This Month’sFeatures

Letter From the Editor2

5 Desperate For Some Real Wives’ Lives

7The New Supermom

8 Interview with James Rohl,Stay-at-Home Dad

11When Mommies and Tweets Collide

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2

Letter from the Editor

Assummerfindsitswaybackintoourlives,sotoodoestheoverbearingheat,soundsof children on summer-break, and the ringingof ice cream trucks.Our livesbecomepackedinto longerdaysofhumidity and sun-screenedsweat.We here at FEMZINE have been hardatworkproducing an issue thatwill hopefullyprovide you with relief from the responsibili-tiesofcareer,family,andwhateverelseitisthatoccupiesyourday-to-dayliving.Thisissueisallabout housewives, andour aim this issue is tochallenge you.Wewant to challenge how youthink about housewives.Wewant to challengeyoutorethinkwhatagoodhousewifedoes.Wewant tochallengeyou to thinkaboutwhocanbe a housewife.This issue’s theme is all aboutthejoysanddownfallsofbeingahousewife(ormaybeevenahousehusband). Thetopicofhousewivesisoftentimesleft out of feminist discourse because the oc-cupationisdismissedasbeinganti-feminist.Wewanttobreakthisstereotype.Talkabouthouse-wives.While theymightnotcontribute toourcapitalist economy in a traditionalway, house-wivesprovidevaluableandirreplaceablework.Manyof youwill be or are housewives.Manyofyouaretiredoftheportrayalofhousewivesinthemedia.Manyofyouconsideryourselvessupermoms without ever stepping foot into akitchen.WeatFEMZINEaretoo.Ourmissionis to supportyour individualmission:whetheryourtaskisshufflingkidsaroundtoschoolandfromsportsgames,orshufflingpapersattheof-fice. Webeganourissuebyaskingour-selves:Whatdoesitmeantobeahousewife?Ourintrospectionandresearchrevealedthatwhilefeministshavemadeprogressforwomen,ourideasaboutwhatmakesagoodmotherandwiferemainssuspendedintime.Thisissuehopestomakeprogressonhowweviewhouse-wivesandtochallengeideasaboutawoman’s

“natural”place.Ourarticleswilladdressanumberofissuesthathousewivestodayface:familialhappiness,representationinthemedia,andevenpoliticalrhetoricsurroundingtheiroccupation.Genderrolesandsocialstigmastillsurroundandinfluencewhatitmeanstobeahousewife.Ourwriterschallengedthemselvestothinkoutsidethebox,andwehopeyouare

uptothechallengetoo. Wefoundourselvesaskingaboutthewaysthatmothersarerepresentedinthemedia.FromTheRealHousewivesofOrangeCountyto kitchen appliance TV advertisements, wefound that our view of mothers in the mediais limited.AsMothers’Daycomesandgo,wereflected on why it is so problematic to viewmothersinsuchaconstrictingway.Ourarticleswilltouchuponourownmotherstoo.Weviewourmothers asmuchmore than child-rearingindividuals:theyareoursuperheroes,ourthera-pists,ourteachers.Wehopeyoucometothinkofyourmothersinmanydifferentwaystoo. What makes this issue so special ishowclosetohomeitwillhitformanyofyou.Whetheryouaremaleorfemale,child-rearingand managing a family is one of the hardestjourneysyouwillundertakeinyourlife.Frombalancing a career to balancing time, raising afamily and being a mother or father requirespersistenceandpatience.Ourissueandarticlesemphasizetheimportantofchoiceandflexibil-ity.Whatmayworkasafamilystructureforonefamilymaynotworkforanother.Ouridentifica-tionasfeministsshouldforceustothinkoutsideof the traditional roles that women have his-toricallybeenboxedinto.BettyFriedaninTheFeminineMystique first described the troublethat educated women faced when they wereforcedtobestayathomemothers.Constrainedtoaroutinelife,Friedanarticulatedwhatmanywomenthoughtbutcouldn’tsay.Andwewanttocontinueinthistradition:ourarticlesarere-flectiveofthecontinuedstruggletogivewomenmorechoicessotheycanattainfulfillmentandhappiness. FriedanquotesaNewYorkTimesarti-clethatdescribestheproblemofunhappywom-en:theywere“deeplyfrustratedattimesbythelackofprivacy,thephysicalburden,theroutineoffamilylife,theconfinementofit”(Kolmar&Bartkowski,165).Fortunately,stridesintheso-

