1 Buy chairs and tables for useby different associations 2200€

2 Fence around sports hall 4,500€3 Re-equip 27 climbing 5,120€5th pitches at Ambolo and Sta Lucia4 Artificial grass on Avda.

Paris Roundabout 7,500€5 Multi-purpose area for

young people 8,000€6 Artificial grass on 13,400€

Palmela/Fontana roundabouts7 Making safe, area around

Principe de Asturias wall 13,500€8 Artificial grass on roof

of Registro 29,500€9 Climbing wall on outside1st of Trinquete Court 31,000€10 3km of anti 4a jellyfish net 45,000€11 Plants for municipal parks

and garden areas 50,000€12 Resurfacing Av. Juan Carlos3rd (erasing confusing lines) 55,000€13 Sports area for the Arenal 57,734€14 Replace playground Eqp. 90,000€15 Underground rubbish

bins in Jávea Park 70,000€16 Improvements to

Frontenis court 79,618€17 Roof the Amuda RiuRau2nd and install electricity 85,000€18 More children’s parks in

Arenal and Port 100,000€19 Arenal football 4b ground 150,000€20 Convert windmill to a6th living museum 170,000€21 Athletics area/track 240,000€

22 projects (1-21) were shortlisted byTownhall staff as qualifying, feasibleand not specifically the responsibility ofother Givernment (or private) agencies.

Javea Jeard highlighted the needfor 12 (road resurfacing) and 20(creating a living windmill museum)and though the Windmill project won7th place in the votes, its cost exceededthe 500,000€ budget, so other (lesspopular but less expensive) projects willbe considered.

The Windmill project now needs tobe the subject of funding fromgovernment and educational agencies,in Spain, Europe and Worldwide. It willbe a huge Tourism generator, whencompleted, and should to be promotedby Jávea but funded from further afield.

Agenda 21Jávea

Updates

Jávea Jeard is grateful to ChrisJones for compiling the Agenda 21reports, on which this report is basedhttp://agenda21-xabia.wikidot.com



StraightTalkingby Lee Hodges, Independent Financial Adviser

Investing for IncomeInvesting for a sensible income canbe quite tricky. Expatriatenewspapers are literally littered withfinancial advisers offering fundswhich will provide high levels ofincome, and enticing you with cleverphrases and annual statistics, andaccompanied by the standardwarning ‘the value of your capitalcould go down as well as up’! Well,to put it to you bluntly (straighttalking), if you invest in somethingwith high levels of income, you willlose your money!

Finance is all about head-linerates. When it comes to oursavings, the higher the rate offeredthe more interested we become. So,when an investment company offersa rate of, say, 7% per annum, oureyes light up, our brains start tocalculate what this means inmonetary terms, and we begin todream about a higher standard ofliving. Unfortunately, these dreamsonly tend to last for a relatively shortperiod of time.

Investing is all about ‘risk and reward’. The higher the reward, or potentialreward, the higher the risk. If a fundis offering 7% per annum, when thevast majority of other similar fundsare offering around 5%, then thisextra return has to come fromsomewhere. In the main, this willoften mean that the investmentmanager is taking higher risks tosecure the head-line or anticipatedrate of return. The problem is, that

the investor will not often realise thefull extent of the risk until it is toolate.

Now the technical bit. One way to determine the risk of afund is to look at its StandardDeviation and Sharpe Ratio.Standard deviation measures howwidely the actual return on aninvestment varies around its averageor expected return. The greater thestandard deviation, the greater thevolatility and therefore the riskassociated. The Sharpe ratio is ameasure of the risk-adjusted returnof an investment. It measures theexcess return for every unit of riskthat is taken in order to achieve thereturn. In essence, the higher theSharpe ratio the better the return onan investment compensates aninvestor for the risk taken. Anegative Sharpe ratio indicates that arisk-free asset would have performedbetter than the investment beinganalysed (or held in your portfolio).

When establishing your portfolio, you must determine the level of risk to your capital. If the returns proffered appear high,it could be that the underlying risk ishigher than you would normally feelcomfortable with. I would also

suggest that you look to avoid Fundswith the word ‘high’ in them, forexample, High Yield Fund or HighIncome Fund. This does effectivelymean that you will be investing inassets with high volatility andpotentially high negative returns. Of course, it does also mean youroverall return could be positive, butyou must look at the risk and thus thepotential downside. If you are acautious or low risk investor, do notput all your money into highyielding/income funds. Whilst thereare occasions when these funds doprovide a good return, they are stillrisky asset classes.

For more information about how youcan invest with confidence, visit myweb-site www.leehodges.es, call oremail me as shown below.

LEE HODGES CERTPFS HAS LIVED ANDWORKED IN SPAIN FOR OVER 16 YEARS.HE IS CURRENTLY SITTING THEDIPLOMA IN REGULATED FINANCIALPLANNING. FOR TRULY PROFESSIONALFINANCIAL ADVICE, CALL LEE ON 966463 876, OR EMAIL HIM [email protected]

INFORMATION CONTAINED IN THISARTICLE DOES NOT CONSTITUTEADVICE, AND IS FOR INFORMATIONPURPOSES ONLY. THE AUTHOR TAKESNO RESPONSIBILITY FOR ACTION TAKENAS A RESULT OF THIS ARTICLE. E&OE.

