26 Good News Travels Well

34 The Passage for India

54 Trust is Key

56 Making Contact

68 Fifi and the World Pup

72 The Beautiful Con

Official Mouthpiece of

The much hoped for and much hyped 500 000 overseas

visitors did not materialise, and I doubt whether we got

half that number. But we didn’t care. Our locals more

than made up for the disappointment, in both numbers

and noise. We suspended our faculties to allow FIFA to run the

country, and we gave up our lives for this global juggernaut. It was

a party of note, and South Africa’s global profile has been

enhanced beyond comprehension. We may have bankrupted

ourselves, and Mr. Blatter’s bank balance may have gone through

the stratosphere, but did we have a jol!

Now, back to reality and back to work. We have a country to run

and sustain. The grindstone has been ignored while Eskom staff

and various other state employees have helped themselves to

ridiculous salary increments, and the road maintenance crews have

been conspicuous in their absence. Time to get the old economy

going again. ABR is happy to be part of the deal, not that we took

any sabbatical. This month our readers can partake of our usual

fare of news, views, updates, and more, all packaged in words in

action. ABR is also pleased to announce that we will be part of a

new initiative from Partinform, who will be creating a networking

event of note at the Automechanika to be held in Frankfurt,

Germany, in September. Read more about this on our AAMA

Alert on page 26.

Our cover story is a good example of what we’ve been saying. An

economy runs on wheels, and it is important that those wheels are

well looked after. The modern generation of vehicles do not suffer

fools gladly when it comes to maintenance. They require skilled

and well trained artisans, operating from up to date premises with

world class facilities and cutting edge equipment. South Africa has

many of these, but it needs to up its game in terms of numbers.

This is where franchises such as AutoCrew are important, and the

more the merrier. Read about this opportunity on page 18.

T h e P h o e n i x

A u g u s t 2 0 1 02

South Africa has led a surrealistic existence these past two months. Wecounted down the days to 11 June, then indulged in an orgy of fascina-tion with a round ball dubbed Jabulani, and welcomed thirty two soccerteams from around the globe. We flocked in our droves to ten stadiums innine cities, and blew our vuvuzelas with zest. Then, after an indulgent 30days, our three week hangover began on 12 July.

Back to Work

Whilst this issue of ABR is jam packed with information, our monthly contribution cannot do justice to thewealth of information available on a daily basis, so don’t forget to get your daily fix on our website.

Make sure that you make regular visits to www.abrbuzz.co.za

Publishing EditorGraham ErasmusCell: 083 709 8184

Editors at LargeAlwyn ViljoenPaul Collings

Intelli-Driving EditorEugene Herbert

CorrespondentsBeeton, FrankBorlz, Baron ClaudeBurford, AdrianFoster, GavinGamble, Austin

Hogg, GilbertKeeg, HowardMcCleery, RogerPhitidis, PavloTwine, TonyWilde, Fingal

Published byTrilogy Publishing

Advertising SalesMarlene ErasmusCell: 082 837 2668E-mail: bigheart2@iafrica.comGraham Hudson-LambCell: 083 325 4146E-mail: bigheart3@iafrica.com

Editorial Office81 Alma Road, WendywoodTel: 27 11 656 2198Fax: 27 11 802 3979E-mail: bigheart@iafrica.comWebsite: www.abrbuzz.co.za

Subscriptions and DataManagementTrilogy Trading & PromotionP O Box 69Wendywood 2144Tel: 27 11 802 6020Fax: 27 11 802 3979E-mail: bigheart2@iafrica.com

Design and Reproductionj. Kraft Information Design ccTel: 012 997 6946 Fax: 012 997 6987E-mail: jackie@kraftinfo.co.za

PrintingBusiness Print Centre, Pretoria

C o n t e n t s

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4

Official Mouthpiece of

2 The Phoenix

8 What’s the Buzz

14 Tyre Talk

16 AIDC Quiz

18 The Changing Face of Auto Repair

26 AAMA Alert

28 Personal Profile

30 Auto Topical

32 Intelli-Driving

34 Frankly Speaking

36 The Chery Story

38 Training Initiatives

40 Tony’s Take

44 Weighty Issues

46 Entrepreneurship

48 Diamond Dialogues

50 Customer C.A.R.E.

52 Tyre Safety

54 e-CAR

56 The Golden Triangle

57 Workshop Update

58 Capricorn Insights

60 Vehicle Launch

62 Life Goes on

64 Top Class Topics

66 Consumer Protection Act

68 Dog Day Afternoon

70 Wilde things

72 Hogg Wash

74 NMMU Racing

76 The Fink

78 Fast Wheels

79 Midas Sport

80 The Last Writes

The publisher and contributors have done their best to ensure the accuracy of the articles and cannot accept responsibility forany loss or inconvenience sustained by any reader as a result of information or advice in Automotive Business Review. Theinformation provided and opinions expressed in this publication are provided in good faith and do not necessaraly representthe opinion of the publisher. No article may be reproduced in any form without the prior written permission from the pub-lisher, except for the quotation of brief passages in reviews.

Photo Credits: Quickpics • Motorpics

W h a t ’ s t h e B u z z ?

A u g u s t 2 0 1 08

KenKen 7 x 7How to Play:

Like Sudoku, even though difficulty may vary from puzzle to puzzle, the rules for

playing KenKen are fairly simple:

For a 3 x 3 puzzle, fill in with the numbers 1-7.

• Do not repeat a number in any row or column.

• The numbers in each heavily outlined set of squares, called cages, must combine (in any

order) to produce the target number in the top corner of the cage using the mathematical

operation indicated.

• Cages with just one box should be filled in with the target number in the top corner.

• A number can be repeated within a cage as long as it is not in the same row or

column. Answer on page 80

Tenneco SouthAfrica receivesinternationalawardTenneco South Africa was awarded aTenneco International PerformanceAward for 2009 at the recent TennecoAftermarket Information Conferenceheld outside Brussels in Belgium.Megan Naiker, Country Manager forMonroe and Rancho aftermarketproducts in southern Africa, proudlyaccepted the award for the best per-forming country in the Europe/Africaregion.

In the latest available global statistics, South Africa ranksthird highest in the fatality rate per 10 000 vehicles. A sober-ing enough thought, but a new study suggests that our roaddeath toll has been under-estimated by more than half. Whilethe Department of Transport gives a figure of 10 000 eachyear, CARS (Committee for Active Road Safety) says in real-ity it is nearer 18 000. Grant McCleery, a multiple SA motor-sport champion, who heads up Yokohama DrivingDynamics, has been teaching specialised driving skills fornearly two decades and in his opinion, every man, womanand especially teenager, needs more than just basic drivertraining to ensure their safety on our road. Yokohama DrivingDynamics offers a range of one-day courses that will teachyour child these essential driving skills. A level 1 AdvancedDriving Skills Course makes a novel birthday or graduationpresent and thereafter, they can build on it with Levels 2 and3, of courses like 4x4 driving, hijack prevention, self-protec-tion and more. Yokohama Driving Dynamics is based atGerotek Vehicle Test Facility near Pretoria and also offers itscourses at a variety of venues, countrywide. For more infor-mation, call the company on (011) 431 - 2000 or visit thewebsite on http://www.drivingdynamics.co.za

Suzuki on top of the world – five times in a rowIt’s been called the toughest uphill race in the world – and the most treacherous, with a mix of tar and gravel surfaces, serpentine corners and dizzying precipices. But despite some tough and committed competition, nothing could deter Nobuhiro ‘Monster’ Tajima from taking an amazingfifth consecutive victory at the annual Pikes Peak International Hill Climb at the wheel of a purpose-built Suzuki SX4 hill climb racer. The leg-endary driver covered the 19,87 km course, with its 156 corners, in a time of 10 min 11,49 seconds – more than 5 seconds quicker than last year,but still tantalisingly short of the 10 min 01,408 sec record, set by Tajima in 2007. The Suzuki driver was not only aiming for a fifth consecutiveoverall victory, but had set his sights on a new record, especially after setting the fastest ever qualifying time earlier in the week. But despite whatappeared to be a clean run, the record still stands. “I am very disappointed,” Tajima was reported as saying. “The car and everything worked well.”

From left to right: Alex Gelbcke - Vice President and General Manager, Aftermarket Europe(including Africa) Megan Naiker, - Country Manager Aftermarket, Southern Africa and Didier

Longret - Business Development Director Aftermarket Europe (including Africa)

ADVANCED DRIVING SKILLS DESPERATELY NEEDED

W h a t ’ s t h e B u z z ?

12 A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

Dekra and the AA worktogether to help fight fraud

and make roads safer

With the ever-present corruption in the vehi-cle testing industry and the large number ofunroadworthy vehicles on the roads thathave fraudulent roadworthy and fitness cer-

tificates, Dekra Automotive is initiating proven Europeantechnology to ensure that a vehicle has been tested accord-ing to the highest standards and is indeed roadworthy.“The AA supports the efforts our partner, DekraAutomotive is making in order to improve the level ofsafety on our roads by implementing technology that hasproven to be a success in some European countries,” saidKaren Bryden, MD of the Automobile Association. Beforea vehicle can be deemed roadworthy, it will undergo astringent Roadworthy Test and on passing, a uniqueDekra Roadworthy Sticker will be placed on the back ofthe truck and in the inside of the driver’s door for a pas-senger vehicle, to show that it is roadworthy. Designed inGermany, the Dekra Roadworthy Sticker uses the latestsecurity technology to ensure that it is impossible to dupli-cate or remove it from a vehicle and stick it on anotherone. The Dekra Roadworthy Sticker has six distinctivesecurity features, thereby ensuring that it conforms to thehighest standards of document security available today.

FROM DEZIR TOREALITYRenault has provided a preview glimpse ofits new concept car, DeZir, ahead of thisyear's Paris Motor Show. DeZir stands outas an illustration of the brand's commit-ment to more emotional styling. DeZir'ssensuous lines and bright red finish expresspassion. Powered by an electric motor,DeZir is proof that environmental concernand a love for cars are by no means incom-patible. The DeZir project is the first tohave been led by Laurens van den Ackerand marks the start of a sequence of con-cept cars that will provide an insight intoRenault Design's new vision for the future.It also lays the foundations for the stylingcues of Renault's forthcoming vehicles.The public will get its first opportunity tosee DeZir at the 2010 Paris Motor Show.

Fiat’s Revolutionary 900cc TwinAir two-cylinder enginedebuts in the Cinquecento

To celebrate the Cinquecento’s third birthday, Fiat is introducing an innovative 900ccTwinAir two-cylinder 63 kW / 85 HP which will be marketed in Europe starting fromSeptember on the 500 (hatch and cabrio alike). This revolutionary engine will definitely‘worm’ its way into South African Cinquecentos in 2011. The first of a new family of two-

cylinder engines made by FPT - Fiat PowertrainTechnologies, it implements the revolutionaryMultiAir system combined with specific fluiddynamics optimised for maximum fuel effi-ciency. Furthermore, by taking the conceptof downsizing to the extreme and masterful-ly tuning the basic mechanics, the new fam-ily – delivering from 48 kW to 78 kW –emits 30% less CO2 than an engine of equalperformance. Significantly the new 900ccTwinAir 63 kW two-cylinder engine willcomplement the many technological solu-tions already adopted by the Fiat 500 tocontain consumption and emissions asdemonstrated by the recent expansion of the

engine range, now featuring a second-genera-tion 1.3 MultiJet diesel (European markets only)

delivering power of up to 71 kW. With 8 injectionsper cycle, the 1.3 MultiJet II improves low rpm torque

delivery by up to 38% and cuts CO2 emissions by 6%.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 014

Dr Ettienne Human, CEO of

the South African Tyre

Recycling Programme, con-

firmed that this government-

sanctioned Section 21 company would

issue nine tenders during August 2010 to

find transporters for “close to 95,000 tons

of waste tyres” in each province. The

successful bidders will have to establish

“transfer sites” at an estimated cost of

“between R20 million and R50 million” to

store and sort waste tyres. These sorted

tyres must then be trucked to the still-to-

be-appointed provincial “waste tyre

processor”, for whom the SATRP plans to

issue tenders “possibly during September”.

The successful waste tyre processor will

have to apply for licences to operate a

waste management facility from the

Department of Environmental Affairs, on

whose behest the Integrated Waste Tyre

Management Plan was created.

Albi Modise, Chief Director of

Communications at the Department of

Environmental Affairs (DEA) said the

DEA’s primary objective was to establish a

regulation that “controls the collection and

disposal of discarded tyres in South Africa,

using a network of registered waste-tyre

collection agents and accredited waste-tyre

users.” The regulations also aim to pro-

mote the establishment of “a sustainable,

environmentally sound, waste-tyre user

industry, favouring material recycling and

energy recovery, with a view to attaining

the goal of zero waste-tyre disposal to land-

fill. Job and wealth creation could be an

additional benefit.” “Of the four

Integrated Industry Waste management

plans which were received, only one met

the criteria for preparation of waste tyre

management plans, as set out in the Waste

Tyre Regulations,” said Modise.

This plan belongs to the SATRP and is

called the Integrated Waste Tyre

Management Plan. According to

Dr Human, “The Plan” is based on similar

successful plans operating in Europe and

the USA, which call for waste

tyres to be crumbed, or com-

bined with polymer products,

or used as fuel instead of coal.

Rico Euripidou from the groundWork

Friends of the Earth SA, said the organisa-

tion was “very worried” that the SATRP,

the waste tyre regulations and associated

green levy would become a "slush fund"

for the sole benefit of cement kilns, who

will basically get a government subsidy to

use free fuel. He pointed out that crumb-

ing of tyres could grow in SA, but current

recycling regulations made it impossible

for small businesses to recycle waste tyres

and show a profit. Euripidou said to recov-

er the outlay, a tyre transporter would need

to collect at least one million tyres per year,

working within a 200km radius. “Because

the cubic capacity of tyres is too large, and

the value too low, long-distance road trans-

port from more the 200km away is not

cost-effective.” Only Gauteng has enough

traffic to meet these two requirements,

with the other provinces having tyres that

are “too few and too far apart”. He also

cited US case studies which showed that

crumbing could only be done profitably if

done at scale and with government subsi-

dising the costs.

He quoted the SATRP’s costs to grind a

ton of tyres being “about R1600”, or

R1.60 per kilogramme.

“A South African tyre grinder should

therefore receive a disposal fee of about

R12.00 per passenger tyre.

But the SATRP’s suggested disposal fee

equates to only R1.05 per passenger tyre.

“As things stand, it

is almost inevitable

that tyres will be

burned in cement

kilns. The cement

industry is already

doing trial runs and

is likely to establish

themselves as the

primary users of

waste tyres right

from the start,” con-

cluded Euripidou.

T y r e T a l k

Opinions divided on feasibility of “The Plan”

Funding “the plan”To date, more than 85% of SouthAfrica’s tyre producers and importershave already subscribed to the SATRPIntegrated Waste Tyre ManagementPlan. Subscribers are obliged to sign a"Conditional Agreement" with theSATRP Company and pay a contract feeof R11400 to defray the legal andadministrative costs involved.

The running costs of SATRP will befunded by a Green Fee, which will belevied on all passenger and commercial vehicle tyres produced by the subscribersto the “the Plan. This green fee willapply to rim sizes from 8 inches to 25 inches and include the cost of themanagement process. The exact totalwill only be confirmed after the varioustenders have been awarded.