cialpositionofwomenhavemadeitpossibleforwomentochoosealternativeroutesthanfamilylife.Cookingorcleaningdoesnotdefinebeingahousewife;insteaditisaboutdoingwhatisbestforyou,oryourfamily,orboth.Sowhyisthisnotseenasvaluablework?Feministshavemadetheargumentthatwomenshouldbepaidforthehousework. Others disagree. One economist,DougasW.Allen,arguesthetraditionalapproachtodiscussingthevalueofhouseworkisflawed.Inhisjournalarticle,“ABetterMethodforAs-sessingtheValueof“Housewife”Service,”Allenarguesthattocomparehouseworkwithjobsthatcontributetothemarketisto“missthepointofmarriage.”Hecontinues,“Marriage,asaninsti-tution,isdesignedtoproduceasetofgoodsthatthemarketdoesnotproduce.”Wecannotthinkofworkinthehomeinthesamewaywethinkofworkintheworkplacebecausemarriage/part-nerships are a separate institution altogether,thatproducesaseparatesetof“goods.” I recently stumbled upon a blogcalled “Off Beat Mama” where a contributornamed Narasha Pinterics blogged about be-inga“feministhousewife.”Pintericsrejectsthewordhousewifeorhomemakeraltogether,eventhough she is a stay at home mom. Pintericshas amasters inGender Studies and does notidentifywiththesetermsbecause“[they]aresoloadedwithpatriarchalbullshitthatIcanbarelyutter them in any seriousness, much less usethemtodescribemyselforwhatIdo.”WehereatFEMZINEwanttochallengethenotionthatthewordhousewifeimpliesanoccupationthatisnotserious.Wewanttorejectthenotionthatbeingahousewifeisnotaseriousjobbecauseitisour“natural”roletobeacaretaker.Describeyourselfanylabelyou’dlike.Homemaker.Stayat homemom. Stay at home dad. Housewife.Caretaker.Whateveryoucallyourself,doitwithapowerthatrejectsthestereotype.Doitwiththepowerknowing thatyouaredoingwhat isbestforyourself,foryourfamily,foryourchil-dren.AsFreidanwrites,“Itisnolongerpossibletoignorethatvoice,todismissthedesperationofsomanyAmericanwomen”(165).Considerthisyourcalltopower. Sincerely,

Tram HaTramHa

ByMaddieGoldman

Childish quips. Nudity and debauchery. CatfightsonFifthAvenue.RealityTV’splayonhu-morreachesanewlevelwiththeRealHouse-wives,aseriesofseparateshowsthattakeplacein different wealthy communities across thecountry.Theshowsdelveintothelivesofseveralaffluentwomen and their families and friends.Beyondtheextravaganceandglamourhowever,theshowhasironicfallaciesthatrendersitun-abletoportraythe“reality”ofsuburbiabehindcloseddoors.The titleof the showalone isenough to stir achuckle.Themajorityof thecharactersdoev-erything but housework. The show depictswomeninwealthy,suburbanandurbanenviron-ments,withanagendathatissosuperficialthatyoubegintowonderiftheyevenhaveahouseorkidstotakecareofattheendoftheday.Theyspendtheirdaysshoppingandpamperingthem-selves,goingouttobrunchanddrinkingexpen-sivebottlesofchampagne.Someofthewomenon the showarenot evenmarried.Thus,boththewords“house”and“wife”areentirelydele-gitimizedwithin the title. Let alone theword“real”,whenthe livesof theserichwomenareanythingbutrepresentativeofsuburbanhouse-wivestryingtosurviveintheunstableeconomy.Butperhapsalloftheseironiesareallpartoftheproducersplan.ThewomencastinRealHousewivescanhardlycallthemselvesgrownwomen.Stuckintheju-venilestageofdramaandimmaturity,thecast-

mateshavenosociallimitations.InanepisodeofRealHousewivesofNewJersey,twoofthecast-mates,TeresaGuidiceandDanielleStaub,whileat dinnerwere engaged in a heated discussionthat eventually lead to Danielle tellingTeresaoffforherignorancebyyelling,“Payattention!Puh-lease!”TeresathenrespondedinfitofragethatwentasfarasflippingatableatDanielle,allthewhilespittingoutswearsandinsults.Lookslike someone needs to up her Xanaxmedica-tion.OrperhapsinRealHousewivesofOrangeCounty when one housewife, Tamra Barney,hosted a party and invited another cast-mate,JeanaKeough,whomsheknewdisparagedhername to themedia.During the party the twogetintoafrenziedfightthatresultedinaletterfromTamra’s attorney being thrown in Jeana’sfaceandchampagnebeingtossedeverywhere.Research has revealed that there is a secretivedrive towatchrealityTVthat“best separate[s]the regular viewers of reality television fromeveryoneelse”(ReissandWiltz1):itisthecre-ationofanaccessibleportalintoaworldoffameand recognition,despite the fact that, inmanyshows’cases, itmaybe for thewrongreasons.StevenReiss,aprofessoratOhioStateUniver-sity,stated“wethinkweareimportantifotherspayattentiontousandunimportantifignored”(1). In the case of Real Housewives, viewersenthusiasticallywatch thedocumented lives ofthese “normal” women;women that theymayaspiretobe,ortheymaybeabletopicturere-placinginthenextseason.Thesheersizeoftheaudience of realityTV viewers is so immense

