2019

FROM L I S A MCCROHAN

© Lisa McCrohan 2

Hello! .......................................................................... 3

Practices to Nourish You .......................................... 4

Practices to Nourish Your Relationships ............... 10

Practices to Nourish Your Leadership and Work. 15

Want More? Dig Deeper! ....................................... 22

THE INVITATION by Lisa McCrohan

There is a sacred moment

right now when you awaken,

you open your eyes, and you can answer “yes” to

the invitat ion of your soul to freely be who you are,

as you are, standing or dancing

in your power. Because today,

today, you are honoring your truest self.

You are answering the cal l to l ive and speak and love

as your soul speaks to you. And this is freedom.

•••

© Lisa McCrohan 3

I am delighted to share these practices with you and inspire you to rise into

your authentic presence and thrive—in love, life, work, and play. This is my

gift to you and I wanted it to be simple yet comprehensive. You can do

these! I have developed these mind-body-spirit practices based on my

expertise and experience helping hundreds of clients to get unstuck, make

big changes, and figure out how to live a life they love. These practices are

doable and you can start using them today!

While these practices are lovely, please DO NOT try them all at once! Pick

one that really resonates with you. Write it down. Place it where you will

see it often. Share which one you are working on with a friend. Claim it and

make it your own. And soon, you’ll notice a change happening.

I would love to hear which practice you are starting with!

I look forward to helping you rise and thrive with authenticity, soul-

confidence, and grace.

Blessings,

Lisa MA, LCSW-C, SEP

Somatic Experiencing Psychotherapist, Integrative Coach, Author

© Lisa McCrohan 4

“…the truth is each of us has an inner v ibrancy that has

been dulled by the pace at which we go about our days. The

truth is we need to pause in order for th is inner v ibrancy to

shine once again. Our spir its need spaciousness to breathe.

And it begins with a radica l, countercultural commitment to

deeply nourish yourself .”

- L isa McCrohan, Gems of Delight

These practices are all about taking care of YOU – your mind, body, soul,

and energy – so you embody your inner vibrancy and authenticity.

DROP MULTI-PRESENCING In our digital, always-on world, this is a big one! Multi-presencing is a term I

created that describes how we try to be present to way too many people

and situations at one time. We all know these moments – when you are on

your phone as well as trying to respond to an email, cook dinner, pay

attention to the child showing you her latest gymnastics flip. We are

splintering focus and it depletes our energy and half-asses our efforts!

(Let’s be honest.)

How to combat this? To start, let’s get you feeling good about how you are

living. We will reclaim your time, attention, and energy! Your brain and

nervous system will thank you. You’ll be less stressed, more focused, and

more grounded. Deciding to drop “multi-presencing” is a choice resulting in

less guilt and more joy. (More on that here.)

© Lisa McCrohan 5

When I stop trying to multi-presence, I feel a lot less guilt because when I

am present with my family, I am present with my family! And when I am

working, I am working. It takes a lot less energy to be present to just one

person, task, or situation.

Try this: Go Zen

In any moment, decide what you are doing and be present to JUST

THAT. When you are doing the dishes, just do the dishes! When you are at

your child’s soccer game, just watch the soccer game (don’t fool yourself

with “just this one peak at social media!”). When you are at the computer

working on a PowerPoint presentation, set a timer for half an hour and just

work on that (don’t check your email or text messages).

“The most precious g ift we can offer others is our

presence. When mindfulness embraces those we love, they

will b loom l ike f lowers .”

- Thich Nhat Hanh

FIGURE OUT WHAT’S MOST SACRED TO YOU Okay, this is a biggie! We don’t go people, “What’s most sacred to you?”

Yet, in my years working with hundreds of clients, I have found that this

question is the foundation for creating a life you love. Living your response

is how you rise with an incredible authentic, embodied power and thrive in

your everyday life. “Sacred” means something that you cherish, something

that is precious, and is what connects you to who you truly are, what your

purpose is for being here, and something bigger than yourself.

© Lisa McCrohan 6

There are hundreds of “pings and dings” that vie for your attention all day.

They can pull you into their abyss. And they can pull you away from what is

most sacred to you. Instead, root yourself in what is sacred to you.

This is how I live my life. I literally ask myself, “What’s most sacred to me?”

And my husband, Brian, and I do this together as a family. All of our

decisions are based around our answers to that question. That means we

have turned down great professional offers because we are committed to

something else besides money or influence. And I don’t regret it. In a world

that will pull us in every direction but into our own hearts and values,

basing your life on what is most sacred to you is a way for you to stay

anchored and living according to your truth. Try it. It’s empowering and

freeing.