Dr Human, CEO of the SA TyreRecycling Programme, has repeatedlygone on record that this fee will be cal-culated and audited to only cover thecosts of collecting and disposing wastetyres nationally, without any profit tothis Section 21 company. During theyears of planning, his estimates for thegreen fee started at R15 per passengertyre to R140 per truck tyre, which costwill be borne by the consumer.

by Alwyn Viljoen

Waste Tyre Regulationsnow a tender issue

Roger McCleery asks the questionsSee how many of these 20 Questions you can answer.

by Roger McCleery

Answers on page 78

1. What was the biggest selling passenger car in June?

2. Who won the Canadian Formula 1 Grand Prix?

3. What two car companies helped sponsor the World Cup?

4. From what country?

5. Where does Hyundai stand on the World Manufacturer rankings?

6. What Motorcycle World Champion has broken his leg?

7. What is the oldest racing circuit in South Africa?

8. What venue was used for AMID’s successful Motorcycle Show?

9. Where is South Africa’s only Motorcycle Museum?

10. What make of tyre will be used by Formula 1 in 2011?

11. When do VW state they will number 1 vehicle manufacturer in the world?

12. Who is the MD of VWSA?

13. Name two major motor groups that handle the Chinese Chery franchise in South Africa.

14. What company is the 2nd biggest commercial vehicle manufacturer in the world?

15. What bakkie broke Toyota’s 72-hour endurance record at Gerotek recently?

16. What tyres did they use?

17. The Opel Corsa Utility in Brazil has been renamed a - What?

18. What was the Swiss-born Chevrolet’s first name?

19. What company sponsors the closely contested Formula Ford Racing in South Africa this year?

20. What motor company exported the most motor vehicles from South Africa in May?

A I D C Q u i z

A u g u s t 2 0 1 016

On 12 January 2011, my car celebrates its 5th birthday. Nothing unusual

about this, especially when one considers that there are some nine to ten

million vehicles on our roads today, and the average age of these vehicles are

about 11 years. But for me and my vehicle this is a very important day, because

on its 5th birthday my car will no longer be protected by the manufacturer’s

warranty, and even more importantly, my car will be out of its service plan. On

the stroke of midnight on that auspicious day my attitude to servicing and

repairs will change dramatically.

It is as if I am on death row. Like a condemned manI am starting to appreciate the smaller things in life.The birds are swinging more sweetly, the colours ofthe flowers are so much brighter, the moon has be-come an evocative orb, and sunsets now bring meto tears. My days of carefree motoring are over!

From the 13th January I will dread each time my car has togo in for a service, and if repairs are needed I will go into pro-longed spasms of hyperventilation. I will be at the mercy ofthe agents’ high labour rates and even higher parts prices. Likemost of the population, I am not a do-it-yourselfer, and inany case, with any car manufactured after 1995 beyond thetechnical abilities of even the most ardent amateur, this hasbecome a moot point. To take my car to the workshop aroundthe corner with the rickety hoist is just too risky, and to callout a mobile mechanic whose van looks like an avant-gardesculpture even riskier. What are my options? Apart from

buying a new vehicle, which in the current economic situationis currently out of my reach. There are options, but they aretoo few and far between, particularly in my neck of thewoods. The best bet is a workshop that gives me confidence,and the knowledge that I am going to get first world serviceat reasonable rates. There are a few out there, the majority ofthem backed by well known and respected brands. But I wantmore, and so do millions of my fellow motorists. We need toknow that wherever we are, there is a workshop close by thatcan deliver the goods.

My hopes were raised when I came across an AutoCrewbrochure in the June 2010 issue of ABR. At last, a silver bulletfor the industry. Backed by Bosch, and with all the benefitsthat one would expect from such a huge organisation, AutoCrew is the answer for all independent workshops looking for the right partner.

by Howard Keeg

The Changing Face ofAutomotive Repair inSouth AfricaHoward Keeg takes a look at servicing and repair options

With the Consumer Protection Act coming into effect in October2010, all the independents are going to need a big brother, so the brochure spells it out clearly, “Owning an independent workshop in today’s business climate poses significantly morechallenges than in the past –

• Ongoing development in automotive technology, higher de-mand for diagnostics test equipment and technical training

• Requirement for workshops to have direct access to the latestvehicle service information

• High investment in workshop diagnostics tools and continuous technical training

• Vehicle systems and parts are now more complex• Replacement of parts often requires sophisticated equipmentand software

• Customers demands and expectations have increased• More and more customers choose a recognisable and trustedbrand

• Improved quality of vehicle parts, with extended service intervals

• Vehicle Manufacturers’ extended vehicle warranty• The pressure on workshops to deliver outstanding work atcompetitive prices

• Aggressive price competition• Cost effective marketing of workshop offerings on an ongoingbasis”

Exactly, and this is what it is all about, and consumers like me arechoosing a recognisable and trusted brand, and my demands andexpectations have been moulded by the new car experience. Thus,when I read the benefits of joining the AutoCrew Network, I getquite excited. I want the workshop around the corner to stayahead with a high-level of support from a trusted partner in theautomotive industry. Just listen to the rights and privileges youwill enjoy:

Strategic Partnership with Bosch – as a Bosch Automotiveworkshop brand, you will benefit from the latest automotive technology, technical support, workshop concept, and more

AutoCrew Brand – the AutoCrew brand is distinctive and easilyidentifiable to the consumer (that’s what I want!)

AutoCrew Membership – exclusive membership to an interna-tional workshop concept rapidly growing worldwide

Corporate Identity – The striking corporate identity includes allthe necessary signage, with additional options for maximum exposure (believe me, as a consumer I need to see this. I don’twant to search for you)

Corporate Clothing – to complete the corporate image, the AutoCrew workshops have fully branded work wear items (thisgives me peace of mind)

Low Entry Cost and Requirements – low entry costs and re-quirements with a high benefit portfolio (go figure!)

Marketing Support – in support of regional advertising AutoCrew members receive an advertising assistance disk, withnumerous artwork layouts ensuring your regional advertising isuniform and drives customers into your workshop

Customer Care Initiatives – as the network grows, a CustomerCare Line will be introduced to handle customer queries and referrals to AutoCrew outlets (I will definitely use this line)

National and Regional Events – conferences and meetings areavailable to the AutoCrew network ensuring ongoing develop-ment in the network (absolutely necessary)

There is far more, including a comprehensive technical supportpackage – just go to www.abrbuzz.co.za and click the AutoCrewlogo to get all the details.

If you join the AutoCrew Network, you will fit the followingprofile:

• An independent workshop with the right equipment and experience needed to execute professional work on a customer’s vehicle

• Clearly identifiable through a distinctive corporate identity

• Less focus on the frills and more focus on getting a decent jobdone

• A general focus on vehicle service and repairs

• Offering a comprehensive service package which meets therequirements and pockets of motorists

• Experience and competence with the right test equipment tosolve problems efficiently

• A dedication to providing customers with efficient andfriendly service

• Professionally trained on an ongoing basis to ensure stayingup to date with the latest vehicle technology developments

• A Bosch workshop brand

You will offer what I want:

• An enjoyable and quality experience at competitive prices

• Maintenance and repair of all vehicle makes and models

• OE quality replacement parts

• A basic workshop service offering with complementary serviceavailable at competitive prices

• Technical competence

• An entrepreneurial spirit

I, as the modern consumer, want to know that you are part ofAutoCrew, a leader on vehicle service and repair to all makesof passenger, light and medium commercial vehicles.

For more information, please contact:AutoCrew@za.bosch.com

Mohammed Abed was born to be a trail-blazer. After joining Thrifty CarRental in 2002 at the tender age of 19,he progressed rapidly up the ladder,from Retail Agent to Fleet Manager to

Branch Manager, and eventually Regional Manager forGauteng. He then took the plunge and joined his father’sused car business. It was this crossover experience thattaught Mohammed the importance of both a corporate culture and an entrepreneurial spirit. One of the first thingsthat Mohammed noticed in the used car business was thepoor quality condition of the trade-ins, and he had a battleto get these cars to top condition for resale, primarily because of the dearth of good workshops in Springs. Hissearch for a solution was fulfilled when he came across theAutoCrew concept. Now he is the proud owner of Auto M,and loves the fact that he is the “first AutoCrew in Africa”.More on Auto M in the next issue of ABR.

The TrailblazersAutoCrew is up and running and Howard Keeg visited the first two AutoCrews in SouthAfrica, to find out if the deeds match the words:There is an old Wild West saying that you can recognise pioneers by the arrows

sticking out of their backs. This was true for those pioneering days, but in

modern times it is those entrepreneurs who get in first who reap the biggest

benefits. Two outstanding entrepreneurs are Gideon Brits and Mohammed Abed,

the first brave souls to join the AutoCrew Network. I visited both Performer

2000 in Randpark Ridge and Auto M in Springs, the AutoCrew trailblazers for

Gauteng and South Africa, to find out what makes them tick, and why they stuck

up their hands at such an early stage.

Gideon Brits runs Performer 2000 inRandpark Ridge successfully and compe-tently. Performer 2000 has been servingthe community since 1996. He has alsobeing running a Bosch Service Centre inthe Hillfox Power Centre, Weltevreden

Park, for the past nine years, so he is fully aware that the back-ing of Bosch is critical. Thus, when he was introduced to theAutoCrew concept he did not hesitate to be the first to put uphis hand. Even though Performer 2000 was established Gideonrealised that there was something missing, and that somethingwas the fact that the more discerning customers were lookingfor a brand that they could trust, but also no frills service atcompetitive prices. Thus AutoCrew was a no-brainer forGideon, and I look forward to giving the ABR readers an update on this pioneer in the next couple of months.

Mohammed Abed with two of his handpicked technicians,Danie van Jaarsveld and Kobus du Preez

Gideon Brits with Performer 2000Service Manager Greg Milne

Volvo Cars has been invited to do-nate its historic three-point safetybelt to the Smithsonian NationalMuseum of American History. Themuseum officially accepted the giftat a ceremony on July 14. Thesafety belt is part of a larger collec-tion from eight different donors inwhich each article represents a sig-nificant aspect of 75 years of safety-enhancement work in the carindustry. Volvo created automotivehistory when the first car fitted asstandard with three-point safetybelts was delivered on August 13,1959. Since then, Nils Bohlin's in-vention has been fitted to millionsof cars the world over and is now ondisplay at one of the world's mostprestigious and largest museums,The Smithsonian National Mu-seum of American History in Wash-ington, DC, which receives aboutfour million visitors a year. Thethree-point belt has played and stillplays a vital role in helping to re-duce the number of injuries and fa-talities in road traffic. Volvo’sparticipation is the result of longand hard work on the part of VolvoCars in the USA, and it all beganwith a phone call over two yearsago. "The three-point safety beltturned 50 and fortunately there were already plans under way to show a collection of innovationsrelating to the automobile's history," relates Dan Johnston, product communications managerwith the Corporate Communications department at Volvo Cars of North America.

W h a t ’ s t h e B u z z ?

Tony Psaila aka Tony Tractor - Aroundthe World on a TractorTony Psaila alias Tony Tractor will be embarking on an epic round the world journey onthe 9th August 2010. Leaving from Howick, in KwaZulu Natal, he will be travellingthrough the country, and then on through to the rest of the world. Tony is a member ofthe Hilton Lions Club and his journey has been adopted by the Lions 410-C region as aregional project. As part of Tony's journey, he will be addressing members of the commu-nity. Tony focuses on inspiring people to shun violence and support survivors of abuse andviolence. His own life experience of having been shot and then having been resuscitatedinspired his first Tractor Trip. He travelled from Beitbridge to Cape Agulhas, raising aware-ness for the South Africa National Blood Service and R100 000 for the Midlands Crisisand Trauma Centre, in Howick KwaZulu Natal. Now Tony will be raising funds for 'The World Fund for Victims of Violence and Rape'.

Li Shufu to Become Chairman of the Board at

Volvo Car Corporation

Zhejiang Geely Holding Group Co., Ltd. ("Zhejiang Geely Holding Group") has announced that Li Shufu, its Chairman, will become Chairman ofthe Board at Volvo Car Corporation ("Volvo Cars"), pending completion of the acquisition of the company from Ford Motor Company. Geely alsonamed Hans-Olov Olsson as Vice-Chairman at Volvo Cars. Mr Olsson is a former President and Chief Executive of the Swedish car maker. Li Shufusaid: "We have made significant progress in assembling the team that will develop Volvo Cars under Geely's ownership. Today's board appointmentsunderline my personal commitment to this famous company." The announcement follows the separate disclosure by Ford Motor Company thatStephen Odell, currently CEO of Volvo Cars, will become Chairman and CEO of Ford of Europe. Ford also named Stuart Rowley, Chief FinancialOfficer of Volvo Cars, as the new chief financial officer, Ford of Europe. Both executives will remain in their current roles until completion of theVolvo Cars transaction. Under the proposed change of ownership, Volvo Cars will remain headquartered in Gothenburg, Sweden, with managementautonomy to execute on its business plan. As part of that business plan, Volvo Cars aims to strengthen its presence in Europe and North America,while exploiting new growth opportunities in China.

R100-MILLION INVESTMENT TOBOOST GAUTENGECONOMY ANDJOB CREATION

A new R100-million investment in training andskills development in the vehicle manufacturingindustry is a vital injection in the economy ofGauteng, says Ms Amanda Nair, the Chief Executive Officer of Blue IQ. A world-classSupplier Incubation Facility (SIF) has been established in Pretoria as a joint initiative be-tween the Gauteng Provincial Government andthe Ford Motor Company of Southern Africa.Blue IQ, the agency responsible for flagshipprojects such as the Gautrain, Newtown andthe Nelson Mandela Bridge, facilitated the newtraining facility at Ford’s assembly site in Silver-ton. The Gauteng Government has committedR50-million for the construction of the facilityand an additional R15-million for start-up costsfor BBBEE companies. A further R32-millionis allocated for training and development pro-grammes at the assembly plant. The SIF will beattached to the Ford Motor Company’s produc-tion facility following its recent R3-billion investment to produce the T6 next-generationcompact pick-up truck. An Economic ImpactReport recently concluded that Ford’s T6 Model will contribute R79-billion to theGauteng economy over the next 15 years andcreate almost 700 000 direct and indirect employment opportunities.

Volvo's three-point safety belt at the Smithsonian

A u g u s t 2 0 1 026

AAMA SALUTES, AND CREATES, NEW INITIATIVES

A L E R T

AAMA is all for new initiatives, and when it sees fit or the opportunity arises it is notaverse to being part of the process, in creating some initiatives of its own. Thisshould not be seen as something unusual, because AAMA was created to serve theunique interests of automotive aftermarket manufacturers, in four specific areas.

The four specific areas ofAAMA activity encompass:• Strategic input to government on issues of concern for

the local aftermarket industry, specifically around qual-ity standards and the enforcement thereof

• Training and skills development, working with otherindustry bodies and government institutions to achievethe required level of competence for the automotiveaftermarket industry

• The education of the industry and the consumer of theimportance of fitting branded quality automotive parts,with particular focus on the crucial areas of vehicleroadworthiness, safety, environmental awareness andconsumer protection

• An emphasis on supply chain sustainability, coveringlogistics, commodity pricing and customs and excisecapability

It is on the subject of educating the wholesalers, retailers and fit-

ters that AAMA has been the most proactive. The formation of

AAMA came about in November 2008 precisely because of the

activities of the vehicle known as Partinform, which had evolved

over the years as a means to educate and inform. Partinform’s

beginnings can be traced back to 1986, when the Partinform

Component Manufacturers Association was conceived, with the

purpose of holding trade evenings around the country.

This loose arrangement was formalised when AAMA came into

being as a registered association known as the Automotive

Aftermarket Manufacturers Association, and Partinform was

retained as the public face of AAMA, and continued to evolve

as a means to educate, inform, and update the sharp end of the

automotive aftermarket, i.e. the distribution and repair side that

interfaces with the final consumer, a.k.a. the motorist.

This evolution continues in a trailblazing initiative of taking

Partinform across the seas. The Automechanika Frankfurt in

September is always a well attended event and a form of

bi-annual pilgrimage for many in the South African automotive

aftermarket fraternity, and thus presents an ideal opportunity

for Partinform to create a forum for a bit of South African hospi-

tality for these temporary expatriates. The Partinform Automotive

Trade Show is held eight times a year in our neck of the woods,

but for the first time ever it is going across the seas in a revamped

networking guise for the benefit of those who are visiting Europe’s

premier auto parts show. This will be an opportunity for the

buyers and executives to mingle with dignitaries from across the

globe, in the form of high ranking government officials, embassy

personnel, colleagues and executives from multinationals.

For more information on this event, please read the next page.

