Grief and Loss Handbook - Lake .Grief and Loss Handbook Lake County School Board Susan Moxley,...

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Transcript of Grief and Loss Handbook - Lake .Grief and Loss Handbook Lake County School Board Susan Moxley,...

  • Grief and Loss Handbook

    Lake County School Board

    Susan Moxley, Ed.D.

    Superintendent

    Jay Marshall

    Director, Student Services

    Jan Tobias

    Administrative Coordinator, Student Services

    Mary Minich

    Program Specialist, Student Services

    Linda Wice, Ed.S., NCSP

    School Psychologist

    August, 2010

    Student Services

    512 South Palm Avenue

    Howey-in-the-Hills, FL 34737

  • 2

    TABLE OF CONTENTS

    TABLE OF CONTENTS ................................................................................................... 2

    INTRODUCTION............................................................................................................... 6

    A FRAMEWORK FOR GRIEF AND LOSS COUNSELING ....................................... 6

    CRISIS, TRAUMATIC EVENT, POST TRAUMATIC STRESS, DEATH,

    BEREAVEMENT, AND GRIEF ....................................................................................... 7

    Crisis ............................................................................................................................... ..7

    Traumatic Event .................................................................................................................... 8

    Post-Traumatic Stress ........................................................................................................... 8

    Death ..................................................................................................................................... 9

    Bereavement ......................................................................................................................... 9

    Grief ...................................................................................................................................... 9

    DEVELOPMENTAL STAGES OF GRIEF ..................................................................... 9

    Infancy .................................................................................................................................. 9

    Pre-School Age (2 to 5 Years) ........................................................................................ 10

    School Age .......................................................................................................................... 10

    FIVE EMOTIONS THROUGH WHICH PEOPLE MAY PASS WHEN

    CONFRONTED WITH DEATH .................................................................................... 11

    Elisabeth Kbler-Ross - Framework of Grief ..................................................................... 12

    GUIDELINES FOR HELPING SOMEONE WHO IS GRIEVING ........................... 14

    How to Converse/Comfort Grieving People ....................................................................... 14

    How to Comfort Children Who Grieve .............................................................................. 15

  • 3

    Emotional First-Aid ............................................................................................................ 15

    STUDENTS WHO ARE CONSIDERED HIGH-RISK FOR

    COMPLICATED GRIEF ................................................................................................ 16

    Problematic Expressions of Grief ....................................................................................... 16

    Factors Which Indicate High-Risk for Complicated Grief ............................................. 16

    WORKING WITH THE MEDIA ................................................................................... 17

    CAMPUS SECURITY ...................................................................................................... 19

    EMERGENCY CHECKOUT PLAN .............................................................................. 19

    PRINCIPALS ROLE ...................................................................................................... 19

    Pre-Planning Phase ............................................................................................................. 20

    Protocol Implementation (Crisis has occurred) .................................................................. 20

    Post Implementation Follow-up .......................................................................................... 24

    ROLE OF THE CRISIS MANAGEMENT TEAM LEADER AND OTHER

    TEAM MEMBERS ........................................................................................................... 24

    GUIDANCE AND ITINERANT STAFF ROLES ......................................................... 25

    TEACHERS ROLE ......................................................................................................... 27

    ROLE OF CLASSIFIED STAFF .................................................................................... 29

    PARENT COMMUNICATIONS .................................................................................... 30

    Guidelines for Parent Communications by Phone .............................................................. 30

    Guidelines for Parent Communications in Writing ............................................................ 30

    Guidelines for Parent Meetings .......................................................................................... 30

    COPING WITH A SUICIDAL DEATH......................................................................... 31

    A Parents Perspective Following the Suicide of Their Son............................................... 32

  • 4

    GRIEF SUPPORT GROUPS........................................................................................... 34

    Some Ideas/Suggestions...................................................................................................... 34

    Parent Referrals for Counseling .......................................................................................... 35

    FUNERAL SERVICES AND MEMORIALS ................................................................ 35

    Guidelines Regarding the Funeral ...................................................................................... 35

    APPENDIX A: REPRODUCIBLE HANDOUT FOR TEACHERS............................ 37

    Helping Your Students Deal with Grief and Loss .............................................................. 37

    Teachers' Role ................................................................................................................. 37

    Specific Information for Elementary Teachers ................................................................... 38

    APPENDIX B: CLASSROOM ACTIVITIES HANDOUT .......................................... 39

    Activities for Children by Age ............................................................................................ 39

    Birth to 2 years ................................................................................................................ 39

    Preschool and Kindergarten ............................................................................................ 39

    School Age (7 to 12 years).............................................................................................. 39

    Middle School to High School (12 to 18 years) ............................................................. 39

    Other Ways of Expressing Loss .......................................................................................... 39

    APPENDIX C: SAMPLE LETTERS, MEMORANDUMS, AND NOTICES ............ 40

    Letters to Parents................................................................................................................. 40

    Sample A: General .......................................................................................................... 40

    Sample B: General .......................................................................................................... 41

    Sample C: Death by Suicide, Homicide, or Tragic Accident ......................................... 42

    Memoranda to Faculty ........................................................................................................ 43

    Sample A: Announcing a Suspected, but Unconfirmed, Death by Suicide .................... 43

    Sample B: Announcing a Death by Suicide that Occurred Over the Summer

    Break ............................................................................................................................... 44

    Sample C: Announcing an Accidental Death ................................................................. 45

    Sample D: Announcing the Death of a Teacher to Students .......................................... 46

    Notices ................................................................................................................................ 47

    Sample A: Announcing a Death by Suicide to the Student Body................................... 47

    Sample B: Postvention Counseling Group ..................................................................... 48

  • 5

    APPENDIX D: REPRODUCIBLE STAFF CHECKLISTS ......................................... 49

    D1: Principal Checklist ....................................................................................................... 49

    D2: Crisis Management Team Leader Checklist ................................................................ 51

    D3: Guidance and Itinerant Staff Checklist ........................................................................ 52

    D4: Teacher Checklist............................................