Try this: Know how you want to feel.

In integrative coaching, you and I can create the space to discern what is

sacred to you and build a life at home and professional around that. What

you can do today is start by asking yourself, “How do I want to feel?”

How you want to feel goes deeper than the fleeting nature of emotions. It’s

an inner state. A soul-desire. It’s what ignites our soul. It gets at the heart

of what is sacred to you. And it helps you create a vision for the life you

love.

Let’s do it. If you aren’t reading this on actual paper, at least print the next

page… go on, I’ll wait!

© Lisa McCrohan 7

HOW DO YOU WANT TO FEEL? 1. Set a timer for 20 minutes.

2. Focus on one thing: tuning into how you want to feel in your life.

3. Circle the ones that resonate with you. Feel free to make up your

own.

Abundant Empowered Liberated Unburdened

Adventurous Enchanted Light Unstoppable

Aligned Energized Light-hearted Vibrant

Alive Fearless Loving Vivacious

Authentic Fierce Luminous Well-rested

Awe Flourishing Masterful Thriving

Balanced Focused Nourished Triumphant

Beautiful Forgiving Peaceful Unburdened

Bold Free Playful Unstoppable

Brave Grateful Powerful Vibrant

Brilliant Grounded Present Vivacious

Calm Happy Radiant Well-rested

Cherished Healthy Replenished Whole

Compassionate Hopeful Rooted Whole-hearted

Confident I matter Safe Wise

Connected In the flow Secure Worthy

Content Included Sensuous Zestful

Courageous Influential Striking _______________

Creative Inspired Strong _______________

Delighted Intentional Supported _______________

Ease Invigorated Thriving _______________

Eloquent Joyful Triumphant _______________

4. Looking at what you’ve circled, which three or four really speak to

you?

5. Write down your words. Let them be the first thing you look at when

you wake up. Let them be the last thing you look at before you go to

bed.

© Lisa McCrohan 8

IN HER WORDS Here’s how a few of my coaching clients (and I) want to feel:

Jenni’s soul words: supported, in the flow, confident

Kim’s soul words: inspired, present

Ashley’s soul words: strong, confident, like I matter

My soul words: in the flow, at ease, radiant

EACH MOMENT by Lisa McCrohan

I am waking up each day and

I am choosing to l ive in a way that honors my heart, body and spirit .

I am choosing joy. I am choosing to believe that

such a divine vastness is inside of me and I can l ive from this space

moment by moment in my everyday l i fe.

•••

© Lisa McCrohan 9

ACT LIKE YOU ARE WORTH REGARDING! Even if you are holding onto some old belief about not being “good” or

“enough” or “worthy” of self-love, just start acting like you are. While you

and I can create the space for some big changes to happen in integrative

coaching, begin to practice treating yourself with regard. You’ll notice that

you actually start believing it – enough to keep going! Fake it til you make

it, right?!

Try this: Go back to the basics with a small “win”

• Select ONE basic: good sleep, sufficient water, nourishing food, or

energizing exercise.

• Identify ONE small change, like: eat one extra serving of veggies each

day, or go for a walk during your lunch break (and actually take a

lunch break!).

• Do it for FIVE days. And start ACTING like you are worthy of such

self-care.

Your brain loves little wins. And your body loves the regard!

“A woman in harmony with her spir it is l ike a r iver

f lowing. She goes where she wi l l without pretense and

arr ives at her destinat ion prepared to be herself and only

herself .”

- Maya Angelou

© Lisa McCrohan 10

HERE (excerpt) by Lisa McCrohan

Linger here in this f leeting,

fragile, miraculous moment – holy

just as it is .

•••

Whether you are looking to reconnect with your spouse, parent with

compassion and presence, or support your teen in making wise choices,

these practices will get you started!

LOVE LISTS As I wrote in Gems of Delight, in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it

can be easy to let our relationship with our partner go by the wayside.

With little time to reconnect or reconcile, we can lose a month, a year, or

even a lifetime to our ‘default stress mode’ instead of our ‘I love you’

mode…it happens slowly over time. The daily stress and overwhelm

become our daily habit. We can start to point out the negative in our

spouses – a lot. We can start to blame and turn away from them.

