Castaway Sociosphere 1.13

8/18/2019 Castaway Sociosphere 1.13

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THE COUNCILLORS OF CANKCORE HIGH

byKyle Hasegawa

(C) 2015 Cannot be duplicated with explicit permission from author


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OVER BLACK;

SUPER: IN THE DEPTHS OF THE SOUTH WING, A BLADDER WAS FULL

Footsteps. Running. Breathing.

EXT. WALKWAYS OF CANKCORE HIGH - DAY

A COURIER (14, starry-eyed innocence) drags a tiny, one-maninflatable boat by a tether through the outside walkways ofan high school campus.

He trips and scrapes his knees near a graffitied wall:

bellum omnium in omnes

He screams. He gets up.

EXT. BOYS RESTROOM - DAY

Urine seeps out of the bottom of the door to the boysbathroom.

BARK BARK!

MEX (O.S.)Plenty of fish in the sea. But we’re not in the sea. We’re beingflushed. With our owner’s piss.Entiendes, Gaucho?

GAUCHO THE CHIHUAHUA rests on MEX THE MEXICAN’S (17)shoulder. Mex adjusts his fedora.

The Courier, knees dripping blood, hauls the boat to Mex.

COURIERCouncillor.

MEXThat’ll do, Timmy.

COURIERTommy, Councillor. Sorry,

Councillor. The south wing lavs,Councillor, they’ve been flooded.Flooded with peee—

MEXThat’ll do, Timmy.


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COURIERYes, Councillor sir!

INT. BOYS RESTROOM - DAY

Dark. Cavernous. Drip. Drop.

The sound of a match trying to light. Then, a spark!

MEXDon’t let me down, amigo.

Mex swipes his phone and a match app lights up. The lightreveals a graffitied bathroom with Mex paddling in the boatacross a knee-deep flood of piss.

IN A STALL

Mex sets a toilet seat down. It’s covered in pee.

MEXWhat do you make of that, Gaucho?Pee pee on the wee wee. Someone didthis on purpose. Someone’s pissed.

Mex stands and unzips pants to pee.

MEXMaking me nervous, Gaucho.

Gaucho BARKS.

MEXUnlike you, I’m a little shy.

Something catches his eye on the wall. He brings his phone’slight closer to the graffiti on the wall:

“CINDY SCOTT” (PENIS) “THE PHOTO TEACH”

(Note: The (PENIS) is a drawing of a penis)

He runs his finger across the graffiti. The ink smudges.

MEX

Shit.

INT. THE DARK ROOM - DAY

Red lights illuminate this photography dark room.

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A picture of the “Cindy Scott” graffiti appears on a cellphone. JESSKA glares at it. She’s a tall teen with a bitchface and little natural beauty.

Jesska looks to Mex. Mex nods.

Jesska looks to FITCH: godlike, always shirtless, Roman-statue-curly-hair hair. Fitch takes a marker and crosses outa photo taped to the wall of a slutty teen making a duckface, CINDY SCOTT.

The room is decorated with photos of crossed-out teens.

Jesska looks to the fourth person in the room, CATHY, super-duper pretty and wears glasses with lenses popped out.

Cathy doesn’t react. Jesska tries to signal her with hereyes, but Cathy just nods back.

JESSKA

My gods, Cathy. Who doth remain?

CATHYOh. Well she was like, the last oneon our okayed list. Who says sheslept with a Teach any—

JESSKA Cathy.

CATHYSure. This rumor hath legit-ness?Or whatevereth?

FITCHYes. And what impelled thee toenter the bathroom of piss?

MEXI had to pee. And a rumor sosecluded must hath credence.

CATHYThere hath remaineth but one mysterious candidate. Petris Munn.

JESSKA I do not trust the silent enigmaroutine. Remindeth me of middleschool.

MEXHe gains a following. The shrug heinventedst.

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JESSKA The shrug?

EXT. MAIN SQUARE - OVERLOOK - DAY

PETRIS MUNN (16, ambiguously foreign) does a signature shrug.

INT. THE DARK ROOM - DAY

Fitch pulls down a photo of Petris from the wall — the onlyphoto not crossed out. Fitch raises his hand.

FITCHCoronation is coming. After you-know-who, we have need of a safereplacement for reelection. ThisPetris is clean. A nobody.

Cathy and Mex have their hands raised.

JESSKA Dost thou want my vote?

A brief stare between the Fitch and Jesska.

JESSKA Begin ye the initiation.

The normal lights turn on. The PHOTO TEACH, with spiked hairstraight out of the 90s, comes in.

PHOTO TEACHWhat’s up! What are you dudesdoing? Class hasn’t started yet.

CATHYJust chillin’, Teach.

INT. DARK COORIDOR - DAY

Petris Munn dashes around a corner into a dark hallway.Directly behind him is an equally scrawny black kid, DAVONTHE BLACK. They are sprinting from A DARK PRESENCE — its

shadow creeping around the corner.

Petris tries a door, locked. Another across the hall. Locked.Davon finds an open locker.

DAVONThe lockers.

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Petris heads towards Davon, but he slips on something greasy.Petris falls down.

DAVONPetris!

Petris shakes his head. Davon hides inside the locker,looking through the slits.

A shadow looms over Petris.

DARK PRESENCE (O.S.)Not even going to put up a fight?

Petris shrugs. The hallway lights up. The Dark Presence isgone. Davon exits the locker.

DAVONWhat was that? Where’d he go?

Petris shrugs. Davon helps Petris up.

DAVONStuffing ourselves into lockers.Perks of being a junior.

EXT. MAIN SQUARE - DAY

Students hang out in the main square during their break:

--JOCKS touch each other’s muscles...--DANCE TEAM dances...

--MEXICANS throw up gang signs...--the slutty Cindy Scott and her LIBERATED WOMYN’S FACTION take off their clothes...--FATSO and his FAT GANG eat and rub their bellies...--THE TURBO NERDS adjust their glasses and neon clothes.

PETER THE PHOTOGRAPHER, photographs Cindy Scott.

CINDY SCOTTGet out of here, creep.

PETERPhoto for the school paper.

Cindy Scott and her Womyn pull down their shirts to expose what little cleavage they have. CLICK!

The library is at one side of the main square, with a raisedplatform overlooking the square.

FROM THE OVERLOOK,

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Petris squints at the students below. Deep. Pensive.

DAVON (O.S.)Did you hear me?

Petris shrugs.

DAVONOf course you did. But I ask thatquestion because I’m looking for aresponse. You know, with words?

Petris shifts his eyes.

DAVONYou’ve heard them, haven’t you? The whispers.

Petris nods.

DAVONOnce again, with words, peanut-dick. What do the whispers say?

Petris types on his phone. Davon receives a text.

(Note: text messages appear on screen.)

PETRIS: Councillor

DAVONShit. That’s why that Freak didn’tgrease you. The Council is starting

to notice us. Maybe we aren’tnobodies anymore.

Petris looks away.

DAVONI’m sorry, what does slight turn ofhead to the left mean again?

PETRIS: they want me

DAVONScrew you. They’re afraid of us.

You. Me. Anita. Katie. Coronationis coming. They see our power.

PETRIS: A seed. Change. Reformation. From the inside.

Petris looks down to Davon’s socks and sandals.

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DAVONSandals with socks. Pajama Fridays.The front steps. What else havethey done to us?

PETRIS: i can chagne things

DAVONYou can’t chag-knee things bybecoming one of them. That onlyends up with you becoming one ofthem. You’re quiet, not retarded.

PETRIS: change

DAVONWe’re better than this. Stuck uphere with the Flossers and JennyWho Smells Like Pasta?

Also in this overlook area are long-haired weirdos who floss,FLOSSER ONE and TWO, and JENNY, who eats alone.

Petris texts, but Davon swats his phone away.

DAVONFisticuffs, you pretentious poser.

Davon raises his fists. Davon and Petris shadowbox, complete with dorky sound effects. Petris is more nimble and defensive while Davon is fierce and strong, despite his weak arms.

PETER (O.S.)

Councillors approaching!

Davon and Petris stop. Fitch, Cathy, Mex, and Jesska marchthrough the square as students around them salute. They stopto look up at Petris. Peter photographs them.

JESSKA Petris Munn. You’ve been selectedto join the High Council ofCankcore High. You do not have achoice in the matter. Yourinitiation begins immediately. You must pass four tests, one for each

of Councillor: I, Jesska the Bitch,Fitch the Adonis, Mex the Mexican,and Cathy Who Is Just ReallyPretty.

The Council leaves.

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Whispers. The students in the main square “PSS-PSS” intotheir cuffed hands. Petris walks away.

DAVONHey. Hey!

PETRIS: a house’s walls are set in stone, but you can paintover them

DAVONWhat?

PETRISThere’s something wrong with thisschool. I’m going to fix it.

Petris leaves through the main square, the crowd watching.The school bell blares a grim tone and everyone scatters.

OVER BLACK;

SUPER: THE MEXICAN’S TEST

The bell screeches again.

INT. ENGLISH CLASS - DAY

A frog screeches for survival. Holding it is Mr. Munn: 40s,bald, fat, and doesn’t care.

MR. MUNN

Just pick it up, and...

He slices its throat, ending the squeals.

MR. MUNNMurder it.

Mex, in the back of the class, writes a lengthy, detailednote, though we can’t see what is written. Mr. Munn lectures:

MR. MUNNIn chapter one of Lord of theFlies, Jack is unable to kill...

Mex passes the note to the NOTE PASSER next to him. It hopsthrough a chain of people, sometimes in counter-intuitivedirections. PASSER 2 receives the note. He coughs andindiscreetly passes it to PASSER 3 in front.

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MR. MUNNSee what emotions you call up whenyou slice your knife...

Passer 3 attempts to pass it to PASSER 4 (Todd) beside him.

PASSER 3Todd. Todd. Todd. TODD. Todd. Tood.Toad. Todd. Todd. Todd. TODD.

Passer 4 takes the note and places it on Petris’ desk. Petrisstares at his frog who stares back.

MR. MUNNAnd what do you think about that,Petris?

Petris looks up to see Mr. Munn by his desk. Everyone in theclass is staring at him. Mex glares. Mr. Munn grabs the note.

