Grief: Additional Web Resources Grief & Transition ... Getting Past Your Breakup: Loss into the Best

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  • 996 North Broad Street

    Globe, Arizona 85501

    O: 928-425-2185

    F: 520-586-6129

    S o u t h e a s t e r n A r i z o n a B e h a v i o r a l

    Heal th Serv ices Inc .

    Grief: Additional Web Resources

    “Loss” By Marten Jansen

    Grief in the Workplace: How to Help Co-Workers

    The Grief Digest published an article in

    January of this year titled, “Grief in the

    Workplace.” The article was written by

    Jan Borgman who is a licensed social

    worker residing in Cincinnati, Ohio.

    It is my hope that by reading the article

    we’ll begin the discussion on how we can

    find balance with giving compassion to

    the bereaved employees while ensuring

    that the work is being completed and

    also learning how to offer support to the

    grieving person instead of avoiding grief.

    “It’s just a job, a place I go to for 8 hours

    a day.” For many people, their job is just

    a part of their daily lives that provides a

    means to other things–food, clothing,

    shelter, security, etc. It’s just a part of the

    day and it starts and ends at a certain

    time. But those who are laboring through

    a grief experience, it isn’t just a job that

    lasts for 8 hours a day. For most grieving

    persons, grief is a 24/7 experience. Many

    people who have experienced the death

    of a loved one will state “I never knew

    grief was so hard. It’s the hardest job I’ve

    ever had to do.”

    Most workplaces are not prepared to

    handle the impact of grief on its employ-

    ees. While grief initially diminishes your

    ability to think clearly, zaps your energy,

    creativity and motivation, and may lead

    you to feel depressed and overwhelmed,

    grief will ease with time. At some point

    your ability to make decisions with rela-

    tive ease will return. As you work through

    your grief, the energy level will eventually

    return. As you learn to channel your en-

    ergy and feelings in new ways, your cre-

    ativity and motivation will return. But it

    takes time. Grief is hard work and a

    “quick fix” society isn’t used to giving the

    time or support needed to work through

    the various stages and feelings related to


    Continued to Pages 2 and 3

    this issue

    Grief in Your Work Environment P.1

    Feelings When Mourning P.2

    Grief and Loss Q & A P.3

    Some Web Resources P.4

    ISS UE

    Autumn 2014


    SEABHS Grief & Transition Newsletter Issue 01 Autumn 2014

    Grief & Transition newsletter



    BOOK LIST Please find some books

    below to motivate and

    assist people dealing with

    a relationship break-up.

    Getting Past Your Breakup:

    How to Turn a Devastating

    Loss into the Best Thing

    That Ever Happened to You

    By Susan J. Elliott

    The Journey from Aban-

    donment to Healing: Turn

    the End of a Relationship

    into the Beginning of a New

    Life By Susan Anderson

    Rebuilding: When Your

    Relationship Ends By Bruce


    Coming Apart: Why Rela-

    tionships End and How to

    Live Through the Ending of

    Yours By Daphne Rose


    Trading Dead-End Rela-

    tionships for Lasting Love

    By Willard F. Jr. Harley

    How to Mend Your Broken

    Heart: Overcome Emotional

    Pain at the End of a Rela-

    tionship By Paul Mckenna

    & Hugh Willbourn

    Thriving After Divorce:

    Transforming Your Life

    When a Relationship Ends

    By Tonja Evetts Weimer

    Love Hangover: Moving

    from Pain to Purpose After

    a Relationship Ends By

    Shewanda Riley & Ger-

    maine Hawkins

    Wendy Reid, MSW, LMSW

    Grief & Loss Therapist

    C: 928-200-5697

    B y S

    te fa

    n K

    ri k

    Grief Net: ( An email based support group for all kinds of grief,

    loss of spouse, child, partner, parent, etc. Groups are separated by type of loss, specific

    groups just for kids as well. Cost is $10 a month to join a group. All discussions are


    Kids Aid: ( A companion site to grief net for children. Also provides

    an email based group to join. Groups are separated by age, 12 and under and 13 to 18.

    Site provides kids a place to submit artwork and writings, as well as a posting board to

    have your questions answered.

    The Dougy Center: ( A place for children, teens, adults and fami-

    lies to share their experiences with grief. List of books, DVDs and training opportuni-


    Grief Recovery Online (GROWW): ( Grief chat room organized

    into different branches for specific losses. Designed to have an opportunity to talk 24

    hours a day, 7 days a week.

    These resource websites were found on: For local Tucson grief

    resources, articles addressing coping skills to manage grief symptoms as well as depression, causes and

    symptoms associated with grieving, and much more please visit this website.

  • Grief Within the Work Environment….

    It doesn’t matter if the loss

    was the death of a loved

    one, friend, or co-worker

    the loss must be

    experienced. Each person

    must grieve the loss of the

    person who was important

    in their life. And grief is

    harder than most people

    realize until they experience

    a significant loss or the

    death of a loved one. Grief

    can’t be turned off and on

    based on a work schedule.

    Grief comes with the person

    who is grieving wherever

    they go, including the work-


    How to Help Some-

    one Who Is Grieving

    There is no simple answer

    on how to help someone

    who is grieving. Each per-

    son grieves in their own

    way. The relationship you

    share with the person who

    is grieving may determine

    the type of assistance you

    feel you can offer. Here are

    a few suggestions that may

    It doesn’t matter if the loss

    was the death of a loved one,

    friend, or co-worker the loss

    must be experienced.

    List of Feelings You May Have When Mourning

     Afraid

     Angry

     Anxious

     Ashamed

     Bitter

     Confused

     Depressed

     Despairing

     Detached

     Guilty

     Helpless

     Hopeless

     Lonely

     Lost

     Numb

     Sad

     Shocked

     Overwhelmed

     Preoccupied

     Vulnerable

     Yearning

    Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep Poem by Mary Frye

    Do not stand at my

    grave and weep,

    I am not there, I do not


    I am a thousand winds

    that blow.

    I am the diamond glint

    on snow.

    I am the sunlight on

    ripened grain.

    I am the gentle autumn


    When you wake in the

    morning hush,

    I am the swift, uplifting


    Of quiet birds in cir-

    cling flight.

    I am the soft starlight at


    Do not stand at my

    grave and weep.

    I am not there, I do not


    Do not stand at my

    grave and cry.

    I am not there, I did not

    die! Mary Frye (1932)

    be helpful:

    If It’s a Co-worker Who Is Grieving: 1) Talk to them. Don’t be

    afraid to acknowledge their

    loss. Ask them how they

    are doing. Allow them to

    share what they feel com-

    fortable with. Don’t force

    them to talk about

    the death or their

    loss. It may help

    them feel more at

    ease if you bring up

    their loss rather

    than ignore it. The grieving

    person’s world has been

    turned “upside down” and

    there is nothing that is nor-

    mal for them at this time.

    2) Don’t be afraid to include

    them in activities and pro-

    jects. If they don’t want to

    participate at this time, it

    doesn’t mean that they

    won’t want to join in the

    next time. Today may be a

    difficult day for them, but

    that doesn’t mean they

    don’t want to be included in

    future activities.

    3) Don’t force them into a

    social activity that they don’t

    want to join in at this time.

    Grief is hard work and they

    may not be able to enjoy

    the event or activity at this

    time. If is not unusual for

    friends to want to make

    them “feel better” but it is

    important to respect their

    decisions. Their