Bill Ohanlon eBook

7/28/2019 Bill Ohanlon eBook

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Getting Back to Normal a conversation with Bill OHanlon

Preface

"Getting Back to Normal: The Great Depression Recovery Toolkit" is a 4-part series,aimed at helping the millions of Americans who have been laid-off and arestruggling to keep their heads above water both financially and emotionally. Thegoal of this toolkit is to help you get back to normal quickly as possible.


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Getting Back to Normal

Bill OHanlon , Mental Health Expert

Robert Pagliarini

Getting back to normal, the great depression recovery toolkit is a four part seriesaimed at helping the millions of Americans who have been laid off and arestruggling to get their heads above the water both financially and emotionally. The

goal of this toolkit is to help you get back to normal as quickly as possible. In orderto get back to normal we will tackle areas mental, physical, financial and career. So,this part one: mental. Everything starts here. I want to make sure youve got yourhead on straight. Prolong unemployment can mess your sense of self and yourconfidence. I want to make sure you have a healthy mindset and the confidence thatyou need. So, I brought in one of the leading mental health experts and therapist inthe country to work with us. His name is Bill OHanlon. Hes written 33 books andyouve probably seen him on Oprah, The Todays Show and many others. Hes acertified professional counselor and one of the developers of solution oriented

therapy.Bill thank you so much for taking the time to come on here, to share your wisdom

with us.

Bill OHanlon

Thank you, Robert. Its really important subject people are hurting and emotionallyhurting as well as financially hurting so we can say something today that will make alittle bit of a difference or maybe a great difference with people.

Robert

Thats a great goal. You know, I get emails every single week from people who aretruly, truly struggling not just financially, not just because they dont have a job butbecause of this prolong unemployment for many of the people its almost as if theydont know what step to take next. Theyve lost their sense of confidence maybetheyve had a really great job and th ey felt on top of the world and now all of thesudden theyve been unemployed for six months or a year or two years and all of the


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Bill

Yes.

Robert

they were networking, they were confident, and emails and now its almost this,you know, learn helplessness nothing they do seems to work. So, what can that doto their sense of self and their confidence?

Bill

Well, I t hink, therere two things and I think one is we become so identified with our

jobs or our careers or the ability to make money and I remind people keep yourperspective. You had self esteem and self worth and you were an okay personbefore you ever had a job. Remember you had a few years living your early lifebefore you had a job, most people, remember that. Keep things in perspective. Youknow, I used to specialize in working with eating disorders. And I would get these

women that would come in, mostly women, and they would say I was really good this week or I was really bad this week and I would say, ooh, you know, Im a therapistand Im kind of sensitive to this stuff. Can you just change your language a little andsay, I did some things I was proud of this week. Or I did some things that I wasntproud of or I was unhappy about. Separate what you do from who you are. I thinkthats one of the things to start to get yourself out of that rut if youre judging yourself I dont have a job so Im a loser and Im worthless thats pretty generalization butalso equates all your worth with what you do rather than who you are.

Robert

I think that is absolutely what happens. This program is for both men and women Itend actually to get more emails from men, I thi nk its probably because for guystheir sort of self worth is tied to their net worth, its tied to what they do because asguys, you and I, we kind of feel this sense of responsibility like were supposed to

provide for our family and maybe weve done tha t for years or decades and all of thesudden that job is gone. That sense of financial security has evaporated and now,

were left with what am I going to do now?

Bill

Yeah. I think, well, you know, I think with women, you know, if youre a man thinkabout a woman staying home as a homemaker and all of the sudden starting to feel


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the eye and shaken me when I first got this terrible thing that happened to me and

say, the old Reynolds Price is dead you have to find a new version of you. You haveto find a whole new life. So, thats the first thing is, that old identity is no longer therethat was wrapped up in your work, in your career, in what you did before its gone.

Youve got to create a new identity and youve done it before you were a son andthen you became a father, you know, you were a teenager then you became anadult. Youve gone through identity changes before its time for another one. Shedthat old skin go to something new but what you say is really, really important. Thesecond point you made is if you orient to the past and whats not there its easy to getdiscouraged and depressed and stuck. Orienting to the future which is somethingthat human beings can do even in the darkest moments, Viktor Frankl who wrote abook called, Mans Search for Meaning has said, The freedom youve hadnobody can take away the freedom is to choose to point of you. And if you focus on

what you prefer in the future rather than whats missing in the past, eat your pride,lift your spirits a little and give you something to move tomorrow. Now, its notpsychotic optimism where you say, everythings going to be great you already triedthat at the beginning where you got laid off or when you lost your job. I mean to havesomething to look forward to. So, I love that you emphasize both getting a differentperspective in the present and orienting to a more hopeful future.