MR. MUNNIf you can see me, I can see you.

Before trashing the note, Mr. Munn peeks inside.

MR. MUNNThis one of your hilarious jokes,Mex?

MEXJust murdering frogs here, Teach.

Mex tries to squeeze his frog to death, but it slips out.

Mr. Munn holds up the note. It only says “hey.” Whispers.

MR. MUNNHey? Was the Rube Goldbergnecessary for a “hey?” Why is itthat your generation skips past alllogic—

The PSS PSS PSS whispers grow louder.

MR. MUNNWhat are you doing? Quiet!

Petris looks back to Mex who squints back, waiting. Petrisbreathes deep and keeps his cool. He texts on his phone.

Petris types: “you too.” He erases it. “u 2.” Erases. “yootwo.” Petris sweats. He erases it.

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Mex’s phone lights up. A message from Petris: “hey.” Mex nodsto Petris. Petris nods back. PSS PSS PSS.

INT. FREAKS’ HALLWAY - DAY

PSSSS. A FREAK sprays “drugs” onto a locker. Tall, lanky,eyes yellow, hair dripping... this Freak is inhuman.

Voices down the hallway:

DAVON (O.S.)Did you hear?

Davon walks down the brighter side of the hallway,accompanied by:

KATIE, Cathy’s identical twin with a more frumpy look withoutglasses,

and ANITA ARORA, small Indian girl with glasses.

ANITA It seems he passed Mex’sinitiation.

DAVONIf you’ve heard that, the wholeschool has. We need to plan.

ANITA Plan for what?

The hallway gets progressively darker the further they walk.

DAVONOur Berkeley applications. Jesus,Anita.

ANITA (insulted)

Berkeley?

KATIEStop leeching off your ex-friend’spopularity.

DAVONEx-friend? Leeching?

KATIEHe’s one of them now. Deal with it.

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DAVONWe have a genius and a Councillor’ssister. And—

KATIEAnd you’re a nobody leeching offyour ex-friend’s popularity.

DAVONThey want him because they’reafraid of us banding together.

ANITA Seriously, Berkeley?

Davon bumps into the Freak. Davon looks around. The hallwayis dark. Lights flickering. Graffiti on the walls.

DAVONI thought something smelled like

ass.

ANITA What happened to B Wing?

FREAK ONEFreak Territory.

ANITA We’re so sorry. We didn’t know—

FREAK ONESorry ain’t gonna cut it for three

nobodies.

DAVONDo you know who we are? We are partof Petris Munn’s crew. Squad.Formation.

FREAK ONEWho is Petris Munn?

Davon does the Petris Shrug.

FREAK ONE

That shrug. I recognize that shrug.

DAVONBetter think twice before greasingup friends of a potential.

FREAK ONEStill three nobodies to me.

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The Freak runs his hand through his hair. A ball of greaseaccumulates the size of a baseball. The three step back.

KATIEI hear it’s good for your pores.

ANITA Maybe we can talk ourselves out ofthis one.

FREAK ONE‘Fraid you’re gonna need some deusex machina to get outta this one.

The Freak sniffs. Something in the air. Anita loses herbreath. She inhales through her nose and moans.

ANITA The antiperspirant of the gods.

An aura of light shines from down the hall. It’s Fitch.

FREAK ONECouncillor Fitch. Greasin’ up thesethree nobodies.

FITCHThat won’t be necessary, Freak.They aren’t worth the time.

FREAK ONEAdmissible, sir!

Fitch goes on his way, but Davon blocks his path. Shock fromeveryone. Fitch looks over the three:

FITCHYou’re Cathy’s little twin sister?And Anita Arora? I heard about yourA in Ms. Klasky’s class.Impressive. Shame what happened.

Anita is red and nods.

FITCHA daunting duo you two make.

(to Davon)But who are you to do something sostupid? A transfer?

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DAVONWe have P.E. together, Fitch. I’mDavon Summers, and your blackestnightmare, you false god. I knowyour scheming...

FITCHFreak. Grease just this one.

DAVON...and you don’t frighten—

With the slightest of movements, Fitch backhands Davon,thrusting and imprinting him into the lockers. Fitch leaves.

The Freak twirls his hair, flipping grease everywhere. Hepulls Davon out of the locker and slams the grease ball onhis head. It oozes like an egg down his body. Davon shudders.

The Freak pulls out a vial of white goop and shows the girls.

FREAK ONECan I interest you girls in someZac? Low price. Makes you die.

KATIEI’ll die on my own time rather thanon your slime, Freak.

FREAK ONEWell, too-da-lee-loo.

The Freak exits. Grease seeps into Davon’s mouth.

INT. CAFETERIA - DAY

FLOSSER’S TABLE

A set of perfect teeth. Flosser One pulls out a square meshof floss from his pocket and hands it to Flosser Two, whouses this it to floss all his top teeth at once.

FLOSSER TWOLife's a web.

FLOSSER ONEDon't. Get. Caught.

CUT TO:

Corn mush is slapped onto Petris’ tray, next to a piece ofcardboard. The cafeteria is packed with students.

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Petris locks eyes with Cathy across the room. She sits withher fellow dance squad.

Petris sees an empty table. As he approaches, Fatso and hisFat Gang take it up. Another empty table. He approaches.Cindy Scott pops in front of him.

CINDY SCOTTHeard you’re trying to fill my spoton the Council, Petris Munn.

PETRISHeard a lot of people are trying tofill your spot these days, Cindy.

CINDY SCOTTYou’re developing quite a mouth. Ilike that in a man. However, thistable is taken.

Her Liberated Womyn toss their bras to claim the table.Petris goes to the Flossers, who floss.

PETRISFloss me.

Flosser One takes out a floss cartridge. Petris swipes it andthrows it across the room. The Flossers chase after it.

Petris sits. Cathy joins him with the same corn lunch.

CATHYNice lunch.

PETRISMmm.

They eat corn.

CATHYSo, what kinda bands do you like?

PETRISWhatever.

CATHY

You were friends with my sister?Katie.

Petris shrugs.

CATHYShe ever talk about her big coolCouncillor sis?

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PETRISNah.

Cathy slams her fist into the tray, launching up corn.Several students in the cafeteria do the same.

Petris grabs his piece of cardboard and nibbles at it. Cathydoes the same. It becomes a contest. He bites, she bites. He moans, she moans. They finish.

CATHYYou’re pretty cool. I admit that.

PETRISSure.

CATHYI guess I’m going to go.

She gets up.

CATHYYou like, passed, or whatever.The initiation thing.

PETRISMmmhmm.

Cathy leaves. Petris gags. Petris smiles.

OVER BLACK;

SUPER: TWO DOWN; TWO TO GO

INT. GYM - DAY

Jesska and Fitch are on one side of the gym, flirting.

A P.E. T-shirt reads “Davon Summers.” Davon’s weak black armsflex as hard as they can. An anger boils in Davon’s eyes. He marches in front of his DODGEBALL TEAM, opposite Fitch’s.

Anita is also on Davon’s team. Her P.E. shirt reads “AnitaArora” with the “a”s blacked out.

DAVONHold your ground! Hold your ground!Fatties, uglies, freaks,cheerleaders, turbo nerds— mybrothers! I see in your eyes thesame indifference that once plagued me.

(MORE)

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A day may come when our kind idlybends the knee to those that wishto subjugate us, but today is notthat day. Dodgeball may not be yourforte—

ANITA It’s pronounced “fort.”

DAVONAnita! Being the only black kid inthis school, sometimes peopleexpect me to have a Lebron schlongor be good at sports, but I don’tand am not. Or rather, who knows?Maybe I do. Penis size doesn’t matter.

ANITA That’s not what surveys say.

DAVONThe point is, I am not what theysay about me. I am a person. They do not own me.

Jesska and Fitch flirt and ignore Davon’s ramblings.

DAVONThey don’t own me.

(beat)Not in a like a black slave way.

The Dodgeball Team is relieved.

DAVONForget it. CHARGE.

Davon’s team begins their charge, but the fat PHYS-ED TEACHblows the whistle and forces them back. Davon’s team trudgesback to the wall.

She blows the whistle again.

The two teams rush towards the center of the court. Fitchdoesn’t move, more curious about his nail.

Jesska and Davon head for the same ball. Jesska’s hand swipesthe ball from Davon’s grasp. She smiles wickedly as she windsup for a throw.

Davon panics, no time to get back. He limbos backwards.Jesska’s ball glides over his body, missing. Davon falls onhis back.

DAVON (CONT'D)

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Jesska grunts. They both head back to their respective sides.

On Davon’s side, there’s the fat kid, Fatso, with two ballsin hand.

DAVONBall me, Fatso.

FATSOStay on target.

FATSO’S POV

Fitch stands still, but his sight wobbles around trying tostay centered on Fitch.

FATSO (O.S.)Stay on target.

OUT OF POV

Without looking, Fitch puts his arm out and catches Fatso’sball. Fatso slumps in disbelief.

Jesska laughs. She bites her lip admiring Fitch’s chest.WHOOSH! A ball misses her face, the force blowing herponytail. She gasps.

Davon charges down the court, one more ball in hand. Helaunches—

SMACK! Right in Jesska's face. She grinds her teeth.

JESSKA FITCH!

Fitch loosens up as Jesska stomps off. He catches a balleffortlessly and barrels it down the court. A HOPELESS SOULis hit and thrown off his feet.

SLOOOW-MO

Balls fly light-speed past Davon. Screams are heard frombehind. Fitch rockets out another ball. It makes the sound ofa tank firing.

Anita, love-struck by Fitch, is hit and goes flying.

Sounds of screams, helicopters rotors, bullets, andexplosions a la a World War II film.

Davon looks around. The entire team crawls on the floor.

END SLOOOW-MO

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From the ground, Anita puts out her arm, trying to reachDavon. Her glasses are cracked and broken.

ANITA For...feit.

DAVONIt’s pronounced “never.”

Fitch and Davon are the last ones on the court. A dodgeballtumbles like a tumbleweed across the gym.

The MARCHING BAND marches into the gym playing the Game ofThrones theme (though it’s hard to really say it’s the themeand not a concert of poorly timed farts).