thatnotonlydoes itencouragethefameof itsparticipants,butrevealstheutterfascinationofAmerica’sviewerswiththelivesofwealthypeo-ple,whetherasanoutletforhumor,voyeurism,ornationalreverent.HowdoesRealHousewivesstray fromdepict-ing housewife expectations that have stemmedfrom ages of patriarchal influence and gendernorms?Istherevaluetobeseenintheindepen-dent,frivolouslivesofthesewomen?AndhowdoesRealHousewivescaptivateviewerswithitsauraofmockeryandparody?Theconceptionofhousewife,developedintheearlyandmid-20thcentury, hinted themes of “conformity, banal-ity,andstiflingdomesticity”(Chocano1).Earlyfeminist documents such as those written byMaryWollstonecraftinthe1700s,discussestheunspoken tyranny ofmen overwomenwithinthehousehold.Wollstonecraftwritesthatwom-en“arerenderedweakandluxuriousbythere-laxingpleasuresthatwealthprocures…theyaremade slaves to theirpersons, andmust renderthemalluringthatmanmaylendthemhisreasontoguidetheirtotterystepsaright”(KolmarandBartkowski 63). Not much has changed fromthehousewifebackthentothehousewifenow.ShowssuchasRealHousewiveshavemanipulat-edthissocietalassociationintothelavishlivesofthesewomen.Theterm“housewife”isnow“justaslikelytoevokeextravagance,indulgenceandfreedomas it is domestic servitude” (Chocano1).RealHousewiveshastakenthisnewmeaningofthetermandmanipulatedtheroleintoan“oc-cupation”ofluxuryandindependence,straying

Desperate for Some Real Wives’ LivesA Commentary on Voyeurism in “Real Housewives”

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farawayfromtherealitiesofbeinganeverydayhomemaker.Thesewomenhavebeencastedfortheir utter incompetence and lack ofmaturitybecause the producers desire to cast womenwhodonotfitintosociety’smolded,housewifenorm.Thecharactersandtheirflashylivesgetariseoutofviewers,whichiswhattheproducerswant.However,possiblythemostvaluablequal-ityofRealHousewivesisthatwhilethelivesofthesewomencanbehumiliatingtootherwom-en,itcanalsobeagreedthatthroughwatchingthe banality of their arguing and competition,theshowremindsuswomenofthecompetitionweonce(andstilldo)facebetweenoneanotherashousewives.WhereasRealHousewivesenter-tainsuswiththe“friendly”rivalrybetweenthewomenoverhusbands,houses,cars,wealth,andfunctionalordysfunctionalfamilies,ourhistorystillmocksusforourparticipationinthecom-petitionpresentwithinourownlives.Whetherit is through thepurchasingGoodHousekeep-ingorMarthaStewartLivingMagazine,hostingluncheons or book group gatherings, house-wivesareallcompetingwitheachothertocre-ateandmaintaintheideal,comfortablelifetobeenviedandresented.Perhapsitisnotthelivesofthesewomenthatweshouldbelaughingat,butourown.q

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TheRealHousewivesofOrangeCounty,TamraandJaenaargueatadinnerparty.

TeresafromRealHousewivesofNewJerseyflipsatableatDanielleoverdinner.

the real housewives?