Robert

And by the way, Man Search for Meaning, what an incredible book that[overlapping conversation] one of my favorite books of all time.

Bill

Absolutely.

Robert

Just fantastic and so, actually, thats a great recommendation for anyone whos

feeling a little badly about themselves or their situation. You read that book and allof the sudden youre going to have a whole new appreciation for whatever it isyoure going through.

Bill

I think thats right. And you know, and to a certain extent, you know, watching thisterrible news that we watch or, you know, reading the news or hearing the news we


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can get kind of a distorted perspective but one of the things that positive

psychology, again, this research on what works and what makes people better in lifehas been happening in the last 15 years or 20 years, they say that appreciating whatyou do have rather than focusing on what you dont have tends to increase your wellbeing and your sense of satisfaction and your sense of happiness. So, take a fewminutes, I had a guy that told me that he has a practice when he lost his job henoticed 25 things before breakfast that he could be grateful for. And I said, thatsounds like it takes hours and he said, no. You know, when I go to the light switchand I turn it on the lights come on. You know, I ha ve a glass of water. Im not thirsty.Im not living homeless, you know. I still have a house even though Im inforeclosure. You know, I go to the shower and Ive hot water. You know, these smallthings that we can be appreciative for. I have a friend who talks to me every day.Those small things if you can think of, you dont have to think of 25, but even three orfour in the morning it sets the whole tone for the day as a tone of appreciation ratherthan resentment or frustration or depression.

Robert

Ye ah. Now, thats a great tip as well is just being grateful for what you have can besmall things like you flipping on the light switch like you mentioned or really bigthings like, wow, you know, Ive got my beautiful spouse, you know, laying next to

me to day and were in good health. Everything else kind of sucks but

Bill

Thats right.

Robert

Ive got my kids, Ive got my spouse.

Bill

Right.

Robert

Things arent quite as bad. And so, looking at the future can be very , very difficultfor a lot of people w hen theyre in that ditch. And so, lets say I was your client. And Icome to you and Ive been laid off maybe its been a year and half and Ive triedeverything and I tell you, Bill, you know what Ive tried everything, Im at sort of the


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end. Im pretty hopeless. I dont think that my future is going to be better than my

past. And Im really, really depress about that insight that what I once had was greatand I just dont see myself having this better future. How can you help me Bill?

Bill

Well, you know, you and I have this shared interest an approach to therapy calledsolution oriented therapy and its approach focuses on peoples strengths andabilities but it also have a future orientation as we were talking earlier and one of thesimple things that I would is say, lets imagine youve got a job. I know it seemsunrealistic now and it may never happen but lets imagine youve got a job what else

would change in your life? And theyd say, well, Id be probably, you know, feelinghappier. Id be looking people in the eyes. Id be going out to exercising andrunning again because Ive been too depressed to run. And theyd give me a list of all the things that would happen once they got a job. You know, and not just financialthings but emotional things th at mostly and relational things thats mostly where

were focusing on, Id say, is there any part of that you can start to do voluntarilyright away? So, just getting them out of that rut of right now they dont have a jobplus they have all these emotiona l, psychological relational things that arent going

well that are part of being discouraged about not having a job, we want to get you,keep you in that mode so youre not dipping so deeply into that rut of depression or

discouragement you dont take care of yourself and other ways because youstopped dressing, you know, everyday, look for a job because its ridiculous, youknow. What youd be doing? Well, Id be getting dressed every day. Id be gettingout of bed by eight oclock in the morning or seven oclock in the morning or

whatever I got out of bed. I just want to bring some of that positive future into thepresent in a realistic way, not in again a psychotically optimistic way.

Robert

And so, that is a fantastic exercise sort of a miracle question asked.

Bill

Yes.

Robert

And so, if someones not working with you which I wish everyone could because


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Robert

Bruce Lipton. Exactly. And what a fascinating book that was. And one of the quotesthat I remembered in there is that we used to think, all these experts, we use to thinkthat our genes determined our life.

Bill

Right.

