Coos HS Training Handout 2015 -...

Conscious Discipline® was created by Dr. Becky Bailey

Conscious Discipline Teaches Adults to: • Access personal empowerment and model the skill of Composure through Active Calming • Build a bridge to even the most difficult child by using the Seven Powers to teach skills. • Build the School Family as a foundation for problem solving in conflict situations. • Identify Brain Smart™ Principles and use them to help create an optimal learning

environment

Conscious Discipline®: Skills and Powers.

Presented by: Annette Chastain, LCSW Conscious Discipline Certified Instructor

Transformative, brain-based, and practical Seven Skills of Discipline Provides adults with the seven discipline skills needed to effectively transform any problem into a life lesson.

The School Family Creates a positive school climate by eliminating reward and punishment in favor of the safety, connection and problem-solving of a School Family.

Seven Powers for Conscious Adults Perceptual shift that empowers us to see discipline encounters as an opportunity to teach new skills.

Brain State Model Addresses internal state first, using a neurodevelopment brain model, so adults and children may learn to self-regulate effectively.

Making the SHIFT from Control to Connection through structuring the program for success

Conscious Discipline® is a comprehensive classroom management program and social-emotional curriculum based on current brain research, child development information and developmentally appropriate practices. Conscious Discipline® has been specifically designed to make changes in the lives of adults first. The adults, in turn, change the lives of children.

consciousdiscipline.com 800-842-2846

http://consciousdiscipline.com


CD Powers & Skills_2015 Page �2


Brain Smart© Principles: Building Codes for Success

ACTIVITY TO UNITEBody Regulation - manage accelerator/brakeAttuned Communication - how to “dance” with others

ACTIVITY TO DISENGAGE STRESSOrganized/Balance Nervous System - emotional flexibilityResponse Flexibility - pause between impulse and action

ACTIVITY TO CONNECTFear Modulation - unlearning fear fibers to amygdalaEmpathy - understand responses of others/compassion

ACTIVITY TO COMMITMorality - acting for the higher social good even when alone

Interesting Facts

Two decades of research tell us that self-regulation is a better predictor of academic success then IQ or early reading and math skillsThe way parents treat each other is even more powerful for a child’s development of self-regulation than the way the parent treats the children. About 60% of adults report Adverse Childhood Experiences (Trauma) - Gerwin 2013Traumatic stress in childhood is the leading causes of morbidity, mortality and disability in the United States - Edwards, Shipman & BrownNearly 25% of children in the United States lived in poverty in 2013 (roughly 16.1 million children) and additional 45% of children live in low income homes - Jiang, Ekono & Skinner, 2014




Survival State: Safety and Composure Strategies

SMILE – Turns off the alarm so that all areas of the brain stay open. Just push the corners of the mouth up. That’s all it takes. TAKE A DEEP BREATH – Brings fresh oxygen into the body. Oxygen is brain food. AND RELAX – By relaxing your muscles, you’re able to further turn off the fight, flight, or surrender response. It helps to keep the executive state open and functioning so that you can problem solve. SAFE KEEPER

RITUAL My job is to keep you

SAFE. Your job is to help

keep it SAFE.




ASSERTIVENESSSaying “No” and being heard

ASSERTIVENESS - Setting Limits Respectfully An assertive voice is the VOICE OF KNOWING. It is clear, respectful, and lacks judgment. “Get that picked up now!” – Aggressive voice “Can you put it back please?” – Passive voice “Pick up the blocks. They go here.” – Assertive voice

BE CLEAR ABOUT WHAT YOU DO WANT - Focus on what you want to have happen. Instead of “don’t”, state what you do want in an assertive voice.

“Stop pushing” becomes “Put your hands down by your sides.” “I need you to (or please)” becomes “It’s time to…” or “It’s important to…”

ASSERTIVE COMMAND STEPS

Move to child Make eye contact State child’s name

Say what to do Use the Voice of Knowing

Practice: ACTIVITY TO PIVOT Step 1: Focus on what you don’t want in an upset tone Step 2: PIVOT - rotate on the balls of your feet and turn in the opposite direction Step 3: S.T.A.R. - and say “I’m safe. Keep breathing. I can handle this”. Step 4: Transform your statement to a positive statement of what you want the child to do.

Emotional State: RITUALS provide CONNECTION. CONNECTION is the key to COOPERATION.

Wish Well Twinkle Twinkle We wish you well. Twinkle twinkle little star We wish you well. What a wonderful child you are All through the day today With bright eyes and nice round cheeks We Wish You Well. A talented person from head to feet

Twinkle twinkle little star What a wonderful child you are.

Brain Hand-Story Hand Pinkie - Something I like to do

Ring Finger - Something I am good at I Love You Rituals Middle Finger - Someone I love (Cortico-Limbic Connections) Pointer Finger - Something I love to eat - Eye Contact Thumb - Something I am worried about - Touch I put my worry inside, take the fantastic - Presence things about me and surround my worry - In a playful situation



Skill Power Structure Key Phrases

ComposureBeing the person you want others to

PerceptionNo one can make you angry without your permission

• Friends and Family Board

• Safe Place• Brain Smart Start • Safe-keeper Ritual• Greeting/Goodbye

Rituals

• S.T.A.R. Smile, Take a breath And Relax

• I’m safe. Keep breathing. I can handle this

• Your arm is going like this (demonstrate)

AssertivenessSaying “no” and being heard: Setting limits respectfully

AttentionWhat you focus on, you get more of

• Visual Routines• Class-made Books• Time Machine• After Conflict

Reconnecting Ritual

• I’m going to ___• Did you like it?• Name, Verb, Paint for

assertive commands

EncouragementBuilding the School Family

UnityWe are all in this together

• Connecting Rituals• Ways to be Helpful

Board/Book• Job board

• You did it! Good for you!• You___ so ___. That

was helpful.

