Fireproof Your MarriageFireproof Your Marriage2009 Marriage Seminar of International Church of Christ, 2009 Marriage Seminar of International Church of Christ,

Lagos.Lagos.

Class Delivered byClass Delivered byGeorge OputaGeorge Oputa

04/21/23 2

Fireproof Romance?Fireproof Romance?

“Don’t leave your partner behind”

04/21/23 3

Romance: DefinitionRomance: Definition

• Men: Sex

• Women: love, warmth, closeness, attention, communication, dedication

• Your definition defines your understanding

04/21/23 4

Fires that destroy romanceFires that destroy romance

• Wrong attitude to sex- “it is meant to be enjoyed (More women than men need more help on this)

- Fact? Sex is meant to be enjoyed

- Gen:2 (God sees man and woman together as very good)

04/21/23 5

• Past Guilt- Did you mess up with the same woman in the past?- Carry over guilt leads to loss of dignity- Good news! We have grace!- You can’t change the past, learn to deal with it.- Learn to put out the fires of past guilt and other past

relationship junk memories

Fires that destroy romanceFires that destroy romance

04/21/23 6

• Marital Unfaithfulness- Raging fire that can destroy- Breads endless list of negative behavior (rage,

bitterness, murder, anger)

Note: There is no justification for marital unfaithfulness

04/21/23 7

No matter how long you’ve been married, always go back to the following passages

• Proverbs 4 (25-27)• Proverbs 5 (1-23)• Proverbs 6 (27-29)

04/21/23 8

• What the world is saying:- “ There is something wrong with you, if you’re not having

extra-marital sex”- Sex with several people is thrilling, you’re simply locked

out on the boring stuff.

NB: have you noticed how confused “love songs” are? One point, they are hailing immorality, the next, they talking of heartbreaks and how terrible things are!

04/21/23 9

• Pornography- do you need a check on your computer?

• Financial Matters

• Bitterness, rage, anger, resentment- Words that are said put distance between man and

woman- How can you be warm, when there is no caring attitude?- Learn to say I’m sorry and mean (Proverbs 12:18)

04/21/23 10

• Changing Bodies- Study out Songs of Solomon’s description of man and

woman.- As we get older, our physical structures change.- The body might change, but the person you married still

remains. You’ve got to love that body!- If you need to get in shape, then work at it. Don’t

demand what you can’t give

04/21/23 11

• Using sex as a tool or weapon to punish the other- selfishness (1 Corinthians 1-5)

- Each man should have his wife because?- Discourse selfishness- Fulfill your marital duties to one another- The Bible encourages regular sexual relationship (come together

again)- Never turn each other down- Satan knows us well

NB: “ it is as wrong to say yes to the wrong person as it is to say no to the right person”

04/21/23 12

Two Perspectives of SexTwo Perspectives of Sex

• Women: Security

• Men: Entertainment

- It is a unique part of human relationship reserved only for Married people

04/21/23 13

What Kind of Man do you want What Kind of Man do you want to be?to be?

• A Sensitive Man =S• An undivided Man =U• A Prayerful Man =P• An Extra-mile Man =E• A Romantic Man =RIf you do all these, you’ll be able to withstand the heat and

extinguish the negative fires that consume and burn down many marital relationships. For short, you’ll become…..SUPERMAN

04/21/23 14

Thank YouThank You