Robert

But it turns out that our life determines our genes and its the exact same concept that

were talking about that once we start thinking in certain way and almost developthat rut, like you said, in the brain we develop these pathways and we re-enforcethem over and over and over. And so, we got to, as your book points out, do onething different to sort of break, jump the tracks. Jumps [overlapping conversation]

Bill

And thats what this whole series is about. People, you know, I think people, who arelistening to this or reading this, sure watching this, should give themselves a littlecredit. You did one thing different. You didnt just sit on the couch and think its

hopeless; I cant get a job nothings going to change. You took a little action andsaid, let me give this thing a chance and see if theres anything here that andhopefully something that you say that one of your guest say or one of the experts say

well make a little bit of difference. So youre doing something, give yourself somecredit the way you kind of get lost is if you stop doing anything that can possiblymake a difference. Not everything youll do will work but youve got to start doingsomething. Thinking differently, doing something differently, relating differently,physically doing something different, you know, getting up and moving any of thatstuff might make a difference so try what you can and wait for something to work.

Robert

And so, your book, one of your 33 books, really, really great. What I think isapplicable here is its called, Do One Thi ng Different: Ten Simple Ways to Change

Your Life. And really, the take away from that is if youre stuck, if youre not reallyhappy with whatever the situation is, whether its relationship, your job or in life, thatyou can continue doing exactly the s ame that youve been doing but you probably


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get the same results. So, your concept is do one thing different and whats great is

that the name of the book is not doing one right thing different or Bill

No.

Robert

or do one exceptional thing different its just do something anything different.

Bill

Right. Life is an experiment and the experiments youve been doing recently if itsnot working try a different experiment. I think thats right, Ive heard a Native American saying a while ago from the Dakota tribe that said, when you discoveryoure riding a dead horse the best strategy is to dismount. So, do somethingdifferent, stop doing what youve been doing that hasnt been working and trysomething new because thats sort of a trap that everything fall s into partly becauseof this brain grooving that will happens but partly because we get a little righteous.We decide or what we think is the right way to think the way were seeing it is trueand we realize as you go through life, well, that was my point of view at that point butmaybe there was another point of view that was equally valid or better and so, what

were suggesting in this whole program I think what youre up to in this wholeprogram is giving people a new perspective and some new options. So, just get intolife as an experiment rather than life as already settled, life as an ongoingexperiment till youre off the planet.

Robert

And I really like how you complimented the listeners and the audience here becauseyoure right, the mere fact that they are participating with us means that they aredoing something different. Something they did today was different in order for them

to get to this point. And so they should be complimented for that.

The other thing that we talked about was the importance of maintaining relationships whether its with friends, family and Im wondering though if there could be a darkside to that because lets say I got laid off and a few of my buddies got laid off and atfirst we were working together optimistic, helpin g each other and I dont know,maybe the last few months we kind of get together we drink a couple of beers and


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we just kind of lament about how everything sucks and how this just the economys

terrible and, you know, the politician theyre looking to get us and we kind of startfeeding this negativity, can you see that happening?

Bill

Yes, definitely. Thats why I mentioned earlier the positive social relationships. Itdoesnt mean that every moment has to be wonderful but heres my quick, youknow, read on this or quick meter that I have within myself and I suggest to myclients and that is if you spent time with a person on a regular basis and you leavedrain or feeling worse, feeling angrier feeling worse, and thats your typicalexperience and I reduce the amount of time spent with that person and you knowthere are other people you just have a conversation with them, they get you to laugh,they can get you new perspective, they can give you some validation or support,they can give you some sense of hope or energy. When you leave them or theconversation so the interactions you have with them or do you feel a little morepositive, a little more energy, a little more hope; spend a little more time with thosepeople during this difficult time for you. You ve got to be really careful its likeeating the right foods or not drinking too much alcohol. You have to be really carefulof your inputs at this point because youre vulnerable because you could have atendency to get too discourage or depressed or drink too much or develop some of

those not helpful habits same things socially. There can be relationships that arentso great for you. Not in the long run but when youre stronger, when youre doingbetter you can go back to those relationships but maybe distance them a little fornow if theyre negative social relationships.