Fitch kicks a ball to his hands. He smiles.

ZOOM! The ball rockets towards Davon. Davon dodges. The ballexplodes on the gym wall.

Whispers. PSS PSS PSS.

Fitch has one ball in hand.

Davon sees three balls in front of him. He rolls, grabs one,launches, PHWOOSH! He breakdances on the ground, grabs thesecond, tosses, BZOOM!

Fitch dodges the first. He blocks the second with his ball inhand, staggering back.

Out of nowhere, a third ball heads straight for Fitch's face.

The marching band finishes, ending on a dreadful note.

BAM! The ball connects with Fitch’s face, but impossiblyhovers in front of it.

What? says Davon’s face.

Shining teeth grasp onto the red ball. Fitch opens his mouth,and the ball drops into his hands. Davon freezes.

Fitch lofts two balls into the air. As they reach their apex,Fitch's upside-down foot connects with the first ball. An

impossible feat, Fitch does a double (upside-down) bicyclekick. In air, he smacks the second ball with his other foot.

The two balls batter Davon. He flies back off his feet, andhits the ground hard.

FITCH (O.S.)You toss balls like Cindy Scott.

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The gym lights create a godlike aura around Fitch. Fitchlends his hand to Davon. Davon doesn’t accept.

FITCHIt’s a compliment, Summers.

DAVONGee, thanks. Hey, do you mindbacking up a bit? Your odor isstarting to asphyxiate me.It’s a compliment.

Fitch smiles. The whispering dies down. The bell rings.

EXT. SUBURBAN SIDEWALK - DAY

Petris follows Katie down a sidewalk, staring from behind.They have their backpacks on. They text:

KATIE: things are such bullshit sometimes

PETRIS: yeh

KATIE: haha lol

PETRIS: haha lol

(Neither Katie nor Petris smiles or laughs)

KATIE: do you think we’ll hang out after you become aCouncillor?

PETRIS: we’d still have to walk home in the same direction

KATIE: i mean davon and anita too

PETRIS: oh, who cares really

KATIE: i do i guess

Petris stares down at his phone, unphazed.

Zoom on the “i do i guess.” Closer and closer.

PETRIS: haha whatever (donkey emoticon)

KATIE: haha

Petris stops in front of a house. Katie slows down.

KATIE: your dad home?

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INT. PETRIS’ ROOM - DAY

Petris refills a glass with whisky, then coke. He hands it toKatie and takes his own.

They sit on his bed. Petris’ room is sparse: sun stains onthe walls show where posters used to be, empty bookcase.

Katie’s shaky hand spills a bit. She snickers, but quicklysuppresses it.

Katie bursts into tears, bawling loud, wet sobs. Petrisglances her way, reactionless, and nudges away from her. Hegets up and tours his room. He picks a penny from the ground,inspecting it over Katie’s chorus of wails.

Katie’s cries stop. Her face is red and filled with tears.

KATIE(completely normal)

I gotta go. See ya.

INT. CATHY’S HOUSE - DAY

Mex writes on a pad. It’s a brainstorming web that says“JOKES” at the top. In the center it says “Cumin” with arrowsleading out to “Cumming?” then “cum” and “semen.”

Mex douses pasta with cumin and sriracha. He mixes and takesthe pot to the seated Councillors: Jesska, Fitch, and Cathy.

MEX

Cock sauce pasta. Cummin pasta.Pasta con cummin. Cummin in yourcock sauce pasta. No? Nothing?

JESSKA You’re not funny. It’s cyoomin.

CATHYCoomin.

FITCHAll three are correct. Sit down.

Fitch, Mex, and Jesska serve themselves.

CATHYWhy hath we gathered in my abode?

Jesska shows a picture of a confused Davon on her phone.

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JESSKA Know who this is?

MEXDue to the nature of his skin, Iassume he’s not from this school.

FITCHHe is. Davon Summers.

CATHYA black kid in our school?

JESSKA Almost beat Fitch in dodgeball.

The table goes silent. Fitch eats pasta.

FITCHAlmost. Pass the cock sauce.

MEXWhy should we care?

JESSKA He’s Petris’ friend, and he doesn’tlike our choice of futureCouncillor.

FITCHIt’ll wash over once the initiationis complete.

JESSKA We need to take care of him now.He’s a nobody. That could bedangerous. My web of spies hadnothing on him.

CATHYIf he’s friends with Petris, that means my sister must know him.

Katie enters the house. Cathy and Katie stare for a longtime. Katie takes a slab of meat out of the fridge and bitesa chunk out of it, still staring. Katie goes to the guest

bathroom. Cathy sighs.

CATHYMy sister knows him very well.Maybe—

We hear Katie peeing. Cathy grabs her head, aching.

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CATHYWe can get her to like—

Katie exits the bathroom (no flush, no faucet). She sniffsher hand, staring at Cathy. She exits upstairs.

JESSKA Are you going to ask her?

CATHYWhat? No, forget it. She can’thelp. It doesn’t matter. Fuck!

JESSKA Christ, Cathy, you’re useless.

FITCHHe’s a nobody. No need to gut him.

JESSKA

Do none of you realize howimportant this is? We’re beingoverthrown.

FITCHDo you want another candidate?

JESSKA There are no other candidates. AndPetris is fine, it’s just thisDavon that is trouble. After you-know-who, we have lost the trust ofthe student body. You almost got

beat in dodgeball today. Cathy isborderline retarded. Mex’s dog isfunnier than him.

Gaucho looks at the pasta on Mex’s plate, too tired to eat.

FITCHAnd you’re the bitch, but insteadof being cute about it, you’re justa bitch.

JESSKA We’re vulnerable. Coronation is

coming. Won’t be so nonchalant when we start taking orders from Fatsoand his Fat Gang or Cindy’sLiberated Whores. What if Anitajoins the Turbo Nerds? And ifpeople start learning about thisDavon—

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FITCHDavon won’t amount to anything.Ambitious, but not a threat.

Jesska takes a bite of pasta, then throws her plate aside.

JESSKA I don’t need your vote.

Jesska leaves.

INT. MUNN KITCHEN - DAY

Mr. Munn and Petris eat plain rice with their hands.

MR. MUNNWhat was with that note today? Youfriends with Mex now?

Petris shrugs.

MR. MUNNDoes that make you one of the coolkids?

PETRISIt’s not like that.

MR. MUNNI don’t understand why the class isso afraid to answer. In fact, Idon’t understand anything about you

guys. I mean, what is going on? I walked by a student bathroomyesterday, and there was urinecoming out of it. Urine, Petris.Does that make sense to you?

Petris doesn’t answer.

MR. MUNNIt doesn’t even matter if you’reright, you know? If the other kidssee you responding, then they’llrealize it’s okay to just try.

PETRISI’m not even a Councillor yet!

MR. MUNNWhat?

Petris’ phone lights up. He checks it:

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UNKNOWN: Your friend is in danger.

UNKNOWN: Dayvaughn?

UNKNOWN: The black one.

MR. MUNNWhat’s so important?

PETRISNothing.

MR. MUNNAs usual, right? You’re like arobot sometimes.

PETRISSure.

Mr. Munn cleans his hands.

MR. MUNN(sudden caring tone)

Listen. Petris. I know...

Petris stares at Mr. Munn.

MR. MUNNI know... these past... years—

PETRISWhat are you doing?

MR. MUNNI’m saying something. I’m trying tosay something to you

PETRISNo. What? No.

Petris gets up.

MR. MUNNThis is important. It would mean alot—

PETRISI have a big day tomorrow.

MR. MUNNListen to me.

PETRISI’m can’t. I’m a robot.

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Petris acts like a robot.

MR. MUNNWhat are you doing?

PETRISRobutt. Beep boop.

MR. MUNNYou’re going to look back and valuethese—

Petris makes fart sounds. He exits.

MR. MUNNI’m a person too, you know!

PETRIS (O.S.)Learn to fucking cook.

Mr. Munn eats rice. He covers his face and sobs.

INT. PETRIS’ ROOM - NIGHT

Black, necrotic flesh covers someone’s chest, a malady out ofa horror film. The ribs seem ready to break through the skin.

This is Petris’ chest. He’s not too shocked, like he has abad zit on picture day. He pulls out his phone and takes aselfie. He puts down his shirt and stares into the mirror.

INT. PIZZA DA CIAO’S - NIGHT

Heavy eyeliner/eyeshadow covers Jesska’s eyes. She’sdisguised: hair down, hood up, Cathy’s glasses on. She sitsin front of a mushroom-pepperoni pizza.

MR. CHO (50s, Asian) tosses pizza dough in this desolatefamily pizza joint.

Fatso slinks into the joint. Jesska signals him over. He sitsacross from her.

FATSO

Couldn't we do this over the phone?

JESSKA And give you my phone number?

FATSOAll I’m saying is—

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JESSKA Shut up. Would you like some pizza?

FATSOI'm not hungry.

JESSKA Please, Fatso of the Fat Gang—

FATSOMy name is Eli. Eli of theElephantine Esquires.

She pushes the pizza in front of him. He takes a slice.

FATSOWhat do you want?

Jesska waits.

FATSOLet's just say I do have some dirt.What do I get out of this?

JESSKA This would go quicker if you didn’tunderestimate me on any level.

Fatso puts down the pizza. He looks down.

FATSO(nervous)

I want to know who Cindy has a

crush on.

Jesska smiles and texts on her phone.

JESSKA She's out of your league.

FATSOIs that a problem?

JESSKA Cindy Scott, Cindy with freckles,or Cindy who is actually Sydney?

FATSOCindy Scott! How could you know ifshe was out of my league if youdidn't know which Cindy I meant?

Jesska reads something from her phone.

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JESSKA Cindy recently broke up with KyleGertsmann for Omar Selick thesenior. Though there's a rumorflying around that it's anelaborate ruse to hide the factthat she's into Cally Peckins.

FATSOShe's a lesbian?

JESSKA If that’s what being into girls means.

Jesska finds the picture of the graffiti Cindy Scott rumor.

JESSKA Oh right. Another rumor that she’sinto the Photo Teach.

FATSOImpossible. Photo Teach is gay.

JESSKA What?