Opening hours: 10.00 - 24.00 - Closed Saturdays

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You’re assured of good adviceand top-notch service, food & value

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RENTALSModern top floor west and southfacing apartment, basementparking, store room, furnished,central heating, hot-cold air-con,community pool, views to Montgo mountain. €450month. Ref: HOR232320 LONG LET

Available now!! First floor three bedroom, 2bath apartment, located betweenPort and Old town of Jávea.Close to all amenities, communalpool, unfurnished and u’groundparking. LONG TERM RENTAL!!! €550 monthRef: HOR232391

LONG TERM Spacious duplex 3 beds, 2 bathapartment close to allamenities. Furnished, radiatorheating, hot and cold air-con,community pool, pets allowed.€600 month. Ref: HOR232306WINTER RENT - available 1st Oct. 2013 - 31March 2014. Well presented and tastefullyfurnished corner, 3 bed, 2 bath,ground floor apartment close toamenities and beach in port areaof Jávea. Basement parking andstore room, cable T.V. €700 Month Ref:HOR232398

As new three bedroom top floorapartment, distant sea views,convenient location, close to allamenities, parking available,unfurnished, available immediatelyfor Long Let. €850 month. Ref: HOR232367

Detached villa, sea views, unfurnished orfurnished, pets allowed, 4 beds,3 bath, garage, storage space.€1200 month includes garden/pool maintenance. Available 1stweek Nov. 2013. Ref: HOR232190.

LONG TERM RENTAL!! Quality villa withhot/cold air conditioning, central heating, 3 beds, 2 bath, furnished, bigstore room, pets allowed.Price includes pool andgarden maintenance.€1800 month Ref: HOR232239

This is a SMALL selection (yes, we know the pictures are small - but they

are better than nothing) from our database of over 1300 properties.

Reformed villa with Montgomountain backdrop. Private pool,summer kitchen, garage, ampleparking, separate accomm-odation connected to the main living area. 5 Bed,4 bath. €395,000 Ref: HO232248

Character villa with separateguest apartment, 5 bedrooms intotal, 5 bathrooms, summerkitchen and private pool.€420,000 Ref: HO232389

Detached villa withgood views to Jávea bayand Montgo mountain.Double garage, beautifulgardens, 10 x 5 metre pool. 5 beds, 3 bath.€449,000 Ref: HO232356

Well maintained and presented villa, just 5minutes from Jáveaand Benitachell in arural area. Independentannexe which would beideal as an office, gym,studio etc. 5 beds, 4bath, €495,000 Ref: HO232299

Elegant style villa, 3beds 2 bath, in landscapedgardens, summer kitchen,private pool and Washingtonpalms, in prestigious area ofresidential detached villas. Secure parking withintegral garage. €525,000 Ref: HO232344

Five bedroom detached villa in quietresidential area, fabulouspanoramic views of Montgomountain. 3 bath, largepoolside terrace with qualityfitted summer kitchen, barand adjoining thatched cabana, garage andample parking. €575,000 Ref: HO232372

Renovated finca just0.5kms from the village ofJesus Pobre and 7kms fromJávea and Denia. 5 beds, 3bath,lLots of character,many special features. €595,000 HO232207

Country villa reformed to aquality finish. Olive and almondtrees, Stables, paddockprivate pool, summer kitchen,Montgo mountain views. 4 beds, 4 bath. €795,000 Ref: HO232112

Av. Lepanto 2, Edif. Puerto Real, 03730 Jávea Port - Tel: 96 579 0803LOOKING TO BUY, SELL or RENT in JÁVEA AREA?

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Erreos & Omissions Excepted

were no shops that sold UK food andwhen we returned to the UK forholidays we would come back ladenwith all the essentials needed to survivein a foreign country. Tea bags werealways top of our list, followed bybacon, oxos, tinned beans and a host ofother things. When we had visitorscome to stay with us, they alwayscontacted us beforehand to find outwhat we wanted them to bring over forus and bacon was always a firmfavourite. There was no Quicksave orIceland where virtually anything youcan possibly want is now available andif you had asked me in those early dayswhat I most missed from the UK, Iwould have told you the range of frozenready meals and bread that wereavailable in the UK and Englishtelevision programmes. So imagine mydelight when first Quicksave, thenIceland came to Jávea and all the food Ihad craved for became available.

The roads were much quieter inthose days. July and August werealways much busier when the peoplefrom Madrid and other parts of Spaincame to Jávea to spend time in theirholiday homes, but when the secondweekend of September arrived,everything became tranquil again andthe heavy traffic disappeared overnight.

There were very few homeswith a telephone and people paid adeposit and went on waiting lists foryears. Fortunately we had one in ournew home, I don't think Clive wouldhave bought it if there hadn't been one!When telephones became more readilyavailable, the people that had paid adeposit and were on the waiting list, losttheir deposit and had to pay for the newinstallation in full!!

Three months after we"retired!" from the UK, we were boredout of our minds with having nothing todo!!! So we went into partnership with afriend known as "Ted the Talk" (TedEvans who, with his wife Maggie, builtthe apartment block and launderetteopposite Mas y Mas in the Arenal), toimport and install satellite systems.People were prepared to pay more than£2,000 (in 1986) for a 2.4 metre dish,LNB and receiver, to be able to watchCNN and ONE film channel. How


TIMECHANGESTHINGSOn November 20th 1985, my husbandClive and I left Shirebrook inDerbyshire, to the waves and shouts ofgoodbye from residents and staff of theResidential Care Home we had ownedand managed for four years and whichhad also been our home. It was sad to beleaving 'Ivy Lodge' and our friends butwe were excited at the prospect of a newlife in Spain.

Rusty our golden labrador andSnowie our (black) labrador collie weresafely tucked up in blankets on the backseat of our car and we were ready for ourjourney down to Plymouth where wewere to spend our last night in England,before sailing to Santander the nextmorning.