Good News Travels Well

A u g u s t 2 0 1 028

MEGAN NAIKER

Q: Have you got shocks for all makesand models.

Yes. Tenneco Inc. offers a comprehensive

range of European, Asian and American

applications. MONROE is the interna-

tional leading brand and our aim is to grow

marketshare within Southern Africa. Our

local plant in PE has been manufacturing

shock absorbers in South Africa for more

than 48 years. We have 80 manufacturing

facilities worldwide, supplying OE manu-

facturers and replacement market cus-

tomers. In fact, at Tenneco Inc, our

strength is research and development and

also good after-sales service. We consider

ourselves the solution provider. This is

paramount to our success.

Q: Other products?

Although Tenneco’s main product abroad

is exhaust management products and

systems, locally our core product is MON-

ROE shock absorbers. Our focus is to

promote MONROE for passenger, light

commercial and heavy commercial

vehicles. Overseas the company also

supplies shock absorbers to the two and

three-wheeler market. Our exclusive range

incorporates RANCHO Shocks and

suspension parts, mainly for American

vehicles – particularly off-road.

Q: How did you get into the shockabsorber business?

After school I spent 3yrs studying comput-

ers. This was something I wanted to do all

my life at school. Thereafter whilst at my

1st job with Fascor, I studied further 2yrs

International Trade and Export. Then with

the export experience I joined T&N

Friction Products for three years, handling

automotive components and shock

absorbers into Africa.

Q: Exporting to Africa and all overthe world requires skills learned onlyby experience?

It’s complicated and challenging. Every

country has its own regulations, which you

have to know, and the patience to make the

flow of goods run smoothly. This process is

specialised and only comes with experience

gained. You can’t learn it out of a book.

Q: Did you stay there?

No. Later I joined Telaflo Manufacturing,

exporting shocks and other automotive

components into Europe, Africa and

Eastern countries. We also supported the

local fitment centres, garages and work-

shops with shock absorbers.

Q: When did you join Monroe(Tenneco) ?

Nine years ago I joined Tenneco as the

Business Development Manager, and was

later appointed the Aftermarket Country

Manager for Southern Africa. The chal-

lenge was to change the brand from

Armstrong to MONROE. The single

brand strategy was rolled out about 3 years

ago, and I’m proud to announce that as a

team effort between the plant and sales

force, this strategy measured a huge success

in South Africa. MONROE was finally

accepted by the aftermarket trade cus-

tomers. Although a grudge purchase, we

have made some good progress in shock

absorber awareness and sales penetration.

Q: Has Monroe been into Motorsportat all?

Absolutely, we have been present and suc-

cessful in the World Touring Car

Championship (WTCC). Locally, we

sponsor some 4x4 events in the Western

Cape.

Q: Where did you go to school?

I am a Durban boy and went to Strelitzia

Secondary School – Isipingo.

Q: Married?

Yes – for 16 years to Chameli. We have

also got two girls – Arya, the eldest (11), is

still deciding what she wants to do but our

youngest, Pia (8), wants to be a singer.

Q: Do you have a mentor in life?

Yes – the late Norman Naidoo, the Export

Manager of Fascor, who guided me in my

career path, and also to stick to the

principles in life. I also highly respect

the late Norman Bird – owner Telaflo

Manufacturing, for being a father figure

and offering me the opportunities in life.

Q: What else to you want to achieve inlife?

I haven’t really thought about it as I am so

wrapped up in company affairs and my

job.

Q: Hobbies?

None really. I am totally involved with the

family over weekends. My hobby is my

work and I just love to travel, meet people

and visit different markets to identify new

business opportunities.

P e r s o n a l p r o f i l e

by Roger McCleery

Q & ATenneco’s Aftermarket Country Manager for Southern Africa

One of the most important safety critical items overworked and forgotten on your vehicles are shock absorbers. Monroe shock absorbers (nee Armstrong), part of TennecoInc of the USA, are manufactured at their plant in PE. They are supplied as original equipment to motor manufacturers, here and all over the world. Responsible for increas-ing their share of the local aftermarket and export business is a well travelled motorman, Megan Naiker (39), who is their Aftermarket Country Manager for Southern Africa.

Parliament learnt of a few sketchy details regarding compulsorymotor vehicle insurance, currently in the early stage of planning bythe National Department of Transport (NDOT). The plan would evidently add to the existing personal damages cover offered by theRoad Accident Fund (RAF), which requires the fund to stand in the

shoes of wrong-doers when road traffic accidents cause injury, death or loss ofincome. The proposed insurance scheme would cover damage to property, such asother parties’ vehicles, goods and fixed property.

A u t o T o p i c a l

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

The detail of the cover envisaged and its cost were

not available at the parliamentary briefing, nor

were there any firm suggestions on how

premiums would be gathered. Who will pay is

yet another question. Vehicle owners? Vehicle

drivers? Neither is it clear which of these would

be indemnified in terms of the scheme. Accepting that the plan is

probably at its very early conceptual stages, perhaps a look at the

dimensions of the problem to be solved might be in order. The

parameters certainly run far beyond the fact that only 30 to 35%

of South Africa’s road vehicles appear to carry any kind of

insurance. The size of the uninsured problem becomes apparent

when this approximate proportion is applied to the end 2009

vehicle population, which included 5.41 million motorcars,

1.95 million LDV’s and2.23 million other vehicles.

Estimates vary, but approximately 30% of light vehicles and

almost all heavier vehicles on the local roads are thought to belong

to corporate bodies. These tend to be concentrated into the

younger end of the vehicle age spectrum, and many are financed

by banks, the latter requiring insurance cover by law.

Thus the upper estimate of insurance penetration would yield

around 5% of vehicles covered belonging to households.

The remaining 65% also belong to households.

The accompanying graphics throw some dimensional light on how

households spent their money on certain motor related expenditures

at the time of the research which produced the 2005/6 spending

estimates upon which the 2008 consumer price index is based.

Statistics SA provides data segmented into five equal sized groups of

households, or quintiles, each of which contains approximately

2.4 million households. We have taken the data and transformed it

into Rand spend estimated from the original data for each

household group, and then analysed this spending.

by Tony Twine

Compulsory Car Insurance– Don’t Hold Your Breath!

30

A u t o T o p i c a l

31A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

The bar chart reflects the ratios of spending on new and used

vehicles, petrol and insurance by each group. According to the

original data, the very low, low and medium household spending

groups effectively spent nothing at all on transport insurance.

The high income group spent 0.1% of its total household

spending on transport insurance that year, while the very high

income group spent 0.73% of its total spending.

The ratio of spending on insurance to spending on vehicles,

contributed almost entirely by the very high income group, is

0.4. Household spend considerably more on fuel in a year than

they spend on vehicles, so the ratio of insurance to fuel spending is

even lower than this, at 0.14.

The triple pie chart shows the splits of spending across each of the

three items, designated by each of the household quintiles.

The lowest three household quintiles spend money on fuel, but

relatively little money on vehicles, and absolutely no money on

insurance. The fuel spending indicates these household groups

share of road usage, so the pie charts make it clear that, despite

significant road usage share, the lowest three household expendi-

ture groups contribute nothing to the insurance premium pot.

While the values of vehicles in the household quintiles are quite

low, the insurance risk is not so much those vehicles themselves,

but what they might destroy or damage. The problem is not

insuring the R20 000 skedonk, but the damages to the Porsche

that it may write off.

The proposal sounds good, but has a long way to go through its

planning stages, and may not be significant when it arrives.

SKF has extended its range of OE-qualityuniversal boot kits by unveiling a brand-newkit that has been specifically developed forlight commercial vehicles. As a precision partssupplier with a product portfolio that hasbeen shaped by the needs of today's vehicle technicians, SKF is fully aware of theneed to supply a universal boot kit that guar-antees a fast and flexible repair every time.Each kit contains: · 1 universal boot · 1 longclamp · 1 short clamp · 2 x 90 gr. bags ofgrease. Its latest universal boot kit (VKJP01003) is available as a single pack and thecut-to-fit boot is suitable for all current lightcommercial vehicle CV Joint dimensions,ranging from 75mm to 145mm. Each boot ismanufactured using high-quality stretchy

rubber compound making the boot extreme-ly wear-resistant. Each boot features 2 differ-ent diameters on the 'shaft side and five different diameters on the CV-Joint side toguarantee a tight fit which means increasedwater-resistance. To ensure the metal clampscan be safely fastened onto the boot there arealso non-skid ridges between each flat rim.The light commercial vehicle universal bootcan be fitted quickly and easily with cones orair-operated fitting tools and the CV Jointdoes not need to be removed from the 'shaftduring the repair process.

SKF launches a universal boot kit for light commercial vehicles

For more information about SKF's brand-new universal boot kit for light commercial vehicles or any other product in its ever-expanding aftermarket range,please contact your local representative or visit www.vsm.skf.com

by Eugene Herbert

I n t e l l i - D r i v i n g

A u g u s t 2 0 1 032

S o m e q u e s t i o n s o n r o a d r a g e

If you’ve done any of these, you suffer from road rage! Advice: Cool it.

"Believe it or not, if you answered yes to ANY of these questions, you could be labelled at leastpotentially an aggressive driver." If you've been guilty of one’s we haven’t mentioned well then

most drivers wouldn’t want to share the road with you – get help, fast !!!

Road Rage comes from natural aggression, or a natural reaction toaggression. The intelligent driver steers well clear of both. Try theseto ascertain your state of mind.

Aggro, Ergo Aggro

1. Have you ever run someone off the road?2. Have you ever angrily chased another driver?3. Have you intentionally slowed down or slammed on your brakes when someone tailgated you?4. Have you ever purposely cut off another car?5. Have you ever yelled out the window at another driver for any reason?

W h a t h a v e y o u d o n e t o p r o v o k e r o a d r a g e ? ? ?

1. Have you ever changed lanes without checking your mirrors and/or using your indicators?2. Have you ever driven slowly in the overtaking lane and held up traffic?3. Have you ever daydreamed while driving?4. Have you ever stolen a gap in traffic that caused another driver to slam on their brakes?5. Have you ever, when encountering an intersection with a non-functioning traffic light, simply followed the car in front

of you without pausing, instead of treating it as a four-way stop?

I n t e l l i - D r i v i n g

33A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

A few issues back, I wrote about the globalisation of the domestic Chinese motor indus-try. My conclusion was that the main thrust of this event still lies in the future,although it remains a matter of intense focus for the more established manufacturers ofvehicles based in America, Europe and other Asian countries. This month, I am shifting thespotlight to that other burgeoning centre of automotive production, India. There are several substantial differences between the historic and currently prevailing situationsin India and China, and this has led to the emergence of a very different globalisationprofile for their motor industries. Without repeating too much of the previous article, itis instructive to consider these differences, and to ponder on the future direction ofIndia’s role as a major player in the global automotive sector.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 034

Unlike China, where vehicle ownership is a relativelynew opportunity for much of its population, and thevehicle market has grown exponentially off an initialvery low base, India has had a lengthy history of

private vehicle ownership and vehicle manufacture. During the1950’s and 60’s, Indian operations were set up to build the MorrisOxfords, Fiat 1100’s, Bedford TJ trucks, Willys Jeeps and LeylandBuses that had proved suitable for the extremely congested roadand traffic conditions, echoing, to a great extent, the country’shistoric ties with Great Britain. Subsequently, influences fromGermany and Japan also made their mark, resulting in local factories being set up by Tata and Maruti, for licensed manufac-ture of Mercedes-Benz commercial vehicles and Suzuki minicars.During the period before economic liberalisation in 1991, theIndian government, through protective legislation, effectively“froze” the technology of domestically-produced vehicles at mid-20th Century levels, keeping individual models in production long after they had been discontinued at origin.

In the decade up to 2001, the original three Indian-owned manufacturers, Hindustan Motors, Premier Automobiles andMaruti Udyog, experienced mixed fortunes in dealing with theflood of global manufacturers that established firm footholds inIndia. The almost quaint Hindustan Ambassador, by then combining an early-fifties Morris design with a slightly youngergeneration Isuzu engine, continued to survive thanks to consider-able patronage from the government and taxi operators, but theFiat-inspired Premier Padmini could only manage less than 200unit sales during the whole of 1999. Maruti, on the other hand,still enjoyed 60% of the market with its Suzuki-derived products,dominating the small car segment with sales around 150 000units per annum. Domestic Indian truck manufacturer Tata alsoentered the car market during that period with its Indica, a product independent of foreign influence.

Jumping ahead to 2003/4, we find the domestic Indian marketfor cars and trucks standing at nearly 1,2 million units, althoughthis was completely overshadowed by the massive contemporarydemand for motorcycles and three-wheelers, which totalled morethan 5½ million units! By the 2009/10 fiscal year, the numbershad increased to 2,5 million four-wheelers and just less than

10 million bike-derived units respectively. The total number ofmanufacturers building vehicles in India had also increased substantially, with eleven local firms being joined by fourteen“foreign” brands, and total domestic production at 2,6 millionunits.

Returning to the China-India comparison, it was noted in the earlier article that Chinese automakers have yet to become a majorglobal force in exporting their products to established markets inEurope and North America, while concentrating their currentefforts in exploiting the sustained growth within their owndomestic situation, and developing exports initially to emergingmarkets in Asia and overseas. The Indian “domestics”, however,have been more willing to engage internationally. Tata’s much-publicised recent purchase of Jaguar and Land Rover from Ford is clearly the best example of this, and the development of apresently fairly low-key alliance with Fiat (now also controllingChrysler) has enormous geographic and business potential.Tractor and SUV specialist Mahindra and Mahindra is busy setting up light truck distribution in the United States as you readthese words, and the company also has a developing relationshipwith American truck and engine specialist Navistar Internationalwith much potential for growth. There is ample evidence ofIndian-manufactured product already being fed into the globalnetworks of MAN, Honda, Renault, Suzuki and Ford, and the co-operative export of vehicles and components can be expectedto expand fairly rapidly in the not too distant future.

At home, Tata is working hard to convert that huge demand formotorcycles into sales of its unique entry-level Nano minicar. If the Indian industrial giant is even moderately successful, thedynamics of the total market for motorised personal transportcould shift enormously, and may even, in time, threaten China’snewly-won World Number One ranking above the ten millionunit per annum barrier. India is working hard to develop andimprove its road infrastructure, and this is already influencing thepattern of truck sales away from the traditionally horrendously-overloaded four-wheelers into greater demand for larger, multi-axled units. On the passenger front, better roads will resultin more demand for bigger, faster and more sophisticated cars.After all, Sashin Tendulkar is already a Ferrari owner!

F r a n k l y S p e a k i n g

by Frank Beeton

Chery, the leading independent automotive brand in China and thatcountry’s biggest vehicle exporter, is going places, and making animpact on the global automotive stage. Chery understands that invest-

ment in new technologies is vital for growth and sustainability, and it also realisesthat the companies that stay ahead of the technology curve will be the leaders in thedevelopment stakes.

To this end, Chery will invest R2.5 billion in research and

development (R&D) in 2010. This is equivalent to 4.4%

of the company’s total annual revenue and is a strong

indicator of Chery’s commitment to increasing its sales to at least

700 000 units this year with a stretched target of 900 000 vehicles.

The company’s 2010 action plan, known as the Intensive

Cultivation 2009 Project spells out how Chery will develop tradi-

tional and new energy technologies simultaneously. The company

plans to develop two lines of products simultaneously – one using

conventional power sources and the other using new energy

technologies. The main focus will be on increasing vehicle and

component test capacity as well as achieving breakthroughs in core

technology areas such as engine and automatic transmission

development, while accelerating the rate of progress in the indus-

trialisation and marketability of new energy technologies.

Major projects include the construction of the largest automotive

test facility in Asia. Building of the technical centre is already

under way in Wuhu, where Chery’s headquarters are located.

When complete it will be staffed by 15 000 professional R&D

personnel. The facility will include 50 000 hectare for trial manu-

facturing factories, 7 000m2 of test and analysis centre and

5 000m2 for the design centre.