ChoicesBuilding self-esteem and willpower

Free WillThe only person you can make change is yourself

• Visual Rules• Behavior Charts

• You have a choice! You may ___ or ___. Which is better for you?

EmpathyTeaching children to manage their emotions

AcceptanceThis moment is as it is

• We Care Center • D = Your face is going like this (Demonstrate)

• N = You seem ___• A = You wanted ___. or

You were hoping ___.

Positive IntentCreating teaching moments with oppositional, shut down and aggressive children.

LoveSee the best in others.

• Celebration Center• School Family• Assemblies• Wishing Well

• You wanted___ (or you were hoping___). You may not ___. When you want___ say or do ___. say it now for practice

ConsequencesHelping children learn from their mistakes.

IntentionMistakes are opportunities to learn

• Time Machine• Class Meetings• Class Meeting

Rituals

• Did you like it?• Are you telling me to be

helpful or hurtful?• You have a choice, you

can choose to ___ and ___ or you can choose to ___ and ___

• Tell me what will happen if you ___ again?

• I can see by your actions you are choosing to___.





Encouragement: Building the School FamilyMEANINGFUL JOBS AND ENCOURAGING LANGUAGE

PURPOSE OF WORK ØSignificant contributor ØJob description of being helpful ØTeaches responsibility ØBuilds self-worth

A JOB FOR EVERY CHILD EVERY

STAR helperKindness RecorderWish Well OrganizerMedicElectricianPhotographerMaterials Manager

YOU DID IT! You _____ so that ______.

That was ______. (helpful, thoughtful, kind, wise, responsible)

-put your things away -lined up safely -passed the tray -moved over -gave her a turn when she asked

State the affirmation that supports your child’s effort, “you did it”. State what your child did and its effect, “you ___ so ____”. End with a value that was honored, “that was ___”.



Language of Powerlessness Language of Responsibility and choice

I should contribute to that potluck on Friday I am willing to contribute to that potluck on Friday

Don’t make me pull this car over I’m going to pull the car over until the seatbelt are on and everyone is safe

I made my husband go to the show It took a little persuasion, but he decided to go with me

He is doing that just to make me mad That is a trigger for me, I feel angry right now.


Choices: Building Self-esteem and WillpowerEmpathy: Teaching Children to Manage Their Emotions

The Power of Free Will: Who is in charge of you?

You have a choice! Step 1: Breath, what do you want the child to do? Step 2: Tell the child “You have a choice” in an upbeat tone Step 3: Clearly state the two choices: “You may ___ or you may ___.” Step 4: Complete the process by asking the child for a commitment. “What is your choice?” Step 5: Notice the child’s choice. “You chose ___”.

When to use two choices: help upshift from the emotional state to an executive state. Not helpful when the child is in survival state!

Feelings are the bridge between problems an solutions.




When children are upset: Our job is to act as a mirror

Survival State: D: Describe – “Your arms are going like this.” Emotional State: N: Notice – “You seem… .” Executive State: A: Acknowledge – “You wanted…?”

Child Words Adult Reflections“You can’t make me” “You seem angry”“I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to do” “It scary when things seem out of

our control”‘I hate you” “You seem angry“You’re always picking on me” “You seem afraid that I don’t like you”




Problem Solving: Positive Intent and Consequences

POSITIVE INTENT - Teach instead of judge. SUSPEND JUDGMENT AND WISH WELL - Attributing positive intent creates teaching moments by transforming resistance into cooperation.

LOOK PAST THE BEHAVIOR AND SEE WHAT IS NEEDED - What we think we understand by what we see isn’t always what is really going on. Behavior is purposeful. Ask, “Does this child need information, comfort, or time to recover?” That question will help guide adults to a deeper understanding and an ability to help. Conflict is always an opportunity to teach.

Situation: A child grabs something away from another child. Adult: S.T.A.R., wish you and child well. Intent: You wanted _______________________ so you ______________. You didn’t know what else to do. Limit: You may not __________________. _________________ hurts (- value). Teach: When you want ________________________________ say (or do) _____________________________________________________. Practice: Say it now (child repeats words or actions).



I am willing to _______________________________________

__________________________________________________

Signature __________________________________________

Date _____________________________


COMMITMENTS

Activity to Commit: Commitments produce serotonin, and teaches responsibility. The brain is pattern seeking and survival oriented. • Conscious Discipline is about helping

children be successful• Making commitments increases the

likelihood of a person being successful• Making and keeping commitments

raises serotonin in the brain!

What is the plan?

Conscious Discipline Commitment: I dedicate this time to becoming a more conscious and compassionate personWILLingly I provide safety, support and structure for the children in my careREMEMBERing always that what I offer to others I strengthen in myself. May I never forget thatMY worth depends on seeing theWORTH in others

Brain Smart StartI will ______________________________________________

S.T.A.R. (S.T.A.R. Wand Breaks)I will ______________________________________________

Safe KeeperI will ______________________________________________________________

Change my inner speech (oops I made a mistake)I will _______________________________________________

Greetings and Good-ByesI will _______________________________________________

Wish Well and Welcome BackI will _______________________________________________

I Love You RitualsI will _______________________________________________

A job for every child every dayI will _______________________________________________

Encouraging Language “You did it!”I will _______________________________________________

I Wish You Well, Annette Chastain ([email protected])


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Coos HS Training Handout 2015 -...

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