That’s what happened to me. I was running on empty, caring for everyone

else, and I started to blame my husband, Brian. One night as we were

getting ready for bed, I couldn’t find the pullups for my daughter. I let out a

big sigh and then said, “Brian, where are the pullups?! How come I have to

© Lisa McCrohan 11

be the only one around here who keeps things organized?!” And then I

heard my two year old say, “Yah, Bwwwian!” And I stopped in my tracks.

That sounded like me. Nooooo! The very next day, I started to make some

big changes. One of those changes was starting to write Love Lists.

Love Lists is a sweet and doable way to reconnect and heal your

relationship with your spouse or someone who is dear to you. It can help

you to notice the good again. And it can heal bitterness, disconnect, and

hurt. Big changes start with small moments of appreciation.

Over a period of just a few days, I started to see big changes in how I saw

and regarded my husband. I started to remember my deep appreciation for

him. I began to see us as “on the same team” once again. And I started to

hear the kindness in my voice again – and so did my family.

Try this: 7 Days of love lists

Pick a person you want to feel closer to – your partner, child, parent, or

sibling. For seven days, write a list each morning or evening of things you

appreciate about your dear one. At first you may not feel like it. But do it

anyway. You are changing up old habits of how you see your dear one and

opening your eyes and heart to seeing him or her anew. It doesn’t have to

be a long list. Just look at your dear one with kinder eyes and look for what

you appreciate. And after seven days, notice what’s different about you

and how you relate to your dear one. Maybe you’ll want to keep doing this

for a whole month!

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and

f ind al l the barr iers within yourself that you ha ve bui lt

against it .”

- Rumi

© Lisa McCrohan 12

TEACH YOUR CHILD TO REGARD THEMSELVES If there is one important area that I wish all parents would put time and

attention into it is this. I see way too many adults who either have a non-

existent relationship with their bodies or one that is filled with a lot of

animosity. No wonder! Our bodies have been hurt, violated, stressed,

pushed to the max, ignored, or mistreated. It’s time we listen to our bodies.

As a trauma-informed and Somatic Experiencing practitioner, clients ask me

how to help their children love their bodies so that their children don’t

have the same struggles they have had with their own bodies. They want to

prevent their children from experiencing trauma and feeling ashamed of

their bodies. They want to know how to raise children who are confident,

love their bodies, and respect other people’s bodies. And, to be honest, we

all want to prevent our children from experiencing sexual trauma. (Yes, this

is getting serious now.)

Try this: Practice regard

No matter the age of your child, you can support your child being a

confident, resilient, and compassionate (to self and others) person by

choosing to look at, talk to, and be with your child.

When my children were young, I ASKED if they wanted to give a hug “hello”

or “goodbye” – even to family members. This upset some people. Tough.

My children could be polite and say “hello” or “goodbye,” but they did not

have to give a hug. When my children are wrestling, we have a rule: the

moment you hear, “Stop” or “no” – you stop. Immediately. Can you see

down the road where you’d want your child to A) feel like he or she can say

“Stop!” or “No!” and expect to be listened to, and B) he or she would hear

another person saying to stop, and they would regard that?

© Lisa McCrohan 13

Here are two articles I wrote for Upworthy that can be helpful to you in

showing your children how to regard their bodies and other people’s

bodies as well. Check out How to teach kids to Love and Respect Their

Bodies in 8 Steps and 5 Everyday Ways to Teach Your Kids About Consent.

TODAY by Lisa McCrohan

Today I vow to be kind with my words,

Gentle with my touch And compassionate with my presence.

•••

GUIDE YOUR TEEN TO BE A COMPASSIONATE LEADER As my children get older, I am conscious of raising children who are

compassionate leaders. I’m helping to instill in them the qualities necessary

to lead with resiliency, empathy, emotional intelligence, and compassion.

And I am helping them find their anchor – their meaning and purpose -- in

the midst of myriad distractions all vying for their attention.

All of our children are the future leaders of the world. This next generation

of leaders is inclusive. They are what William Damon, the director of the

Stanford Center on Adolescence, defines as “the purposeful.”

They are focused. They have incredible ideas. They believe in unity. And

they know how to utilize technology to make their voices heard. They are

purposefully stepping up as the next generation of compassionate leaders.

According to Damon’s research, extremely purposeful students exhibit high

degrees of persistence, resourcefulness, resilience, and capacity for healthy

risk-taking.

© Lisa McCrohan 14

How do we instill in our children a sense of hope, build resiliency, and help

them develop skills to make wise, compassionate choices?

Try this: Say: “You belong. You matter. You are loved.”