Robert

Great, great point. About a year ago I wrote a column called something about whenyou should break up with your mother? And its this concept therere really twotypes of people in the world, I think, that there are those that are assets to you that

when youre around them theyre optimistic, theyre supportive, they care aboutyou, you feel good, they give you energy. And then of course there is everyone else

when youre around them you feel just less then, theyre pessimistic, theyrenegative, you just feel badly. And especially as, like you identified, when yourestruggling in a period like this its even more critical to sort of ditch the liabilities inyour life maybe temporarily and maybe forever and really just focus on those


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handful of key relationships where you feel good and where they support you

because thats just so important right now.Bill

Well, yeah, and I think theres an old country song that says lifes too l ong for that,you know, its not only too short but its too long for that. youre going to be hangingout with these people for a long time and obviously were talking about in balancethere maybe a day thats off or its not so great in a relationship but if its an ongoingnegative relationship probably yes, either get some distance for now or maybe forgood.

Robert

Yeah. And you mentioned earlier that if you get to the point where, I dont know,maybe youre sort of you feel like youre at the end of t he rope that you should seeksome more professional assistance.

Bill

Yes.

Robert

You start with books and your friends but at what point would you say, you know what, pick up that phone maybe schedule a meeting with somebody.

Bill

Right. Or have somebody else pick up the phone. Sometimes when youre sodepressed picking up the phone seems daunting, talking to somebody new seemsdaunting so, use that social network and get somebody else to call for you. Make anappointment get your buns off that couch or ou t of the bed and get there and thatsreally typically the time when youre just not getting out of bed, youre not getting

out the couch, youre not doing and youre feeling its not just a temporarydiscouragement blues, you really have soaked into, you know, more of a clinicaldepression. Your appetite changed. Your eating is changed radically. Youre just notdoing well and youre not getting out of that rut its a good idea to seek something.

Again, you can call I used to work as suicide crisis line and people would call upnot just with suicidal crisis but with depressed crises and wed steered them to theright resources and those things are free, they have them in almost every


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community. You can call for help; you can call the emergency hotline and s ay Im in

desperate shape I need some help. And just making that one step may again start topull you out of that deep, deep, deep rut that youre getting into and get some help if you need to. If you cant do it on your own or with your friends or social network, goget some professional help its out there, itll make the difference. The longer youspent in it, the worse it gets so, get yourself out of it as soon as you can and if youknow youre really seriously depress ed.

Robert

And as you mentioned earlier, a lot of these resources are very, very low cost if notfree. Theres a local community health center in my area that I actually volunteer atand for most people its free, its a sliding scale sometimes its $5 a session. And, youknow, well, well, worth it. This is an investment in really your life so, well, well worthchecking out. And, you know, I guess I would be remissed if I didnt say, if someones listening to this program and its in their feeling a sense of desperation orare hurting themselves, what should they do at that point? Call the suicide hotline?

Bill

Yeah, absolutely. Well, talk to somebody new. You know, again, its that withdrawalthing thats a dangerous sign. Talk to somebody near you, let them know whatsreally going on with you in the most honest way you can, you know, theres noshame in that. Thats, you know, I think what change us. When I was a youngerperson I used to be such a stigma, oh no, youre depress or oh no you went to, youknow, if youre going to see a psychia trist you should just have your head examinedthat was sort of the attitude now theres so much more acceptance. Its in the movies,on TV; your friends have gone so go get help. Theres nothing to be ashamed about.Its just support while youre going thr ough this difficult period, so, yes, reach outsuicide hotline, call a mental health center, call a local health center, talk to yourfriends, talk to people that you know that know somebody who have been to

therapy, get a recommendation and go get some help.Robert

And really the only reason that we are speaking today is because I got an email froma gentlemen who was suicidal and not when he emailed me he said it had beenabout a month but he was at the point where he was suicidal. He had beenunemployed for about a year and a half and he got some help, thankfully. But he


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shared with me with this very long email his story and just how bad it got for him.

And after reading that I thought he is not alone out there. Maybe its not to the samelevel that he experienced for everyone but there is this general sense of hopelessness for a lot of people.

Bill

Well, I agree. When I used to work on suicide crisis line, people would call and they would only see one option or two options. Be miserable like I am or have it be worseor die. And we made a breakthrough on the telephone because we usually would

when they see at least a third option. I joke with them at a certain point when I had alittle bit of a relationship with them and say well you can always have a banana boatto Brazil I mean, you know, give up this life here and they would laugh, and I say, no,Im not talking about hopping a banana boat to Brazil lets come up with a thirdoption thats different from stay miserable or kill yourself. Theres almost al ways athird option for almost everybody. Go get some help but realize youre stuck in akind of a narrow perspective and dont end your life over this. Its not worth endingyour life over this stuff.