The journey was uneventful butthe dogs did give us some concern whilewe were on the ferry. I had taken abucket, brush, dustpan, disinfectant andbottles of water ready to clear up anymess they made on the car deck, butneither of them would do anything, noteven to spend a penny! When we arrivedat Santander 24 hours later, we stoppedat the first convenient place and gavethem a run and boy were they relieved!

We spent the first three weeksin our holiday villa in Adsubia, but onthe 13th December we completed thepurchase of our new home on the otherside of Jávea in Seniola. It was theproperty that six years later, the LadyElizabeth School rented from us formany years for their primary school.

When we left the UK theweather had been cold, wet and gloomyand the sunshine and warmth of Jáveawas a real change. The dogs loved theirnew home. There was a large garden forthem to run around in and during theday, if we had to go out, we were able toleave the door to the glazed in naya openso they could go in and out as theypleased.

Jávea in 1985 was a verydifferent place than that of today. There

It only costs 10€ a month

to promote YOUR NAMEin a space this size in

Jávea Jeard- the magazine Jávea peopleare talking about and READ.

Tel: 669 386 702or call and see Clive at the

Oasis Help Centre.

Peter AylingStill here when others have left

Tel.: 96 646 0933Mob.: 616 375 608

Womanto Woman(but men are welcome)

the welcome return of Ann Readafter a 5-year ‘rest’

technology has changed over the years,now most of us receive many of the UKchannels by one of the many optionsavailable.

Of course, one sad change inthe area is the wave of migration theother way, and over the years we haveseen a number of friends and neighboursreturn to the UK. Not as many as youwould expect - at the time - but lookingback there have been many, due in themain, to declining health and theinability to communicate with medicalstaff. We also found that women inparticular that had grandchildren in theUK found it very difficult to be so faraway from the family, and eventually,they packed up and returned. Nowadaysthere is a deluge of people going back tothe UK, unable to earn money in Spain,and such poor investment income thatevery month is a struggle. Many morewould have left Jávea, had they beenable to sell their homes here.

Sometimes people who havelived here for many years, some longerthan I have, moan to me about the waythings have changed but time moves onand progress with it.

I love living in Jávea. Yes, things have changed, but this is stillParadise to me. What is the alternative? Ihave just returned from a week's holidayin the UK and would NOT like to returnthere!!!! The roads are a nightmare. Wearrived in Gatwick very late on the



"Supercell" Thunderstormbrings hail damage to Jávea Golf, Benitachell, andMoraira/TeuladaAn article in Las Provincias noted thatOct 4th - St Francis day, often denotes achange in the weather.

Parts of Jávea got the full blast.Earlier, local meteorologist, ToniBolufer (MeteoXàbia) remarked that astorm was building up in the interior..and could be heading our way. By7.00pm a short, violent deluge of large(golfball +) hailstones hammered someof Jávia's southerly urbanisations nearthe golf course. The hail also affectedBenitachell and Teulada / Moraira.

There were tales of dented cars,smashed windscreens, broken tiles andgutters. This kind of large hail isapparently more common inland, not onthe coast. But this is the second suchstorm in recent months, one hitting areasnear Orba with large hail in May andleaving Jávea's Arenal beach white assnow.

Town hall cuts fire breaks at Tossal GrosJávea’s department of the environmenthas begun work on a 50m wide firebreak in the Tossal Gros area in anattempt to hinder forest fires and protecthousing on Tesoro Park and laMandarina from fires in the dense forestbehind. This comes in the wake of firesstarting in the Tarraula area over the pastfew years.

Plan for the worst caseflooding scenarioAt a conference in Calpe, Prof JorgeOlcina of Alicante Universityrecommended that the worst casescenario should be the benchmark inplanning for flood defences in theMarina Alta area. Jávea has the Spanish record for themost rain in 24 hours at 871mm in 1957.He noted that 200 mm in one and a halfhours could cause a disaster, and thatthis area is prone to torrentialdownpours.

Urban development had blocked offthe natural river mouths in Calpe andJávea, and that of the Girona river.

Barriers to demolishing illegal buildings in SpainFive years after Spain's constructionbubble spectacularly burst, theEnvironment Ministry says it is facing"serious problems" when it comes todemolishing thousands of buildingsthroughout the country that contraveneplanning laws, but were given the greenlight by local councils often in cahootswith property developers.

Owners of condemned properties areusing delaying tactics to put off thearrival of the wrecking ball for as longas possible.

When it comes to stopping ademolition order from going ahead, thecourts have discovered that people willgo to just about any lengths. In the fouryears that on average it takes to carryout a demolition order, officials say thatthey have come upon a wide range ofruses, from the case of an illegallyconstructed property on agriculturalland that the owner said was the officesof his bee-keeping business, to morecomplex scams such as fakingphotographs to make it look as though abuilding had been knocked down.Greenpeace says there are at least50,000 houses along the coast inValencia that lack the necessary permitsor that contravene zoning laws.

The clash of Spain’s culture and businessNewcomers to Spain are oftenconfronted by the leisurely way ofSpanish life, and if expatriate weblogswere any indicator, Spain’s businessculture would be characterised bysiestas and slowness. Yet this Spanishstereotype belies a hard-working culturelong established in Spain’s major citiesand large companies.

The transition is not yet consistentacross the country, smaller companiesstill struggle to operate in a countrywhere culture clashes with modernisedwork schedules.

The continued practice of closing forsummer holidays stands against Spain’seconomic contraction of 1.6 per cent inthe second quarter, and one of thehighest unemployment rates in Europeat 26.6 per cent.

