Writing Quotations for Press Releases 202

The Advanced Class

Writing Quotes for Press Releases 202The Advanced Class

“Sure, your quotes for press releases are fine now.”

Writing Quotes for Press Releases 202The Advanced Class

“But couldn’t you do better?”

You’re fine if

Clients approve your quotes

You’re advanced if

Reporters use your quotes

There are four kinds of quotes

1. Bricks2. Nibbles3. Sound bites4. Kickers

Let’s look at the first two …

6 quotes thick as bricks (average 80 words per quotation)

"Pepsi is actually going to install two new 'runways' inside of Terminal B and C to allow our youngest passengers a chance to take off," said Ken Buchanan, executive vice president of revenue management. "Where other airports have had to put their own money on the table to build the play areas, DFW has been able to negotiate the use of the play areas through our sponsorship deal with The Pepsi Bottling Group.“

John T. Cahill, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of PBG, said, "PBG's story in 2005 was about robust top line growth in all of our major territories and the successful navigation of a challenging cost environment. Our teams around the world remained focused on our goals and closed out the year beating many of those objectives. Innovation in the U.S. and several countries in Europe helped us drive excitement in the category and volume growth for PBG. Our non-carbonated portfolio in each of our territories performed well, contributing to our strong volume growth. The U.S. pricing environment proved to be favorable throughout the year and this continues into 2006. Finally, in Mexico, our top line continued to move upward, though profit growth was below our expectations."

“For bacteria, a desk is really the laptop of luxury,” said Gerba. “They can feast all day from breakfast to lunch and even dinner.” Gerba and his researchers found that unless desks were wiped clean with a disinfectant during the day, bacteria levels climbed higher and higher, peaking after lunch.

“We don’t think twice about eating at our desks, even though the average desk has 100 times more bacteria than a kitchen table and 400 times more bacteria than the average toilet,” Gerba said. “Without cleaning, a small area on your desk or phone can sustain millions of bacteria that could potentially cause illness.”

"Xerox has melded people, process and technology to create an integrated solution," said Susie Beattie, vice president, Midwest regional office within Xerox's U.S. Solutions Group. "At the end of the day, the ultimate winners are the students, who will benefit from having more quality time with their teachers.“

"The soldiers risk their lives for our freedom, so the drawings are only a small way for the children to show their appreciation to the troops and their families," said Steve Davidson, senior vice president of operations, The Boys & Girls Clubs of Scottsdale. "As an organization we felt it was an important subject for our kids to understand."

6 petite nibbles (average 18 words each)

“When it’s hitting the fan, you don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to fire

back.”

“I prefer to think of myself as keeper of

the flame, rather than just as the last

unicorn.”

“If you’re paying out of pocket, you’ll hunt

for bargains.”

“A man’s farm burns down, you can replace it with

donated labor in an afternoon. You can’t

do that with a hospital bill.”

“The baton of global consumption is being passed from the U.S. consumer base to the millions of consumers

in developing nations.”

“Everybody from America, please, look

at the map.”

What’s the difference?

The bricks came from corporate press releases

The nibbles came from

the Wall Street

Journal

Corporate v. Newspaper

"Pepsi is actually going to install two new 'runways' inside of Terminal B and C to allow our youngest passengers a chance to take off. Where other airports have had to put their own money on the table to build the play areas, DFW has been able to negotiate the use of the play areas through our sponsorship deal with The Pepsi Bottling Group.“ (64 words)

“When it’s hitting the fan, you don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to fire back.” (17 words)

I’m not saying …

… be like the Wall Street Journal… write quotes your client won’t approve… be colorful and snappy… write sound bites instead of quotes

Rather, just be aware of the gap

… and step out a little farther!

Here’s how

1. Reduce word count (10 words per sentence, not 30)

2. Add opinion or interpretation3. Be “surprised that …”4. Answer these questions:

Why this? Why now?5. Include customer PDAs (problems, decisions, actions)

Example No. 3

“The wireless attacks (customer PDA) we saw—jamming, de-authentication, denial-of-service, MAC spoofing, fake and soft APs—were to be expected, particularly at a hacker conference. We were more surprised to find that an abundance of Bluetooth devices, microwave ovens, 802.11 frequency-hopping devices and Web cameras were more effective at knocking out the conference’s wireless network (customer PDA).”

• … Bruce Hubbert, an AirMagnet engineer who attended DefCon, said in a company statement.•Mobile Pipeline , Aug. 2, 2005, http://www.informationweek.com/story/showArticle.jhtml?articleID=167100068

Sure, include messaging

But blend it with …

1. Reduced word count (10 words per sentence, not 30)

2. Opinion or interpretation3. Surprise (either the reader’s or the speaker’s – either OK)

4. Answers to these questions:• Why this? • Why now?

5. Customer PDAs (problems, decisions, actions)

Now, a word about what to avoid

“We are pleased to announce our mission to acquire the ‘laser’ and hold the world ransom for one mmmillllion dollars,’’ said Doctor Evil, founder and chief executive officer of Evil Inc. “This will demonstrate our commitment to robust, scalable, best-of-breed tyranny.”

Avoid “delighted/pleased/excited/proud to ….”

Why?• It has no news value.• It has no business value.• It doesn’t add insight or understanding.• It doesn’t advance the story.

A publication that would include a quote like this is probably not influential.

Only add value

Your speaker must advance the story or

remain silent.

Check yourself

If the sentences below are true, you’re in good shape. If not, try again. Your quote could be stronger.

1. If I delete this quote, the reader won’t be able to understand the significance or context of the news.

2. If I delete this quote, I’ll have to re-write other parts of the release to restore lost info and insight.

Now, back to the other two types

1. Bricks2. Nibbles3. Sound bites4. Kickers

Best image to remember & repeat

A sound bite is short enough and colorful enough to be repeated word for word when telling a friend what someone said.

• TV• Radio• Conversation

A kicker is like a sound bite but is the last sentence in a print news story. It’s the best or second-best quote in an interview.

• Like an echo• Lingers in memory• Brings story full circle

To write one…

• Emphasize one or more of the five senses• Use a metaphor, simile or analogy• Sum up the entire topic in 10 words

At the very least ….

“Go down the middle,” CEO John Smith said. “Write something people will

remember and repeat.”

“Voluptatem au dantium totam rem aperiam, eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis.”

“Ut enim ad minima veniam

quis nostrum exercitationem ullam corporis.”

(BTW, that was a kicker. Did you notice?)