FATSOHe does the dick. Is yourinformation credible?

JESSKA Don’t insult me, Fatso. Now tell me

what you know, and if it's good,I'm throwing in the pepmush.

INT. MAIN SQUARE - OVERLOOK - DAY

Early morning. Petris looks out over the main square. Empty.Petris smells something. He turns around. It’s Fitch.

FITCHYou want to ask if I ever get cold.The answer is I don’t. You enteredCankcore High a nobody. It seems

your indifference started to catchon. Laconic enigma. Textbook. You want to ask about Davon the Black.

Petris swallows. Fitch comes closer.

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FITCHThat’s what they call him now. It’sinflated his already big ego. If hecontinues, he’s going to be a lot worse than when he was a nobody.Jesska can make sure of that.

Petris says nothing.

FITCHAre you distracted by my perfectphysique? Or do you think your lackof personality counts as one?

PETRISIs this part of the initiation?

FITCHThere is no initiation. It’s all ajoke. Formalities.

PETRISA joke? This isn’t a joke. Ineed...

FITCHYou need this? Why? Don’t answer. Iknow. You’re a book, Petris. It makes you feel important, loved,alive. Better. Just know you’renone of those things. That’s thereal joke. It’s also why Davon theBlack must stop his protest. The

future has been decided.

PETRISWhy are you helping him? That’sawfully nice of our benevolentdeity.

FITCHI prefer your silence to yoursarcastic angst. Just accept thatI’m helping you both.

PETRIS

Cancelling Pajama Fridays. Closingoff the front steps. The Freakshave overrun any wing underconstruction. The bathrooms areflooded in piss. Me and my nobodyfriends have to hide up here justto stay sane.

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FITCHAnd you think you can CHANGE theSYSTEM?

Fitch’s booming voice echoes through the square.

PETRISDramatic.

FITCHYes. I am. A+ in Drama. Starred inevery play my Freshman andSophomore years. The mothers beganstalking me. Petris, I have aperfect GPA. I am on literallyevery sports team this schooloffers. I am going to becomepresident. I am going to curecancer. I am going to be the first man on Mars. And here I am trying

to do the smallest favor for yourinsignificant friend out ofrespect. And you, smug enough tothink you can infiltrate our groupand change what has been in placefor years. You’re the one starringin your own play, Petris.

Petris is backed into the railing overlooking the square.

FITCHBreathe.

Petris breathes.

FITCHHelp your friend while he still is.For official records, you’ve passed my initiation.

Fitch leaves. Petris doesn’t move.

TIME CUT TO:

Petris hasn’t moved. Davon, Anita, Katie, Jenny Who Smellslike Pasta, and the Flossers are there.

DAVONThree down. One to go. You movefast.Go on. Say something like you justdon’t get, do you? Or this thing isbigger than the both of us.

(MORE)

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How about a shrug? Why are you evendoing here?

ANITA Technically, he’s not a Council—

DAVONTechnically, shut up. Petris theStone, as Davon the Black and rulerof this Library Overlook, I suggestyou leave.

The Flossers and Jenny look up to Davon. The bell rings. Theyscatter.

EXT. POOL - DAY

A lifesaver drifts in the swimming pool.

The students are all on the bleachers by the pool. It’s aswim day, but no one’s swimming. Anita and the rest of thestudents and Phys-Ed Teach watch Fitch sunbathe.

Davon takes off his shirt and heads to the diving board.Students look at him confused.

Davon cannonballs into the pool. Water splashes onto Fitch.The students on the bench whisper. Fitch stares.

Davon gets out for another dive. At the top of the divingboard, he looks down into the pool. There’s a dinky woodenboat paddling in the pool. Someone in a poncho paddles.

Fatso’s at the top of the ladder, behind him.

DAVONGlad someone’s joining me.

FATSOMake it a good one.

Davon pencil dives in. He rises to see Jesska in a ponchopaddling the boat.

JESSKA

Take you to shore, Davon Simmers?

Davon boards. She paddles everywhere but the edge.

JESSKA You know, it wasn’t our idea to make swimming unpopular. That’sjust how it was.

DAVON (CONT'D)

(MORE)

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Back when there was still a monarchy, before the Council. We merely upheld it. Personally, Idon’t want to get my hair wet.

DAVONIs this PE or History?

JESSKA Spunky, I like it. To think Ididn’t even know your nameyesterday.

DAVONWe were dancing partners in thirdgrade. Square dancing. Mrs.Blanquist. You cried because youdidn’t want to dance with me.Things haven’t changed, have they?

JESSKA Don’t remember. Sorry. But hey,being a nobody is in these days.

DAVONSo why the history lesson?

JESSKA I like talking to you. You remind me of me, Davon Simmers.

DAVONIt’s real cute that you’re

purposely saying my name wrong.

JESSKA Purposefully. And Davon, I’m nottrying to be cute. I know I’m notpretty. Learned that in thirdgrade. Back when everything washopscotch and four square, and wedidn’t understand the world like wedo now. Shelley Samuels called mean ugly adopted bitch. Unoriginal,sure, but it has a special sting when you’re eight years old. Do you

remember Shelley Samuels? Mrs.Blanquist’s class.

Davon thinks.

JESSKA (CONT'D)

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JESSKA Of course not. I erased her. Thishistory lesson is to make it clearto you that you won’t suffer thesame fate.

DAVONOh no, you’re going to make mepopular?

JESSKA So sarcastic. So angry. While I gotover my insecurities before I got my period, it seems you still dragyours around.

DAVONMy period?

JESSKA

Who knows how cool you could’vebeen? But you know, what is cool?I’ll tell you. Cool is the momentbefore you need more cool.

DAVONRight, this isn’t History class.It’s Philosophy.

JESSKA No, this is an execution.

Fatso jumps into the pool. The paddle boat rocks among the

waves. Jesska takes out a bag of peanuts and twiddles one inher mouth.

JESSKA Peanut?

Davon’s mouth droops.

JESSKA I know almost everyone in thisschool, Davon Simmers. I also knowalmost every rumor, and that'sbecause I start half of them.

Fitch takes off his sunglasses and peers up at the two.

DAVONI'm getting real bored, how aboutyou take this thing in?

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JESSKA Just a minute now.

DAVONNah, I’m good.

Davon is about to jump overboard, but Jesska grabs his arm.

JESSKA Okay, okay. Let's go in, feisty.You got a large cock to back upthat attitude, Big Dick Davon?

DAVONWhat?

She paddles to the edge of the pool.

JESSKA You're always the last one to hit

the showers. That's what the boyssay. Why is that?

DAVONYou are a sad, uptight bitch who—

JESSKA And you shall yearn for the daysyou were a nobody. Here we are.

Davon takes a step out of the pool. Jesska sways her arm tothe back of Davon's trunks and pulls.

Davon's eyes go wide. His shorts go down. His front hisexposed to the students on the bleachers. They erupt inlaughter. Even Phys-Ed Teach can't help but chuckle.

Out of nowhere, Peter the photographer slides in with hiscamera, aimed right at Davon's junk.

PETERPhoto for the school paper!

CLICK!

Davon runs, butt-naked for the locker room. The laughter

grows louder and louder. Fitch helps Jesska off the boat.They share a stare of unspoken discontent.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

Petris walks through a hallway. STUDENTS are everywhere,“kekeke”ing to themselves, each with a newspaper in hand.

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Peter slams a newspaper into Petris.

PETERNew issue of the school paper.

On the front page is a picture of Davon’s junk. Instead ofnormal genitalia, there are two hazelnuts and an unshelledpeanut (balls and penis respectively). The title: “DAVONSUMMERS: PEANUT-DICK.”

The laughing grows. Petris sees Davon on the other side ofthe hallway. Davon eyes are red, but he puts on a smile.

STUDENTS(chanting)

PEANUT-DICK. PEANUT-DICK.

Davon walks up to Petris.

DAVON

You don’t need to say anything.That’s a joke. Because you usuallydon’t.

Behind Davon, Petris sees Jesska down the hall, waiting witha smile.

DAVONHey, I just wanted to— I don'tknow. I guess I should say—

PETRISGet cracking, peanut-dick.

Petris passes Davon and heads for Jesska.

OVER BLACK;

SUPER: ALL HAIL THE NEW COUNCILLOR


Anita tapes her broken glasses together. Katie looks bored.

ANITA I guess Petris is a Councillor now.

KATIEYup.

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ANITA Do you ever wonder about yourpurpose in this whole scheme?

KATIENope.

ANITA Yeah.

Katie texts on her phone.

KATIE: Anita being philosophical. Please advise.

She scrolls up on her phone. It shows several other textsthat she sent and no replies.

KATIE: Hey.

KATIE: omg so bored

INT. DARK ROOM - DAY

Petris looks at the texts from Katie and puts down his phone.

Jesska, Fitch, Mex, Cathy, and Petris hang out in the darkroom. Jesska texts. Cathy fixes her hair in her phone’scamera. Mex takes pictures of a sleeping Gaucho with hisfedora. Fitch spins his phone on his finger.

PETRISSo, what do we do?

Fitch’s phone falls from his finger. Jesska stops texting.Mex looks up. Cathy keeps fixing her hair. Silence hangs.

JESSKA Whatever we want.

PETRISMaybe we could start with thebathroom of piss.

JESSKA We’re not janitors, Petris.

PETRISHow about changing this sandals with socks policy?

They snicker and crack up, mostly directed at Mex.

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MEXMy reign of terror is up.

They simmer down.

JESSKA Those were the days.

PETRISWhat?

MEXSandals with socks was neverpopular.

PETRISWhat?

MEXWhen Jesska was forming the Council

two years ago, I told her I could make sandals with socks cool. Shedidn’t believe me.

FITCHAnd then he did it! The maliciousMexican did it!

They crack up.

JESSKA All right, Petris.

Jesska texts.

JESSKA (CONT’D)Done.

PETRISWhat?

JESSKA It’s done.

PETRISThe sandals thing?

CATHYYeah. If you see anyone with socksand sandals, tell us.

FITCHWe’ll grease them good.

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PETRISNo, that’s not—

JESSKA Jeez, you’re picky. It’s only yourfirst day.

PETRISWhat is my purpose here then?