Robert

Thats third option. That is quite profound Iv e never really thought of that before when someones at that level where its either be miserable or end it all. And wow,theres always a third option.

Bill

Yeah. Thats a start choice. And, you know, I think thats a perspective that they getinto when t hey get so discouraged. And 24 hours later theyll probably remembersomething else or think of something else or if they have a conversation withsomebody else theyll realize theres a slightly different perspective you could justso narrowed down it see ms like those arent your only two choices. So, yeah, thats

probably a distorted point of view, please dont go with that, usually thats suicidalstuff will pass in a short time if you get some help, if you talk to somebody if you getthrough those desperate moments.

Robert

One of the ideas that Ive actually interviewed Professor Jeffrey Pfeffer about is thisidea of faking it until you make it. And this concept if you dont feel confident if you


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dont feel like you have this real strong sense of self e steem are there things that you

can do to kind of pretend that you have confidence.Bill

Oh, yeah, the old psychology said you have to go inside and work on your insideand you feelings and your childhood and all that stuff.

Robert

Yeah, right.

Bill

You can go out and do it but new style psychology said do it and then the feeling willfollow.

Robert

Yes.

Bill

So you do a more positive thing and you might feel more positive feeling. So, I thinkthey go together. Obviously, the insides affect the outside and the outside affect theinsides but because youre not feeling so good right now its extra important to godo something that might help you feel better.

Robert

Yeah, and one of the things you talked about is a recent study in that, you know, twogroups of people randomly selected. One group they were told to sort of move theirbodies in a depress way and the other group they were told to stand straight and puttheir shoulders back and to look people in the eye and to put their head up and asyou suggested, people who were pretending to be confident felt more confident.The other piece that Ive add and it goes back to this whole biology of belief that wetalked about is that they tested the blood of both sort of groups. And the group thatsimply pretended that they were more confident in their blood work shows that theyhave much less cortisol which is the stress hormone, and that it actually just bymoving differently change their biology.


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Bill

I think thats great. That, you know, and again, thats somethin g we sort of newintuitively but its great to have that scientific support for it thats what Robert and Ihave been talking about this whole conversation is, get, you know, shift your mind,shift your actions, shift you interactions and I call it, you know, change the doing,change the viewing and change the context. If youre thinking about doesnt work,shift the viewing, shift the point of view, and shift your perspective. If what you doingisnt working to get you the results, shift the doing, change the doing, change theinteractions, change your actions. And if youre in a context thats not so good youresitting around in the couch all the time get out the house, do something different. Go

some place. Be around different people. Take a different route, you know, when yougo to the unemployment office or whatever it may be. Do something different.Change your context or change the doing, change the viewing, change the context.If you change any of those things in the small way were talking about, ba by stepsbob or Robert, baby steps Robert and, you know, then you might get out of thatnegative groove and that discourage you.

Robert

And so, lets say optimistically, someone listens to this whole program and feeling alittle bit better, maybe not great but theyre feeling a little bit better and they get acall back on an interview. And what are some things that they can do to project thissense of confidence or to feel better when they go in?

Bill

Right. I think what Professor Pfeffer said was great and that was act as if, what wouldyou do if you were in the prime of your career and doing really well? How would youdress? How would you do your hair? How would you walk? How would you stand?What time would you get there? What would you do to prepare? You know, putyourself in that as if mind frame. I think thats great because right now youre not inthat mind frame thinking, oh, theyre not going to hire me or maybe they wont hireme or Im not good enough. Put yourself in other frame of mind and physi cally see if you can get yourself there. Dress that way and think that way and put your body inthat position if you can. It might make a difference. We dont mean, you know,pretend fake, you know, that you dontyoure not really that. I mean put yoursel f inthat as if I were framework. I think thats a great phrase.


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Robert

Yeah, and I mean, one of the things that I just love about solution oriented therapy isthat it doesnt really focus so much on what the problem is. It sort of jumps the wallso youve got problem, youve got the wall and youve got the solution on the otherside and it jumps over the wall. Now, youre living in sort of solutionville. And itslike

Bill

I think thats right.