A lot of companies aren’t closingany more during August because they’rescared they won’t be around inSeptember. But in the near future it willchange more because the world ischanging and it’s just not effective to beclosed for even two weeks,

Amjasa signs R&D agreementwith Polytechnic UniversityJávea's municipal water company hasentered into a research and developmentagreement with the PolytechnicUniversity of Valencia.

UPV will carry out a nine monthstudy and audit of the water distributionsystem and energy usage and develop amathematical model of the supplynetwork. This will enable the relocationof pressure reducing valves whichminimise leakage, and enable areduction in the energy needed todistribute water throughout the town'shilly municipality.

It is hoped these actions will halvecurrent energy use. The work covered

by this agreement will be carried out bythe Engineering and Water Technologygroup (ITA) of UPV which hasextensive experience in the field andwill be directed by Enrique Cabrera,Professor of Fluid Mechanics.

ITA researchers will work withAMJASA technicians so they can applythese skills and strategies to other partsof the network. This agreement will alsohelp meet a strategic objective of theUniversity: i.e. to transmit knowledgefor applied use in the field.

Spanish government sued over Solar Energy reformSpanish conglomerate Abengoa hasdecided to take legal action against theSpanish government for the reduction inthe premium rates paid for thermosolarenergy in its reform of the domesticelectricity sector. The Seville-basedcompany has decided to take itscomplaint not only to the Spanish courtsbut also abroad, given that some of itsthermosolar plants are owned by acompany called CSP Equity Investment,which is registered in Luxembourg. As aresult it is seeking internationalarbitrage of its dispute with theconservative Popular PartyGovernment…. company sourcesindicated (compensation) would bearound 60 million euros for each year inwhich the dispute is not resolved.Abengoa's solar energy division accounts for about a quarter of totalgroup revenues. The concessions it haswith the government are for 40 years.

Casa Segura LocksmithsWe have been made aware of two

separate incidents where tourists havepicked up their hire cars at the airport

and had them broken into insupermarket car parks, on the way to

their destination. The suitcases were thegive away. These robberies took place atCarrefour in Benidorm, and Lidl, here in

Jávea. So please warn your guests.

Another robbery took place on theMontgo, where the Villa was left open,while the family were around the pool.Fortunately the ipads etc had trackers,and the Guardia recovered them and astash of similar items in a nearby villa.

Lock up, even if you're around the pool.Protect your property this summer!

For a free site survey or free security review, call

Carl Barclay to make an appointment (+34) 659 853 645

www.locksmithspain.netAvenida del Pla 116 (Arenal)


Agenda 21 updatesContinued from page 13


Gulleys cleaned and widened for flood preventionJávea Town Hall has cleaned, widenedand shaped a number of key gulleyssuch as the Barranco de Lluca (the mostrisky.. after the Rio Gorgos), theBarranco de Castellans (which wasalmost lost among houses and damagedduring floods in 1999), Puxol, andCuesta de San Antonio.

Flu jabs for residents without SIP cardsThe regional Health Department hasannounced that this year it will vaccinateeveryone in the high risk groups againstflu, for free, whether or not the personhas a SIP card. Risk groups are: Thoseover 60, pregnant women, emergencymedical personnel and people withchronic illness (such as diabetes).

Jávea’s upmarket villasAn article in Diarioinformacióndescribes how the seriously rich arebuilding houses in Jávea. People arepurchasing 2-4 adjacent plots in primepositions with stunning sea views andbuilding luxury villas priced at over amillion Euros. The profile of the buyershas changed and these days Russianshave entered the top of the market.Examples given are a 850m2 villa inCuesta de San Antonio sold for a cool€4.2 million, and a 1,000m villa on a5,000m plot with three swimming poolsin Capsades prced at 5.5€ million.

An October Indian SummerMeteoXàbia's (www.meteoxabia.com)records show summer temperatures inJávea during October: Old Town: 32.2C,Port, 31.2C.

Spain looks looks towards "Habitat Banking"Can you put a price tag on a beechgrove? What about a prairie of Posidoniaoceanica seagrass? How much money isa bee's pollination work worth? TheSpanish government wants to encouragesomething called habitat banking, orbiodiversity banking. It is a controversialconcept because it allows developers tooffset the environmental impact of theirroad, building or factory by purchasingan environmental recovery projectelsewhere. Similar projects have beenunderway in the United States since the1980s.

Make sure you don't fall off the PadrónThe law requiring EU citizens inscribedon the padrón (town register) to renewtheir commitment every five years waspassed in 2008 -five years ago. Non EUresidents need to re-register every twoyears. If they do not renew, they run the

risk of being struck off the list, howeveran EU citizen who has registered achange of address gets another fiveyears as from that date. The Town hall issending out letters to everyone whoneeds to renew, but given the vagariesof the postal system its probably a goodidea to check if you're on the registerand about to fall off via the Citizen'sAdvice Office above the Portal del Clot.If you would like to vote in EUelections in Spain, and haven'tpreviously done so, should go to theCitizen's attention Office before Jan 31st2014. The elections are on May 25th2014.

Youth Hostel concept arrives in JáveaJávea architect Eduardi Diego decidedto convert his family's protected 19thCentury house into a new type oflodging for Xàbia, a youth hostel - Thehostel, on Principe de Asturias, whichhas been open over the summer sleeps50, in bedrooms for 4 or 8 people. Itretains the traditional facade and charmof the old building, providing everyneed for guests. To date it has seenvisitors of 15 different nationalities.