CATHYCoro is coming!

JESSKA Coronation is coming. We needed asafe fifth member that the studentbody liked. Now that we have you,nothing stands in our way.

EXT. DARK ALLEYWAY OF CANKCORE HIGH - DAY

A bite of pizza crust falls to the ground.

Davon stumbles through a dark area of the school. He tosses asoda can to the ground. He uses a wall for support and sitsdown. A voice beckons from the black:

UNO HOO (O.S.)Davon Summers.

DAVONOh my god. Do you Freaks ever run

out of grease? Use shampoo.

UNO HOO lies further down the alleyway, hidden in the black.

UNO HOOIt seems you bust your nut tooearly, Mr. Macadamia.

DAVONGood one.

UNO HOOI hope you don’t crack over it.

DAVONI get it.

UNO HOOWhat you don’t get is that once you wear your weakness as a shell, noone can hurt you.

(MORE)

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But as it is, you have nowhere elseto go. That's another thing we havein common.

DAVONAnd you are?

UNO HOOUno Hoo, I am.

DAVONNo, I don't.

UNO HOOI’m the feeling deep inside yourhead that’s screaming out loud, butyou keep ignoring it.

DAVONWell I’m definitely trying to

ignore you.

UNO HOODon’t you want to see them fall?

DAVONCan you cut the stupid, Lord of theRings bullshit? I’m kinda over it.

UNO HOOI don't know if you can tell, butI'm frowning sarcastically.

DAVONNope!

Uno Hoo steps from the shadows. Trenchcoat, sunglasses,unkempt. Ambiguous gender (we’ll go with “he”). Asian.

DAVONUno Hoo? Jesus. They said—

UNO HOOThat I transferred, sure.

DAVON

You a Freak now or something?

He takes off his glasses to show his non-yellow eyes.

UNO HOOFreaks are only good for drugs andgrease balls.

UNO HOO (CONT'D)

(MORE)

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We have slightly higheraspirations. What are you doing forlunch period?


Peter and a team of REPORTERS shove microphones in Petris’face. Petris navigate through them with his lunch tray.

REPORTER 1Is this related to your decision toeliminate socks from sandals?

PETRISThe point is you can choose—

PETERIs it true you come from a group ofnobodies? Would you relate your

story as a rags to riches endeavor?

PETRISListen, socks with sandals is onething, but, as Councillor, I’mgoing to see that the real issuesthat plague this school arethoroughly investigated. Class warfare. Social hierarchy.Disparity between—

REPORTER 2Is it true Davon the Peanut-Dick

used to be your friend?

REPORTER 1Best friend?

PETRISWell—

REPORTER 3We have a quote of you saying, getcracking, you mother fucking peanutson of a fucker mother fucker dick fuck peanut dick.

PETRISWait a second—

REPORTER 1Coro is coming. Who will you betaking to Coronation?

UNO HOO (CONT'D)

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Petris, overwhelmed, grabs his chest.

PETRISCan you all just get out of my way?

Everyone moves out of his way, silent. Petris gives his trayto one of the reporters and leaves.

EXT. CONVENIENCE STORE - DAY

Davon follows Uno Hoo into a store.

UNO HOOKeep up, peanut.

DAVONWhy do you need me?

UNO HOO

You’re unique, strong, and veryspecial. Come on.

Uno Hoo picks a a six pack of beer from the fridge.

DAVONScrew you. I have more importantthings to do than participate inthis nonsense political drama.

UNO HOOIs it Christmas already? Becauseyou’re acting awfully roasted—

DAVONChestnuts! I know! I assure you Ihave already heard every nut pun,so don’t try to act clever with me.

UNO HOOThen stop following me. Go hang out with the other peanut-dicks,freaks, emos, turbo nerds, and thecoalition of peoples who smell likepasta. Do you wanna be Davon thePeanut Dick, or Davon the Black?

DAVONI want—

UNO HOODon’t answer. I don’t have time foryour angsty oh I’m lost andhopeless phase.

(MORE)

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Listen, I can’t be seen, so foryour first assignment, Davon theBlack, buy a coke and cherryslushy, and these.

Uno Hoo hands the six-pack to Davon and puts up his hood.

DAVONWhat? I don’t even think I cantouch these legally.

Uno Hoo points to the greasy white Clerk (20s).

UNO HOODavon, you’re black. That clerkover there is some sheltered whiteboy that never left this messed uptown or had a hardship in his life.Just go sass him up.

DAVONSass him up? What?

UNO HOOBuy them and meet me by the south wing lavs. This is a test, Davon.

DAVONFor what purpose?

UNO HOOTerrorism.

DAVONTerrorism? Like 9/11?

UNO HOOExactly like 9/11. It happened likea million years ago, but you stillhear about it every single stupidday on the news. Coke and cherry,okay. Before lunch is over.

Uno Hoo sneaks out of the store. Davon browses, idly lookingat candy. He sees a pack of peanuts with a happy cartooncartoon peanut on them. He storms over to the clerk.

DAVONThese and a coke cherry slushy.

CLERKI’m going to need to see some ID.

UNO HOO (CONT'D)

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DAVONWhachu talkin’ bout some IDboolshit? Nigga, you think I gottime fo’ dat? I’m Davon Summers theBlack. Don’t make me teach youabout respect fool.

The Clerk is confused.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

Petris enters the hallway from the cafeteria. The Courier isthere with a smile and bandaged legs.

COURIERCouncillor, sir! I am your courier.If you need anything, I’m your guy.

PETRIS

What your name?

COURIERTimmy. Tommy. Timmy. Tommy.Whatever, sir. Councillor sir.

PETRISWell, which is it?

COURIERWhichever you prefer, sir.

Petris notices the Courier’s socks and sandals.

Reporter 3 exits the cafeteria and runs down the hall.

PETRISI see you decided to keep yoursocks with sandals. I appreciate—

COURIERWhat do you mean, keep? Was there anew ruling?

The Courier checks his phone.

PETRISWell you can choose—

COURIERJesus!

The Courier rips off his sandals and in an attempt to get hissocks off, trips into a locker and bangs his head. Blood.

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PETRISNo, you can do what you want.

COURIERWhat?

PETRISWhat you want.

COURIERWhat?

PETRISWant!

COURIERWhat?


Reporter 1 receives a text message.

INT. CONVENIENCE STORE - DAY

The Clerk texts, watching Davon exit the store.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

The Courier wipes the blood from his head with his socks.

PETRISWANT.

Reporter 1 exits from the cafeteria and passes by the Courierand Petris.

INT. GIRL’S BATHROOM - DAY

RUMOR GIRL scribbles on the wall of the girls bathroom:“Petris the Stone has a rock hard.”

Reporter 1 bursts in, stops, and enters a stall. He pops out

again, and signals the Rumor girl to enter the stall. RumorGirl enters the stall beside him.

Reporter 1 passes scribbled on toilet paper to Rumor Girlunder the stall.

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INT. COMPUTER LAB - DAY

Rumor Girl enters the Computer lab and psses into the ear ofJenny (who smells like pasta). Jenny prints a sheet of paper.

EXT. BOYS RESTROOM - DAY

Davon hands a slushy to Uno Hoo in front of the boysbathroom.

DAVONCouldn’t get the beers. Carded me.

UNO HOOThe slushy will do. There are nofailures, only different incrementsof progress. Was it at least fun?

DAVON

Embarrassing. But something...

UNO HOOLiberating. To find your identity,you must kill the old one.

DAVONSo what’s this all about? You got abanner? Catch-phrase? Club name?

UNO HOONo banner. No catchphrase. No songof our people. Davon, we are the

free from whatever fascist medicinethis school has been taking. We won’t be known by our banners orour names, but of the mythologythey speak of us. Years from now, anew generation of freshman willenter this school hearing legendarytales of you and I. The prologue tothese epics starts with Davon andUno Hoo: the ones who flooded thesouth wing lavs with pee.

Davon sees the pee seeping out of the bathroom.

DAVONYou’ve been flooding the bathrooms?

UNO HOOThis is where is starts. The gender-biased infrastructure is anotherpillar of this fascist regime.

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DAVONIt’s so crazy it just might work.

Davon stamps away.

DAVONThat’s sarcasm, you nut.

Jenny, holding a message, bumps past Davon as he leaves.

EXT. FRONT STEPS - DAY

Cathy and Jesska eat lunch on the front steps. Jesska looksout to the front lawn, gazing at Fitch. He and Mex try toplay frisbee with Gaucho, but Gaucho won’t budge.

Cathy farts.

CATHY

My farts have this oaky texture tothem recently.

Tommy the Courier rushes over with a paper, knees and headbandaged. He slips onto his face. He comes back up, bloodpouring out of his nose.

COURIEROh man. Oh jeez.

He hands the bloody message to Cathy.

CATHY

Aw, thanks, Timmy. Let’s see here.Cards. Big boobs. Sunrise. VinceVaughn.

Jesska takes the paper. There’s four picture: Uno the cardgame, a picture of a busty woman, clip art of a sunrise, anda picture of Vince Vaughn.

JESSKA (V.O.)Fitch. Fitch. Fitch.

(looking at the Uno cards)Fitch is playing games with you.

(to the busty woman)

He’s cheating on you with bigchested women.

(to the sunrise)You have to wake up.

(to Vince Vaughn)Vince Vaughn.

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JESSKA For once, you’re spot on, Cathy.

CATHYSo who are you taking toCoronation? I was thinking ofasking Petris to ask me.

Jesska sees Petris trudging to the steps. She goes up to himand diverts him from the rest of the Councillors.

He’s tired. He points to the steps.

JESSKA No, we need to talk. I need you dosome spying.

PETRISWh—

JESSKA This is internal.

PETRISHo—

JESSKA I need you to spy on Fitch.

PETRISWh—

JESSKA

Do boy stuff with him. Talk aboutgirls. And sex. And football.Penises. And farts. Whatever.

Petris waits.

PETRISWh—

JESSKA You’re one of us now. But we haveour own dirty secrets.

Petris doesn’t respond.

JESSKA Fitch and I had sex. I know. Ifpeople found proof of that, itcould be trouble for the Council.

Petris is confused.