The laboratory will operate in six sections – components, power

train, energy saving and the environment, noise/vibration/

harshness (NVH) and vehicle and occupant safety. There will also

be facilities for electromagnetic compatibility testing, material

testing and an advanced measurement capability. Chery chairman,

Yin Tongyue says the company will use the new facilities to “open

a green passage” in terms of developing core technologies and

enhancing product quality, thus enhancing the relatively new

motor company’s overall ability on an international scale. A major

focus will be on obtaining a balance between quality and cost.

In terms of engine development the company has already intro-

duce a new generation continuously variable valve timing (CVVT)

engine and continuously variable transmission (CVT) on the

Riich G3, launched in May 2010. This is a mid and high end

compact sedan with three engine options – 1,6, 1.8 and 2.0 litres

- which are all new generation power units. Its CVT is the first to

be offered by an independent Chinese motor manufacturer in a

production car. A total of nine new Chery engines will be

introduced this year – including petrol and diesel variants – and

will incorporate variable valve timing, direct fuel injection,

supercharging and other advanced technologies.

Attention is also being given to new power technologies – strong

hybrid (ISG), plug-in hybrid (PHEV) and a pure electric vehicle

(EV). Six models of strong hybrids, plug-in electric vehicles and

pure electric vehicles will be launched in 2010 to showcase Chery’s

ability to put advanced technologies into production and offer

them for sale to the public.

Chery represents the new

wave in technology and

global presence, and South

Africa will be an impor-

tant pioneering market

for the new generation

of vehicles.

A series of articles on the rise of the Chery automobile

by Howard Keeg

A u g u s t 2 0 1 036

Chery to Invest R2.5 Billionon Research and Development

A u g u s t 2 0 1 038

The Automobile Association of South Africa (AA) has been the motorists’friend since its formation in 1930. The AA has a storied history of champi-oning the needs of the motoring public for 80 years, and it is constantlyevolving. In fact, the acronym AA in this instance could mean many things,such as Actively Assisting, Always Available, and many more come to mind.

ABR is always willing to give credit where credit is due,

and as the official mouthpiece of AAMA and under its

editorial brief, we are also on the lookout for good news

stories on training. On this mission, we found our way

to the AA Training Academy in Midrand, Gauteng, which was

founded in 2006. More on this later.

Today the AA offers its members roadside assistance, technical

advice, motor-related legal advice, finance and insurance, driver

training, and even exclusive travel packages and travel advice.

Derek Hall-Jones, Divisional Manager, AA Technical Services,

puts it succinctly, “The AA’s corporate strategy is predicated on

the consumer, and part of our promise is to enhance the consumer

experience from the retail point of view”. With the modern motor

vehicle becoming increasingly sophisticated, particularly from the

technical aspect, it was a logical move and only a matter of time

that the AA would get involved in technical training. The profi-

cient maintenance of a motor vehicle has become critically impor-

tant for motorists, and thus is rich territory for a consumer orien-

tated organisation such as the AA. The inevitable happened in

2006 with the official opening of the AA Technical Training

Academy in Gauteng, to be followed up in 2007 with a satellite

campus in Cape Town. “When it comes to technical training, the

AA has a significant role to play. Part of the process of assisting

consumers was the implementation of high quality levels of train-

ing services to the retail motor industry”, Hall-Jones explains.

The Academy caters specifically for the OEM and retail motor

industries technical training needs, with merSETA accreditation

for the various technical qualifications, which allows for compa-

nies to claim training grants for apprentices and learners, and to

offset a portion of their taxes. Apprenticeship and learnership pro-

grammes for motor mechanic, auto electrician, diesel mechanic

and automotive engine fitter are offered by an accredited decen-

tralised merSETA training centre, thus providing a one stop busi-

ness solution for those with these business needs.

ABR shall revisit this subject in future issues, with further infor-

mation on this laudable training initiative.

Werner Wandrey, Academy National Training Manager, and Derek Hall-Jones, Divisional Manager, AA Technical Services,

at the well-quipped Gauteng campus.

The origins of the AA can be traced back to 29 June 1905, when a group of motoring enthusiasts met at the Trocadero

restaurant in the West End of London, to form an association to help motorists avoid police speed traps (we trust that

the strongest drink consumed was coffee). This was the start of a culture of consumer activism, which is still relevant

over a century after the inauguration of the AA. From these worthy beginnings, various AA’s sprung up around the

world, including the Automobile Association of South Africa. Even the Fédération Internationale de l’Automobile

(FIA) traces its roots back to the AA.

The Motorist’s Friend

Even before the dust started settling over the 10 World Cup Soccerstadium pitches, and while Paul the Psychotic Squid was still makingwell muscled predictions on winners and losers, the deeply unintelli-gent began musing on whether South Africa had shown a profit fromhosting the FIFA World Cup Tournament, or not. The definition of a

cynic sprang readily to mind, namely someone who knows the price of everything andthe value of nothing.

While the tournament

was still on, it was cer-

tainly premature to

ask that kind of ques-

tion. Gamblers advise

us never to count our money while we are

still sitting at the table, clearly because it is

quite possible to either win or lose even

more while you are still in the game. Now,

for weeks and months after the tournament

is over, the auditor’s traditional question

will still haunt those trying to assay the

financial result of the tournament, “how

big do you want the profit to be?”

The first problem in making the estimate

is that there are no reliable or even vaguely

auditable figures regarding receipts, and

nobody really knows what the value of

current expenditures really amounted to,

let alone what portions might have been

absorbed by the production costs of the

tournament, and what portions should be

capitalised because of the additional fixed

capital stock which survived beyond the

final whistle.

Even President Jacob Zuma teetered on

the brink of the accounting and economic

abyss in the days leading up to the final

match, citing a government spend of

R33bn on infrastructure. But he did have

the good grace not to attribute all of this as

an expense to the tournament, referring to

improved roads, airports and rail services.

An earlier figure purporting to reflect the

costs of staging the tournament outside of

the infrastructure spend, of R12 billion

seems to rather neatly (perhaps too neatly!)

dovetail with another figure doing the

rounds of the total cost of the tournament,

including infrastructure spend, being

R45bn.

Of equal uncertain pedigree, a revenue

figure (although we are not sure about the

recipients of the alleged revenue and what

it paid for) of R48bn up to the semi-final

stage of the tournament, came floating out

of the ether. So you see, there must have

been a profit!

From an accounting and auditing point of

view, we will probably never have a single

reliable answer to the question of whether

there was a profit or loss associated with

staging Soccer World Cup 2010 in South

Africa. Economists all point to the,

virtually immeasurable gains made avail-

able by the festival, especially if it is viewed

as a process, rather than as an event.

Compare the total costs of the tourna-

ment, irrespective of who carried them, to

the costs of building a railway line between

two distant points, or laying an undersea

cable. An investor would not expect to hit

break-even a day, week, month or year

after the installation was completed, but if

future revenues exceeded the capital and

running costs, the project would be

deemed to be economically profitable.

Once again ignoring the residual value of

the sunk infrastructural investment after

the tournament, which is a massive

fraction of its original cost, we should look

at the potential economic returns from the

marketing investment that South Africa

Inc has made since it began bidding

(originally for the 2006 tournament) back

in 1998. Just take world TV viewership as

a starting point of the exposure. For weeks

ahead of the 31 day duration of the

Tournament, TV stations began preparing

their viewers for the world’s greatest show

in South Africa.

Then, during the tournament itself, four

billion TV viewers around the world were

fed a constant diet of coverage of the

football, the locations, the people and the

amenities of the host country. No amount

of money can buy 120 billion potential

individual viewing opportunities. Add to

that Radio, hard copy and electronic

media exposure, and the marketing

exposure suddenly looks like a zeppelin

compared to the peanut sized costs, even if

the costs were underestimated tenfold.

Like the railway or the undersea cable, the

marketing exposure must now be milked

for years to come. That involves protect-

ing the image and using it to promote real

value to be provided by South African

producers. Goodwill, warm glows and

fuzzy feelings create environments for sell-

ing, but we still have to go out and sell –

oh, we had better make something to sell

as well.

T o n y ’ s T a k e

A u g u s t 2 0 1 040

by Tony Twine,Senior Economist,Director –Econometrix (Pty) Ltd

How BIG do youwant the profit to be??

W h a t ’ s t h e B u z z ?

INTERNATIONAL BATTERY TECH-NOLOGY OF THE FUTURE

For owners of diesel vehicles, SUVs, caravans,boats and classic cars, replacing batteries canbecome a regular hassle and expense. BatteryCentre has the solution – the spill proof RayliteUltimate with AGM Technology. This revolution-ary battery technology has been specially developedfor Stop/Start vehicles of the future. And it’s avail-able today to South African vehicle owners. RayliteUltimate was designed and is manufactured inSouth Africa for distribution by Battery Centre tomeet the specifications of German luxury motor

vehicle manufacturers and to service the low emission Stop/Start vehicle technology of the future.Stop/Start vehicle technology conserves energy by shutting off the engine when the vehicle is stoppedin traffic, and automatically re-starts when the driver pushes the clutch. The batteries used in thesevehicles need to be robust and able to withstand high demands, not only of restarting the engine withregularity but also to power lights, electronics and air-conditioner while the engine is switched off.The Raylite Ultimate has three times the cycle life compared to a conventional battery and is betterequipped to cope with the heavy demands of vehicles such as SUVs, boats, caravans and classic carsor any vehicle with a diesel engine. The Raylite Ultimate offers a significantly increased service life.

FORD SOUTHAFRICA WELCOMESNEW VICE PRESI-DENT MARKETING,SALES AND SERVICEFord Motor Company of SouthernAfrica (FMCSA) has appointedDean Stoneley as its new VicePresident Marketing, Sales andService effective from July 2010.Stoneley replaces Jacques Brent whohas accepted a position as ExecutiveMarketing Director for Ford AsiaPacific and Africa, based inShanghai. “It is with great sadness that we say farewell to Jacques. While it is a loss to us he is facedwith a fantastic and challenging opportunity and we wish him the best of luck and every success in hisfuture endeavors,” says Jeffery Nemeth, president and CEO, Ford Motor Company of Southern Africa.“We are however extremely pleased and privileged to welcome Dean to the team. He brings with him awealth of experience and we wish him every success in his new role”.

Dean Stoneley Jacques Brent

41A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

Japanese trucks have been present in the South African market since theNineteen-Sixties, and have grown their presence to regularly take around40% of all available sales above 3 500 kg Gross Vehicle Mass. They areparticularly popular in the distribution sector, where trucks and vans

move a huge variety of consumer goods between factories, warehouses and retail outlets.They are also widely used by the Public Sector, and its outsourced service providers, toservice infrastructure, in the form of refuse compactors, vacuum tankers, removable con-tainer carriers, and the “cherry pickers” that (sometimes) come to repair the defectivestreet lights in our suburbs.

w e i g h t y i s s u e s

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

At the top end of the market,however, Japanese trucks arenot as prominent as their com-petitors from European andNorth American manufactur-

ers. In the Extra Heavy Commercial Vehiclesegment of the market, covering vehicleswith GVM ratings over 16 500 kg, thecombined Japanese market share is justbelow 20%, and fully half of that is takenby the company formerly known as NissanDiesel, and now morphing into UD TrucksSouth Africa. This anomaly is not new inthe local market, and it is interesting toponder on the reasons why Japanese brands,so well received elsewhere, have failed tomake a deeper impression at the top end of the spectrum, and particularly in the premium truck-tractor category, wheretheir combined market penetration is onlyaround 10%.

It all started back in the 1970’s when thevice-like grip that had been previouslyexerted by the South African Railways onlong distance transport started showingearly signs of loosening. At that time, theJapanese brands were becoming really serious local players, and their concession-aires started looking for ways to exploit thegrowing market for premium trucks. Mostprivate operators moving into long-distancehaulage followed the example of the SAR’sRoad Motor Transport division in choosingAmerican vehicles, usually powered by Cummins’ excellent 6-in-line NH-Seriesturbocharged diesels, coupled to Fullerrange-change multispeed constant-meshtransmissions and Rockwell single-reduc-tion drive axles. In contrast, the flagshipmodels of the Japanese brands (usually of4x2 configuration) closely conformed totheir home market preferences, using verylarge displacement, naturally aspiratedengines, with cylinders usually in a vee-configuration, coupled to five-speed syn-chromesh gearboxes and two-speed single-drive rear axles.

Apart from being deficient in terms of out-right drawing capacity, these units’ natural-ly aspirated diesels lost around 20% of theirpower at higher altitudes, and requireddetuning to avoid excessive smoke emis-sions. Thus, they did not really offer aviable alternative to the Internationals, FordLouisvilles and Macks that abounded onSouth Africa’s roads at that time. Many ofthese obstacles were overcome with theadvent of truck local content programmes during the ‘Eighties, whicheffectively removed Cummins diesels fromthe local market, and made available state-of-the-art European engines andtransmissions, locally manufactured byAtlantis Diesel Engines and ASTAS, to theJapanese brands. Nissan Diesel and Hinotook advantage, and made inroads into thelonghaul sector, while Isuzu, after showingearly interest, decided to drop its “C & ESeries” models altogether and concentrateon its lighter products. Fuso, sold in SouthAfrica with Mitsubishi branding at thattime, made some unpopular engine choices,and eventually exited the local market seg-ments above the MCV category.

As South Africa moved into the ‘Nineties, itsoon became clear that locally-manufac-tured truck major driveline componentrywas not cost-effective, and the politically-motivated justification for its existence wasremoved. The market, now conditioned bya decade of European dominance, welcomed back the likes of Volvo andScania, and soon embraced the latestMercedes-Benz and MAN models that hadmoved beyond the technology previously“frozen” by the ADE experience. Americanbrands also re-entered the market, andInternational, Peterbilt and Freightlinerwere able to rekindle local operators’ previous love affair with the Cummins/Fuller/Rockwell recipe, although the trans-mission components now carried Eatonand Meritor branding, and the shoppinglist was expanded to include Detroit Dieseland Caterpillar options.

The Japanese parent companies were obviously keen to reclaim the parts businessthat they had lost under the ADE regime,and encouraged their local operations torevert to “normal” catalogue specificationswith in-house componentry. Hino re-estab-lished its “thoroughbred” product profileprogressively as new series emerged, whileIsuzu re-entered the 6x4 tractor segmentwith its Gigamax flagship in 2008.However, against the plethora of choicesnow available to operators, the Japanesetrucks were faced with the task of re-estab-lishing their market presence with “in-house” drivelines. Nissan Diesel tookon this challenge most effectively, and, aftera hesitant start with its big-engined UD430, hit the jackpot with the UD 440,which was positioned as a fully competitive,but slightly less sophisticated alternative tothe European models. This model, and itsQuon successor, have dominated all otherJapanese-sourced premium trucks in themarket, making notable inroads intoprominent national fleets.

Apart from Fuso, now re-established inSouth Africa under the Daimler banner,with its current XHCV range capped at a360 hp upper output, there is nothing obvious in the technical profiles of the latest model Japanese flagship haulers tosatisfactorily explain their cumulative lackof market performance. It is more likelythat, after decades of less than full competitiveness, the strategies, structures orcapacities to cope with typical XHCV seg-ment deals, which are often done in tens, ifnot hundreds, of units, and can generateequal numbers of high-value trade-ins, have eluded franchise and dealer managements.The “edge” gained by Nissan Diesel/UDreflects the intense focus placed on this endof the market by its Japanese parent, whichdirects its resources accordingly, and provides its local operation with the ammu-nition it needs for heavyweight success.

by Frank Beeton

44

Japanese Extra-Heavies

E n t r e p r e n e u r s h i p

A u g u s t 2 0 1 046

How to Build a SevenMillion Rand BusinessYou might look around you and ask why anyone would start a newenterprise at this point in time. Economies around the world have beenbattered by a prolonged downturn, and many commentators fear thatthe worst is yet to come.

South Africa has been buoyed to

some extent by the World Cup and

the related infrastructure invest-

ment. But even so, the country has

been infected by the bad economic news

from around the world and the ongoing

sense of gloom and doom. But I’m going to

argue that there could be no better to time

for an entrepreneur to start a new business.