Robert

Yeah. Its like what if you were in solution land what would be different? Andexactly what youre talking about, you know

Bill

Because I think we get hypnotized by problems. Problems tell us certain thingsabout ourselves and they get us to focus on certain things. What isnt working?Whats wrong with thi s? How thing will never work? And I agree, if you can jumpover that wall even for a brief time, all of the sudden you see things you never saw.

You see resources, abilities, strengths, all that stuff, if you can make that small shift inperspective that a s if, a lot of other things can follow thats great.

Robert

Okay. So, tough question here, lets say someone skip everything else and now they just come on the line here. And so, I want to provide them some kind of actionablesummary that they can say okay , I can do this. Ive heard a lot and Ive learned a lotbut like you say, what is that baby step? What is that one next thing that I should do?

Bill

Here it is, very simply. If what youre doing isnt working, do something differentand that means think something different, view something differently, get yourself out of the different context or take some different actions or interactively. Take smallsteps, dont try to overwhelm yourself. Dont try to do everything you want. Youknow, just one small thing you can do today, this morning, this hour, and this minute.Whats one small thing and if youre lying in bed depressed and youre focused on


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youll never going to get a job shift your perspective and think of something else.

Thing of what youre grateful for, the small things youre grateful for, think of whatyou could do rather than what you cant do. Think of who youre going to be ratherthan who used to be that you cant get back to. Thats as simple [overlappingconversation]

Robert

Love that. Lov e that. And so, let me play devils advocate just for a moment because Iknow, I know people are thinking this. And that is, Im kind of hopeless right now Idont think my futures going to be any better. Tell me why is that wrong? Why canmy future be better than it is right this moment?

Bill

Oh, yes, thats right. Only God knows whats the future is. Youre playing god in yourown like you say; I know its never going to be any better. The best thing, Robertthat I can tell you right now is you dont know what your futures going to be. But youmight have it a chance to influence that future but if you keep thinking its going tobe terrible and nothings going to happen you wont do anything to make that betterfuture. So, no guarantee if you get out of bed and try something and do somethingdifferent your future would be better but we can almost guarantee if you stand bad,you know, loss in that self pity and lost in that negative rut, probably the future isgoing to be much like today. So, get out of there and do something, get of off thecouch and do something, keep your social relationships going and shift in any small

way you can. Dont put too much pressure on yourself. Dont try and take too big aleap but take a small baby step baby step.

Robert

Fantastic advice. Hang out with friends, be grateful for what you have, think of a fewthings every day that you really, really would desperately missed if they werent in

your life. And some great book we have talked about certainly Viktor Frankls ManSe arch for Meaning, your own book which I would highly recommend its called,Do One Thing Different: Ten Simple Ways to Change Your Life. And you also havea really cool website with a lot of information. And Im going to tell people what thatis: its www.billohanlon.com . So its Bill, B~I~L~L O~H~A~N~L~O~N.com and you alsodo quite a few webinars and teleseminars and you are, from what I gather, I haventhad the privileged to hear you but supposed to be one amazing public speaker.
http://www.billohanlon.com/http://www.billohanlon.com/http://www.billohanlon.com/http://www.billohanlon.com/


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Bill

Thank you. I was a shy person; this is why Im such an optimist for the future. I was ashy person who didnt like to speak in front of people and I got so passionate aboutthese stuff that weve been talking about today that I ov ercame my fears and becamea public speaker and I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it. And so, yes, I got a littlebetter over the years and less gastrointestinal symptoms when I stand in the livecrowd. Its great. Its great.

Robert

I like how you s aid less and not none. Thats, yeah, thats so true. So people go

to your website, they can see, you know, what youre going to be doing. Maybesome [overlapping conversation]

Bill

Yeah, I travelled around and, you know, I write books probably one or two a yearthese days so they can find out what Im up to. Occasionally, I do free teleseminarsand things like that.

Robert

This has been absolutely fantastic, Bill. I really, really appreciate your time, yourinsight, I mean; you are a master at this who le solution oriented sort of paradigm. Itsa whole new way of looking at life and more importantly at how to change.

Bill

Yeah, were the mirror image of Freud. We dont go back to your childhood, wefigure out whats happening right now, where you want t o go and find the strengthsand the abilities to get there. So, I hope some people explore that if theyre stuck. Imean theres value to that Freudian kind of stuff and therere value to this stuff.