The New Supermom

ByCharlotteAllyn

Asupermomisawomanwhoissuccessfullyem-ployed,raisesherchildrenandstillhastimetodoallofthehouseworkinherhome.Notonlydoes a supermom represent amodern, work-ing woman, but she still hasn’t given up thevery traditional ideals of motherhood: cook-ing,cleaning,andtheoneinchargeofdomestictasks.Television advertisements show womenwho are supermoms. In an advertisement forElectroluxappliances,KellyRipa,aTVactress,is shown running out of her job at the televi-sionstudioandgoinghometocookdinnernotonlyforherkidsbutalsoforadinnerpartyforherfriends.Sheworks,cooks,cleans,andkeepseveryone happy. And Ripa appears incrediblycontentmanagingherjobandhouseholdduties.Butwhy,afteryearsofwomenfightingformoreegalitarian household roles, isRipa (and otherwomenontelevision)stillrepresentedinalim-itedway? I consider my own mother a super-mom.Shewasasupermomnotbecauseshedideverything, but because shedidwhatwas bestforourfamily.Andwhatwasbestforourfamilywasforbothherandmyfathertowork,andtowork together take care of us. InKellyRipa’sElectroluxadvertisement,herhusbandwasno-wheretobeseen.Inmyfamily,mydadwouldbeaspresentaroundtheElectroluxasmymom.Theideathatwomencouldonlyfindhappinessthroughhouseworkwas first challenged in theearly1960s inBettyFriedan’sbookTheFemi-nineMystique.Called“TheProblemthathasNoName,”Friedanidentifiedanuneasinessandun-happiness in housewives acrossAmerica,manywho felt a sense of incompleteness (Friedan,

164).“Itcanbelesspainfulforawomannottohearthestrange,dissatisfiedvoicestirringwith-inher,”wroteFriedan.“Itisnolongerpossibletoignorethatvoice,todismissthedesperationof somany women” (Friedan, 165).After therelease of the book, ideas aboutwomen’s roleinthehousebegantochange.Womenbegantowork,anditbecamemoreaccepted.Themediahasbeenslowtorespondtothisshift,asRipa’sadvertisement,andmanyotherslikeitshow.Howeverin2010,awomannamedKath-erineWintsch started a think tank called theMomComplextotryandchangethat.Thegoalof theMomComplex is to representmothersmore realistically in advertisements.The thinktankispartofTheMartinAgency,aprominentadvertising agency.Wintsch found that manywomen, including herself, felt misunderstoodand misrepresented by advertisements. In aninterviewwithForbesMagazine,Wintschnotedthattheideaof“supermom”wasquicklyfadinginreallife,butpersistedinadvertising.Wintschbelievesthatthereisanevolutionhappeninginhowwomenwant tobeseenandportrayedasmothers(Goudreau).Thesemomsdonotwanttobeidolizedinspotlesskitchens,theywishtobe portrayed realistically.The Mom Complexhasmadeprogressworkingtoportraymothersmore realistically in advertisements for largecompaniessuchasWalmart. The Mom Complex was created toshow that women are happier when they findfulfillment from other areas in their lives be-sides their spotless kitchens. A recent study,publishedin2011intheJournalofFamilyPsy-chology,foundthatmotherswithjobsarehap-pier thanwomenwho are stay-at-homemoms(Buehler and Obrien, 904).The study, called“Mothers’ Part-Time Employment: Associa-tionsWithMother and FamilyWell-Being,” byCheryl Buehler and Marion O’Brien, foundthatmotherswhoworked part-timewere notonlyhappierthanstayathomemothersbutalsoreportedmore involvement in their children’slives andhome life thanmotherswhoworkedfulltime.Thestudybeganin1991andincludedinterviewsof1,364mothers.These interviewsbegan right after the birth of their child. Fol-low-up interviews and observations of happi-ness andwell-beingwere conducted in a timespanofmorethan10years,andthenanalyzed.TheAmericanPsychologicalAssociation,whichsponsorsthejournal,reportedthatBuehlernot-ed“Inallcaseswithsignificantdifferencesinma-ternalwell-being,suchasconflictbetweenwork

andfamilyorparenting,thecomparisonfavoredpart-timeworkover full-timeornotworking”(APA).Buehler,althoughconcludingthatthebestsitu-ation formotherswas toworkpart-time, alsofound that “in many cases the well-being ofmomsworkingpart-timewasnodifferentfrommoms working full time.”The study does notaddress the happiness of mothers when otheroptionsareconsidered, suchas:womanworkspart-time and man works full time; womanworks part-time and man works part-time;woman works full time and man works part-time;andwomanworksfulltimeandmanstayshome. Even though part-time and full-timeworkingmothersdidnothaveasignificantdis-parityinhappiness,theresearchersinthestudystill concluded that amotherwould rather behomeforsomehoursofthedayinordertohavelessconflictbetweenworklifeandhomelife.TheMomComplex,aswellasotheradvertise-ments,areworkingtoportraymomsmorere-alisticallyontelevision,butaretheyconsideringeverytypeofmom?Theresearchersstillassumethatmothersmusthaveacentralroleinhouse-workandchildrearingtobehappy,evenwhentheresultsconcludethatfull-timemotherscanbeashappy.While theMomComplextries torepresent“supermoms”inamorerealisticlight,theyarenotaddressingeverytypeofwoman.A“supermom”isamotherwhodoeswhatisbestforher family.Andsometimeswhat isbest forherfamily,andherownhappiness,wouldbetowork full-time. She can also work part-time,likemymotherwhenwewere growingup. Itis an injustice to supermoms everywhere thathaveadifferentfamilystructuretoassumethatportraying women in advertisements as “lessperfect”isenough.Supermomsareeverywhere.The evolution of representation needs to becontinued.q