The truth is that despite the hiccups we’ve

experienced in recent years, the country is

richer than it ever was before after an

unprecedented spurt of growth between

1995 and 2009.

Sure, you’ll look around and say that peo-

ple aren’t spending money. Rates of jobless-

ness are rising and new businesses continue

to fail at an alarming rate. In the midst of

this change and chaos, however, are many

opportunities for smart entrepreneurs to

build businesses worth a million Rand or

more a year.

Sell what they wantMany people still have some money in

their bank accounts, but they are holding

on to it. The reason that some people are

not spending money is because no one is

selling them something that they really

want to buy – something that seldom

occurs to business people and economists.

If people don’t see a compelling reason to

spend, they’ll hold onto their money. But

give them what they want, and they’ll

loosen the purse strings. One just needs to

look at the South African pay-television

market for an example of this principle in

action.

A new competitor, Top-TV, has moved

into the market with a bang. By all

accounts, its installers and resellers are

struggling to keep up with demand for

what is a non-essential product that is

aimed at the entry-level market.

The business it is winning comes from

people wanting to spend some money on a

pay-TV service, but they’re either not

happy with what they’re currently getting

from the incumbent or never liked its offer-

ing enough to sign up in the first place.

Sure, the pay-TV market has barriers to

entry in the form of regulations that have

limited competition, so there’s pent-up

demand for choice, so let’s consider anoth-

er example from international business.

Clamouring for choiceThink about the Apple iPad and its

massively successful launch into the market

– or the Amazon Kindle or the new

computer category, the netbook.

These products have all enjoyed significant

success in a computer hardware environ-

ment where consumers and businesses no

longer routinely upgrade PCs every two

to three years. They won’t buy a new

computer for its own sake.

But give them something they really want,

though they never knew they wanted it

before, and they’ll pre-order months in

advance or queue around the block to buy

it. I believe there are many markets in

South Africa where people are clamouring

for choice.

This is becoming especially important in a

connected, globalised world where people

have a wealth of product and service infor-

mation at their fingertips. Via television

and the Internet, South Africans know not

only what various companies here have on

offer, but also what consumers in the rest of

the world are enjoying.

Companies that can give people what they

want will be the winners in this world.

Of course, understanding what people

want and accessing the funds to develop is

the hard part.

That’s the role that business accelerator

support firms have to play in the market.

Business accelerators are companies that

offer support and assistance in launching

and growing a start-up or early-stage

business.

Accelerating growthWhereas traditional venture capitalists offer

only funding, business accelerators also

offer business support. This might be

something as mundane as assistance with

back-office administration, but usually

extends to strategic support. Small busi-

nesses are often established by someone

who is a superb technician, but who lacks

expertise in operations, finance, sales and

marketing. Business accelerators can help

them to understand which ideas are

commercially viable, develop a strategy to

turn these ideas into products and then

market them effectively.

All too many entrepreneurs are coming to

market with the same old products and

services that no one wants. They have good

ideas and sound skills, but they need help

turn these into great businesses. The

important thing to remember is that there

is free money in consumers’ pockets. Learn

how to give them what they want and

you’re on your way to becoming a million

Rand, or even million dollar, business.

By Pavlo Phitidis,CEO at Aurik

Business Incubator

In the previous issue of ABR we discussed the confusion in the marketplace aroundthe quality of automotive parts, and the misconceptions about what is good and badquality, particularly when it comes to automotive glass. Hopefully our detailed article spelling out the facts puts the argument to rest. In this issue, we address the misconceptions that the layman, i.e. the man in the street, has over the word“shatterproof”.

Giel Steyn

D i a m o n d D i a l o g u e s

EditorialPartnership

A u t o m o t i v e G l a s sTransparent Facts – for the Layman

A u g u s t 2 0 1 048

In this series of articles ABR discusses with Giel Steyn of Grandmark International the four significant factors that should be taken intoaccount when purchasing automotive parts - Technology, Quality, Safety and Value for Money. These four characteristics are inter-related, andeach cannot stand on their own, and together they become a motorist's best friend. Similarly, diamonds are also judged on four characteristics,known as the “four c's” - carat, clarity, colour and cut; and of course, diamonds are a girl's best friend. Grandmark International, as a dis-tributor of automotive parts, is keenly aware of the need to source only the best in Technology, Quality, Safety and Value for Money, andtherefore it is appropriate that this series of articles is titled Diamond Dialogues.

It is not surprising that the average consumer

does not understand that shatterproof equals

laminated. Laminated is referring to the

technical process, and laminating is the term

used in the standards for automotive glass interna-

tionally. The general public has been bombarded

with advertising campaigns that focus on the high-

ly emotive expression “shatterproof”, with very lit-

tle emphasis on the more mundane “laminated”.

The truth is that shatterproof and laminated are

interchangeable. If one goes to the web and googles

shatterproof glass, the second site that comes up is

for laminated glass. And if one googles the defini-

tion of shatterproof glass, the first definition is for

safety glass. Therefore, safety glass = shatterproof

glass = laminated glass. All these terms equate to

glass that resists shattering. Technically, to create

this, requires a composite of two sheets of glass with

an intermediate layer of transparent plastic.

Early windscreens were made of ordinary window glass, which led to serious injuries in vehicle accidents.

A series of lawsuits in America (similar to what we are to experience very shortly when the Consumer

Protection Act comes into effect in October 2010) led to the development of stronger windscreens, made

from toughened glass which shattered into mostly harmless fragments when the windscreen broke. The

problem was that a single stone could shatter the screen, so in 1919 Henry Ford solved this

problem by using a new technology developed in France called glass laminating. Windscreens made using

this process were actually two layers of glass with a vinyl inner layer, which held the glass

together when it fractured. See diagram.

Today, the modern, glued-in windscreen contributes to the vehicle’s rigidity, over and above its safety role.

Practically every country now requires windscreens to stay in one piece when broken, because apart from

the shatterproof aspect a properly installed windscreen is also essential to safety, as in the case of a car rolling

the windscreen, along with the roof of the car, must provide protection to the vehicle’s occupants. Thus the need for windscreen glass

to pass certification tests, be it the SABS mark, E-mark, ECE R43, or the DOT. Responsible companies such as Grandmark

International ensure that the automotive glass that they sell has all these certifications and meet or exceed OEM specifications. Thus, if

you fit a Grandmark glass, you are assured of fitting laminated, safety or shatterproof glass, they are one and the same. Quality

Shatterproof glass is also manufactured locally by PG Glass under its Shatterprufe brand.

But, DO WE HAVE OUR ACT TOGETHER? The

answer is most probably a resounding NO! Unless you

have been incredibly lucky, and you have a dedicated

team of professionals working for you, then the odds are

pretty strong that you are not offering the service package that

you and your customers desire. And if this is the case, then we

need to pay serious attention to the key activities, and to find a

formula that works for you, works for your employees, and works

for your customers. There are many ways and methods available,

some more successful than others, to develop teams and to foster

inter-departmental co-operation. However, most of these

concepts and structures have been imported, and thus do not have

the precise cultural resonance, which means once again that they

will miss the mark. Unfortunately, no matter how well meaning

they are, the concepts will not be bought, and critically, they will

not be “owned” by the employees.

I therefore recommend the ethnic approach, i.e. make it South

African. I am not being cute, nor new age, as I can personally

vouch for the enthusiastic acceptance of this philosophy, which

we shall call the HUT system. It is an indigenous attempt to

allocate responsibility for the Key Activities, whilst encouraging

inter-departmental co-operation and promoting multi-skilling,

and crucially, a proven method to keep enthusiasm high and to

keep the focus on the customer.

THE HUT SYSTEM(Helping - Us Together)We must see our company as a cluster village, a sort of modern

day kraal. The entire village (kraal) is owned collectively by

everyone who lives there, but each hut (Key Activity Area) is the

responsibility of the person who has been allocated that hut. That

person, who in the modern conservative sense, would be the

director, manager or supervisor, together with the family of that

hut, in this case the employees designated to the specific functions

within that area of responsibility; would be responsible for

keeping the hut clean, metaphorically speaking. This would

include the area outside the hut, which is public domain.

This would be very simple to enforce if this was merely a hut in a

traditional kraal, but we are not so lucky, as we are living in the

modern world. We have to adapt our kraal to cater for the

demands of our contemporary lifestyle, and the need to survive

and prosper in a competitive environment, both locally and

globally. Therefore, without losing sight of the traditional African

values that must form the bedrock of our communal culture, we

must mutate into a high-tech hut, and contribute to the twenty-

first century African Renaissance.

In the previous two modules we identified the seven Key Activity Areas, and we accepted that Key Activity # 7 becomes Key Activity # 1 once we have got our acttogether on all the activities of the company. Now that we’ve got a good product,backed up by exceptional service, we can start to focus on the most important ingredient of marketing – CUSTOMER C.A.R.E.

– sponsored by Federal-Mogul

Customer C.A.R.E. Programme

1. Why is CUSTOMER C.A.R.E. the mostimportant ingredient in marketing?Discuss.

2. Honestly and sincerely, do you believethat your employees feel that they “own”your customers?

3. Are we being patronising by using theethnic approach? Discuss.

4. What would you see as the characteristicsof a 21st Century Renaissance?

A u g u s t 2 0 1 050

MODULE FOURTEEN:THE FORMALISATION STAGE – CONTINUED

DISCUSSION POINTS

While tyres remain the mostneglected item on any vehi-cle, but still manage to per-form their functions, they

need care to get the best out of them. Aswe have said so many times before, tyresare the only components on any vehiclewhich physically keep one in contact withthe road surface. They have to be treated asthe safety critical components they trulyare. But by taking care of them an eco-nomic reward waits for the responsiblefleet controller as well. Taking proper careof tyres involves some understanding ofthe product. Also mentioned many timesbefore is the fact that tyres are multi com-ponent products. Lack of care can result incomponents separating and total tyre fail-ure. Care does not only involve maintain-ing the pressures although this must alwaysbe a major priority. Tyre care involvesmany facets, and these include factorsapart from the actual tyres themselves.Tyre staff must be trained in all facets andunderstand the reasons behind each one.

Let’s start with tyre storage which is a con-cern at most tyre stores. The importance ofstoring tyres is dependant on the length oftime they are to be stored. If you keep asmall stock or have a high turnaround ofstock the importance of how and wherethey are stored lessens. If however youkeep large stock and movement is slow theimportance of storage position and placebecomes high priority. For this reason wewill concentrate on best practice only andleave it up to you to decide on which stor-age time situation your tyres are in. Bestpractice in storing tyres is a bigger subjectthan one would expect, but is simpler tofollow than is generally believed. First ofall a cool constant temperature is required.Moisture must be considered as a contam-inant and the storage area must be dry.Equipment such as compressors, genera-tors or anything which emits ozone mustbe kept in a completely separate area.Many tyre stores have at least the compres-sor sharing the room with the tyres. This isincorrect and those of you who have a sit-uation like this must move the compressor

immediately. Ozone contaminates tyresand they age prematurely. The tyres them-selves must never be stacked. The tyre atthe bottom of the stack will be permanent-ly deformed due to the weight above it.Even those two or three above it can getdamaged. Tyres must be stored in a posi-tion as close to their natural state as is pos-sible to achieve. Hanging them or placingupright in decently designed racks is therecommended way. Never keep tyresinflated on rims. Normally a few are keptfor emergency breakdowns, but this is abad way to store tyres so stick to theabsolute minimum breakdown require-ment.

Wheel rims were mentioned in the lastissue. We said that the workshop shouldmake sure that the rims are kept clean andfree of rust so thebead of the tyrecan seat properlyin the rim flange.They should bechecked for anybalance concernsor damage. Whilewe believe that theworkshop, in mostcases at least,should be respon-sible for the actualmaintenance ofthe rims, it is the

tyre staff who must check the rim condi-tion, and bring problem ones to the atten-tion of the workshop people. They are theonly ones who get to see the bare rims andcan accurately gauge if they need cleaningor repairs. They should also be trained onwhy rim cleanliness is important. As withmost people, if reason is not known theimportance of the action is lost. Equally, ifthey are trained what to look for, it is mostlikely the tyre staff who would be the firstto notice any irregular wear on the tyres ina fleet. Again they should then bring thisto the workshop’s notice, who are able todiagnose the cause of the wear. Valve con-dition, valve cores and valve extensionsshould be monitored and replaced whennecessary. These components result in slowleaks, premature tyre concerns and costmoney. Staff must be trained on theimportance of these small but importantmatters.

They must also know what constitutesindications of problems. They must beable to recognise that a valve core seal isaged and needs changing. The same with atubeless valve or valve/rim seal. They mustalso make sure that all valves are fitted withsteel valve caps.

We will carry on with tyre staff responsibil-ities in the next issue. Till then, think andpractice tyre safety.

www.bridgestone.co.za

52

and Their Contribution to Safety in Motoring Tyres

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

Marcus Haw

As promised last month we continue with the importance of tyre maintenance requiredto keep tyres in a safe condition and give them the best life expectancy. This monthwe will look at what the tyre staff’s responsibilities are and how they should communicate with the workshop.

When ABR interviewed partners Koos

Booysen and Andre Jonck (Andre

joined in January of this year), the

conversation was peppered with

words such as “trust”, “openness”,

“transparency”, “open cards”,

“confidence”, and “communication”. These words are testa-

ment to the philosophy of Menlyn Motor Services, and judg-

ing by the interaction between the partners and the customers

in the time ABR was there, these are not just words. Koos and

Andre emphasised that customer care is built on trust, and

that customer satisfaction is built on the assurance that the

service provider is both honest and transparent in their com-

munication. Competence is also a key ingredient, and that is

why Menlyn Motor Services applied for e-CAR membership

in 2007. e-CAR is the fastest growing workshop network in

South Africa, and this growth has come about because e-CAR

offers the support that the modern independent workshop

needs. International links, technical training, parts supply, and

marketing support equal an imposing package that is difficult

to ignore. Access to Bosch diagnostic and workshop

equipment and software, backed up by up to date training

courses at well-equipped facilities, together with the ability to

combine the marketing expertise of e-CAR’s head office

boffins and the local knowledge of the individual workshops,

makes for a business combination that is hard to beat.

Koos and Andre say that what motivates them is the fact that

the automotive aftermarket has had its fair share of rogues,

which has given the industry a bad name. Menlyn Motor

Services is working hard at dispelling this image, and with the

support of the e-CAR concept, they are doing a sterling job.

Menlyn Motor Services, situated on the busy intersection of Lois and BaliAvenues, Menlyn, has been servicing the greater community of Pretoria andbeyond since 1997. Initially in the guise of Menlyn CV Services and MenlynAutoglass, and later adding on workshop services, the secret of success hasalways been a commitment to the customer, and a relationship built on trust.

Trust is Key

To join the fastest growing workshop network in South Africa and to add a new dimension to your

business, contact Wilfried Langenbach at 086 000 3227 (086 000 ECAR)

Menlyn Motor Servicesspend their marketingallocation wisely and

proactively – this signboard at theLynnwood Primary

School makes a power-ful statement

Koos Booysen and AndreJonck are serious aboutworkshop service and

customer care.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 054

Business for SaleCalling all entrepreneurs in the

Carletonville area!

Wanting to make a break, or build a futurefor yourself and your children?

A successful automotive engineering and engine

reconditioning company, established in 1992

and going strong, has come up for sale in

Carletonville. This business is available

immediately and will be sold as a going concern

and the price includes premises, machinery and

equipment, vehicles, inventory, etc. The owner is

retiring and is prepared to sell for an extremely

reasonable R7 000 000. The financials are up to

date and available for inspection.

Phone 082 448 2846 for further information.

Wh a t ’ s t h e Buzz ?