The greatest message I seek to send to my children is that they belong, they

matter, and they are loved – AND – to see others as belonging, mattering,

and loved. From toddlers to teens, our children need to feel like they

belong, they matter, and they are loved. Our children will confront bullying,

being left out, not making the team, and not feeling loved and seen. It’s

going to happen. It breaks our hearts, doesn’t it? But there is so much we

can do to help our children see their goodness and find the resiliency within

them.

You can communicate this message in small moments in your daily

interactions with your child. Be their sanctuary in a harsh world. Be the

space that loves them as they are and sees them.

Do you have a teenager? Here is an article I wrote just for you originally

published on the Gottman Institute, Empower our teens to be

compassionate leaders.

How about talking to our children about how they can be a source of

encouragement to their classmates? Here’s a post, Messages of

compassion our children can give to their classmates.

© Lisa McCrohan 15

“The ‘r ight effort ’ feels l ike the place where Grace and I

meet and we f low. That feels e mpowering and l iberating. I

have seen how ‘ r ight effort’ takes intent ion, discip l ine, and

also kindness.”

- L isa McCrohan, Gems of Delight .

I’ve selected practices for you that will help you to rise into your power

with soul-confidence, find a work-life blend of “right effort” that resonates

with you, and lead with authenticity.

DON’T GIVE AWAY YOUR POWER! Awhile back, I noticed I had slowly dropped my morning habit of quietly

journaling, getting grounded, and setting my intention for the day. Instead,

I started to work right away. And how did that happen? I started to keep

my smart phone on my nightstand! What a slippery slope!

“Don’t give away your power f irst th ing in the morning to

the pressure of productiv ity. Those f irst moments in the

morning when you wake up are sacred.”

- L isa McCrohan

© Lisa McCrohan 16

I get it. You have a busy schedule. There are multiple demands on your time

and energy. It would be easy to wake up, roll over to pick up your smart

phone on your nightstand, and begin to work. But here’s the thing – those

first few moments in the morning when you wake up are sacred. Don’t give

them away to the pressure of productivity. Instead, reclaim those first few

moments of your day.

Try this: start your morning like a wise CEO

A wise (effective, centered) CEO decides how she wants to start her day.

Don’t give away those first few sacred moments to email or social media!

Decide how you want to rise. For me, that meant not putting my smart

phone on my nightstand. Instead, I put it in another room. And it meant

waking up and going back to my life-nourishing routine of journaling and

being in the quiet for a few minutes. And now that I’ve reclaimed that

habit, I am more centered and focused. I feel more “in my power” and

ready to greet my family.

Decide how you want to rise. Need some ideas to build a new morning

habit? Check out my post, Start Your Morning Like a Wise CEO.

“If today were the last day of my l ife, would I want to do

what I am about to do today?’ And whenever the answer

has been ‘No’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to

change something.”

- Steve Jobs

© Lisa McCrohan 17

SET BOUNDARIES THAT PROTECT YOUR ENERGY AND EMPOWER YOU In order to rise, thrive, and share your genius, talents, light, and charisma,

it’s essential to strengthen your ability to set healthy boundaries. When you

set healthy boundaries at work and home, you embody your feminine

power, deepen your self-confidence, and simplify your life – which leads to

you and your creativity flourishing. Others regard you because you regard

yourself.

Try this: Sit before you commit

Just about everyone who has worked with me in coaching has heard this

mantra I use in personal and professional settings: before I say “yes” to a

commitment, I first say, “Let me sit with that.”

If you are a people-pleaser, an empath, or you can get easily sucked into a

commitment, “sit before you commit” buys you some time to discern

whether that offer depletes or serves you. Don’t commit on the spot.

Instead say, “Let me sit with that!” If the other person tries to talk you into

it, just keep repeating your new mantra!

© Lisa McCrohan 18

“When we DO establish and honor healthy boundaries

which inc lude self -care, we l iteral ly carry ourselves

differently. We begin to stand tal ler. Our voices carry more

confidence. We stand by our convict ions and we learn to

trust in ourselves. We keep our interact ions with others

clear. We practice radical self -responsib i l ity, meaning, we

don’t wait for others at home or work to identify what we

need and care for us – we take responsib i l ity for naming

what we need, claiming our self -worth, and communicating

with our famil ies and col leagues in ways that are self -

regarding.”