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Spotlight: Interview With James RohlStay-At-Home Dad

JamesRohl is a stay-at-home dad in Portland,Oregon.Rohl decided to start a blog to sharehisdailyadventuresasastayathomedad,andalsotorecordwhatitfeelsliketooccupyarolethatnotmanyother fathers takepart in,butarolethat isgrowing inpopularity. Inanarticlein the Washington Post titled “Stay-at-homeDadsarefindingit’snotSuchaBadPlacetoBe,”authorKrista Jahnkewrites that“The goal formostfamiliesistoevolvetoaplacewherebothparentsflourishintheirroles.”Rohlandhiswifedojustthat.Inthe“About”sectionofhisblog,Rohlwrites,“whatwillcontinuehereinthisspaceisoursto-ry.”Rohluseshisblogtosharethisstory,whichcontinues to change and evolve. Rohl and hiswifedecidedthathe“wastheonethatwasbet-tersuitedtobeathome.Itwasaneasydecisiononcewetalkedaboutwantingoneofustobeathome.”Butthejobhascomewithitschallenges,andRohluseshisblogtodiscusstheimpactofthesechallenges inadditionto the joys thatherecords.Inonepost,Rohldescribesonpre-schoolmeet-ingsheattends,whereheisoftentheonlymale.The language at these meetings is often “allabout capablemoms and goof ball dads.”Rohlthinksthatinsomeways,“parentinghasbecomethelaststandforwomen.”Hewritesthatheis“cool”withthat,buthe’sreadytochallengethegeneralizations thatcomealongwith it:“whenyou’re ready to put the stereotypes down andtalkparenttoparentIwouldlovetoswaptod-dlerstrategieswithyou,”hewrites.Rohlisef-fectively using the internet not only to spreadhis message about putting down these stereo-types,butalsoisnormalizingtheroleofbeingastayathomedadbyspreadinghismessageacrossthe blogosphereworld.Rohl took the time to

answersomeofmyquestionsabouthisexperi-encesasastayathomedad,andhisexperiencesbloggingaboutit.

What do you like best about being a stay at home dad?

IthinkIlikethefactthatIgettobetherewiththeboysastheydiscoversomuch.Tobeintheclassrooms and playgrounds while they learnandplay isa lotof funandIwanttohavethatroleintheirlives.

What are the biggest challenges?

ThisbiggestchallengestobeingastayathomedadarethesameasanyprofessionIthink.There

aredayswhenthegrasslooksgreenerorques-tions ofmy effectiveness come up and I thinkI would like to do something else, but thosethoughtsarequicklygonewhenIholdthemuptowhatIhave.

Why did you decide to start a blog about it?

Ioriginallystartedwritingwhenwefoundoutmywifewaspregnant the first time and I hadrecentlymovedawayfromfriendsandfamily.IwantedtokeepthemuptodateandtosomehowgetthefeelingsIwashavingdownformyselfaswell.IsupposeIwantedpeopletothinkIcouldtellthingsinacleverwaytooifI’mhonest.Welost that baby and the blog became about thatloss and then about rehabbing an old home inIndianapolisuntilwewerepregnantagain.Thatblog has been retired and I started a newone

aftermovingbacktoPortlandandbecomingastayathomedadagainbecauseIwantedtoshowthatIwasagoodparentandintentionalandnotsome out-of-work father babysitting his kidswhilelookingforwork.

Do you feel that you face any scru-tiny or judgment from mothers you know who stay at home with their children?

EarlyonIdidfeelthatjudgmentandIthinkitmaybetheresometimes,butIalsothinkIwashypersensitiveandsomehowprojectingwhatIthoughtsomemom’sreactionswouldbe.Ihavefound somemoms are standoffish with me atthe parks and coffee houses until they see theboysandmeacoupleoftimes.Mykidsarere-allygreatandwhileIthinkthathaslittletodowithmestayinghome,ithelpslendingmesomeparentalcredibilitywiththemoms.

What, to you, does an egalitarian household look like?

Things aren’t ever going to be equal when itcomes to the household but I think knowingyourpartnerandwhattheirstrengthsandweak-nesses are helps frame the conversation aboutwhodoeswhat.Tomeanegalitarianhouseholdisonewhereeachpersonisvaluedandtreatedwithrespectandtheroles thatare filledcomefrom knowing the person not from expectedgenderorageroles.