S.A.L. 820 Wheel Balancerfrom Launch Technologies

Launch Technologies recently announced the introduction of an

improved off-car wheel balancer. This state of the art wheel bal-

ancer has a number of unique features including six different

balancing modes:

1. Std – Standard Profile: For common steel rims and

clip/adhesive weights

2. Alu-1 – for Alloy Rims: Internal/external adhesive weights

3. Alu-2 – for Alloy Rims: internal adhesive weights

4. Alu-3 – for Alloy Rims: clip weights on the inner edge and

adhesive weights on the drop centre behind the wheel flange

5. Alu-4 – for Alloy Rims: clip weight on the inner edge and

adhesive weights on the outer edge

6. Alu-5 – for Alloy Rims: clip weights on the outer edge and

adhesive weights on the inner edge

The S.A.L. 820 also includes electronic measuring via internal

and external gauges as well as a wheel optimisation programme

for wheels with a high static imbalance, of the order of 30 to

35g. This latter programme can be easily followed by carrying

out the instructions/message displayed on the VDU.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

A series of articles on the versatile FSA 720/740/754 series

R o b e r t B o s c h

The Golden Triangle – KTS, ESI[tronic], and FSA

A u g u s t 2 0 1 056

Making ContactIn the previous issue of ABR we wound up the saga of the 2004 VW Golf III 1600i thatrefused to start. Carlo du Plessis of Cencar Centurion had meticulously gonethrough the full gamut of tests. He had checked the battery, the fuses, and usingthe versatile KTS and the FSA to investigate all the aspects around the three keythings that make a petrol engine run: fuel, compression and spark.

After all this investigation, it all

came down to the switch

inside the distributor, and the

decision whether to replace

the whole distributor, or to

strip down and replace the switch, a deci-

sion based on the general condition of the

distributor and the wishes of the customer.

This was a wonderful story of sleuthing,

detective work and deduction, but as

Carlo pointed out, there was one aspect

not covered – that of the coil. The coil was

fine in this case, but now we need to look

at an example where the coil is the culprit.

To do this, Carlo looks at a 1999 VW Golf

III 1800, using the Motronic MP9.0 sys-

tem. This electronic system was in use in

the Golfs up to 2004/5, so is a popular

example of a hard starting car.

The previous case covered the testing of

the distributor and the distributor cap, and

the signals going to the ECU. In this case,

Carlo focuses his tests on the coil and the

power transistor at the coil. Carlo unplugs

the plug at the power transistor and using

a probe or the FSA multimeter he checks

for voltage on terminals 1 and 3. A voltage

of 11 to 14 is acceptable. Terminal 1 is

negative and there are various methods to

check for an open line, using the chassis or

engine, and using the battery to check for

voltage. Terminal 3 is the positive and is

linked to terminal 15, which is the

ignition terminal. Terminal 2 is the signal

from the ECU and this triggers the coil on

the negative side or Terminal 1, and plays

the traditional role of advancing or retard-

ing the timing. Now that we know that the

distributor is right and the power transistor

is right, we now focus on the coil itself. But

before we do this, a quick coil 101 for our

non-technical readers.

The coil is a simple device – essentially a

high-voltage transformer made up of two

coils of wire. One coil of wire is called the

primary coil (thick wire). Wrapped around

it is the secondary (thin wire) coil. The sec-

ondary coil normally has hundreds of

times more turns of wire than the

primary coil. Current flows from the bat-

tery through the primary winding of the

coil to charge up the coil. The primary

coil's current can be suddenly disrupted by

the breaker points, or by a solid-state

device in an electronic ignition. If you

think the coil looks like an electromagnet,

you're right – but it is also an inductor.

The key to the coil's operation is what

happens when the circuit is suddenly

broken by the points. The magnetic field

of the primary coil collapses rapidly. The

secondary coil is engulfed by a powerful

and changing magnetic field. This field

induces a current in the coils – a very high-

voltage current (up to 100,000 volts)

because of the number of coils in the

secondary winding. The secondary coil

feeds this voltage to the distributor via a

very well insulated, high-voltage coil lead.

Terminals 15 (positive) and 1 (negative)

now come into play. Using the engine as

the earth, the FSA multimeter checks for

12 volts. Then you also test the resistance

between 15 and 1 at coil, which should be

between 0,5 and 1,2 ohms. This is fine, so

now the test moves between terminals 4,

which is the high voltage side of the coil

going to the distributor, and 15, checking

for resistance. In this case, there is an open

line, which indicates damage. The progno-

sis is simple – replace the coil.

Diagram A

Power Transistor

Terminal 1

Terminal 1

Term

inal 1

5

Terminal 4

Terminal 15

57

DEKRA rates handheld Diagnostic Testers

The test criteria that Dekra used for its benchmarking exercise

were:

• Number: the number of electronic control units that the

tester recognised

• Depth: the “depth” ability, with regard to five abilities: fault

memory read/delete; identification data read out; actual

values; component activation; and testing and “coding”

• Quality: the percentage of the testers’ ability to read out 100

actual values

• Resetting a Service Indicator: the ability to interface with the

vehicle in the resetting of the maintenance service indicator

• Hardware: ease of connectibility, blue-tooth interface, multi-

plex devices, etc.

• Software: stability and ease of navigation

• Auto Scan: the provision of an automatic control

unit search

The vehicles that were used in the evaluation were:

• 2004 BMW 316i

• 2008 VW Golf 1,9TDi

• 2004 Opel Vectra 1,9 CDTi

• 2005 Ford Mondeo 2,0 D

• 2006 Fiat Punto 1,3 Multijet

• 2005 Toyota Avensis 2,0 D

• 2005 Chrysler 300C 3,5

• 2005 Hyundai Sonata V 2,4

• 2005 Mercedes A 180 CD

• 2005 Peugeot 206 1,6 HDi.

The Dekra-Diagnostic team con-

sisted of three highly qualified techni-

cians, Seydi Tezer, Martin Kraus and Günter

Gessner.

Their general prognosis was that the efficiency of the appliances

has increased noticeably, and that overall there were “no losers,

only winners”. However, after numerous hours of examining and

measuring, there was a clear winner. In the words of the testers,

“the comprehensive diagnosis test separated all participants into

three distinct groups: the top group, the middle field and the pur-

suer. In the top group the Bosch KTS 340 dominated significant-

ly, with the most inclusive data base of all the testers and didn’t

allow for a single cancellation”. They continued, “The KTS 340

completes its above average achievement through modern hard-

ware, with practical links to workshop hardware”. They do add

the caveat that it all comes at a price, but they conclude that “the

efficiency of the tester fully justifies its price”.

There is a wealth of information in this report, so we suggest that

for those in the market for a handheld diagnostic tester, to go to

our website and to do their homework.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

Every three years, DEKRA, market leader in Europe in periodic technical car and commercial vehicle testing, does comparison tests on diagnostic equipment. In 2003and 2006 Dekra focused on diagnostic stations, but in 2009 Dekra looked at handheld devices, which have become extremely popular and versatile tools in the workshop environment. ABR has managed to get access to this report, which it givesin condensed form to its readers. To view the full report, please go towww.abrbuzz.co.za and click on the DEKRA TEST button.

W o r k s h o p U p d a t e

“The most reputable, competent and

honest MB service centre and repair shop

that I am aware of!” is an unsolicited com-

ment about Hattingh Motors, which we

found on www.benzworld.org, a Mercedes-

Benz discussion forum. This comment says

it all. Hattingh Motors is an independent

automotive repair shop that specialises in

Mercedes-Benz vehicles, with siblings

André Hattingh and Ingrid Cilliers having

built up an enviable reputation over

the past 20 years. André is a mechanical

engineer and Ingrid has a B.Com in Mana-

gement Accounting, and together they

from a formidable team, with André

handling the technical side and Ingrid

looking after administration. André is a

perfectionist with a systematic approach,

whereas Ingrid loves to get her teeth into

the job, and this impressive duo can now

boast a loyal clientele base stretching from

their core constituency of Centurion,

Pretoria and Johannesburg to as far afield as

Nylstroom, Ellisras and Memel.

Hattingh Motors is a member of Capricorn

Society, having joined a few years ago when

approached by Rob Mildenhall and André

Changuion.

Initially they were sceptical, but from pre-

vious dealings they knew that they could

trust the word of André Changuion.

Hattingh Motors is now a contented mem-

ber, having experienced the advantages of

Capricorn membership. Ingrid loves the

easy management of accounts, and the sav-

ing of time and hassle in not having to fill

in separate credit application for the indi-

vidual suppliers.

The dividends and reward points are also

most welcome, and the networking oppor-

tunities and trade show at the Capricorn

year end function are ticked off as

highlights by the busy duo. André and

Ingrid express high satisfaction with the

service levels they receive from Capricorn

and what they really appreciate is the fact

that with Capricorn they have a voice.

Capricorn’s strength in numbers gives

workshops influence with suppliers

that they would not normally have.

This brother and sister team strongly

recommend Capricorn Society to all the

workshops out there who are looking for a

helping hand.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 058

I n s i g h t s

Hattingh Motors is situated in Kwartsiet Street, a stone’s throw away fromSuperSport Park in Centurion, Gauteng. This is appropriate, because whatyou get is super service.

Super Service near SuperSport Park

To join Capricorn Society Limited call André Changuionon 083 287 3498 or e-mail him at

andre.changuion@capricorn.coop or visit their website onwww.capricorn.com.au

The reception area is welcoming; with attractivedisplays of model vehicles,and many certificatesadorn the walls

Ingrid Cilliers and AndréHattingh in their busy

and organised workshop

V e h i c l e E v a l u a t i o n

A u g u s t 2 0 1 060

InFigorating On 15th July2010 Ford introduced its much anticipated funky new Figoto the motoring media, and there were no surprises in store. The Figo,

“cool” in Italian parlance, is Ford’s strong foray into the crowded entry level segment of South Africa’s car market, and this invigorating, fun and fashionable compact car is sure to make an impact.

How big an impact is anyone’s guess? Depending on

which Ford executive you speak to, monthly

volumes of 700 to 3000 are possible. These

predictions vary from low-risk conservative to the

wildly optimistic, and are reliant on what the plant in Chennai,

India can feed South Africa. Chennai (Madras for old fogeys like

myself ) is fast becoming the small car Detroit of the automotive

world, with practically every single entry level vehicle I have come

across in the past few months built in this frenetic Indian city.

The state of Tamil Nadu must be offering some enticing deals,

and to hell with the WTO! Whatever, the Figos reaching our

shores will indeed make an impact, and the other manufacturers

of small cars must be looking on with trepidation.

What makes the Figo so intimidating to its competitors? Firstly,

the price. You get a lot of car for the Ambiente 1400 petrol

version for a mere R109 900. Secondly, you are getting a small car

with a big car feel. Scott Strong, Ford Asia Pacific and Africa

Design Director, puts it well, “Small doesn’t have to be boring.

Some manufacturers make the mistake of thinking small cars have

to look cute, almost toy like. Figo communicates solidness and

safety, and drives like a car rather than a toy”. Thirdly, economy is

the name of the game, and the Figo doesn’t disappoint. With serv-

ice intervals of 20 000 km for the petrol versions and 15 000 km

for the diesel version, combined with respective fuel consumption

of 6,61 and 5,3 l/100km, the old phrase of “ it runs on the smell

of an oil rag” could be thrown in. Add to this the comprehensive

warranty, and we’re talking serious value for money.

I could go into car speak and start talking about Ford’s kinetic

design philosophy, and B pillars and the like, but I leave the final

word to Ben Pillay, Ford Marketing Manager, “The Ford Figo is

an exciting new introduction to the local market. It offers both

style and practicality at an affordable price”. I couldn’t have put it

better, so if this has whetted your appetite, go to the internet and

get your fill of all the details. If you don’t know your way around

the internet, you are too old for this car.

by Howard Keeg

by Austin Gamble

L i f e G o e s o n

62

Mahindra Stays the CourseAs the world picks itself up from the great recession of 2008/2009,slowly but surely it is back to business as usual. For the automotiveindustry it has been a time a great disruptions, bankruptcies, and worseTime stood still for a while, with many projects either shelved or puton hold.

On the South African front, one of the companies that

had to tread water was Mahindra. Having entered

the local market in 2004 with an exciting line-up of

its SUV, Scorpio and Bolero range, and later on

adding the Xylo and the Thar, Mahindra had developed signifi-

cant momentum by 2007. The worldwide financial hiccups put a

stop to further developments, but now with the industry slowly

getting back on its feet, the time has come to review the situation.

Dr. Pawan Goenka, President, Automotive & Farm Equipment

Sectors, Mahindra & Mahindra Ltd and Chairman of Mahindra

South Africa, told the media at a function on 12 July 2010,

“The consolidation of our operations in 2008 and 2009 was a

clear validation of our commitment to the local market. We now

intend to extend our reach to the local tractor market as well”.

Mr. Pravin Shah, Chief Executive, International Operations, and

Automotive & Farm Equipment Sectors, Mahindra & Mahindra

Ltd., added that “South Africa offers great potential for Mahindra

and is a strategically important market for the company. We have

introduced the Xylo multi-purpose vehicle and the Thar 4x4 off-

roader, in addition to the refreshed Scorpio line up. Our dealer

network now includes more than 40 Sales and Service outlets,

ensuring countrywide coverage. We aim to leverage the synergies

of this network to build a robust tractor business in the country”.

Mahindra is one of the world’s top tractor brands and has been

the market leader in India for the past 27 years with the Group

enjoying a market share in excess of 40%. It now aims to replicate

its global success in the tractor market (Mahindra ranks number

one in the world in tractor sales, by volume) in South Africa, with

a strategy that includes introducing a number of new products,

both two- and four-wheel drive, after having launched its first

model locally in 2006.

Mahindra is on the march. It has diversified into aerospace,

defence, lifestyle, and IT. And anyone who attended the World

Cup games may have been intrigued by the Mahindra Satyam

signage. Satyam is an IT company that Mahindra acquired last

year, and Satyam was the official IT provider to the World Cup.

It is clear that Mahindra/Satyam intends to build a powerful

global brand, and their sponsorship of the World Cup was the

first Indian foray into global sports sponsorship.

From an automotive perspective, Mahindra has a lot to offer.

They offer the full gamut, from two wheelers to 49 ton trucks,

plus their exceptional agricultural offering. With 80% growth in

the first 6 months of 2010 (albeit from a depressed 2009), and the

expectation of robust growth in the next 18 months, assembly in

South Africa is definitely feasible, particularly in one takes into

account their African footprint. Rumours of a potential takeover

of SsangYong are also intriguing, as it will add another string to

their SUV bow.

Mr Pravin Shah (Chief Executive, International Operations, andAutomotive & Farm Equipment Sectors, Mahindra & Mahindra

Ltd) Dr Pawan Goenka (President, Automotive & Farm Equipment Sectors, Mahindra & Mahindra Ltd andChairman of Mahindra South Africa) and Mr Ashok Thakur

(CEO of Mahindra South Africa), at the media function on 12 July 2010.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

t h e B u z z ?

German Minister Visits VolkswagenGroup South Africa

The Interior and Sport Minister of the German province of LowerSaxony, Uwe Schünemann, visited Volkswagen Group South Africa’sUitenhage plant on Friday 9 July 2010. Schünemann was welcomedby the Company’s Managing Director, David Powels, who informedthe sports delegation about the modernisation of the plant, on whichR4 billion has been spent over the last three years. During a tour ofthe plant, Powels pointed out that Volkswagen Group South Africahas increased its market leadership in South Africa, with a strongmarket share of 21.2 percent during the first half of 2010. Powelsalso underlined the company’s successful strategy of localisation toincrease the efficiency of the Uitenhage plant. Over the past yearVolkswagen Group SA managed to bring new suppliers on boardand increased its local content levels from 40 to 70 percent.

Vespa Via Montenapoleone – scooter from the fashion capital

Milan’s most famous street of fashion, Via Montenapoleone, wasthe inspiration for the latest high-class offering from Vespa SouthAfrica. The GTV Via Montenapoleone is the exclusive amalga-mation of fashion, art, unsurpassed 300cc power and hi-endtechnology. The Vespa GTV 300 Via Montenapoleone reinter-prets the timeless style elements of its 1950’s predecessor.Featuring a 278cc engine with 4-valve single cylinder, electronicinjection and liquid-cooling, the bike’s pick-up and accelerationis fully optimised. The sleek Vespa GTV 300 ViaMontenapoleone has zipped off the narrow Milan lanes into theSouth African Vespa showrooms. Check out the dashing LucidoBlack model specifications on www.vespa.co.za

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

A u g u s t 2 0 1 064

Since 1909, quality Permatex® products have been used in workshops, garages, and racetracks around the world. Permatexhas built an enviable reputation on its ability to constantly bringout innovative and exciting products, with its understanding thatthe technician’s and DIY community’s needs are the primary concern. This is what drives Permatex, which makes innovationthrough research and development a Permatex hallmark. One example of this approach is Permatex’s solutions to gasketing.

