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SATURDAY, JANUARY 13, 2007 concordmonitor.com CONCORD, NEW HAMPSHIRE 50¢

MESSYSnow and raintoday, overcasttonight. High41, low 22.Emily Santis,7, of Hopkintondraws the day.B6

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Carolynne St. Pierre pauses to compose herself while recording a video for her children. Her sister, Sara Matters (right), and cousin, Anna Stoessinger, com-fort her. Two months ago, doctors told Carolynne she would survive for only a matter of weeks or months. Her current hospital stay has taken a heavy toll.

By CHELSEA CONABOYMonitor staff

Three days after doctorstold Carolynne St.Pierre that liver can-cer could take herwithin two weeks, she

stood at the bathroom sink, care-fully applying purple eye shadow.Her head was mostly hairless frommonths of chemotherapy.

“Rich, what hat should I wear?”she called out to her husband inthe kitchen, who was running inand out, carrying in trays of foodfrom a caterer. “Nothing reallygoes with this.”

Although days later she wouldbe propped on pillows on thecouch, fighting off fatigue to sort

through photographs and findthose that will be displayed at herfuneral, this day, Dec. 16, Car-olynne would host her friends andfamily for an early Christmas cele-bration at her Concord home.

Carolynne had spent the past2½ years battling an uncommonand aggressive cancer calledcholangiocarcinoma, but now herbody was deteriorating quickly.Doctors told her there was littlemore they could do. The news bur-dened her with a more certaindeath and weighed on her family. Italso gave her a new kind ofcourage.

She invited people into herhome, overcoming self-conscious-ness about what cancer had done

to her body and the depression ithad caused her. She returned tohumor despite the grim prognosis.And though saying goodbye hadlong seemed daunting, she put ontape what could be her last – andmost lasting – words to her threechildren.

“I am actually more – I don’tknow if I want to say accepting ofthe whole process, because I’venever felt that way – but I’m not asunaccepting of it that I’m so upsetthat I don’t do anything else,” shesaid. “I definitely think, in astrange way . . . it changed ourfocus. It kind of changed ourworld.”

‘The sea of grief is coming’As Carolynne St. Pierre acknowledges her imminent death,

she finds some release. For loved ones, sorrow grows heavier.

PRESTON GANNAWAY / Monitor staff

By MARGOT SANGER-KATZMonitor staff

The federal tax evasion trial of Edand Elaine Brown suffered an inter-ruption yesterday when the couplefailed to appear in U.S. District Courtin Concord. Ed Brown, who describedthe proceedings as a “kangaroocourt” in a telephone interview yes-terday, said that he’s been disappoint-ed with the judge’s management ofthe case and doesn’t intend to return.

“What’s the point?” he said. “Yousaw what happened (Thursday).”

The Browns, who live in Plainfield,are charged with conspiring to evadetheir income taxes, conspiring to dis-guise large financial transactions anddisguising large financial transac-tions. Elaine Brown, who earned mostof the couple’s income, is also chargedwith multiple counts of tax evasionand failing to collect employmenttaxes from the workers at her dentalpractice.

Yesterday, Ed Brown said, he was“negotiating” with court officials byoffering to pay the estimated $625,000in back taxes that IRS officials say he

PLAINFIELD

Defendants skip court,asking, ‘What’s the point?’

Tax trialcomesto a halt

By SARAH LIEBOWITZMonitor staff

State Rep. Steve Vaillancourt – whohas accused longtime Democratic offi-cial Raymond Buckley of possessingchild pornography – said yesterdaythat he has no “hard and fast proof” toback up the allegations. Vaillancourt’scharges recently derailed Buckley’sbid to become Democratic Party chair-man, a post he was all but certain towin.

“Most of the things I’ve said I don’thave proof about,” Vaillancourt said ata press conference yesterday. “I havestuff that would tend to corroboratesome of the things that I’ve said, nothard and fast proof that would everconvict somebody.”

In a letter to Gov. John Lynch lastmonth, Vaillancourt accused Buckleyof scouring the internet for childpornography, making lewd commentsabout a boy and hiding child pornogra-phy inside Newsweek and other maga-

Porn allegations derailedBuckley’s chairman bid

Vaillancourt:I don’t havehard proof

See VAILLANCOURT –– A8

See BROWNS –– A8

See ST. PIERRE –– A4

By MARGOT SANGER-KATZMonitor staff

The family of a Bow man whowas killed in a murder-suicide in2005 has filed a lawsuit against theestate of the shooter and therestaurant where the shooterdrank on the night of the killing.