What is your advice for young people who are planning families who want to consider other options besides adhering to traditional gen-der roles?

Myadviceistohavehonestconversationswithyour partner or support system. I think thatfamilyrolesshouldbeworkedoutandnotex-pectedand sometimes they aregoing tobreakdown how you may have expected and othertimesyouwillbesurprisedbywherethecon-versationslead.Evenifyouthinkyouknowtheanswersthequestionsareworthexploring.BothmywifeandIhavehadtimebeingtheathomeparentandtimebeingtheworkingparent,andtheempathyandunderstandingthatcomesfromknowing what the other is experiencing is sohelpful.

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Do you think your children view gender roles differently than other children?

Ithinkourboysdoviewgenderrolesalittledif-ferentlybecauseweare intentional aboutcon-frontingthem.

What ideas about gender roles do you hope they gain?

Ihopetheyknowthatanyonecanfillanyroleinafamilyandinlifeingeneralandthattheynotonlyrealizethatintheirlivesbutthattheyfightforitintheircommunities.

Do you think for women who stay at home is it “less” of a choice than men who stay home with their kids?

WhileIdothinkmoremenhavehadthechancetochoosetobeathometherearemoredadsthatare home nowbecause of lost jobs.While thenumbersofathomedadsarestilllowthereisagrowing populationofmen that aren’t exactlychoosingthisrole.Foralongtimetherewasn’tachoiceforwomentomakeandanytimearoleisputuponyouinsteadofchosenitisgoingtobeahardertime.Ithinktherearealotoffami-liesthathaven’thadtheconversationaboutwhattheywouldeach liketodoandwhenexpecta-tiontrumpschoicetheroleisconstricting.

Do you think the internet is a good space for shaping and changing per-ceptions about gender?

Yesandno.Theinternetisgreatplacetoshareideasandlearnaboutallsortofgreatthingsanditisaplaceofvilehatredandanonymouscom-ments. I still think thebestplace for changingperceptionsisthelocalparks,coffeeshops,andschools.IcanwriteapostaboutMasculinityandtheStayAtHomeDadbutI’mmostlypreachingtothechoirofaselfselectinggroupthatalreadyvaluesathomedadsandseesthemstrongpar-ents rather than lazymen. I thinkmoremindsare expanded day after day at the preschoolwhenthoseparentsthathavewrittenmeoffashalf amanor somehow less thanhave to con-tinuallyconfronttherealityoftheengagedandcapableparentinfrontofthem.

In“ThirdWaveManifesta”fromMani-festa,JenniferBaumgardnerandAmyRichardshaveathirteen-pointagenda,withpoint12be-ing “To acknowledge that, although feministsmay have disparate values, we share the samegoal of equality” (Baumgarner and Richards,522).Bychallengingthegenderroles,menlikeRohlaredoingfeministworktoo.Rohlismak-ing steps toward equalitybybeing in theparkwithhischildren.Inhisinterview,Rohlempha-sizedtheimportanceofcommunicationwithhisspouse.ItisclearthatforRohl,feminismisnotjust about personal action, but also about thepartnershipbetweenhimselfandhiswife.Rohluseshisblogasaspacetotellhisstory,butbelievesthathistrueactivismtakesplaceinhisdailylife.His“activism”ishislifestyle.Heisfo-cusednotjustonhisownlifebutalsohisimpactonthecommunity,asevidencedinhishopethathisownboyswillgrowuptochallengegendernorms not only in their own lives but also inwhatever places they end up.As BaumgardnerandRichardswroteinthe“FeministManifesto,”“feministsmayhavedisparatevalues”(Baumgar-nerandRichards,523),buttheyareallworkingtowardequality.Rohlwrites,“This is the job Iwant,theoneIamgoodat,andtheonethatbestservesourfamily.”q

“I think I was hyper-sensitive and some-how projecting what I thought some mom’s reactions would be”

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“[Ann] never had to care for her kids AND earn a pay-check like MOST American women”