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JESSKA Don’t you know your history? Ofcourse not. You didn’t go toColesor Middle School. Fitch and I were King and Queen at—

PETRISI don’t care.

JESSKA Here’s my point. Fitch didn’tejaculate a lot. He can cum riversthat man, but this was raindrops on my face. Usually if you don’t havesex in a long time, you ejaculate more, right? That’s evidence thathe’s been having sex with othergirls, right?

PETRIS

Sound.

JESSKA I need you to spy on him.

PETRISI’m not your dog doing your dog work.

JESSKA This is for the Council, not me.

PETRIS

There are bigger bites on my plate.

JESSKA I helped with your little sandalsdilemma—

PETRISThey’re supposed to choose!

JESSKA You trying to accomplish some grandscheme, Petris?

Petris shrugs.

JESSKA Get over yourself. You gonna takedown the big bad Council? Yes, weknow your stupid, idealistic utopiaplan. We know everything about you.Wah wah, my mommy left me.

(MORE)

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I’m going to act all mysterious andstuff cause everything is unfair.I’m going to fix this school. Growup. Your taciturn enigma characteris grows old and boring. Don’tpretend you can just waltz into ourgroup and change the dynamics ofsociety that have evolved over millions of years. Petris, theCouncil is a necessary part ofhumanity. What would people do inthe morning if we didn’t tell them what to wear?

PETRISThey’d put on what they want?

JESSKA They don’t know what they want,Petris. If everything was cool,

nothing would be cool. Now suck itup and find out who Fitch is havingsex with. This is important.What? Have you gone mute again?

PETRISFuck you.

Petris leaves.

JESSKA Mex!


Petris keeps his head down his desk as Mr. Munn lectures.

MR. MUNNIn approximation, there are, onehundred billion stars in the MilkyWay galaxy. Multiply that by theestimated ten trillion galaxies andyou get a hundred octillion stars.That's one with twenty nine zeroes.

Mr. Munn etches every zero into the board. Mex is sittingnext to Petris.

MEXShe’s a harsh one, that Jess.

Jesska is at the back of the class surrounded by studentsclosely paying attention to her.

JESSKA (CONT'D)

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MEXWe all mean well though. You’ll getused to it. Rocky start.

Mr. Munn finishes writing the zeroes.

MR. MUNNEven that's just what we canobserve. What I'm trying to get at,is that you're all insignificant.

All the students are texting. One GIRL turns to another.

GIRLI don’t get it. Is it literally apeanut or is that a metaphor?

Mr. Munn holds up a copy of Catcher in the Rye.

MR. MUNN

What would Holden Caulfield sayabout this? Mex?

Mex does the Petris shrug and nudges Petris.

MR. MUNNHow do you feel about being aninsignificant piece of shit?

MEXYour mom’s insignificant.

Some giggles, but everyone’s too busy looking at pictures on

their phone. Mr. Munn stares down Petris:

MR. MUNNAnyone? Anything. Make some noises.Give me something to work with. Iam here to work. To do a job. Foryou. I care about you and want youto help me. I need this.

The moment lingers, Petris’ mouth agape.

MR. MUNNPetris, any ideas?

PETRISI bet Holden Cauliflower was apeanut-dick, am I right?

Some giggles. Mr. Munn snickers to himself. It get louderuntil he lets out a yell. He runs out of the classroom.Petris follows.

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EXT. ENGLISH CLASS - DAY

Petris looks around. Nothing.

PETRISDad?

A dodgeball tumbles around like a tumbleweed.


Petris takes his seat while Mex writes into his notepad.

MEXOh man, Teach is cray-cray. Hey doyou know any good nut puns? I’mtrying to compile them. Not much ofa talker? That’s all cool, ese. Igot the medicine here.

Mex hands Gaucho to Petris.

MEXDo you feel that?

PETRISWhat?

MEXDo you feel that warm tinglinginside of you?

PETRISI don’t think I’ve ever felt that.

MEXStroke him.

PETRISWhat?

MEXStroke him.

Petris strokes. Gaucho looks back.

MEXFeels nice, doesn’t it?

Petris shrugs.

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MEXAl vivo todo le falta, y al muertotodo le sobra.

PETRISWhat?

MEXI don’t know. I don’t speakSpanish.

PETRISYou’re Mex the Mexican.

MEXDad’s Italian and Mom’s black. ButI worked my way up the Mexican Gangbecause I had outside perspective.I could be Mexican, without beingMexican.

PETRISWhy—

MEXFour brothers. Three sisters. In afamily that big, you know what matters?

PETRISBeing noticed.

MEX

You got a big family too?

PETRISJust me. Don’t you miss your oldMexican friends? Before becoming aCouncillor?

MEXMiss? What do you mean?

PETRISI don’t know. Like, that feeling when you have to poop, but it’s in

your chest not your stomach.

MEXNah. Only thing I miss Gaucho.Here’s the kicker though. Did Iadopt Gaucho to fulfill my Mexicanpersona or was it my inner, trueMexican persona getting Gaucho?

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Petris shrugs.

MEXIt’s a dog eat dog world Petris,and we’re the Chinese butchers fromSan Francisco. Do what Jesska asks.She’s rough, but she keeps thingstogether.

PETRISI feel very warm.

MEXWe’re bonding.

Petris lifts up Gaucho.

PETRISNope. It’s pee. Is that normal?

MEXHe’s just bonding with you.


Katie and Anita lie on the floor.

ANITA Did you hear about Petris?

(beat)Do you think I’m boring?

Katie farts. Katie grabs her head. Aching. Moaning. Yelling.

ANITA Did I tell you about that A I wrote?

INT. SCIENCE CLASS - DAY

Silent scene as Anita narrates:

MS. KLASKY (30s) sits at her desk, drunk.

ANITA (V.O.)Ms. Klasky was drunk again andneeded someone to write the noteson the board.

Anita raises her hand. Ms. Klasky points to her. Anita goesto the board and writes out notes.

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ANITA (V.O.)Of course I volunteered. I takepride in my legibility, and Ms.Klasky seems like the type who would sign a letter of rec I wrote.

She writes an “a” on the board.

ANITA (V.O.)I began outlining the lesson, and what better letter to start withthan an A. Beautiful letter,especially in its lowercase form.The fancy ones with the littlesquiggly on top.

The “a” vanishes and becomes an “a.”

ANITA (V.O.)

I continued on as usual.

The students begin to awaken. Something catches their eye onthe board. Even Ms. Klasky seems interested. Anita continuesto write on the board. She turns around to the class.

ANITA (V.O.)But something was off. Silence.

Anita is confused by the class’ reaction.

ANITA (V.O.)A class had never looked sointerested.

One student points to the board.

ANITA (V.O.)Then I looked back to what I wrote.

The “a” on the board is perfect.

INT. MAIN SQUARE - OVERLOOK -DAY

Anita is super serious.

ANITA Katie. It was a perfect A.

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Students measure the “a” with protractors. The board has beenerased except the “a.” Anita draws a circle around it.

ANITA (V.O.)It soon became a monument.

Students peek in from outside the classroom.

ANITA (V.O.)Even Fitch came to see it. Hecalled it magnificent.

Fitch says “magnificent.”

Anita sits down with students around her. They’re allinterested in her.

ANITA (V.O.)

They knew my name. Fitch knew myname. I went from nerd to cool nerdin a single period. The say theTurbo Nerds were interested inrecruiting me.

The eccentric Turbo Nerds smile from the doorway.


Anita rambles on.

ANITA But things don’t last, do they?


An old man SUBSTITUTE erases the board.

ANITA (V.O.)We had a substitute.

EXT. SCIENCE CLASS - DAY

We hear a student scream.


A student points at the board. The others begin to scream,gasp, and put their heads down.

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ANITA (V.O.)A class had never looked soshocked.

A faint remnant of the “a” remains next to the eraser- wielding Substitute.

ANITA (V.O.)He didn’t even know what he wasdoing when he erased the entireboard. I didn’t really know what was going on, but I felt my senseof childhood bliss escaping me.They asked me to redo it.

Anita goes to the board and writes an imperfect “a.”

ANITA (V.O.)I tried.

Another “a.” And another. And another.

ANITA (V.O.)I couldn’t.

INT. ANITA’S ROOM - DAY

Anita studies from a book.

ANITA (V.O.)I went home. Had to study.

The “a”s in the book pop out.

ANITA (V.O.)All I could see were As.

Anita closes her book, and writes her “Anita Arora” on asheet of paper.

ANITA (V.O.)Katie, my name has four As. Eachone turning my fingers into nails.Once you’ve touched the sun... wellyou know how it goes.

She crosses out her name.


ANITA It’s Icarus.

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KATIEI know!

INT. ANITA’S KITCHEN - NIGHT

Anita plays with full plate of curry rice. No appetite.

ANITA (V.O.)Guess I should be thankful I don’teat alphabet soup anymore.

INT. ANITA’S ROOM - NIGHT

Anita lies wide awake on her bed by the window.

ANITA (V.O.)Couldn’t sleep. In the stars, Icould see—

KATIE (V.O.)Anita!


Katie holds her head, stressed and annoyed.

KATIEWhat does this have to do withanything?

ANITA I just wanted...to talk.

KATIEI don’t care.

Anita looks down at her palm. She’s etched imperfect “a”sinto her hand. Some blood.

ANITA Yeah. I guess it’s nothing.

Davon approaches from one side.

ANITA Davon?

Petris approaches from the other, staring down Davon.

KATIEPetris?

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DAVONI really like how your seed ofreformation has grown into abeautiful orchid. The atmosphere ofthis school has really changed.

ANITA Guys, there’s no reason to fight.

DAVONShe’s right. Last period I wascalled a coconut kid. Catchy,right?

ANITA Technically, coconuts are drupesand not true nuts. So maybe—

DAVONYou’re a fucking drupe.

PETRISYou always wanted people to knowyou. Now they do.

DAVONUndo it. If you could make sandals without socks cool, then makepeanut-dicks cool.

PETRISIf peanut-dicks were cool, theneverything would be cool. And if

everything is cool, then nothing iscool. Take off those socks, it’sridiculous.

DAVONYou said there was something wrong with this school.

PETRISThere is.

