Cappuccino Coaching Module 4 What’s Stopping You From Making Change?
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Transcript of Cappuccino Coaching Module 4 What’s Stopping You From Making Change?
Cappuccino Coaching
Module 4What’s Stopping You From Making Change?
Welcome & Introduction(Give a few lines of introduction about yourself)
• “In my coaching I help …” (e.g - people with relationship issues or struggling with overwhelm)
• “Through questioning & coaching skills I help people …” (e.g– determine what their life purpose is, to set boundaries, set action plans & take action in their lives)
• “I’m a bit like a plumber – I help people unblock their problems!”
©Ruby McGuire 2014
What are Cappuccino Coaching Sessions?
©Ruby McGuire 2014
• A way of learning what coaching is
• A starting point for taking action and making some small changes in your life
• Safe environment – get involved as little or as much as you choose
• In business? A way of meeting like minded people, bring your business cards & share
• Not in business? Just mingle, make new friends
What We Will Cover Today• The Psychology of Change – how it works
• Things that might be stopping you
• Five common fears & how to deal with them
• Limiting beliefs – what might be holding you back and how to change that
• Learn 3 things to achieve your goals
• Set an action plan©Ruby McGuire 2014
The Psychology of ChangeDr Anthony Grant - University of Sydney
• Taking the time to contemplate a change
• Being ready to embark on a change
• Change requiring preparation
• Relapse being normal
©Ruby McGuire 2014
What’s Stopping You From Making Change?
• Belief don't deserve what you
want• Take yourself too seriously• People pleasing/others first• The Joneses• Nothing worthwhile to contribute• Agonising over decisions• Process takes too long/too much
effort or commitment
Write down 3 things that might be stopping you - WkBk
• Fear of being judged/criticised• Giving up too quickly• 'I'll do this until ...'• 'Should', 'Must',• Fear of unknown• Doubt, 'Can't'• Might make a mistake
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Five Common Types Of FearWhat are you afraid of? WkBk
(Whole session on fear coming soon so just touching on the basics)
• Fear of failure• Fear of embarrassment• Fear of rejection• Fear of success • Fear of the unknown
Once you’ve labelled it you canchallenge it.. ‘What if…
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Label it!
It help
s
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Procrastination – Some Top Tips Don’t let procrastination hold you off track
(Whole session on procrastination coming soon but until then here are 3 top tips for procrastination)
• Procrastination is often hiding fear – find out what it is & figure out why you don’t want to do it
• Stop being a perfectionist - What if 80% is good enough?
• Write a list – do the jobs on the list and set yourself a fabulous reward
• Share what you’re going to do with others – it’s amazing what accountability can do
• Break the task down into mini milestones
• Just start! – do the task for 10-15 minutes
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Procrastination – 3 Top Tips(Optional Slide – Also Used in Goal Setting)
Don’t let procrastination hold you off track (We have a whole session on procrastination coming soon but until
then here are 3 top tips for procrastination)
1. Start!(Starting is sometimes the hardest bit – do 5 minutes on something just to get you going)
2. NoticeNotice what you’re doing instead of the thing you’re meant to be doing – ask yourself why you’re putting it off
3. Next StepWrite down the very first step, get that done andthen write down the very next step(bullet points on worksheet)
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Limiting BeliefsWhat are your limiting beliefs? WkBk
• Limiting beliefs are one of the biggest areas that hold people back in life
How can you overcome them?
• Recognise them, once you know they exist you can change them, and incredibly quickly too
• We build evidence to reinforce our beliefs - Santa - grotto/parents/letter/presents
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Limiting Beliefs• Limiting beliefs are based in fear, we use
them to protect ourselves but they don't serve us
• Reframe it... What's the opposite of your belief -turnaround - 'I am good enough’
(At end of notes you have 3 top tips to help you overcome your limiting beliefs)
We are going to challenge a couple of these now..
• “I don’t deserve it”• “I can’t do it”
©Ruby McGuire 2014
‘I Don’t Deserve It’• Is that true?
• Who says?
• What needs to happen for you to deserve it?
• Write a list of your strengths, you are unique, celebrate that
• Look after you too, otherwise you will build resentment
©Ruby McGuire 2014
‘I Can’t Do It’
• Turn this impossibility into possibility - HOW can you do it?
• Has someone else done it before?
• What did they have to do to make it happen?
• How do you know if you haven't tried?
• What if you could????
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Making Mistakes
• Choose a 'have a go' attitude
• You may make a mistake but you will learn how not to do something
• Give yourself permission to make mistakes
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Taking Yourself Too Seriously?
• Lighten up!
• Take responsibility for your own life
• How can you bring more fun into your life?
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Pros & Cons
• How can you turn the cons into positives?
• What's the payoff for holding onto this belief?
(if a limiting belief is coming up then explore it a bit further – flip it etc.)
• Does your goal really fire you up?
• What's your level of commitment on a scale of 1-10 (10 high)©Ruby McGuire 2014
Choose 1 thing you’d like to changeList 3 pros & cons for that change – WkBk
(nb – all q’s here are in workbook)
3 Things To Achieve Goals
• Possibility - turn impossibility to possibility
• Ability - Believe you have the ability to achieve your goals (Has someone ever done it? Then why can't you?)
• Worthiness - You are worthy (Under what circumstances would you deserve it?)
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Action Plan
• When will you take that step?• What support do you need?
What will stop you from making thatchange?
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Write down 1 action step you will commit to WkBk
Your comfort zone
Where the magic happens
What We’ve Covered Today
• The Psychology of Change – how it works
• Things that might be stopping you
• Five common fears & how to deal with them
• Limiting beliefs – what might be holding you back and how to change that
• Learnt 3 things to achieve your goals – possibility/ability/awareness
• Set an action plan
©Ruby McGuire 2014
Enjoyed Today’s Session?
• What was the best thing about this session?
• Come back next month for our topic on ….
• Tell your friends, follow on facebook, twitter etc. (give business card if you have one)
• Want to work with me 1-2-1 (here’s how…)
• If you’ve left your name will add it to my mailing list – latest topics, hints/tips etc.
• I will leave you with some words of wisdom
©Ruby McGuire 2014