Robert

Right. Well, thank you again Bill. Again, your website is www.billohanlon.com one of
http://www.billohanlon.com/http://www.billohanlon.com/http://www.billohanlon.com/http://www.billohanlon.com/


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the 33 books is Do One Thing Different absolutely check it out. Thank you again

Bill.Bill

Thanks.

Join Robert Pagliarini, Best-Selling Author, Entrepreneur,Wealth Creator, and TV Commentator as he has compelling

conversations with experts that drive more money, motivation,

and meaning into your life, at www.RicherLife.com.
http://www.richerlife.com/http://www.richerlife.com/


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About Bill OHanlon

Bill OHanlon is a psychotherapist who was adeveloper of Solution-Oriented Therapy and afounder of Possibility and Inclusive Therapies.His clinical work is recognized for itscollaborative respectful approach to clients.He is known for his storytelling, irreverenthumor, clear and accessible presentation styleand his psychotic enthusiasm for whatever heis doing.

Bill began his professional career in 1975 as ahippie transpersonal counselor at the A.R.E.(Edgar Cayce) Clinic in Phoenix, Arizona.Earlier he ran growth groups and taughtseminars at the Phoenix growth centerSentheon. Deciding he really ought to knowsomething more about what he was doing, hestudied Neuro-Linguistic Programming(before they even had a name for it) andultimately went back to school and became a

marriage and family therapist. During graduate school he studied with the eccentricand creative psychiatrist Milton Erickson and became Erickson's gardener (he wasDr. Erickson's only work/study student). He was so confused and impressed by Dr.Erickson's work, he felt compelled to spend the next several years of his career

writing and teaching in an effort to make Erickson's approach more understandable

and accessible. Bill then moved on to develop his own method, the Solution-Oriented Approach, a brief approach to change focused on identifying and usingstrengths to reach goals and overcome challenges. It has been applied withindividuals, couples, families and organizations.

Bill has now authored or co-authored 30 books. Always looking for a challenge, Billnow brings his ideas to a wider audience. In 1999, he appeared on Oprah with his


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book, Do One Thing Different: Ten Simple Ways to Change Your Life . He has alsoappeared on The Today Show , Canada AM , and Body By Jake . His work has beenfeatured in O Oprah's magazine, Ladies Home Journal , New Woman , Newsweek ,

Bottom Line , Self , Women's Health and The Psychotherapy Networker .

Bill OHanlon on Facebook

Bill OHanlon on Twitter
http://www.facebook.com/bill.ohanlonhttp://www.facebook.com/bill.ohanlonhttp://www.facebook.com/bill.ohanlonhttp://twitter.com/#!/POSSIBILLhttp://twitter.com/#!/POSSIBILLhttp://twitter.com/#!/POSSIBILLhttp://www.facebook.com/bill.ohanlon


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Makeover, Plan Z: How to Survive the 2009 Financial Crisis (and even live a littlebetter), and The Other 8 Hours:

Maximize Your Free Time to Create New Wealth & Purpose, he writes a personaldevelopment column for CBS that is syndicated to newspapers (e.g., ChicagoTribune, LA Times, Orange County Register) and popular online websites includingthe Huffington Post and many others. Robert has also had multiple appearances onGood Morning America as well as Dr. Phil, 20/20, ABC News and others. For futureappearances, Robert will be identified as the founder of Richer Life Insights.

Robert is the president of Pacifica Wealth Advisors, Inc. , a boutique wealthmanagement firm specializing in sudden money recipients. He is a CertifiedFinancial Planner, has a masters degree in financial services, and is currentlycompleting a master's degree in counseling psychology.

When not working, Robert enjoys going to Disneyland with his wife and youngdaughter, attending Saddleback Church, and running a non-profit he co-foundedcalled the Band of Brothers Foundation that helps impoverished kids around the

world.

Robert on Facebook

Robert on Twitter
http://www.pacificawealth.com/http://www.pacificawealth.com/http://www.pacificawealth.com/http://bobf.org/http://bobf.org/http://bobf.org/http://www.other8fan.com/http://www.other8fan.com/http://twitter.com/rpagliarinihttp://twitter.com/rpagliarinihttp://twitter.com/rpagliarinihttp://www.other8fan.com/http://bobf.org/http://www.pacificawealth.com/


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For More Information If you enjoyed this ebook and would like to learn more, go to Richer Life Insights forthe audio interview, videos, and sign up for our voicemail coaching.

www.richerlife.com
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