Portofolio 1by Helena Meireles

FILE

TIME SUBMITTED 07-DEC-2016 09:04PM

SUBMISSION ID 63687474

WORD COUNT 3710

CHARACTER COUNT 19118

SCAMP.MOODLEDATA_TEMP_TURNITINTOOL_1452713107.PORTOFOLIO_1.DOCX (28.39K)

QM

FINAL GRADE

58/100

Portofolio 1GRADEMARK REPORT

GENERAL COMMENTS

InstructorIt was a demanding task to complete all sevensections within the specif ied word count, and youhave done a f airly good job of it.

Feedback is provided in the annotatedcomments, so please read through them to makesure that you understand why your portf olio hasreceived the mark that it has.

If you need any f urther clarif ication about thecomments, or would like additional f eedback,either in writ ing or f ace-to-f ace, please let meknow.

Main areas f or you to f ocus on f or improvementare:

Think more caref ully about the tasks that are setand give more detail when making points.

Write in a more f luent style, including more detail,rather than in short one-or- two sentenceparagraphs that lack clarity.

Give more thought to what is being asked f or.

Overall, this is a f airly good piece of work, butf eels a bit sketchy overall, mainly due to thewrit ing style.

Steve Jones

PAGE 1

Strikethrough.

SurnamesGive surnames only, except when you need to distinguish between two or more authors whohave the same surname

Comment 2Not clear what this means.

Comment 3Need a ref erence f or this.

Comment 4We don't use this word. Nothing is ever 'proved'. It can be 'shown' or 'suggested'.

PAGE 2

Comment 5Good summary, but needs a brief conclusion at the end.

Comment 6Has

Comment 7again

Comment 8Don't write very short paragraphs (especially single-sentence ones).

Comment 91970 and 1980s

Comment 10Bogar & Beyer)

PAGE 3

Comment 11A bit disjointed. Try to provide a more f lowing account. Needs some sort of concludingstatement.

Comment 12On your ref erences list, this is an article about recycling, not torture.

Comment 13Is there such a thing as 'posit ive torture'?

PAGE 4

Comment 14Relevant points, but all drawn f rom a single journal article. What's more, the article inquestion is about recycling! It is not clear why you have added that ref erence to the end ofevery paragraph. You need to cite the correct sources. Also, there were 10 articles, sosummarising one of them is not what was asked f or.

Comment 15

It didn't help the army tracker, though, so this seems unlikely.

PAGE 5

Comment 16It 's a place to hide. I'm not sure the temperature is important.

PAGE 6

Comment 17But what would you measure? What would you compare in order to determine whetherpsychic ability has been demonstrated? This really wouldn't be any better than the studies inthe video. You need to think more caref ully about what a study needs to be able to do.

Comment 18studies (we don't talk about 'researches', as this doesn't make sense).

Comment 19Unclear

Comment 20Not clear.

Comment 21As with the earlier sections, this is very disjointed, consisting of short paragraphs that donot really explain anything in any detail.

PAGE 7

Comment 22Inappropriately casual language.

Comment 23customer

PAGE 8

PAGE 9

Comment 24Too casual

Comment 25Summary of the study, but you have not explained the purpose of health psychology oroutlined how the study used health psychology principles. Pay attention to what the task isasking f or.

PAGE 10

PAGE 11

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RUBRIC: PSY4372 PORTFOLIO

KNOWLEDGE

90-100

80-89

70-79

60-69

50-59

40-49

30-39

0-29

ANALYSIS

90-100

80-89

70-79

60-69

50-59

40-49

30-39

0-29

SOURCES

90-100

60-69

Knowledge and Understanding

Polished grasp of subject. Astute and authoritative approach to complexity.

Comprehensive and conf ident grasp with strong sense of subject complexity.Explicit ly answers the question or addresses the specif ic task requirements.

Thorough understanding is evident and has been well applied to the question ortask. Explicit ly answers the question or addresses the task requirements.

Secure, general understanding and reasonable application to question or task.Attempts to answer the tasks in an analytical way.

Sound knowledge relevant to the task.

Limited knowledge shows basic understanding. Some awareness of the context ofthe portf olio task

Faulty understanding of question or concepts. Irrelevant or mostly absent content.

No understanding of question or concepts. Irrelevant or absent content.

50-59

Analysis and Conclusions

Original and searching analysis, crit ical appraisal of task and judicious conclusions.The conclusions presented provide a comprehensive and highly ef f ective summaryof the issues presented and discussed. Overall, the analysis and conclusions arecompelling.

Searching analysis with pertinent conclusions drawn. Draws conclusions thatprovide an excellent summary of the issues discussed in each of the portf oliosections

Insightf ul analysis throughout with appropriate conclusions drawn.

Strong analysis of salient illustrative examples. Some general conclusions drawn.

Some conclusions drawn based on some reasonable comparisons and examples.

Basic analysis. Remains descriptive, lit t le evaluation or comparison. Few clearconclusions.

Insuf f icient evaluation or attempt to make comparisons. Conclusions illogicalinsuf f icient.

No evaluation or attempt to make comparisons. Conclusions illogical or absent.

60-69

Use of sources & evidence

Extensive and evaluative use of evidential support. Gives very wide-ranging and

80-89

70-79

60-69

50-59

40-49

30-39

0-29

COMMUNICATION

90-100

80-89

70-79

60-69

50-59

40-49

30-39

0-29

REFERENCING

90-100

80-89

70-79

appropriate evidential support f or points made throughout the portf olio andshows evidence of having explored the appropriate literature thoroughly andcrit ically.

Extensive use of evidence with some evaluation. Gives wide-ranging andappropriate evidential support f or claims made, and shows evidence of havingexplored the appropriate literature thoroughly and crit ically.

Clear support of argument with well selected evidence. Appropriate evidentialsupport f or claims made along with evaluation and crit ical analysis.

Draws on relevant independent sources and evidence to support claims.

Makes simple use of evidence f rom recommended sources.

Relies on superf icial statements with litt le supporting evidence.

Lack of evidence or relevant sources.

No evidence or relevant sources.

50-59

Written communication

Prof essional and sophisticated with exceptional clarity and coherence. Excellent,controlled, conf ident delivery, pace, and audience engagement.

Prof essional and f luent with great clarity and coherence.Excellent, controlled,conf ident delivery, pace, and audience engagement.

Fluent and accurate with great clarity and coherence. Mostly conf ident delivery,pace and audience engagement.

Clear and coherent.

Some lapses of clarity. Some expression is inef f ective.

Adequate, but awkward expression throughout with litt le clarity.

Inadequate and unclear presentation. Impaired communication. Error-strewn.

Grossly inadequate and unclear presentation. Severely impaired communication.Error-strewn.

50-59

Adherence to APA-style ref erencing conventions

Flawless, including in- text citations and the f ormat and content of the ref erenceslist.

Flawless, including in- text citations and the f ormat and content of the ref erenceslist.

Excellent, including in- text citations and the f ormat and content of the ref erenceslist.

60-69

50-59

40-49

30-39

0-29

Consistent and accurate, including in- text citations and the f ormat and content ofthe ref erences list.

Largely consistent and accurate, including in- text citations and the f ormat andcontent of the ref erences list.

Limited ref erencing and/or adherence to APA style.

Inadequate ref erencing.

Inadequate or absent.