The lawsuit, filed in MerrimackCounty Superior Court, alleges thatJoseph E. Grigas and the ChenYang Li Restaurant in Bow bothbore responsibility for the wrongfuldeath of Elmer “Al” Rule, a statepolice dispatcher who was killed bythree bullet wounds on Nov. 18,2005.

According to an investigationcompleted by the state attorney

general’s office in June, Grigasshot Rule at the foot of his owndriveway before turning the gun onhimself. The men knew each otherthrough Rule’s son, who was friend-ly with Grigas.

Earlier that evening, Grigasspent an hour and a half at the barof Chen Yang Li. His bar tab totaled$20.90.

“We believe that there are peo-ple who are liable, first and fore-most Mr. Grigas, the shooter,” saidJohn Kacavas, who is representingRule’s wife, Karen Rule, and AlRule’s estate.

“We believe the restaurant con-tributed by over-serving Mr. Gri-gas.”

An autopsy showed that Grigas’sblood alcohol concentration was0.282 at the time of his death, more

BOW

Chen Yang Li accusedof over-serving shooter

Murder-suicide leads tolawsuit against restaurant

See LAWSUIT –– A8

PEMBROKE

County: Hold rapist past sentence

By ANNMARIE TIMMINSMonitor staff

The Merrimack CountyAttorney’s Office filed a petitionyesterday to keep a convictedsex offender in prison beyondhis release date so medicalexperts can determine whetherhe remains a violent sexualpredator.

The petition arrived at theMerrimack County SuperiorCourt yesterday afternoon, thesame day William Decato, 50,was to be released after servingall of his 8-year sentence. Prisonofficials moved Decato from hiscell in Berlin to the Concordprison yesterday and will keephim in Concord at least until thecourt can hold a hearing Tues-day on the countyattorney’s

petition.Decato, who was convicted in

1999 of raping and attempting torape two exotic dancers he hadhired to come to his Pembrokehome, is the first person to beheld beyond release under the

state’s newsexual offenderlaw. Decatoq u a l i f i e sbecause he hasbeen convictedof three violentsexual offens-es, the countyattorney’s peti-tion said. Inaddition, he

refused to participate in a sexualoffender treatment program or asubstance abuse treatmentwhile in prison, the petition said.

By filing the petition yester-day, the county attorney’s officehas initiated a multi-stepprocess. A judge will decide

Tuesday, the first day the courtis open after the weekend,whether there is probable causethat Decato is a sexual predatorand likely to reoffend. If thejudge does not find probablecause, Decato will be released.

If the judge does find proba-ble cause, Decato will be held atleast 72 hours so a team of men-tal health experts can assessDecato, his criminal record andhis behavior in prison, includinghis participation in treatmentprograms. If the team concludesthat Decato does not pose athreat, he will be released.

If they find otherwise, Decatowill continue to be held, and thecounty attorney’s office will havetwo days to file a second petitionseeking that Decato be held forup to five years and treated forhis sexual violent tendencies. (Ifhe remains a threat at the end of

DeCato would befirst under new law

DeCato

See SEX OFFENDER –– A8

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SEA OF GRIEFA4 SATURDAY, JANUARY 13, 2007 CONCORD MONITOR

At Waters Funeral Home, Richard Jacques shows caskets to Rich. He started to make arrange-ments before Christmas after doctors said Carolynne might not make it to the new year.

“It just keeps hurting even more.”

At a Christmas party, Carolynne makes a toast, thanking former co-workers for theirfriendship and support. Her family says the influx of visitors has given her a boost.

Family members said it was heartening to watchCarolynne’s fear fade. But as the reality of herprognosis sunk in, what peace they had unraveled.

Diagnosis, then a weddingCarolynne, 44, was diagnosed with cholangiocar-

cinoma in April 2004. Days later, she and Rich mar-ried. Their son, Elijah, was 1½ years old at the time.Melissa and Brian Thone, children from her firstmarriage, were 9 and 11.