TopClass MD, Richard Pinard

T o p C l a s s T o p i c s

The UltimateDispensing System

Gasket Makers and Sealants Made Easier

Permatex’s patented PowerBead™ Dispenser gives you enduring reliabilityand keeps on giving with the ultimate in pinpoint control, outstandingproduct performance and ease of use. Briefly, to summarise the benefits:

• Makes application quick and easy

• Extended, rigid nozzle gives pinpoint control

• Vertically-actuated valve design allows all material to be dispensed (NO WASTE) and eliminates clogging

• Product flow can be regulated easily, without finger fatigue

• Permatex branded comfort-grip

The PowerBead™ Advantage

The Permatex patented valve opens allinternal orifices, unlike standard tiltvalves, which only open a few.

Your benefit...virtually no clogging and smoother product flow with better control.

C o n s u m e r P r o t e c t i o n A c t

A u g u s t 2 0 1 066

Can clients score free parts withthe Consumer Protection Act?

ABR brings you a series of articles on the Consumer Protection Act.

by Alwyn Viljoen

By law, customers may now return any item half a year afterdelivery. Alwyn Viljoen explores how this may impacton the auto parts market.

More than a year after the President assented the new

Consumer Protection Act, the jury is still out on

what consumers can and will do with the new

rights bestowed on them by Act 68 of 2008.

These rights are vast. For example, if any goods (except goods

bought on auction) fail to satisfy any of the “Consumer’s rights

to good, safe quality goods” as listed in the 18 clauses and

sub-clauses of paragraph 55, the next paragraph 56(2) allows the

consumer to return those goods “within six months after delivery;

without penalty and at the suppliers’ risk and expense”.

At first glance, this six-months-to-return clause seems to open a

loophole for all kinds of abuse of suppliers of automotive parts.

Take, for example, selling a set of brake pads to a mini-bus taxi

driver. The Act grants the taxi-driver the legal right that his new

brake pads “will be useable and durable for a reasonable period of

time, having regard to the use of which they would normally be

put; and to all the surrounding circumstance of their supply”.

The key questions here for parts suppliers is what is a “reasonable

time” during which a taxi driver can expect to use his new brakes?

Can he, for example, return the used brakes after five months,

claiming the taxi is no longer stopping from 100-0 km/h within

60 metres when empty, as did the previous brake pads he bought

from the same store at the same mileage?

Any branch would save a lot of hassle and invest in a bit of

goodwill by just exchanging the used pads for new ones at the

store’s expense, as Act 68 in fact requires. In the worst case

scenario, however, the savvy taxi driver will tell all his mates how

to score free brake pads – or tyres, clutches, wiper blades, etc. – by

exploiting both the protection afforded by Act 68 of 2008 and the

reluctance of sales staff to displease a customer.

The good news is that the Consumer Protection Act does offer the

supplier a measure of protection, although its far from perfect:

Paragraph 55(6) states a consumer’s rights are excluded from sales

where the supplier “expressly informed” the consumer that

particular goods were offered in a specific condition, and if

the consumer has “expressly agreed to accept the goods in that

condition, or knowingly acted in a manner consistent with

accepting the goods in that condition”.

In other words, should our taxi driver start to abuse the Consumer

Protection Act, the sales staff better start telling him that his brake

pads are sold voetstoots, and then get his expressed agreement in

the form of his signature on the sales receipt, which must state this

condition of sale in writing. It’s that, or auctioning all goods.

What is Midas doing?As South Africa’s leading aftermarket automotive partssupplier with over 450 franchised outlets, Midas welcomes the new Consumer Protection Act, whichprotects both their walk-in clients and Midas franchisees.

Stefan Le Roux, franchise director at Midas, said thefirst step for Midas was and is still to understand the various and complex issues in the act – “we are currently short-listing the specifics per franchise andthe effect on the Midas Group”.

This includes ensuring that all the brands sold complywith the act, (which range from putting specific healthwarnings on the packaging to stipulating the correctways of disposing dangerous goods), and preparingtraining on the effects of the act for all franchisees.

Midas is also establishing electronic complaints procedures, product guides and audit trails to ensurecontinuous compliance.

“We are comfortable with the introduction of certainsections of the Act in that we have always been veryconscious of the quality of the products we sell,” said LeRoux.

He added that Midas already subscribed to the draftindustry code in conjunction with the RMI as theindustry awaits formal regulations from government.

67A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

D o g D a y A f t e r n o o n

A u g u s t 2 0 1 068

Fifi and the World PupFifi, as you probably will have deduced from the name, was a poodle.Although not much of a show dog herself, she took great pride inpresiding over what became known as the greatest show on earth,held every four years. Through careful management and an iron fistbehind the furry face, this show generated huge amounts of cash.There was so much money that, with her tail held upright, Fifi the poodle became known as Fifi the boodle.

Fifi was descended from a French poodle called Frank and

an Italian standard poodle called Lira and was sister to

the notorious Euro. Frank had settled in Switzerland

soon after Euro appeared on the scene, leaging to his

friends calling him Swiss Frank. Fifi set up her corporate head-

quarters in that country on account of its much admired neutral-

ity, and its refusal to disclose bank account details to the outside

world. Fifi’s organisational structure was the key to her success.

Not only had she cornered the global market on dog show organ-

isation and administration, she also held sway over all the judges

which officiated at the individual shows. Many of these judges,

despite holding international status, were real dogs themselves.

Visitors to the shows were frequently heard to remark that the

judging dogs appeared to need guide dogs to do their jobs better.

Frustration began building up, and suggestions were put forward

that technology be introduced to assist the judges. Fifi turned

down these suggestions, saying that dog shows had to move

quickly, but secretly worrying about the attention spans of the

participating show dogs, which she knew to be pretty feeble. Part

of Fifi’s organisational success came from the prolific money mak-

ing proficiencies of her near relative, a dog called Patch. Patch

had a monopoly on kennels and entry tickets for all the big shows,

and did not hesitate to load Mastiff sized margins onto Terrier

sized benefits. Despite having structures in over 200 hundred

countries and territories across the globe, Fifi and Patch knew very

well that big money in the dog show business was in Europe.

They therefore tried for many decades to have every second inter-

national show somewhere on that continent. Notwithstanding

the obvious location bias, from 1970, the dogs winning the best-

on-show award came alternately from Europe and South America.

Some sceptics held the view that the successful South American

packs were good enough to win because of the genes that had fled

to that continent from middle Europe in 1945.

A dog without a ball is a sorry sight. Show dogs learn to perform

without being near a ball, but the sometimes unexpected dips,

swerves and bounces of the ball introduced by Fifi in the 2010

World Cur Show seemed to have many of them totally baffled.

Eventually, the gun dogs were seen to hold the advantage, simply

because they could shoot better.

But Fifi always knew the score. Working dogs are there to work,

to earn money to pay to see the show dogs. Media dogs are there

to keep the hype up. Police dogs are there to provide security and

prevent ambushes. Sniffer dogs have been known to coach nation-

al packs when they get too old to run around the showroom itself.

WATS Bloemfontein 21st Oct 2010! – “One Night ONLY!”With a focus on Vehicle Diagnostic Scanners, Auto ElectricalTraining, New Technology, Parts, Tools & Garage Equipment, thevery first Workshop Aftermarket & Technology Show (WATS) taking place at Ilanga Estate in Bloemfontein on 21st October from16:00 to 22:00 promises to be another OFS Success Story. TheWATS Expo, which from its inception in 2005 has enjoyed the fullendorsement of the Retail Motor Industry of S.A. is this year privileged, to for the very first time work side by side with RMIRegional Manager for the Free State Mr. Louis van Huyssteen & hisDynamic Team.

This show offers Visitors & Exhibitors the best in:

• Valuable exposure of the Automotive Aftermarket suppliers & visitors alike.

• Perfect opportunity to launch new brands.• Networking with high quality clients and suppliers face to face.

• Minimal staff absence & overhead for this one day only event.(Fast & Furious)

• Stylish shell schemes, modern & vibrant atmosphere. This is a fantastic opportunity for companies to showcase theirproducts or technology to the Automotive Aftermarket of the FreeState, as there has NEVER before been a TECHNOLOGY expo ofthis type in BLOEMFONTEIN!!.• Free Boerie rolls & Beer/coldrinks to visitors/exhibitors @

18h00. • Gorgeous girls giving away T-shirts in a way you would never

expect!• Prizes to be Won!• Cash Bar will also be available.

For further information visit www.wats.co.za where you can registeron-line or contact Miranda on: 082 9680 214 & admin@wats.co.zaor Johann on: 082 5515 061 & info@wats.co.za

by Tony Twine

This article originally appeared in www.newstime.co.za – our grateful thanks to David Bullard for permission to re-publish

A u g u s t 2 0 1 070

Policing PrioritiesSap is a word that can be used either as a noun or a verb,depending on the context. It can also have many meanings, onceagain depending on the context. As a noun it could be the juiceof a plant, or it can also define a gullible or foolish person.When used as a verb, it generally means to weaken, deplete orundermine. Thus, it is no coincidence that our police farce (eh,force) are so well described as SAPS. Let me elucidate.

In late May 2010, less than two

weeks before the official opening

of the FIFA (which does not stand

for fellatio in football attire, but

it’s not far off ) World Cup, the

wife of a colleague of mine was

brutally attacked by two armed currently

advantaged thugs. In her very own house,

nogal. In a normal society their savage

behaviour, i.e. attempted murder, mali-

cious and aggravated assault, armed rob-

bery, housebreaking, and a few more

charges that could be thrown at the perpe-

trators, would all be defined as extremely

serious crime, and would bring about an

immediate and strong reaction by the

enforcers of the law. What one would

expect in a civilised society. Foolishly, some

of us think that this would be the reaction

from SAPS. Foolish we indeed are, and

gullible to boot. We are the saps, and we

are being weakened, depleted and under-

mined, in other words, sapped, by our

gullibility.

Ten days after the event, and still waiting

for the police to come and take a state-

ment, my colleague and his wife had to go

to the Sandton Police Station to enquire

why a serious crime did not even warrant

an investigation. And to add even further

shame on the police, the assault details

which had been assiduously recorded at

the Sunninghill Hospital on the designat-

ed form, was gathering dust at Casualty.

The “investigating” officer had not even

bothered to collect this vital piece of evi-

dence. Nor was he interested in doing any

forensic investigation at the scene of the

crime. My colleague soon found out why –

the detective assigned to the case was

doing guard duty at FIFA VIP hotels.

Sepp Blatter and his cronies’ security was

obviously far more important than the

security of the citizens of South Africa.

The only conclusion that I can come to is

that we have a shockingly dysfunctional

police farce (sorry, force), and that we are

not safe in our own homes. Rather be a

FIFA official – then your safety is para-

mount in the eyes of General Bheki Cele,

following in the glorious tradition of other

generals such as Idi Amin, and Minister

Nathi Mthethwa, who believes in staying

at one star hotels.

by Fingal Wilde

W i l d e T h i n g s

This bullet was centimetres away fromtaking a life – but the thing who pulled

the trigger is still running around, knowing that the police are not even

bothering to look for him

Or this very dangerousman who walked intoan England soccerteam dressing room –he was arrested for thisviolent act!

This is not General Cele, it isGeneral Amin

I demand thatSAPS protect me,and not the sapsof South Africa

The police were more interested inarresting ladies for wearing orange

dresses and looking dangerous!

H o g g W a s h

A u g u s t 2 0 1 072

Ireally did try to get into the spirit of things. I even managed

to attend two games, at Loftus Versveld and Soccer City, and

was impressed with the organisation and the

facilities. Yet the games themselves left me

singularly unimpressed, and the only thing

that left me overwhelmingly impressed

was the superb Soccer City, or FNB

Stadium, or National Stadium, or

whatever they eventually decide to

call it. Over and above the architec-

tural heritage left to us, it was a

struggle to truly understand what

all the excitement was about. The

whole extravaganza was built on

the game of soccer, but the game is

not so beautiful.

After my brief flirtation during the

group stages, I took a sabbatical, and only

came alive at the semi-final stage, and must

admit that the Netherlands Uruguay game was

well worth watching with two particularly stunning

strikes, and so my cynicism was somewhat blunted. The third and

fourth place play off was even better, with Germany and Uruguay

dishing up five great goals. Maybe, just maybe, I said to myself,

all my scepticism was unfounded. I looked forward to a final that

would convert me for life. All the money and hype was going to

deliver a new recruit. I settled down and waited for Howard

Webb’s whistle, and a moment that was going to change my life.

The illusion was shattered within five minutes. Three dramatic

falls from the Spanish players in a few minutes set the tone for the

rest of the game and Howard Webb was like a deer caught in the

headlights. The Jules Rimet trophy was obviously so important to

the Spaniards that they were prepared to con their way to the

silverware. Coach Del Bosque had the players well versed in every

aspect, with the most important lesson drilled deep into the

players that of the dramatic fall and scream if touched by an

opposition player. It became a yellow card bonanza, and when

there was a sniff of a red card the whole Spanish team became a

discordant ensemble of entreaties and worse, and an en

bloc pressure point, which unfortunately became

a web of deceit for Webb, who did not have

the confidence and ability to put the bull-

shit down with a firm hand. Talking

about bulls, I realised how well trained

the matadors were when the goalie

took a big tumble over his own

player, and was up in an instant.

He reserved his histrionics for yel-

low and red card territory, i.e. when

touched by an opposition player.

No wonder the Spanish colours are

red and yellow – it is the colour of the

cards they are taught to wheedle out of

the refs. The Netherlands team, on the

other hand, were poorly trained, and it cost

them the game. Late in the second half, Arjen

Robben was held back by a Spanish player on his

way to the goal line and an almost certain goal. Instead

of taking a dramatic tumble, which would have earned the

defender a red card, and Robben a free kick just outside the

penalty area, the fool stayed on his feet. Del Bosque looked on

contemptuously.

I switched off the TV in disgust at full time. The only thing that

would have kept me watching was the sight of Bakkies Botha

running on to the field. He would have shown Webb a thing or

two about physical fouls, and would have given the Spanish good

reason to writhe in pain. Bakkies would have head butted his way

to red card glory in micro seconds, and the field would have been

devoid of any players before anyone got warmed up. I look

forward to my next trip to Soccer City – to watch a real man’s

game – rugby.

By the way, what was the final score in that other silly game?

by Gilbert Hogg

The Spanish football side in training

The Beautiful ConBefore I begin my reflections on the feckless 2010 Fufa™ World Cup,and the ficking fankless football supremos, let me make a significantconfession. I am a rugger bugger. Before this soccer circus came to ourshores, I had yet to watch a full game of soccer, either live or on TV.I am not really qualified to make comment on this not so beautiful game,but the editor insists that I give it a go.

T H e F i n k

A u g u s t 2 0 1 076

Dear Fink,

WHAT IS GOOD DRIVING?

I write this in response to your June article on ‘The Importance of Careful Driving’. As one of the millions of road users exposed to

South African traffic (and South African drivers) on a daily basis, I find traffic rather fascinating. It ebbs and flows and has a life of

its own. South Africans are often caught referring to traffic as if it were a living, breathing entity.

Despite the fact that we bear grudging respect for traffic, even planning our daily routes and routines around it, we do not have the

same respect for our fellow drivers. These people, who are like us in so many ways, are a nuisance, an obstacle for us to beat, rather

than being fellow road users. We are quick to judge others as bad drivers, without ever taking the time to analyse our own driving.

The key though here is ‘good’ versus ‘bad’ driving. What make a good driver? Is it driving according to the rules of the road? Or is

it being conscious of how our actions affect others on the road, and then driving accordingly.