DAVONNah, there’s something wrong with

you. You’ve changed, man.

PETRISOf course I have!

DAVONYou’re full of yourself.

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PETRISWhat else would I full of?

DAVONOh man. Uno Hoo was right.

PETRIS/ANITA/KATIEUno Hoo?!

DAVONThat’s right. Things are going tochange around here. Fisticuffs, youposer.

Davon raises his fists. Katie leaves, brushing by Petris.

DAVONAnita, whose side are you on?

ANITA

How can I choose to do anythinganymore?

DAVONWorthless as usual, Anita.

Petris whistles. TWO FREAKS jump from the roof.

PETRISCall me nuts, but I gotta getcracking. Cashew later.

Petris runs away. The two Freaks reach into their hair and

form greaseballs.

Petris hears Davon’s screams as he runs. He grabs his chestin pain.


Mr. Cho serves Jesska a pizza. Cathy sleeps in the booth infront of her.

JESSKA (Chinese)

Thank you, father.

Jesska looks at her phone.

PETRIS: i’ll do it, for the Front Steps and Pajama Fridays.

JESSKA: Deal.

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PETRIS: But first, tell me about Uno Hoo.

JESSKA Uno Hoo?

EXT. BOYS RESTROOM - NIGHT

A greased-up Davon approaches a smiling Uno Hoo.

DAVONHand me a goddamn slushy.


Jesska takes out the spy message with the Vince Vaughn pic.

JESSKA Uno. Hooters. Sun. Day. Vince.

Vaughn. Uno Hoo. Day Vaughn. Davon.No.

Jesska kicks Cathy awake.

JESSKA (Chinese)

Wake up!

CATHYOh god. I had a dream my hair wasgreasy and they knew.

JESSKA Who? I mean, I need you to dosomething.

CATHYWhat?

JESSKA Reconnaissance.

INT. KATIE AND CATHY’S ROOM - NIGHT

Katie plays a gameboy on the bed. Cathy lurks by the door.

CATHYPss.

KATIEJesus, what?

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CATHYDo you remember that game we usedto play when we were young?

KATIENo.

CATHYYes.

KATIEPlease keep me out of yourridiculous plans.

Cathy is now on the bed with Katie. Almost intimate.

CATHYIt’s not a favor. A trade. You getto play Councillor and hang out with your BFF Petris.

Cathy leans in to kiss Katie, but kisses a teddy bearinstead.

KATIEAnd what do you get?

CATHYRenaissance.

Cathy holds our her cell phone. Katie pulls out hers.Identical.

They switch phones. Cathy presses a button on her phone. Alightning app makes a crackling sound.

Cathy fixes Katie’s hair while Katie fixes Cathy’s. Katietakes Cathy’s glasses. They both stare at themselves in the mirror, gasping at their forms. Cathy tastes her hand.

KATIE(to the mirror)

You’re a bitch. Screw you bitch.Whore slut. Whore slutting cuntslut. Bitch.

CATHY(to herself)

I am smart. I am so smart. I ampost-smart. I listen to music andstuff.

KATIEI’m vegan. Bitch. Bitch.

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CATHY(to Katie)

We’re ready for the mom test.

INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Cathy and Katie lurk behind their mother, MRS. BATES, who ispassed out on the couch watching TV in the dark.

CATHYMother.

MRS. BATESMmffu...

CATHYMother, it’s me. Ca—Katie.

MRS. BATES

Cat.. get me an ibuprofen.

KATIENo, I’m Cathy.

MRS. BATESGet me—goddamn Jews.

Cathy and Katie snicker.

CATHY/KATIEShe has no idea.

Katie and Cathy leave. Mrs. Bates kicks an empty wine bottleoff the coffee table.

EXT. WILLIAM BLACK JOHNSON HIGH SCHOOL / FRONT LAWN - NIGHT

Davon wears a tactical sneaking gear including a face mask.He’s holding a spray can.

DAVONWhy did we have to go all the wayhere? I thought we were trying tochange our school.

UNO HOOStop asking questions!

Uno Hoo, also suited up, spray paints over the school’s mural which says “WILLIAM B.J. HIGH SCHOOL.”

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DAVONWell I’m the one who had to drivetwenty minutes to get here throughthe bad part—

Uno Hoo sprays: “D” “I” “E” “N” ...

Uno Hoo continues as Davon watches. Davon takes off his mask.Something disturbs Davon. Unsettling. Disgusting.

DAVONWait wait wait. This is...

Uno Hoo smiles, also suited up, holding a spray can.

UNO HOOA catalyst.

DAVONWhat the fuck? No, seriously, what

the fuck?

UNO HOOAre you going to pussy out on everyassignment?

DAVONPeeing in the bathroom isunsanitary and had a weird logic toit, but this is... something’s wrong.

UNO HOO

Can you put your personal feelingsbehind this?

DAVONMy feelings? This extends a smidgepast my feelings.

UNO HOOIt’s not racist. It’s a wall.

DAVONAnd you wrote it.

UNO HOOAnd Mark Twain wrote Huck Finn.This wall is here to elicitresults. My personality andintentions are not directed intothe art I create. This wall has apurpose in our plan, not in who Iam.

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Davon goes to spray over the wall, but Uno Hoo stops him.

DAVONThis isn’t funny anymore.

UNO HOOYou’ve been born to think a certain way your entire life. I’mreprogramming you. Throughdestruction we rebuild. Now comeon, you don’t want to be caughtblack handed.

Uno Hoo laughs and snatches his spray can.

UNO HOONot because you’re black. Becauseof the spray can. Oh god. Please,It’s black paint. Black handed.It’s funny. Come on.

Uno Hoo runs away. Davon takes a second to look at what UnoHoo wrote. Confused. Sick.

INT. FRONT STEPS - DAY

Petris sits on the front steps. He’s in pajamas and wearssandals without socks.

Freak One and another Freak, ZAC, guard his sides. Petertakes photographs of Petris from every angle.

PETRISPeter. I shall be conducting aparty. My place. Make sure there’san article in the paper. You, name?

ZACI am Zac, leader of the Freaks.

PETRISAre you the same Freak who producesthe drug, Zac, Zac?

ZAC

Yes. I shall begin production forthe party.

Zac leaves.

Petris notices FRESHMAN KELLY, a young black girl sitting onthe steps eating lunch.

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PETRISWho are you?

FRESHMAN KELLYKelly? Hi.

PETRISWhat are you doing here?

FRESHMAN KELLYEating lunch. Want a chip?

PETRISWhat are you doing here on thefront steps?

FRESHMAN KELLYIs that okay?

PETRIS

Are you with Davon?

FRESHMAN KELLYWho?

PETRISI told Jesska to make it clear they were only open to me.

FRESHMAN KELLYI don’t know a Jessica. I’m sorry,I just transferred from William B.Johnson High School. I didn’t know

where to eat. What’s your name?

PETRISTransfer?

FRESHMAN KELLYMy parents didn’t want me goingthere after what happened.

PETRISWhat happened?

FRESHMAN KELLY

You didn’t hear?

PETRISJesus Christ, do you not know howto answer a question?

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Petris types on his phone. The Courier rushes over with aglove. The Courier has a broken arm, and blood dried on hisnose and knees. Petris puts on the glove.

PETRISThank you, Timmy. Freak, grease me.

FREAK TWOSir?

FRESHMAN KELLYI’m sorry. You know I’ll just—

PETRISShut up. Grease me.

FREAK TWOLet me, sir.

Petris holds out his glove. Freak Two pulls a grease ball out

of his hair and puts it in the glove. Petris approach theFreshman Kelly.

FRESHMAN KELLYHold up. Who the f—

Petris butts her face with the palm of the glove. She fallsback onto the steps and coughs up grease. Petris smears thegrease over her face and hair.

FRESHMAN KELLYHel—

She vomits. Petris smears the vomit and grease over her face.It drips like semen off her face.

Petris watches her cry, waiting for something.

INT. RUN DOWN PORTABLE CLASSROOM - DAY

Four black students: DARNELL, ANTHONY, ZINZI, and LUKE sit indesks. Davon is in front of the class.

DAVONHe’ll be here in just—

Uno Hoo bursts in.

UNO HOOWhat’s up my niggas? This all thetransfers?

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DAVONDon’t do that.

UNO HOOSorry to here bout that shit that went down at your school, but welcome to Cankcore High.

LUKEI’m sorry, I’m not sure if I’m inthe right place. What club is thisexactly?

ZINZIWhat is this?

DAVONThis is, well I don’t—

UNO HOO

This ain’t no club. We just wantedyou homies to feel safe andrespected here. This is Davon, ourresident black, and your new friendslash leader.

DARNELLLeader?

DAVONNo, not like—

UNO HOO

Yes, leader. You see, I don’t knowif your school has a monarchy,dictator, or serfdom, but here atCankcore, a hellish, disgusting,fascist Council, full of sick,deranged people, rules. We’re goingto take them down, with your help.

LUKEWhat are you talking about?

UNO HOOYou mean, what the biznatch speak I

be spreading?

LUKEWhat?

UNO HOOWhat’s your name, boy?

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LUKELuke.

UNO HOOThat’s a white boy’s name.

LUKEMy mother’s white.

UNO HOOWell what about you?

ANTHONYIt’s Anthony.

UNO HOOWell are you a blood or a crip?

ANTHONYWhat?

UNO HOODavon!

Uno Hoo pulls Davon aside.

UNO HOODavon, these kids are well spoken,smart, and don't back-sass me likeyou do. They're worthless.

DAVONAre you sure you’ve met a black

person before?

UNO HOOYou need to train them. Coronationis coming. They need to be ahundred percent more black.

DAVONEven if I knew what that meant, how would I do that? Why Coronation?

UNO HOOCouncil of the Year is decided on

Coronation. That’s when we take itback. Teach these ho-hos to speaklike a nigga, and then teach themhow to dance.

DAVONDance? I don’t know how to dance.

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Uno Hoo points to Davon’s heart.

UNO HOOOf course you do, Davon. It’s inhere. Petris is having a partysoon. We need to be ready.

(to the squad)Can any of you get a gun?

(off their stares)We’ll work on it.

UNO HOOI got work to do. You two!