La Plana windmills to be lit upThe Town Hall has started work toilluminate two of Jávea’s distinctive LaPlana windmills (numbers 7 and 8) atnight. Lighting will be provided by solarpanels and LEDs, and there are securitymeasures to protect the installation fromrobbers and vandalism. This €20,000project was voted for by Jávea’s citizensin the 2013 Participatory Budget. It isplanned in time to extend lighting to thethree other windmills which aremunicipally owned.

EU environment ministers callfor action on climate policyThirteen European environmentministers and dozens of business leadershave urged the European Union to adopt“ambitious” energy and climate goalsfor 2030 to create a low-carboneconomy in Europe to spur investment.In a 40-page document released at agreen growth conference in Brussels,they also said the 28-nation bloc shouldreform the structure of the EU’sEmissions Trading System (ETS) andoffer a strict emissions cut pledge at aclimate summit next autumn.

Property sales upThe first six months of 2013 saw anincrease of 24% in house sales over thesame period last year. In the 31municipalities of the Marina Alta regionthere were 873 transactions. This figureis substantially higher than 701 in 2012.These are the best statistics in the areasince 2010 and demonstrate the pulleffect of lower prices. Banks have beenselling properties with discounts rangingup to 60%.

Tendering for management of the Canal de la Fontana early in the New YearThe Ministry of Infrastructure is drawingup the complex documentation for thetendering of a 30 year managementcontract of the Canal de la Fontana andits berths. It is expected that thetendering process will take place in thefirst quarter of 2014. The projectforesees some 385 berths, a minimuminvestment of €4.2 million, and anannual tax of €65,000 payable to theValencia Government. One main concernis the future status of the slipway at theend of the canal. This is currently usedwithout charge by many boat ownerswho keep their boats at home. The onlyother slipway in Jávea is in the Port - andthis is closed to the public. Though thereis a base for a crane there, the crane hasnot yet been installed.

Yet another proposal for the Montañar…Another proposal put forward to theTown Planning Committee (Conselld'Urbanisme) about parking on Montañar1, is the banning of all parking on thesea-side of the road between the Port andthe Parador. Instead the bike lane wouldbe transferred to the sea-side along witha pedestrian way (5m wide) - while carswould be parked on the landward side,either parallel to the pavement, or inchevrons, through in the latter case theroad would have to be made one way.

AGENDA 21Continued from previous page

TOWING CARAVANFOR SALE @ 4000€

Lunar Ariva GT - 1998Chosen by drivers for its narrow profile

Imported Spain - 2003Excellent condition and fullyequipped with accessories.Tel: 96 579 5119 (Javea)

LAST MONTH’S CROSSWORD ANSWERS


Martyn’s Cryptic Xword ACROSS

7. In which one may have friends round ! (6)

8. As Nero fiddled, it makes sense (6)

9. Regretted sounding impolite (4)10. Arrests model going around

King´s Head with no clothes on (8)

11. Notices faulty component (7)13. Nabakov´s first love affected

the author´s work (5)15. King and queen about to wed (5)17. Desperate Dan’s

put in this comic ! (5,2)20. Suggest I have

to be optimistic (8)21. Hat with peak I put on (4)22. Awful scar from

gym class fight (6)23. Flies I left in jars (6)

Down

1. Tune I´m composing - waltz, maybe (6)

2. Skin complaint hypochondriac nervously includes (4)

3. One isn´t faking stress (7)4. Holiday for judge around

end of September (5)5. Behave like chicken

with champion feathers (4,4)6. Study is nothing to

shout about (6)12. Tramline fixed at depot (8)14. Try and entice at first (7)16. Expert getting about

a hundred straight away (2,4)18. Arrogant at university?

Shame (6)19. Sacked if turning socialist (5)21. Work the land - there may

be money in it (4)) SEND YOUR ANSWERS to Jávea Jeard atApartado de Correos 227, VERGEL 03770 (Alicante) orOasis Help Centre, C/. Toni Llido 5, Bajo, JAVEA 03730

A winning entry was again received from Lyn,Well done! If there is more than one correct answer, awinner will be selected ‘out-of-a-hat’.

The answers to Martyn’s Cryptic Crossword inthe October edition are printed on page 18.

November 2013, Nº 7 Jávea JeardAre you ready for

More HUMOUR?

ENTRENCHED IN POPPIES

Have you ever stood in a slit trench, stood in the pouring rain

Heard it rattling on your helmet,felt it bore into your brain?

Felt it seep inside your gas cape like rivulets of ice

Go creeping down your body to mingle with the lice?

Felt water settle in your boots, felt like a human drain

Only your comrades on the line helped to keep you sane?

Have you watched a rat go waddling by,sniffing the air

Felt somehow it was your friend, why else would it be there?

Have you watched him pause to listen and ducked because you knew

He’d heard a shell was coming much earlier than you?

Have you heard the shrapnel ringing as it flew just past your head

Have you heard a comrade scream, felt your heart fill up with dread?

One more less for them to shoot at makes you nearer to the dead

If ‘they’ had done these things and wondered just what for.

Perhaps it would make them think againbefore going off to war.

by Roger MayHayling Island

Let us remember “Those” who fought for our Freedom,

“Those who survived but wounded in body and soul.

“Those” who struggled on without their loved-one’s

“those” who are still with us,having done battle twice

for our freedom - and now refuse to eat corned beef!