When Mommies and Tweets CollideByMaddieGoldman

OnApril 11thof this year,Democratic strate-gistHilaryRosentweetedonherTwitterpagethatAnnRomney,wifeofRepublicanpresiden-tialcandidate,MittRomney,had“neverworkedaday inher life”becauseofherchoicetobeastay-at-homemother. She continued her argu-mentonTwitteronthesameday,againtweet-ing,“[Ann]neverhadtocareforherkidsANDearnapaychecklikeMOSTAmericanwomen”(@hilaryr). Rosen’s comment comes from alonghistoryofpart-timeandfull-timeemploy-ment throughout various jobs and industries.Her comments also hint at a strong view of“work”initsmosttraditionalsense—bybeingacontributortosocietyoutsidethehome,despitethefactthatsheherselfisamotheroftwochil-dren.Rosen’scurrentwork isataDemocraticcommunications firmaswell asworking inde-pendentlyforherinterestsforcorporationssuchasCNN.Immediately following her Twitter posting,Rosen’scommentwasvastlycriticized.Repub-lican Senator Kelly Ayotte (New Hampshire)claimedRosenwasthe“president’sadviser”,andstatedthatitwas“insulting[thatshe]woulddis-miss the valueof… thehardworkwomendoin raising children” (Kucinich and Moore 1).Republican Representative Cynthia Lummis(Wyoming)arguedthatRosenwasbeingusedasa“surrogatewomen”todeliversuchamessagefromPresidentObamasothathecould“deliverhimself for fearof thebacklash” (KucinichandMoore 1).The comment was socontroversialbecause itdisreputeRomney for her choice to stayat home, and insinuated that allwomen’s work within the homeshouldn’t have any value, unlikethat of women working outsidethe home. The tweet ignited afeud between the twowomen asAnnRomneydefendedhercrucialroleasahousewifeandmotheroffivechildren,despiteher family’swealth. It is no secret that MittRomney isamultimillionaire,hisassetsgainedthrougha“dizzyingarrayofinvest-ments”including“banks,largeinvestmentman-agement firms, foreign export credit corpora-tions and real estate” (“Mitt RomneyWorth”1).WhileMittRomneyworked hisway up inranking and income through talent and tactic,Rosen’s comment stems from a long line of acriticism towards Ann Romney, arguing thatAnn Romney may have trouble relating most

American women because she married into awealthy,affluentfamilyandthereforeneverhadtoobtainanyamountofincomeofherown.ThefightbetweenHilaryRosenandAnnRom-ney represents a long-standing “mommy war”between mothers who stay at home to takecareoftheirkids,andmotherswhoexerttheir“independence” by being the breadwinner fortheir family. The main controversy behind“mommywars” isthatthereisnopossiblewayforwomen to universally agree onwho is thebettermother—thestayathomemotherorthe

workingmother.There is noway todevalue amotherwho devotes her hours tomaintainingthehouseholdandraisingchildrenwhilethefa-therobtains the family income, justas there isnowaytodiscreditawomanwhoworks,pos-siblybecauseshehasnoothermeansofincomeandnoother choice but towork.Housewivesandworkingmotherssufferfromlackofunder-standingofoneanotherduetoopposingsocio-economicstandpoints.WhileRosen’scommentexpresses the concern of electing a First Ladywholacksanunderstandingofworkingwomen,itisalsoignorantofAnnRomney’scommitmenttoher“fivechildren, threeor fourhouses and

twoCadillacs”(Hirshman1).Raisingafamilyoffivechildrenaloneishardwork.InTheAmericanEconomicReview,authorReu-benGronau(TheIntrafamilyAllocationofTime:TheValue of the Housewives’Time) discussesputtingvalueonthehousewife’swork,writingthatthe“wife’sdecisionwhethertoparticipate

inthelaborforcecanbeviewedintermsofthecomparisonbetweenhervalueoftimeintheab-senceofmarketopportunitiesandherpotentialwagerate”(635).Gronausaysthatduetoanin-crease in family incomeonthehusband’spart,“the demand for bothwife’s leisure and homegoods”becomesnecessary,andthewife“dropsoutofthelabormarketaltogether”(640).Feminist discourse applies an alternative viewonworkingwomenandtheirrelationshipswiththeir husbands. Crystal Eastman, a journalistfrom the early 20th century,writes about the“despair of feminist housewives” (Kolmar andBartkowski121).Sheclaimsthatwhile“agrow-ingnumberofmenadmirethewomanwhohasa job,” the “bread-winning wives have not yetdevelopedhome-makinghusbands”(121).East-manarguesthatwomenarevaluedfortheircon-tribution in thework force outside the home,butaresubjectedtoaculturaldouble-standardwhere theyareexpected toequally contributetoworkinsidethehome,workthatislabeledasthewife’sdomainandcannotbetakencareofbyastay-at-homehusband.Later inthedayonApril11th,Rosenclarifiedthe meaning behind her original tweet withseveralnewonesonTwitter,sayingthatshehas“nothingagainstAnnRomney.Ijustdon’twantMittusingherasanexpertonwomenstruggling$tosupporttheirfamily.Sheisn’t”(@hilaryr).She also publically announced her apology ontelevisionafterappearingonCNNseveraltimesthroughoutthecontroversy,revokingherstate-

