Esta obra est bajo una Licencia Creative Commons Atribucin-NoComercial-SinDerivar 4.0 Internacional. Autores: Eva Samaniego Fernndez, Mara Beatriz Prez Cabello de Alba e Ismael Ivn Teomiro Garca

BUSINESS SKILLS:

DEALING WITH

DIFFICULT PEOPLE

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Esta obra est bajo una Licencia Creative Commons Atribucin-NoComercial-SinDerivar 4.0 Internacional. Autores: Eva Samaniego Fernndez, Mara Beatriz Prez Cabello de Alba e Ismael Ivn Teomiro Garca

DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE [Source: Haigh, R. (2012. 3rd ed.), Legal English. Routledge]

TEN-POINT GUIDE WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

1 Empathise. Indicate that you understand your clients concerns or conversation will not progress.

2. Avoid defensiveness. Dont say things like Its not our fault; even if its true, the client will think that you are trying to avoid responsibility. Find a way of apologizing without necessarily admitting fault:

Im really sorry that you feel we let you down

Pacify your client, but keep things reasonably vague rather than make specific promises:

and of course well do whatever we can to sort matters out for you.

3. Seek more information, but avoid tactless questions that might send them over the edge.

It would be helpful if you could provide further information about what happened when

4. Anger management. Watch out for people who are apparently rational but evidently seething with anger: they are keeping tight control, but might explode at any time. Signs: artificially calm voice, tense facial expression, fidgety body language, over-rigid body language. Two approaches: (1) encourage them to talk about their feelings (I am sorry you feel that way, perhaps you would like to tell me briefly what happened?); (2) put it off until they calm down (maybe it would make more sense to talk about this in the afternoon). Manage your own anger before replying.

5. Dont be judgmental. Even if the clients problems have been caused by his own actions, remember that they are looking for someone to take it out on, so dont say things like If youd done it in the first place, this wouldnt have happened. A good technique is to ask questions that take things for granted: Why did you decide to book the flight at that price?

6. Avoid unrealistic promises. Never agree to do something that you cannot realistically achieve, so say things like: Id love to be able to tell you that we could do this but we cant, and the reasons are

7. Use human language. Rather than take refuge in over-formal language, be polite but use clear and straightforward language at all times.

8. Set a realistic timetable for action. Rather than specify dates, set out the steps that need to be taken and at what stage each step will occur.

9. Deal with perceived irrelevance. Many times clients cannot see the link between the questions you are asking and the problem s/he consulted you about in the first place. They become confused and start to feel that you have nor understood the problem, and tension grows. Explain things out by saying things like:

Im going to have to ask you two questions. This might not seem strictly relevant to your case, but in fact it is very important. In order to establish we need to know

10. Avoid echoing the client but dont add to what s/he is saying either. Dont repeat the clients words once and again, it sounds mechanical, but dont add (or subtract) to what s/he is saying either.

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Esta obra est bajo una Licencia Creative Commons Atribucin-NoComercial-SinDerivar 4.0 Internacional. Autores: Eva Samaniego Fernndez, Mara Beatriz Prez Cabello de Alba e Ismael Ivn Teomiro Garca

LANGUAGE TO BE USED WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

1. Use could, would or might, they sound more tentative and less assertive:

This could be a problem instead of This is a problem.

2. Present your view as a question rather than as a statement:

How about changing the dates? instead of Welll change the dates.

3. Use an introductory phrase to prepare the listener for your message:

Heres one possibility: suppose we... or Wed like to make an offer to settle the case. This is what we were thinking

4. Adding Im afraid to tone down a negative message, to make clear that you recognise the unhelpfulness of your response, and to get across the message that you would do more if you could, but you cant.

Thats all we can offer, Im afraid.

5. Use words that qualify or restrict what you say, to make your position more flexible

There is a slight problem with the proposal

instead of

We cant accept Clause 6.

6. Use not with a positive word instead of the obvious negative one, it tones down a refusal.

This is not very convenient instead of I disagree

7. Use a comparative (better, more convenient) to soften your message.

It would be better if you could agree to

instead of

This proposal is not acceptable

8. Use a continuous form (I was wondering) instead of a simple form (I wondered) to make a suggestion more flexible.

We were wondering if you would like to make a proposal.

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