In the two years that followed, Carolynne wouldendure a long and painful recovery from surgerythat removed a third of her liver, three cancer-freemonths cut short by the discovery of a new tumor,and hospital stays due to complications. She left ajob she loved as a nurse in the nursery of ConcordHospital’s Family Place. She received multiplegloomy prognoses and outlasted each one.

Starting in early 2005, she made long and tiringtrips to New York to see Dr. Howard Bruckner, atrailblazer in chemotherapy. Drained by powerfuldrugs, Carolynne spent many afternoons alone onthe couch, watching TV or reading. She turnedaway visitors.

She set goals for herself from month to month:When she saw Brian off to middle school and Melis-sa to high school last fall, her next long-term objec-tive was to help Elijah enter kindergarten this fall.

Last March, the St. Pierres invited the Monitorto follow them. Rich, who lost his mother when hewas 7 years old and can’t remember her, looked forways to build a record of Carolynne for Elijah andthe older kids, over whom he has guardianship.

A profile of the family published in October docu-mented Carolynne’s fight for more time with herkids. The story ended with her and Rich bound fortreatment in New York.

When Carolynne arrived there, blood testsshowed her liver was not processing well enough tohandle the heavy toxins she had been receiving.She took a lower dose.

She hasn’t received treatment since. Bouts offever and signs of low liver function have preventedit. Ammonia that would have been caught by her

liver began collecting in her blood, causing confu-sion. She forgot names and needed help sorting herpills each day. Her feet and lower legs swelled fromfluid retention until she couldn’t fit into any of hershoes. She shuffled instead of walked. She sleptmore and more. Rich watched her carefully; doc-tors warned that she could slip into a coma.

In November, doctors told Carolynne she hadmonths or even weeks to live.

Carolynne didn’t cry. She barely reacted, even asshe talked with Melissa and Brian about the prog-nosis.

“I just feel so flat,” she said later. “I feel like nowI don’t know anything because they said ‘weeks.’ ”

At a Dec. 13 appointment, an oncologist said shewas “semi-comatose.” Again, the doctor said she

had weeks to live, but this time just one or two.That day, Rich took Carolynne to see the ceme-

tery plot he had recently purchased for the family.He set up an appointment with a minister and visit-ed a funeral home. Her mom, two sisters andcousin made plans to drive up from New Jerseyand New York. Rich asked Carolynne’s older sister,Sara Matters, to write an obituary.

The next night, Carolynne got up to go to thebathroom, blacked out and fell into the tub. She wasnot seriously hurt. But she was scared, and so wasRich.

“The sea of grief is coming,” he said.On the morning of Dec. 15, Carolynne sat on the

couch with her mom, Kathryn Seigle. Her headlolled back against the cushions and she slipped

often from mid-sentence to sleep. At one point sheasked her mom to crush up a box of gingersnapsshe’d been snacking on.

“They’re going to be my crust,” she said, andwent on to give detailed instructions of how tomake an apple pie.

Later, Kathryn would learn to take Carolynne’sconfusion in stride. At first, though, her face wrin-kled into a pained expression. Her chin dropped toher chest and her gray hair fell around her face,almost hiding a quivering chin, as she rubbed herdaughter’s leg or squeezed her hand.

The confusion came and went intermittently.When it was gone, Carolynne showed more of her-self than she had in months. She woke up from anap on the couch that afternoon to see her mother,younger sister, niece and friend Ellie Duhaimeseated around her and making party plans.

Duhaime asked her who should be on the guestlist. Carolynne joked that no one would come.

“Carolynne, how much longer?” she said mock-ingly, draping her hand dramatically over her fore-head. “It’s been two and a half years!”

The next day, the house filled with dozens of peo-ple: nurses, doctors, former patients, the kids’teachers and friends. Carolynne snuck off fromtime to time to the bathroom to get sick andreturned to smile and laugh, listening to news fromher co-workers and making jokes about her hairloss.

She toasted the crowd, thanking everyone forcoming, and shared the recent news from the doc-tors.

“Doctors are never wrong, as we know,” shesaid, and the nurses laughed the hardest. “We’regoing to play on the side that they are wrong, andkeep on going.”

Sara and Carolynne’s younger sister, LauraCummins, said it was a joy to watch their sister.

