Describe the Relation between Fears and Failures Describe the Relation between Desires and Success...

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Managing Success & Failures

Transcript of Describe the Relation between Fears and Failures Describe the Relation between Desires and Success...

Page 1: Describe the Relation between Fears and Failures Describe the Relation between Desires and Success Explain How to Overcome Fear of Success Explain the.

Managing Success & Failures

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• Describe the Relation between Fears and Failures• Describe the Relation between Desires and Success• Explain How to Overcome Fear of Success• Explain the Steps to Succeed and Overcome Failure• Explain the Steps to Identify Root Cause of Emotions• Explain how to Overcome Fear of Failure• Describe Role of Internal Beliefs in Success/Failures• Describe the Role of Self in Managing Success/Failures• List the Factors Affecting Attitude towards Success/Failure• Explain How to Enhance Your Self Esteem• List Assertions for Life and Workplace Success and Failures• Describe the Various Stress Management Techniques• Explain the Strategies to Manage Success/Failures• List the Traits for Efficient Managing of Success/Failures• List the Tips to Manage Your Success and Failure

Course Objectives

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Introduction• Look at the two men shown

on the screen.• This is Ralph Lauren and

that is Victor Green. They both are best friends.

• Let us see how Ralph and Victor’s life are in contrast to each other.

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Introduction

Ralph Lauren is the founder of a very famous and successful

company; Aegis Inc.

Aegis was one of the pioneers in providing online space to users for free data storage.

Ralph is an engineering graduate.

He has always been an outstanding student with

brilliant grades throughout his academic life.

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Introduction

Even before he had graduated, Ralph had joined the giant

software company IBM through campus placements.

At the age of just 32 years, Ralph had started his company

which not only made him extremely rich but also very

famous.

He is considered the most eligible bachelor and media

follow and report all his activities very diligently – both

personal and professional.

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Introduction

Victor works as a software tester in a small software company.

Victor has always found it hard to perform well at his job and

receives constant reprimands from his superiors for his poor

performance.

Victor is an engineering graduate.

Victor and Ralph were classmates in their engineering course.

However, Victor has always been an average student and never

received any commendable grades throughout his academic life.

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Introduction

Victor’s job is underpaid as he works in a small company that

cannot pay him the same salary levels that MNCs like IBM or

Microsoft would pay its software testers.

Owing to the kind of life that Victor has seen, he is unconfident

and stressed.

He knows that he has not been able to achieve the kind of success

that Ralph and many of his classmates have in their life.

He feels he is a failure.

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Introduction• You can clearly see that

Ralph is a great success and Victor is a great failure.

• Let us now try to understand how each one deals with his success and failure.

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Introduction

Ralph has seen huge success at a very young age.

Owing to his great success, Ralph has become a proud and

snobbish person.

He ill treats everyone around him including his friend Victor.

He feels that being successful has become second nature to

him and so has grown extremely over-confident and

careless.

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Introduction

Ralph ignores his work and does not concentrate on his

work anymore.

He keeps himself busy by leading an extravagant and

irresponsible life.

It is not too late before Ralph’s company goes downhill.

His company’s performance in the market and in turn his

wealth and reputation diminish.

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Introduction

On the other hand, Victor has never seen any great success in his

life.

He has always been considered a failure by others including him.

Owing to his failures at becoming a successful person in his life, Victor has become an unconfident and

shy person.

He is not able to perform well at his job and has been subjected to rebuke by his superiors, friends

and family.

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Introduction

He is constantly compared to his successful friends and is stressed

and bogged down by the feeling of being a failure.

Victor is not able to cope with his failures and gives up trying to

achieve more too.

He fears being a failure again if he tries anything new.

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Introduction

Therefore, you can understand that just being successful is not

enough.

You should know how to manage your success too or else things

could go downhill for you just as in Ralph’s case.

On the other hand, it is also very important that you learn to

manage your failures as the fear of failures would never allow you

to even try to be successful.

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Introduction

Therefore, you can understand that just being successful is not

enough.

You should know how to manage your success too or else things

could go downhill for you just as in Ralph’s case.

On the other hand, it is also very important that you learn to

manage your failures as the fear of failures would never allow you

to even try to be successful.

Let us now learn about ‘Managing Success and Failures’ in detail.

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Fears and Failures

The following is a list of the different types of fears that a person may develop as he sees failures in his life:

Fear

of

Reje

ction

Fear

of

Losi

ng

Cont

rol

Fear

of

Offe

ndin

g O

ther

s

Fear

of

Unc

erta

inty

Fear

of B

eing

Dis

liked

by O

ther

s

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Desires and Success

Desire for Riches

Desire for Power

Desire for Growth

Desire for Happiness

Desire for Pleasure

The following is a list of the different types of desires that a person may have that makes a person strive for success:

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Using Reflection to Handle Fear and Desires

You can use ‘reflection’ or ‘careful

thinking process’ to identify your

fears and desires.