LET US BE THANKFULLET US NEVER

FORGET

Never Argue with a Woman

One morning, the husband returns theboat to their lakeside cottage afterseveral hours of fishing and decides totake a nap. Although not familiar withthe lake, the wife decides to take theboat out herself.She motors out a short distance, anchors,puts her feet up, and begins to read abook. The peace and solitude aremagnificent.A Fish and Game Warden in his boatarrives. He pulls up alongside thewoman and says, 'Good morning,Ma'am. What are you doing?''Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking,'Isn't that quite obvious?')'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' heinforms her.'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. Iam reading!''Yes, but I see you have all theequipment. For all I know you couldstart at any moment. I'll have to take youin and write you up a ticket.''If you do that, I'll have to charge youwith sexual assault,' says the woman.'But I haven't even touched you,' says theGame Warden.'That's true, but you have all theequipment. For all I know you couldstart at any moment.''Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.MORAL: Never argue with a womanwho reads. It's likely she can also think.

Charlie Ade Amos

A soldier’s reasoning\General Baldwin had barely arrived inthe forward area when a sniper's bulletremoved a button from his shirt. He threwhimself to the ground in terror. The menstood around with the greatest unconcern.

The general yelled at a passingsergeant. "Hey, isn't somebody going tokill that darned sniper?"

The sergeant looked down at thegeneral and replied: "I guess not, general.We're scared that if we kill him, the enemywill replace him with somebody whoreally knows how to shoot."

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All equipment supplied with awritten guarantee.

Tel: 625 397 209

There’s a new warmth about Scallopsnew venue, situated on land between theoriginal premises and Barclays Bank.

Breakfast on the seafront premisesdid not begin until 11am and finished -quite naturally - at 1pm (time for lunch).

When Breakfast was available from9.30am, we were able to enjoy a lovelyEnglish breakfast, and still be at theOasis Help Centre for 10am opening.

It’s less convenient for me now thatthe start of breakfast has been delayeduntil 10.30 - but it’s their business, andtheir decision.

They offer some very attractive‘one-plate’ meals that include a bottle ofPepsi (or was it Coca) and have addedroast beef to the options for Sundaylunch. Free bottle of plonk and freebreakfast vouchers were an addedattraction on some menus. CR


Tuesday, stayed the night in theTravelodge and left at 11.30 the nextmorning for our drive up toFeatherstone in Yorkshire to spend timewith my sister and her husband.According to TomTom, we should havearrived at 3.30pm but it was gone 6pmwhen we finally arrived having spenttwo hours without moving in a trafficjam because a lorry had turned over andspilled its diesel out on the M1. Thatwasn't the only holdup we had, trafficjust comes to a stop for no apparentreason, then moves on at a snail's pace.When Clive was talking to a friend lateron the telephone, she said the roads arealways like that, it takes ages to getanywhere!

Yes, during the 28 years thatwe have lived in Jávea, things havechanged drastically, some for the betterand some for the worse, but thesunshine and warm weather make up forall the downside. I had a swim thisafternoon, probably the last of theseason because the water has dropped to19 degrees, but to be able to swim inNovember can't be all bad.

But I do enjoy my visits backto the UK, this last one in particular.The reason for our visit was to seefamily and friends and to attend theInstallation of Clive as the MetropolitanArchbishop of the Anglican IndepenentCommunion Worldwide.

We spent Thursday with ourgranddaughter Anna, Chris and our twogreat grandsons Cameron and Cian. Itwas a delightful day and they were allso pleased to see us. Anna (whoattended Lady Elizabeth and VicenteTena schools until taken back to the UKby her mother) had prepared amagnificent banquet of sandwiches,pork pies, sausage rolls, baked potatoeswith different fillings, savouries andcakes, and when the boys returned homefrom school we all tucked in. They are alovely family and it is obvious that theylove and miss us very much and it was awrench when it was time to saygoodbye. Anna gave us a bag she hadpacked with a variety of food and drinkfor our journey the next day.

When we left Anna's home ournext stop was the Travelodge in MiltonKeynes for the AICW ceremony whichtook place on the Saturday evening. Afriend of ours, Bruce, from Texas cameover for the ceremony and he wasInstalled as AICW Archbishop of theUnited States. Both Clive and Brucelooked very grand and relaxed. It was avery moving ceremony and we foundthe people in the church verywelcoming and friendly.

Our Nephew Dan, his wifeLorraine and two children Naomi andHannah travelled up from their home inFaringdon for the ceremony and decidedto make a holiday break in the Novotel,complete with heated swimming pool. Itwas wonderful to see them andafterwards when we all went out for acelebratory meal they presented us withpresents, chocolates, mince pies andcards. Next morning we joined them attheir hotel for a full English breakfast,before they travelled home.

Dan - like Clive - has lost a lotof weight (even more than Clive) and itis not easy for a Read to lose weight,they enjoy their food too much! Itoccurred to me as I wrote these words,that Clive has lost close to 20Kgs - theweight of the suitcase that we couldscarcely lift on to the scales. Hard toimagine - but the facts don’t lie.

Monday we left Milton Keynesand drove down to Eastbourne to see ourfriend John. We gave Bruce a lift toHeathrow on the way because he had avery early flight back the next morningand bad weather was forecast. John hadbeen our Pastor 40 years ago when welived in Mosborough on the outskirts ofSheffield. He lives in a retirement homein Eastbourne and I must say if I everhad to return to the UK for medicalreasons, I would love to live there. Hemoved there about 6 years ago with hiswife Hilda after a stroke which left himparalyzed down his left side. Sadly,Hilda died 3 years ago but John copesvery well on his own. We found him inthe lounge bowling with other residentsand after a welcome cup of tea, Johntook us back to his room for a chat.

Next morning it was lastminute shopping before our flight in theafternoon. It's always good to be away,but it's better to be back home in myown bed!

Cycling with GranddaughterOut Cycling one day with my eight-year-old granddaughter, Carolyn, I got alittle wistful. "In ten years," I said,"you'll want to be with your friends andyou won't go walking, biking, andswimming with me like you do now."