“She was funny and very much herself,” Sarasaid. “I was totally impressed with her strength andher ability to connect with every person who camethrough that house.”

But Sara said that the month’s news was diffi-cult to hear, partly because it pushed her to acceptthat her sister’s longevity was limited. And, sheRich helps to fix a transdermal patch used to help control Carolynne’s pain.

Brian Thone, 12

Brian stands outside the bathroom while Carolynne cleans up after a bout of nausea. “I just see so much wear and tear on the family unit,” said Carolynne’s sister Sara.

ST. PIERRE (Continued from A1)

said, she worries about Rich and the chil-dren. “I just see so much wear and tearon the family unit that it makes meintensely sad,” she said.

Late that night, after most of theguests were gone and the family hadopened presents, Melissa sat on thecouch quietly trying to get her new clockradio to work. Brian counted his gifts.

As she had been throughout hermom’s illness, Melissa, who is now 14,remained steady. She found support inher friends and stayed focused on school-work and gymnastics. Although she saidit wasn’t until just before the party thatshe fully realized that her mom wasdying, Rich said she seemed to acknowl-edge the fact more than her brother did.

Brian, 12, had been getting into trou-ble at school. He and Rich argued moreand more at home. Brian said he getsangry that his mom is sick and some-times takes it out on other people.

“It’s kind of like being in football, andyou drop the ball and everyone goes for itand a bunch of people just keep piling ontop of you and it just keeps hurt-ing even more,” he said.

That night, though, Brian saidloudly, for Elijah’s sake, “Thankyou, Santa,” then flung his armsaround Rich’s neck, his feetsplayed out behind him – a hugfrom a little boy, not a troubledpre-teen.

“Yeah,” Rich said quietly.“Just work with me, alright? Justwork with me. I need a partner.”

Later, when the kids wereoccupied with their gifts and theroom filled with chatter, Rich qui-etly watched Carolynne as sheturned her head away, wipingaway a few tears.

“Today was the perfect day,”he said to her, when it was allover. “When I go, I’ll probablyhave, like, four guys and a dog.You’ve got the whole world outhere, and they all love you.”

Memories on filmThe next morning, Carolynne

and Sara inched closer togetheron the daybed in the guest room,trying to fit into the frame of thevideo camera Rich set up a fewfeet away.

Carolynne had been talking formonths about making videos forthe kids, but she was reluctant todo anything that felt like sayinggoodbye. Now she struggledthrough both confusion and emo-tion to answer her sister’s ques-tions. She’d lose her focus andask her to repeat the question.She stopped the recording onceto choke back tears.

Slowly she got through thestory of her first marriage anddivorce, telling Melissa and Brianthat they were the best thing thatcame out of those years. Sheexplained her life as a singlemom, meeting Rich and her diag-nosis. She told the kids they couldask their dad more about it.

“Your real dad in my heart isRich, because he’s the one thathelped Mom raise you guys,” shesaid to the camera. “And he’salways been a rock for Mom.”

In the days that followed, Carolynne’scondition worsened, although she saidrepeatedly that she felt better than ever:She’d been more than two months with-out chemotherapy. Doctors had long toldher that the cancer would move quickly ifshe went two to four months withouteffective treatment.

Her feet were so swollen now that herskin was taut and shiny. Nausea, pain andfatigue increased.

Duhaime and other visitors camedaily. Her sisters traveled home and backagain. Rich often carried Carolynne upand down the stairs. He ordered equip-ment to help with the days when shewould be able to move even less andstashed it in the basement when itarrived. Carolynne didn’t want to see it.

Some things were still too hard toacknowledge.

Carolynne cried when she talkedabout the pain of knowing she won’t bethere for her children. She wouldn’t get tosee Melissa grow up and have her ownfamily. She wouldn’t see Brian through

the difficult times he’s having. She would-n’t be there for Elijah. As they sat togeth-er at the kitchen table on the morning ofChristmas Eve, Rich told her that herlong fight would mean a lot to them.

“But there’s a limit to it,” she said,wiping tears from her eyes. “And that’swhen stuff will hit the fan, and when EJcalls for me, I won’t be here.”

Christmas day was spent with Rich’sfamily and New Year’s Eve was a quietnight at home. Between the two holidays,Carolynne sorted through photographs,picking out a few that she liked of herself.Rich would have them blown up for thefuneral service and later would keepthem around the house.