These fears and desires are the things that are most crucial to you and you value in your life. These fears and desires are also the ones that most affect the way you deal with and feel about your success and failures.

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Managing Fear of SuccessSome people have fear of success such as:

Even if I succeed, I still won’t be happy.

I won’t be able to live up to the expectations.

The minute I achieve success I’ll probably

blow it.

Re-examine your vision of

success

Ask yourself if you have unrealistic expectations of yourself that are undermining your determination? Give yourself

permission to try new things, be creative and make mistakes.

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Role of Motivation for Success/Failure

Positive Motivation Negative Motivation

Positive motivation harnesses the power of positive thoughts and feelings to move you closer

to your goal.

Whereas, negative motivation is associated with low self esteem and takes you away from your

goals.

Desire to Succeed Fear of Failure

Goal

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Emotions in Managing Success/Failures

• When you understand the root cause of your emotions, you will know what makes you happy, sad, angry, depressed etc. when you are faced with success or failure.

• By becoming more self-aware, you will then be able to control these emotions by keeping a check on the triggers that cause these emotions.

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Identify the Root Cause of Each Emotion

Tag Your Emotions

Be Alert to Each Emotion in Real-time

Identify the Triggers to Each Emotion

Identify the Root Cause of Each Emotion

Identify Each Specific Emotion

Identify the Root Cause of Each Emotion

Now, the final step is getting to the ‘root cause’ of the emotion.

In order to get to the root of the emotion, you should drill down deep and look at the complete emotional story.

Many times, the emotion may only be the tip of the iceberg and there may be many other emotions and feelings hidden underneath.

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How to Deal with Negative EmotionsThere are a number of coping strategies to deal with negative emotions. These include:

• Learn – Notice how failures make you feel and which events trigger those failures so you can prepare in advance.

• Relax – Use pleasant activities like reading, walking or talking to a friend.

• Exercise – Aerobic activity lowers your level of stress chemicals and allows you to cope better with negative emotions.

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Uncertainty of Success leads to FailureYour failure may be triggered by confusion or uncertainty, of achieving success if:

You feel anger because you feel that someone wants you to achieve goals that they have set for you.

You do not have a clear understanding of your next steps.

You feel a sense of hopelessness.

You do not have a clear vision of your desired outcome.

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How can You Enhance Your Self Esteem?

Each of us is unique and have specific

talents and abilities

Manage yourself with success

Accept yourself as you are and come to terms with those aspects of

yourself that you cannot change

Always remember that ‘no one is

perfect’

There are a few ways in which you can enhance your self esteem, such as follows:

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• Different traits in a person help shape their complete personality. Personality plays a major role in the way a person may deal with his success or failure.

• You should always have a positive, cheerful, strong and confident personality in order to deal with your success or failure.

• Hence, Personality = Qualities + Abilities + Weaknesses

Personality in Dealing with Success/Failures

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Impact of Stress on Success and FailureThere is a very close relationship between the managing of success and failure and stress. Any individual who is at the peak of his success will be weighed down by the stress of keeping up the same performance and success levels. On the other hand, a person who has failed will also feel bogged down by the stress of overcoming his failures and succeeding.

However, stress has a direct adverse impact on the performance of an individual.

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Expressing Frustration in Healthy Ways

When you fail you may need to express your frustration. The following are a few suggestions on how to express your frustration in healthy ways :

If you feel out of control and feel like you are failing, walk away from the situation temporarily, until you cool down.

Recognise and accept the emotion as normal and part of life.

Try to pinpoint the exact reasons why you feel like you failed.

Once you have identified the problem of your failure, consider coming up with different strategies on how to remedy the situation and succeed in future.

Do something physical, such as going for a run or playing sport.

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Tips to Manage Your Success and FailureThe following are a few useful tips to manage your success and failure:

Self-Evaluation: The biggest reason that you are not able to handle your success and failures is because you yourself choose not to. You should remember that everything starts and ends with the self. So, the sooner you accept your fault, the better you’ll be able to manage your successes and failures.

Self-Assertion: Say to yourself, “I WANT TO SUCCEED”. Such assertions are important as once you accept that it is your fault, it becomes your weakness, the next step is to eliminate this weakness. Your desire to succeed and overcome failures should be sincere and must be started by changing small daily gestures.

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