Carolyn shrugged. "In ten yearsyou'll be too old to do all those thingsanyway."

Weather ForecasterTo tell the weather, go to your back door andlook for the dog. If the dog is at the door andhe is wet, it's probably raining. But if the dogis standing there really soaking wet, it isprobably raining really hard.

If the dog's fur looks like it's been rubbedthe wrong way, it's probably windy. If thedog has snow on his back, it's probablysnowing.

Of course, to be able to tell the weatherlike this, you have to leave the dog outsideall the time, especially if you expect badweather. Sincerely, the CAT

Continued from page 16Woman to Woman

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or phone 669 386 702 (daytime)

November 2013, Nº 7 Jávea JeardJávea Jeard

about Comet ISON?Over the centuries comets have beenlabelled by many cultures as a bad signand the arrivals of these celestial bodieshave often been linked to misfortunateevents here on earth such asearthquakes, tsunamis and other naturaldisasters.

Each year short period comets, thosethat take less than 200 years to completeone orbit around the sun, do regularlypass by the earth and without issue butunfortunately most of us will never seethese objects as they are just too dim asto be seen by the unaided eye.

So, what is Comet ISON?Like all comets this celestial body issimilar in appearance to a big dirtysnowball and is made up from rockymaterial, dust, ice and frozen gases.These bodies are believed to be the leftover material from the formation of oursolar system and it is likely they residein two areas of space. The short periodcomets come from the Kuiper belt, aregion between Mars and Jupiter and thelonger period comets, those incidentallythat have an orbit period of over 200years, come from a place we call theOort cloud, although we have noevidence about the actual existence ofthe Oort cloud but we do know thatthese longer period comets do orbit farbeyond Pluto.

When a comet is nudged from itsorbit by the gravitational pull of apassing planet or star then it either fallsaway and out of our solar system foreveror heads in towards the sun. As it nearsthe sun so the head (nucleus) begins tobrighten as the frozen gases erupt intojets which form around the nucleus. Thesolar wind then stretches out these jetsto form the characteristic comet tailswhich can span into space for millionsof kilometres. The jets can also provideus with colours of green and blue hueswhich when seen in the night sky cangive the comet a ghostly appearance.

Comet ISON is now heading verynear to the sun, it has been travellingtowards the sun for the last 10,000 yearsbut was only discovered last Septemberby two astronomers who observed itusing the International Scientific OpticalNetwork (ISON), hence the comet’sname. If it survives the journey aroundthe sun then we could see a very brightand spell binding natural object in themorning and evening sky from the endof November and possibly during the

day time in December. It is said that thiscomet could become another GreatComet adding to the hall of fame alongwith other Great Comets recorded in theyears of 1680, 1744, 1843, 1882, 1910,1927, 1965, 1976 and 2007.

Providing the comet orbits the sunand does not break up, the prediction fornaked eye viewing starts on the morningof 29th November around 7:30am,looking East - South East, which is inthe direction of the rising sun. At sunsetthe comet will be seen setting in thewest and it is likely the tail of the cometmaybe viewed for a few hours aftersundown. The comet should be visiblethroughout December but will fade asthe comet heads back out into the deepfreeze of space. We should also pointout that as the comet is very near to thesun you should not use binoculars ortelescopes as you may suffer permanentdamage to your eyes.

This is Comet ISONS first encounterwith the sun and the predicted return isin 110,000 years. by Ian AmerThe photograph is an illustration of howthe comet might look over Jávea atsunset towards the end of November.

Did you hear about the doctor?During a lady's medical examination, thedoctor says:- "Your heart, lungs, pulseand blood pressure are all fine. Now letme see the bit that gets you ladies into allkinds of trouble."

The lady starts taking off her underwearbut is interrupted by the doctor.

"No! No! Don't remove your clothes...Just stick out your tongue!"

Give your car a BOOST

Unleash its true potentialFast and efficient remapping serviceIncrease BHP & torque by up to 35%Reduce fuel cost by up to 30%Good saving or your money back

also AIR-CON RECHARGEMobile Service

GARY WILLASTel: 652 196 274

If you have Scallops vouchers youare unable to use, you can leavethem in the box outside the OASISCENTRE (in C/. Toni Llido, at therear of La Caixa bank) and we willsee that their value is not wasted.

It costs you nothing to giveaway what you cannot use.

PORT APARTMENTQuality Apartment in Port,

close to sea and all amenities. Cherrywood Kitchen,

3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms,Hot/Cold Air Conditioning.

Large parking space. All year-round tenancy.

(Retired couple preferred)696 767 349and ask for JULIE

9th October awardsJávea celebrated the 775th Anniversaryof the birth of the Kingdom of Valencia- when King Jaume I of Aragon tookValencia from the Moors, with awardsto two men with overseas birthconnections. The ‘Solidarity’ award wasgiven to ISVH, a group of mostly Swissand German residents of Balcon al Marand Calpe, who wanted to ensure theirviews as owners and ratepayers were notoverlooked. One suspects that the awardwas made to reflect that the ISVH teamof volunteer firefighters is Jávea’s firstline of protection against fire. Theaward was accepted by current PresidentEric Brenner.

The award to the individual inrespect of ‘Civic Values’ was made to aSpaniard whose mother was British,Paco Reus Boyd-Swann, a philologistand professor, originally in Jávea, butnow with UNED in Denia and many ofhis students - including Mayor JoséChulvi who made the presentations -were present in a gathering thatexceeded the capacity of the CouncilChamber. It is hoped that, next year, ifthe winners are so popular, there will bea TV screen in the reception area sothose in the ‘overflow’ can see as wellas hear what is happening. CR


2014CALENDAR

So many people have asked,that we’ve decided to

publish a Jávea Views CALENDAR

featuring views of Jávea(rural, town, harbour and beach)spiral bound and ready to post.