Cathy (posing as Katie) and Anita are in the corner of theroom. Cathy plays a Nintendo handheld thingie.

UNO HOOCome with me.

EXT. FIELD - DAY

The old portable opens to the school field, far away fromanything else.

Uno Hoo leads Cathy and Anita out.

UNO HOOI need you two. You are bothspecial to my plan.

ANITA

I don’t care. We just had nowhereelse to go.

CATHYLet’s hear him out.

ANITA Oh, okay.

UNO HOODavon is training our army, but westill need to weaken theCouncillors. Anita, I’ve set up a

public chess match between you andFitch.

ANITA What? I can’t beat him.

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UNO HOOI know his weakness. Fitch isn’t soperfect because he’s a god. He’sperfect because he has mommy anddaddy issues. It’s simple math. Hetries so hard to impress them.Inevitably, at some point in thechess match, Fitch will get theupper hand. That’s when you startdropping comments about hisparents, and he’ll crumble. Afteryou beat Fitch, he’ll losecredibility. Who knows, I mightsave you a spot on the New WorldCouncil.

CATHYAnd what about me?

UNO HOO

We’ll work on that, but we do knowCathy’s weakness.

CATHYWhat?

UNO HOOYou.

CATHYWhat?

UNO HOO

She’s clearly jealous of you. Youhave that authentic hipster thingthat she can only pretend toimitate. Like, what is that, agameboy? So authentic.

CATHYDid she tell you this?

UNO HOOIt’s obvious.

CATHY

And how do you plan to use this?

UNO HOOI was thinking of you and Cathyswitching places. You make it seemlike it was your idea.

(MORE)

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Tell her you’re just so in love with Fitch that you want to becloser to him, and Cathy gets thebenefit of spying on us. Then I’ll misdirect her. Easy peasy, she’s adope.

CATHYWe don’t even look alike!

Uno Hoo stops in the field. He sits down and takes out a vialof white stuff.

CATHYWhat are you doing?

UNO HOOAnita, the chess match is in twodays. I suggest you practice.Cathy, we’ll work on you.

ANITA Are those drugs?

UNO HOOJust need to get out for a bit.

Uno Hoo shoots the Zac. His pupils narrow and he falls backonto the grass.

INT. PETRIS’ ROOM - DAY

Petris looks at his black, decaying chest. It’s worse thanbefore. He touches a rib. It cracks and falls to the ground.He looks at it like spilled cheetos.

KATIE (O.S.)Hello?

INT. MUNN HOUSE - DAY

Petris shoves soda bottles, take-out, and pizza boxes fromthe couch to under the coffee table. There’s a half-eatenleftover slice of pizza on the table. Petris quickly eats it.

PETRISCome in.

Katie (disguised as Cathy) enters and sits on the couch.

UNO HOO (CONT'D)

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KATIECool place. I like how the trashrepresents your inner emotions orlike whatever.

Petris nods.

KATIEFor the party, we should just notclean up. I have— my sister has atacky disco ball thingie. That’llcompliment the trashy atmosphere.

Petris nods.

KATIEAre you going to offer me somethingas your guest?

Petris goes to his refrigerator.

PETRISCoke?

KATIECoke and can I get some of yourdad’s whisky? Separate glasses?

Petris fixes her a drink.

PETRISYour sister gets the same. Used to.

KATIEYeah, she told me about it. Or like whatever. I don’t really remember.

She takes the glass and stares out the backyard.

PETRISI thought you didn’t talk.

KATIEI thought you didn’t talk.

PETRIS

To your sister.

KATIEOh. Sometimes.

PETRISAbout what? I thought she hatedyou.

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KATIEI don’t know.

She takes a sip of whisky, gags, then sips the coke.

KATIEStuff. Boys.

PETRISOh.

KATIEYeah. She likes that Davon boy,right?

PETRISOh.

KATIEDid you know that?

PETRISNo.

She sips again.

KATIEHe has a peanut-dick though.

PETRISYeah.

KATIE

I always thought you and Katiecould be a cute couple. You’re outof her league now, I guess, right?

PETRISI don’t know.

Petris looks at his hand. He walks up behind Cathy. He pointsout his finger, about to poke her. Cathy sips, winces.

He pokes her several times. She turns around.

KATIE

What are you doing?

PETRISDo you like being poked?

KATIEI don’t know. What?

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He kisses her. She waves the two glasses in the air. He pullsaway. She holds the two glasses between them. Petris takesthe whisky.

PETRISWere you offering... the glass?

KATIENo. You can have it though.

They pause. She kisses him. She pulls away.

KATIEWe should— do you have cheesy bits?

She goes to the cupboards in the kitchen and browses.

KATIEWe might need cheesy bits.

PETRISI don’t have cheesy bits.

KATIEYeah, that’d be good for a party.Maybe I’ll get some.

PETRISRight now?

KATIENo. Well, I don’t know. Maybe Ishould?

Petris shrugs.

KATIEMaybe I should get them now, so Idon’t have to worry on Friday.Should I do that?

Petris shrugs.

KATIEI’ll go now. We can do moreplanning later. Or we don’t have

to. These things sort themselves.

PETRISRight.

She goes to the door.

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DAVONI bet you’re wondering why I’mhere.

Petris grabs his chest.

DAVONNo no no. Don’t even respond. Let’sjust watch together. Should be fun.

Petris coughs.

CHESS MATCH

The match has progressed. No pieces lost on either side.

PETERThe game has started light on bothends. But I think we’re going tosee our first combat soon.

OVERLOOK

Petris looks down at the chess match. His vision blurs.

DAVONAre you going to say anything? Yousmug, pretentious—

Petris collapses. Davon goes over to him.

DAVONHey. Hey, dude. Dude.

CHESS MATCH

FITCHI’d like to initiate combat. Pawnto E5.

Two Freaks set up a table and checkers board adjacent to thechess board.

PETERHere it goes everyone. Our firstcombat of the match. Pawn on pawn.

On my mark. Go!

Fitch and Anita play speed checkers. Fitch moves his pieceseffortlessly, while Anita struggles to keep up. Fitchunleashes a combo, destroying Anita’s pieces.

PETERAnd Anita’s pawn goes down!

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Cheers from the crowd.

OVERLOOK

Darnell, Zinzi, Anthony, and Luke rush over to Davon andPetris. They are dressed more “black.”

Luke trips on his sagging pants.

ZINZIWho dis white boy?

ANTHONYWhachu doin wit sum white ass... white ass nig— do I have to say it?

DAVONJust help me, come on.

They pick him up and take him away.

CHESS MATCH

ANITA I choose to castle my king.

Fitch laughs.

FITCHYou sure about that?

PETERFolks, we’re seeing an early castle

by Anita. Of course, propertybuilding is typically a late-gamestrategy. Is Anita cracking underthe pressure?

The Freaks pull up another table and put a Monopoly board onit. Anita rolls a 3 and a 1.

PETEROoh. Bad strategy by Anita.

Anita moves her piece to the Income Tax space.

PETERLanding on the Income Tax space will cost her. Or is this part ofher strategy? The ancient ‘pretendyour losing then comeback’ strat.

IN THE CROWD

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Uno Hoo, disguised in glasses and a hat, tightens his fist.

UNO HOODamnit Anita.

Jessica, equally disguised, bumps into Uno Hoo.

JESSKA Oh I’m sorry. Your huge boy’s penis was in the way.

UNO HOOIt’s a genderless penis, you bitch.

JESSKA My mistake.

UNO HOOI thought you said you’d never talkto me again.

JESSKA How could I resist? After all, youput a lot of work into this.

CHESS MATCH

There’s now four tables. One for chess, checkers, Monopoly,Settlers of Catan. Fatso acts as player three for Settlers ofCatan. The Courier sets up a fifth table and lays down pokercards.

Anita’s chess pieces are piling up. Fitch has more property.

More settlements. Anita is losing. Fitch and Anita move tothe poker table, each with a hand of cards.

Fitch smokes an electric cigarette.

FITCHYou’d probably be playing better ifyou spent my turns planning insteadof staring at my pectoralis majors.

ANITA (stammering)

I wasn’t. They’re shiny.

Anita sees her reflection in Fitch’s chest.

IN THE CROWD

UNO HOOCome on, stupid bitch.

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And frankly, you’re a little weird.You have issues with urine.

Jesska takes off her glasses. Then she takes off Uno’s.

JESSKA And you can’t handle whenexpectations don’t meet reality.

Jesska kisses Uno.

JESSKA I hope you didn’t have any feelingsfor that Anita girl.

Fitch burps.

CHESS MATCH

Fitch’s burp continues over Anita’s monologue.

FITCHExcuse me. You’re not very good attelling stories. I see the set-up,and the eventual payoff, but I’mjust not interested.

ANITA Well maybe if—

FITCHI also understand what you’re doing with the whole parents thing,

Anita. Though I didn’t think you’dbe so naive to think such an entrylevel psychology such as mommyissues would be a way to throw off my game.

Anita nervously gulps her drink.

FITCHAnita, I have everything. And thatincludes great parents.

Fitch shows her his phone. He swipes through his phone,

showing off pictures of his Zeus and Hara-like PARENTS doingfun things like fishing, playing Monopoly, eating stuff.

We zone in on one of the photos, edging closer and closer.

FITCH (O.S.)Uno Hoo thinks he knows everything.I thought you knew better Anita.

JESSKA (CONT'D)

(MORE)

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It’s sophomoric that you think youhad any leeway against someone like me. Someone as a member of theCouncil of this school, the schoolof Cankcore High School SchoolHigh. Your pitiful attempts tobreak me my psychotronic mesotheliaionized and cauterized by the sheerstrength of intention, purpose, willpower, heart’s desire.Catastrophic esophageal reflux.Autonomic. Temporal. Visual. It’slimbic. In our limbs. In out.Breathe. Diastole.

Closer and closer to the pixelated phone screen. We hit thescreen. It cracks.

INT. FITCH’S PHOTO HOME - DAY

We enter the photo. Close in on Fitch’s pecs. Closer andcloser. So shiny. Anita’s reflection is

Castaway Sociosphere 1.13

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Transcript of Castaway Sociosphere 1.13