-L isa McCrohan, From: Four Essent ia l Ways Wise Women

Set Health ier Boundar ies

WORK IN YOUR ZONE OF GENIUS There are some things I am excellent at, but I don’t enjoy doing. They are

things that people might call on me to do because they regard me as being

excellent at it, but I don’t enjoy it. Let’s take couples therapy. I’m excellent

at helping people’s relationships to flourish with compassionate

communication and healing our old wounds that we bring into our

partnerships (we ALL have them and we all bring them!). BUT, I really do

not enjoy doing couples therapy.

What am I excellent at and also enjoy doing? Writing authentically to bring

the sacred into our everyday lives, holding space for individuals in coaching

and therapy to clear out what is holding them back from living in a way that

is most sacred to them, and teaching. Ohhh how I love to stand in front of

an audience and inspire.

You may be excellent at something but not love it. That’s not your zone of

genius. And too often we get trapped in jobs or tasks that we are excellent

at, but don’t love it. This is a big energy-drainer.

© Lisa McCrohan 19

You may also enjoy something but you aren’t really great at it. Here you

can either A) build that skill, or B) admit you aren’t great at it and stop

doing it!

Too often we aren’t thriving at work because we aren’t working in our zone

of genius. Your zone of genius is something you are excellent at AND you

enjoy doing it. To thrive as a leader or entrepreneur, start working in your

zone of genius for the majority of your work week.

Try this: Identify your zone of genius.

1. Make a list of what you love to do – when you are doing it, you are “in the flow.”

2. Now, write down what you are excellent at. Compare the two lists. What appears on BOTH lists? That is your zone of genius.

HER VOICE IS RISING by Lisa McCrohan

Her world changed the day she real ized she could

speak her truth and remain embodied, rooted

in her integrity, making space for

the ful l expression of anger, grief, and ecstasy.

Everything shifted the day she chose

to r ise.

•••

© Lisa McCrohan 20

ONE DAY SHE REALIZED by Lisa McCrohan

One day she real ized that the person she needed to tend to th e most

was her own self. Even as a mom, a lover, a healer, a fr iend, she understood that where she needed to

put her attention - every s ingle day – was on her own self -care.

So she decided to take charge of her schedule, t ime and energy -

and let the world think what it wanted to. For she knew that by deeply nourishing her own self ,

she would teach her children how to do the same, she would start a revolution of radical self -honoring with her soul sisters, she would embody her power

and ask very clearly for what she needed - at home, in her relat ionships, and in her work -

and she would be a powerful source of healing for this world because of her

radical commitment to self -compassion.

•••

© Lisa McCrohan 21

ONE GLORIOUS FIRST STEP by Lisa McCrohan

There comes a t ime in your l ife when you have to final ly follow that One Desire

that has been here, inside your heart, your bones, the very f iber of your being, for possibly decades.

Before you do anything else or put energy into a new project or pursuit or dist ract ion,

you must f inally see and tend to this longing that has been cal l ing to you.

There comes a t ime when

you must f inally have the courage to name that

One Holy

Desire and gather those around you who can hold space for you

and hear you speak this desire into the world.

There comes a t ime when

you can let the tears f low now because you are finally aligned with your truth

and in speaking it , you didn't die – as ego and fear had you thinking for so long -

but rather now you feel a new sense of freed om and breathing space across your chest and belly.

You embody a new sense of al iveness - an al iveness you know as your birthright.

There comes a t ime when

the voices of the world begin to fade into nothingness and you laugh now because

not even the ghost of doubt can shake you. Instead, now what wakes you in the middle of the night

is the cal l of your Heart leading you to take that one glorious f irst step

in the direct ion of Home.

•••

© Lisa McCrohan 22

• Book: Check out my book, Gems of Delight: seasonal inspirations for moms

to heal the hurry and embrace what is sacred.

• Blog: You’ll find soul-nourishing habits on my blog. Sign up on my website

to get updates!

• Online: Connect on social media! Find daily inspirational posts on

Facebook, Instagram, and Linkedin to support you to rise and thrive in

your home, work, and life.

Lisa McCrohan, MA, LCSW-C, SEP Integrative Coach. Somatic Experiencing Practitioner. Author.

lisa@lisamccrohan.com • www.lisamccrohan.com

New Online Course!

Regarding Our Children If you are interested in building your child’s resiliency, compassionate

leadership skills, and growth mindset, you’re going to love this online course.

You can find out more about ROC here.

Ready to invest in yourself?

Personal + Professional Support = Integrative Coaching If my work resonates with you, consider hiring me as your Integrative Coach! I

offer coaching online or in person (Frederick, MD). Schedule a free phone

consult online now and let’s talk about how I may be able to support you:

lisamccrohan.com/call