“This is what I used to look like,” shesaid. With hands so thin that her weddingring hangs loose on its finger, she pulledout a photograph of herself, smilingbehind the rim of a wine glass, her hairlong and blond.

New troublesAfter New Year’s, the St. Pierres were

glad to have outlived yet another doctor’sprediction but anxious about takinganother trip to New York. They’d sched-uled a Jan. 4 appointment with Bruckner,famed for his never-give-up approach.

The fluid in Carolynne’s legs haddiminished slightly and her blood worklooked okay. Bruckner told them theycould try a new chemotherapy regimen.But when Carolynne arrived at the hospi-tal to get treatment, an infection in hersalivary gland had worsened, causing theleft side of her neck to swell. Chemother-apy compromises the immune system.She couldn’t get treatment while she wasalready fighting something off.

The St. Pierres returned to Concord,and Carolynne was admitted on Jan. 5 toConcord Hospital to receive antibioticsby IV. She has been there ever since, onefloor up from the nursery where shecared for hundreds of babies. Rich stopsin with Elijah each morning and evening.Melissa and Brian visit when they can.

Rich scrambles to squeeze in work onhis geospatial surveying business wher-

ever possible. In New York, they took acar service from the hospital to Kathryn’sapartment. Rich asked the driver to pullover, dashed into a nearby Starbucks anddownloaded documents to his laptop sohe could work from the car.

He is now managing two mortgageson the house, and the insurance companyhasn’t yet said whether it will cover acouple of chemotherapy treatments con-sidered experimental. Family membersworry that he could break down from thestress of caring for the kids, Carolynneand the family’s finances.

The night Carolynne was admitted,Rich and his brother had a miscommuni-cation. No one came to pick Melissa upfrom a gymnastics meet. So friendsdropped her off at the hospital.

“It’s really difficult to have to deal withthe parent taking care of the other parentinstead of the parent taking care of thekid,” Melissa said later. “I understand thecircumstances, but it’s just hard.”

Now that her mother is in the hospitaland not home, Melissa said, sometimes it

feels like she’s already gone.Rich said it’s difficult to put Eli-

jah to sleep at night in his bed,which sits next to his parents’, andnot see Carolynne there.

“It’s all kind of eerie,” he said. “Iwant to get her home. I don’t wantto wake up and get a call from thehospital. . . . I don’t expect that, butit’s unsettling right now.”

Last month he started havingpain in his lower back. Blood testsshowed elevated levels on some ofthe same markers doctors watch onCarolynne’s test, including biliru-bin, which monitors liver function.He’s hoping it’s a relatively easy fix,such as a gall bladder issue.

On Thursday afternoon, he hungup the phone at home. Brian hadcalled. He forgot his trumpet andneeded Rich to bring it to school forhim. He had a concert that night.Rich was in the middle of work andhad been trying to figure out how toget to the concert and see Car-olynne that night.

For the first time, he said, he hadthe sensation that he was a drown-ing man.

Carolynne’s hospital stay, herlongest in more than a year, hastaken its toll.

She is weaker and thinner, andshe needs assistance to get out ofbed. Pain in her right shoulder, hasgotten worse. Nurses have to giveher regular massages on theswollen gland that leave her winc-ing in pain.

The swelling has gone down butnot completely, and Carolynne can’tgo home until it does.

One evening this week, Elijahsat propped next to Carolynne inher hospital bed, resting his headon her shoulder, watching cartoonsand eating pizza. Rich bribed himwith candy to sit quietly. He toldCarolynne he picked up the paper-work for Elijah’s kindergartenclass. A wide and toothy smilespread across her face.

“Really?” she said. Dependingon how she feels, she said, she’dlike to help fill it out.

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SEA OF GRIEF SATURDAY, JANUARY 13, 2007 A5CONCORD MONITOR

During a hospital visit, Elijah touches Carolynne’s swollen feet where Melissa had painted her toenails. Fluid buildup was one factor that forced Carolynne to stop chemotherapy.

Rich takes a moment to rest beside Carolynne at Concord Hospital. She was admitted last week because of an infection.

“It’s all kind of eerie.I want to get her home.”

Story by Chelsea Conaboy Photos by Preston Gannaway

Rich St. Pierre