mentto“AnnRomneyandanyoneelse who was offended,” should“declare peace in this phonywarandgoback to focuson the sub-stance”(Kucinich&Moore1).While this so-called “war” be-tween Democrats and Republi-cans,RosenandRomney,maybeover,theimplicationsofhercom-mentstill linger.Rosen’stweetismuch more than a personal jabatAnnRomney; it is symbolicofthe binary being forced betweenhousewivesandworkingmothers,

and can be interpreted as hurtful, demeaning,and demoralizing. Hilary Rosen’s tweet givesleeway into the ignorance of women towardsoneanother’ssocialandeconomicperspectivesand creates hope for a new form of discoursethatenvelopsperspectivesacrosstheboardandseeks to no longer discredit certain groups ofwomenforthelifestylechoicestheychoose,orareforced,tomake.q11

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The New Supermom

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Friedan,Betty.“TheProblemthatHasNoName.”FeministTheory.Ed.WendyK.KomarandFrancesBartkowski.NewYork:McGraw-Hill,2010.162-167.Print.

Goudreau,Jenna.“Wal-Mart’sMominChiefTargetsMillenialMothers.”ForbesMagazine.27January2011.Web.12May2012.

“WorkingMomsFeelBetterthanStay-at-HomeMoms,StudyFinds.”AmericanPsychologicalAssociation.n.p.,12December2011.Web.12May2012.

Desperate for some real wives lives

Chocano,Carina.“’Housewives,’Rebranded”.TheNewYorkTimes.Nytimes.com.18November2011.Web.13May2012.

Kolmar,WendyK.andFrancesBartkowski.FeministTheory:AReader.NewYork:McGraw-Hill,2010.Print.

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James Rohl INterview

Jhanke,Krista.“Stay-at-homeDadsarefindingit’snotSuchaBadPlacetoBe.”TheWashingtonPost.KatharineWeymouth.16October2010.Web.12May2012.

Rohl,James.“About.”StayatHomeDadPDX.Web.12May2012.

Baumgardner,JenniferandRichards,Amy.“ThirdWaveManifesta.”FeministTheory.Ed.WendyK.KomarandFrancesBartkowski.NewYork:McGraw-Hill,2010. 162-167.Print.

When Mommies and tweets collide

Gronau,Reuben.“TheIntrafamilyAllocationofTime:TheValueoftheHousewives’Time”.TheAmericanEconomicReview(1973):634-635.Web.13May2012.

Hirshman,Linda.“HilaryRosenwasright:AnnRomneydoesn’tspeakforwomenintheworkforce.”WPOpinions.TheWashingtonPost.Washingtonpost.com.13 April2012.Web.13May2012.

Kolmar,WendyK.andFrancesBartkowski.FeministTheory:AReader.NewYork:McGraw-Hill,2010.Print.

Kucinich,JackieandMarthaT.Moore.“HilaryRosensaysAnnRomneyneverworked‘dayinherlife’”.USAToday.USAToday.com.12April2012.Web.13May2012.

“MittRomneyWorthasMuchas#250Million,CampaignSays”.FoxNewsAssociatedPress.Foxnews.com.13August2007.Web.13May2012.

Rosen,Hilary(hilaryr).“I’venothingagainst@AnnRomney.Ijustdon’twantMittusingherasanexpertonwomenstruggling$tosupporttheirfamily.Sheisn’t.”11 April2012.8:09p.m.Tweet.

Rosen,Hilary(hilaryr).“WhenIsaid@AC360AnnRomneyneverworkedImeantsheneverhadtocareforherkidsANDearnapaychecklikeMOSTAmerican women!#Truth.”11April2012.7:55p.m.Tweet.

Weiner,Rachel.“WhoIsHilaryRosen?”.TheFixbyChrisCillizza.TheWashingtonPost.12April2012.Web.13May2012.

12

Letter from the editor

Allen,DouglasW.“ABetterMethodForAssessingTheValueOf“Housewife”Services.”AmericanJournalOfFamilyLaw23.4(2010):219-223.AcademicSearch Complete.

Kolmar,WendyK.,andFrancesBartkowski.“TheFeminineMystique.”FeministTheory:AReader.MountainView,CA:MayfieldPub.,1999.162-65.Print.

Pinterics,Natasha.“Yes,IAmaFeministHousewife.”RedefineFamily.OffBeatMama,02Mar.2010.Web.15May2012.<http://offbeatmama.com/2010/03/ feminist-housewife>.