I’ll give you an example. Mr Joe Bloggs is in a hurry to get to work. He is driving along a single lane road marked with a 80km/hour

speed limit. His path is blocked by Mrs Robinson, an 80 year old lady travelling on the same stretch of road, but only at 60km/hour.

Mrs Robinson has every right to travel at her chosen speed, but does that make her a good driver for travelling at that speed?

Mr Bloggs is prevented from driving at the posted 80km/hour speed limit, and desperate to get to work, overtakes Mrs Robinson,

narrowly avoiding oncoming traffic, and hooting at Mrs Robinson on his way past. Who is the bad driver now? Mrs Robinson was

being inconsiderate to her fellow road users by not driving at the posted speed, but Mr Bloggs nearly caused a collision by overtak-

ing her.

If you watch how people drive, and how little cognisance they have of the effect their driving has on others, you would be amazed

that there are not more road accidents on our roads. Drivers are hypocrites in that they commit the same offences that they will

berate others for committing.

One driver will happily force her way into a too-small gap in traffic, resulting in a ripple of sudden braking in the flow of traffic she

has disrupted. The driver behind her who has just avoided rear-ending her will hoot his disapproval, and she will get angry with him

for not being more polite. However, three blocks down the road, another road user will cut in front of the same lady, and she will

in turn lay her hand on the hooter and express her disapproval at the same manoeuvre she herself pulled a few minutes prior.

She will consider herself justified in both actions, despite the fact that they are on opposite sides of the coin. She believes she is a

good driver for successfully entering the flow of traffic, despite the negative effects of her actions on her fellow drivers. Yet she will

get angry when someone points out that it was not polite. Then she will rage against someone who did exactly the same action she

did, and call him a bad driver.

We are quick to claim that others are bad drivers, but is it not bad driving when we do exactly the same thing? What makes a bad

driver? This is a debate that will rage on for as long as the motor car exists. I do believe though that with a bit more tolerance for

our fellow road users, a bit more understanding and consideration, the roads of South Africa will be a far more pleasant place to

travel.

Bronwyn Maclaurin

Letters to the EditorThe winner of this month’s “Letters to the Editor” competition is Bronwyn Maclaurin,who responded to our Spirit of Safety column in the June 2010 issue. Bronwyn givesan interesting perspective on what is “good” and what is “bad” driving. The importantaspect of this letter is that Bronwyn shows a high degree of awareness of the importance of careful driving, which is what our Spirit of Safety series is all about.For this effort, Bronwyn wins for herself a R500 Midas gift voucher.

T H e F i n k

Win a Midas VoucherThe FINK is looking for letters to the

Editor. The more the merrier, and the more

thought provoking of these shall find their

way into ABR. The best letter will win a

Midas voucher to the value of R500. So get

out those pens and write to:

The FinkP O Box 102Wendywood, 2144Or Fax 0866 579 289Or email:bigheart@iafrica.comThe judges decision, no

matter how one

eyed they are,

will be final.

83

A close second in the best letter stakes is Johan Nel, who sent this letter to Alfred Teves Brake Systems (Pty) Ltd. Ate passed it onto us, and we

just loved Johan’s description of our June 2010 front cover as “pure automotive porn”. Wow, Johan, you have just sent a shot across the bows

of Hugh Hefner’s Palms Hotel penthouse in Las Vegas! Johan has also asked a few questions, which I am sure that the Ate marketing team

have answered.

Dear Marketing Team.

You have hit the jackpot with the front cover of the June 2010 Automotive Business Review maga-

zine. To a petrol head like me it was pure automotive porn to see a grooved cross drilled vented disc

supporting a dark blue anodized 4 pot aluminum caliper. Congratulations must go to the whole

ATE management team as well for realizing that a market for such an item exists and having the guts

to go ahead and manufacture such an item when S.A. is really still suffering from the recession after-

shock.

I have one problem with the Halo range of calipers. No information is available on your web site

yet, or is it because they have not officially been released yet? I am particularly interested in the

weight of these calipers, because the decrease in unsprung weight is as important to making a car

change direction, as the ability of the caliper to clamp the disc rotating through it properly. Secondly,

I would like to know, if possible, the diameter and thickness range these calipers were built for. If

you can confirm that the calipers were made to fit original disc diameters and thickness for the cars

listed in the article in the ABR magazine, it will already go a long way towards setting my mind at

ease. In other words these calipers were designed as a caliper upgrade only from stock standard orig-

inal manufacturer specification calipers for Opel, Toyota, Golf etc.

Keep up the good work, and I really hope that I can fit a set of these calipers to my car once I have more information.

Kind Regards.

Johan Nel.

And finally, this came to us from

an obvious motorsport fan in

Durban. It is a plea worth con-

sidering, so we pass it on.

KwaZulu Natal is the only major

province without a decent motor

racing track, so we support this

petition.

F1 Celebrates 60 Years60 years of Formula 1 Grand Prix racing was celebrated at the BritishGrand Prix at Silverstone on Sunday, the 11th July, when the F1 racing circus came back to its original home. Grand Prix racing of themodern era all started on May 13th 1950, when Silverstone hostedthe first post-war Formula 1 Grand Prix on a converted bomber basenorth of London. Entries were made up of pre-war British and Italiancars. It was won by an Alfa Romeo Tipo 158 driven by Farina.

by Roger McCleery

Answers From page 16

1. VW Polo

2. Lewis Hamilton

3. Hyundai / Kia

4. Korea

5. Fourth

6. Valentino Rossi

7. Killarney, Cape Town

8. Zwartkops

9. Deneysville

10. Pirelli

11. 2018

12. Dave Powels

13. Imperial and McCarthy

14. Foton (China)

15. Isuzu

16. Continental

17. Chevrolet

18. Louis

19. Midas

20. VW

The celebration in the heartland of Grand Prix racing

with a huge concentration of motorsport fans

almost didn’t happen. Bernie Ecclestone, the

Formula 1 supremo, had threatened to remove the

British Grand Prix from the calendar unless a big

investment was made and Silverstone heavily revamped.

Donnington was the next choice, but it had to be revamped as

well. They couldn’t meet the deadlines and when Tom

Wheatcroft, the owner of this parkland circuit died, Donnington

was dug up and derelict. So Grand Prix racing reverted to

Silverstone. Silverstone looked fantastic at its reopening. It has

retained lots of the previous features – fast straights and high

speed corners, which drivers love, and has added a few more. It’s

great and is a real GP circuit, certainly compared to some of the

other Mickey Mouse tracks grand prix cars go to with lots of

chicanes and slow speed corners built normally to please

Governments with lots of money and only a few enthusiasts in

their country. The weather, the new track, the sideshows and the

huge crowds, (over 300,000 attended over the weekend) made for

a memorable programme to prove that giving Silverstone the

British Grand Prix until 2018 is the correct decision. Particularly

as most of the cars and components are made in Milton Keynes,

just down the road.

Racing was dramatic without being great. Sebastian Vettel once

again took pole position in the Red Bull with a highly upset and

determined Aussie, Mark Webber, alongside him. Webber had his

very fancy front wing taken off his car and given to Vettel when

is dropped down on the road for some reason. Alonso was 3rd in

an improved Ferrari. Webber took off from the dirty side of the

track and led into the first corner, and was gone with Lewis

Hamilton (McLaren) on his tail throughout. On the first lap

Vettel went off and got a puncture, Alonso and Massa collided

with each other and both suffered damage.

The worst decision which ruined the race for Alonso for the

second meeting in a row was made by the stewards and Nigel

Mansell, who was the drivers’ advisor on the panel. They handed

out a drive-through penalty for going onto the grass inside Kubica

in a corner, who at that time was about to retire. Stewards in my

book should be locked up in a dark room with no sight of a TV

screen. They can then review any incidents at the end of a race

and hand out any time penalties.

Rosberg did well with a 3rd for Mercedes Benz, while team-mate

Michael Schumacher, had a great 4-way dice down the pack.

In my book the European GP in Valencia was not really what you

would call a Grand Prix. Run around a featureless warehouse-

lined dockyard in Valencia, it has concrete walls on both sides of

the track all the way around. Except for a bridge. They claim big

crowds attended, but they must have been hidden as they didn’t

show up on TV. Why go to a dockyard when they have got an

arena circuit just outside town used by the Moto-GP and

Superbikes? Anyway, the race was memorable. The safety car

brought problems. A whining Alonso moaned that something

should be done about Lewis Hamilton, who had taken advantage

and slotted in high up the grid. Also I couldn’t understand why

Michael Schumacher down in the pack who pitted, was only

allowed out of the pits at the back of the field.

Vettel’s win in Spain possibly made up for colliding with Webber

in Turkey who retired to the pits without any points. Basically it

put Webber in No 2 spot in the team despite his contract saying

there are no favourites.

Despite Formula 1 rules that there no-ways can be a No 1 and

No 2 driver and no team instructions may be made to drivers.

Who are they kidding? Motorsport has always been about the

individual. People generally don’t give a hoot about the

Manufacturers or Team Championships.

After the forthcoming Hockenheim, which has lost its character

by losing its long straights, and follow-my-leader Hungary, there

is a 28-day break in August until the 29th, when the greatest of

all tracks, Spa in Belgium, will host Round 13.

A u g u s t 2 0 1 078

F a s t W h e e l s

Midas Keeps the Flag FlyingHistoric car racing is alive and well and living in South Africa, and has a huge follow-ing, both from a competitor and spectator point of view. This year a regional series isattracting the crowds from Midvaal to Killarney, and nationally there are four annual3 hour races, held in Durban, Kyalami, East London and Killarney. Recently, theZwartkops Raceway attracted an entry of over 250 vehicles, which proves the immensepopularity of the genre, and a yearning for the good old days.

79

M i d a s S p o r t

A series of articles on Midas motorsport initiatives in 2010

There are many classes that cater for the full spectrum; from true classics to well used

bangers, but the crème de la crème of historics is the Classic Thoroughbred Saloon series.

This series has been made possible by the sponsorship of Midas, who have re-entered

motorsport sponsorship. Stefan le Roux, Midas Franchise, Marketing and Commercial

Vehicle Director, explains the Midas philosophy, “Midas has the biggest automotive fran-

chise footprint across southern Africa, and therefore it is important for the Midas Franchise brand to

be seen to be associated with motorsport. High profile sponsorships are very expensive, so we prefer to

spread our sponsorship spend around, across various motorsport activities, from production cars, the

V8 Supercars, the Formula Ford series, the Clubman series in Cape Town, off-road racing, and the

Classic Thoroughbred Saloon series.

We recognise our leadership role in the automotive aftermarket,

and our participation in motorsport and related activities across

the country is our way of putting something back for our cus-

tomers and franchisees, in a structured and responsible manner”.

ABR managed to catch up with Nicholas Sheward, Chairman of

the Classic Thoroughbred Saloon series, at Midvaal on 17th July

2010. Nicholas is busy restoring some of these “real cars”, and he

is encouraging the growth of this historic class of vehicle. Classic

Thoroughbreds encompass the original race cars that raced in the

enthralling saloon car races in the 1960’s, 1970’s and 1980’s.

Iconic names and brands such as Hepburn, Poulter, Viana,

Barnard, Lindenberg; Cortina Perana, Capri V6, Gunston Z181

are just some that roll off Nicholas’ tongue.

ABR shall revisit this nostalgic era in future issues.

A Midas MotorsportPlymouth Fury, drivenby Hennie Groenewald,

lifts off around the corner at Zwartkops

Raceway. This car wasbuilt by Peter du Toit,

who owns theZwartkops circuit.

Pic acknowledgement :Dave Hastie, Classic &Performance Car Africa

Peter Lindenberg isalso a great fan of clas-sic thoroughbreds. He

says that these race carshave to be totally

original, and he addsthat Midas is playing

an important role withtheir sponsorship of this

series

Nicholas Sheward, Chairman of theClassic Thoroughbred Saloon series,says that “the competitors of classicthoroughbreds are the custodians ofSouth African saloon car history. Weare extremely grateful to Midas for

their sponsorship of this iconic class”

A u g u s t 2 0 1 0

A u g u s t 2 0 1 080

T h e L a s t W r i t e s by Baron Claude Borlz

“For our more discerning readers .....”

Answer from page 8CIGARETTE: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper

with fire at one end and a fool at the other!

MARRIAGE: It's an agreement wherein a man loses

his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

LECTURE: An art of transmitting Information

from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students

without passing through the minds of either

CONFERENCE: The confusion of one man multi-

plied by the number present

COMPROMISE: The art of dividing a cake in such

a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece

TEARS: The hydraulic force by which masculine will

power is defeated by feminine water-power!

CONFERENCE ROOM: A place where everybody

talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on

ECSTASY: A feeling when you feel you are going to

feel a feeling you have never felt before

SMILE: A curve that can set a lot of things straight!

OFFICE: A place where you can relax after your

strenuous home life

YAWN: The only time when some married men

ever get to open their mouth

EXPERIENCE: The name men give to their

Mistakes

DIPLOMAT: A person who tells you to go to hell in

such a way that you actually look forward to the trip

MISER: A person who lives poor so that he can die

RICH!

FATHER: A banker provided by nature

BOSS: Someone who is early when you are late and

late when you are early

POLITICIAN: One who shakes your Hand before

elections and your Confidence later

DOCTOR: A person who kills your ills by pills, and

kills you by his bills!

“Maradona believes in using the sponsorsproducts, and he is a great fan of Coke”

Jimmy tells Mike …..He's thinkingof buying a Labrador.

“Are you mad??? !!!!” say's Mike!“Have you seen how many of their

owners go blind??”

And talking about the self-made English, here are some classics that came out (from England!) afterEngland’s dismal performance in the World Cup:

• David Blaine is reportedly furious – his record of doing absolutely nothing in a box for 42 days hasbeen broken by Wayne Rooney

• The England team visited an orphanage in Cape Town during the World Cup. “It’s heartbreaking tosee their sad little faces with no hope” said Jamal, aged six

• I’ve just won two tickets to see the England team. Do you want to come with – we’ll catch the busto Gatwick Airport and watch then come home

• I hear Oxo are making a new product. The packaging is white with a red cross and they’re calling itthe laughing stock

• Fabio Capello was wheeling his shopping trolley at a Tesco parking lot when he noticed an old ladystruggling with her bags. He stopped and asked, “Can you manage, dear?”. The old lady replied, “Noway, you got yourself into this mess, don’t ask me to sort it out!”

• Apparently that fan had no trouble slipping into the England dressing room – Rob Green was guarding the door

• I can’t believe we only managed a draw against a rubbish team we should have annihilated. I’m ashamed to call myself Algerian

• What does an Englishman do when England wins the World Cup? He switches off the Play Station

Another classic:HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR OWN AGEAND THINKING, SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD? WELL . . . YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE.

MY NAME IS ALICE, AND I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MYFIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLO-MA ON THE WALL, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME. SUDDENLY, I REMEM-BERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAMEHAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 30-ODD YEARS AGO.COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAYBACK THEN? UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANYSUCH THOUGHT. THIS BALDING, GREY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLYLINED FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE. AFTER HEEXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGANPARK HIGH SCHOOL. 'YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG,' HE GLEAMEDWITH PRIDE. ‘WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?’ I ASKED. HE ANSWERED, 'IN1975. WHY DO YOU ASK? ''YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!’ I EXCLAIMED. HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALDING, WRIN-KLED FACED, FAT-ASSED, GREY-HAIRED, DECREPIT SON-OF-A-BITCHASKED,"WHAT DID YOU TEACH?"

The old ones are still the best. Here is the perennial British joke:The Scots keep the Sabbath – and anything else they can lay their hands on

The Welsh pray on their knees – and on their neighboursThe English proclaim they are self-made men – thus relieving the Almighty of a terrible burden

The Irish don’t know what they want – but by God they’re willing to die for it!

After Nigeria waseliminated from the

World Cup, theNigerian goalkeeper

has personallyoffered to refund allthe expenses of fans

who travelled toSouth Africa.

He said he just needstheir bank details

and pin numbers to complete the transaction.