All images by local photographers

ASK TO SEE A SAMPLEat the OASIS CENTRE

C/. Toni Llido 5(next to the Port branch of La Caixa)

6 €uros eachAll profits used for supportof the local church in Jávea

We lead where others follow

When you need domestic support- you need ShareCare

DOMESTICCompanionship and ConversationCleaning, Housework & GardeningLaundry/Ironing/ Linen ChangeShopping and Meal PlanningHelp with paperworkPhone calls in Spanish

TRANSPORTAppointments and Airport TripsLocal Shopping, ExcursionsAccompanied Visits

HOSPITALWe keep Appointments with YouBasic Care when you are in HospitalTranslation and InterpretationPost-Hospital care in your home

FAMILYMaintaining contact with familyRespite care or sitting service

HEALTHSupport to quit Smoking, eat

Healthy or Weight ManagementStress ManagementEmotional Wellbeing

SPECIALISTHealth Insurance / Funeral PlanningHousehold Insurances

Short TermLong Term

One-off CallEmergencies

WHATEVER THE CAUSEMotherhood - Bereavement- Divorce - Accident - Injury

Surgery - Serious Health Diagnosis - Debilitating Illness - LonelinessIsolation - Depression - Caring Full-time Working - Relocating

Reliable and Practical supporton a flexible,

cost-effective basis

vall Cheryl Brownon 693 551 107

[email protected]

HUGE RANGEChristmas Card Packs

10, 12, 16, 20, 30, 40cards, with envelopes

for 4€ per pack

Full range of ChristmasCards at 1€ each on display

by the end of November.Help Centre

C/. Toni Llido 5behind La Caixa

Your ONE-STOP shop in the Port

SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAYMarch 2014

30 31 1

2 3 4 5 6 7 8

9 10 11 12 13 14 15

16 17 18 19 20 21 22

23 24 25 26 27 28 29

Two BeggarsTwo beggars are sitting side by side on astreet in Rome, Italy. One has a Crossin front of him; the other one is holdingthe Star of David. Many people go by,look at both beggars, but only putmoney into the hat of the beggar sittingbehind the Cross.

The Pope comes by and stops towatch the throngs of people givingmoney to the beggar who holds theCross while none give to the beggarholding the Star of David.

Finally, the Pope approaches thebeggar with the Star of David and says"My poor fellow, don't you understand?This is a Catholic country; this city isthe Seat of Catholicism. People aren'tgoing to give you money if you sit therewith a Star of David in front of you,especially when you're sitting beside abeggar who is holding a Cross. In fact,they would probably give more moneyto him just out of spite."

The beggar with the Star of Davidlistened to the Pope, smiled, and turnedto the beggar with the Cross and said,"Moshi, look who's trying to teach theGoldstein brothers about marketing!"

Received from David and Donna

Jávea Jeard is published in Jávea by A2Z Publicaciones on behalf of Iglesia Grupo International de

Divulgación del Evangélio (CIF: Q0300542H) at OASIS Centre, C/. Toni Llido 5, Jávea 03730

Av. Jaime 1, Jávea PortJulie and Diego welcome you to

MENU DEL DÍA - 9,50€7 starters and 8 main courses

inc. drink, dessert, bread, ali oliMore than a dozen ‘one-plate’ meals

More than 50 ‘Tapas’ (prepared in-house)

SPECIALITIESPAELLA to order - tel 696 767 349

Fried and grilled mixed fish and shell fish (min order 2 people). Mixed Grilled Vegetables

English BreakfastHAMBURGERS

Take-Away Service

BAR PICOTEO

Jávea Duty Chemist 24hAntonio Marín 96 646 1954 NOV DEC

Avda. Augusta 30 (Rear of Mercadona Pla) 6,19 2,15,28Consuelo Espinós 96 579 1801

Plaza de la Iglesa 11 (Town) 7,20 3,16,29Belchi-Cholbi 96 579 1099

Ronda Colón 4 (Town) 8,21 4,17,30Amparo Marsal 96 579 1955

Avda. Juan Carlos I, 33 9,22 5,18,31Isabel Garcés 96 579 1520

C/. Sevilla 1, (Port) 10,23 6,19Paz Uriol 96 579 3839

Avenida de la Libertad (Arenal-Playa) 11,24 7,20Juanna Ripoll 97 577 0900

Ctra La Nao (Cala Blanca) 12,25 8,21Salome Martinez 96 646 2545

Avenida Lepanto 12 (Port) 13,26 9,22Rosa M aria Pérez 96 646 3531

Ctra. Cabo La Nao Pla, 126 (Arenal) 1,14,27 10,23Antonio Almodóvar 96 646 3994

Plaza Joanot Martorell 5, Av. Amanecer (Town) 2,15,28 11,24Lydia Gil 96 646 3142

Avda, Fontana 21 (Club de Tenis) 3,16,29 12,25Ana Lillo 96 646 3947

Avda. de Palmela 16 (Southern By’Pass) 4,17,30 13,26Vicente Salort 96 647 1133

Ctra la Nao Pla 165 (Barclays Roundabout 5,18 14,27We are grateful to Antonio Marín (whose premises are 80m South of the rearentrance to Mercadona) for making this information available to our readers.

Each 24h period of duty starts at 9am

By law, all workmen should be legal.Clients can be fined if illegal workers are used.

[email protected]

Javea jeard nov 2013

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