Lesson 1 HBLT: Assignment for week 4

BE COOL, BE CALM, BE COLLECTED

by James R. Andrews

DSMN 601

Good Morning Class...

Let us pray

[Prayer]

Hook:

Show Adam Sandler Jack Nicholson clip “Anger Management Clip” (2 min)

Discussion

Any one ever been angry?

Anybody been angry this week?

Anybody been angry already this morning?

What gets you angry?

Is there anything wrong with being angry?

What do you do when you get angry?

(Rhethorical question) Was how you dealt with your anger proper?

(Narrative)

Any of you have a teen or pre-teen? You know those people who think they know everything, but

don't know how to pay a bill, pump gas, or cook a good hamburger. I have pre-teen daughter

with whom we are working diligently to help her understand that being angry is not an excuse to

act “ugly.” Anger is something that we all personally struggle with to varying degrees. In

addressing this challenge with my daughter we have been working on ways to quell the boiling

that seems to go on within her when something occurs that she does not favor. What we also

point out to her is that her demonstrations of anger generally do not achieve for her the selfish

ends she desires.

Though this is something we struggle with helping my daughter through, we all struggle with anger in

some way?

Road Rage?

Getting angry with poor customer service

What else ticks you offer? Where in our lives does the inclination “act out” continue to pop up?

(Rhetorical Question) How should you deal with your anger?

Jesus spoke of how to deal with matters that may trigger anger, be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to

anger. This may help keep us from allowing those impulses that rear themselves in an ugly fashion

from coming forth.

Transition: Today we are going to discuss if you have not figured it out out …. ANGER... how we should deal with

it, righteous expressions of it verses selfish demonstration.

I struggled with a succinct title for today's lesson but I settled with, “Be Cool, Be Calm, Be Collected.”

BOOK:

Let's go to our text,

Let's do what we like to do, let's go to the Old Testament, then to the New. These passages give us an

idea as to what God wants from us.

A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly (Proverbs 14:29).

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control (Proverbs 29:11).

Based on these Old Testament Proverbs, what does a fool do? He let's his anger take over, he

demonstrates his anger full blast.

What does a wise man do? He keeps his cool, does not let his anger rule him.

Be Cool, Be Calm, Be Collected.

I came up with my top 5 things that happen to people when they let their anger get the best of them.

1. Loss of respect from others, lose friends an associates2. Destruction of marriage, Divorce, separation3. Depression4. Jail5. It rubs of on your kids presents a terrible example

These are all foolish things.

This is a story I borrowed, but it is so right on.

There was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every

time he lost his temper, to hammer a nail in the back fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails

into the fence. Then it gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to

drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and

the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.

Most days he got to pull a nail but some days he had to pound a nail in.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were

gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my

son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger,

they leave a mark just like the nails left a mark in the fence. It won't matter how many times you say

I'm sorry, the wound is still there.

Be Cool, Be Calm, Be Collected.

(Have a student read James 1:19-20)

19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to

anger; 20 for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

26 Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger Eph 4:26

The reverred preacher, Jonathan Edwards had 70 resolutions, three of which dealt with anger

1.  never to suffer the least motions of anger to irrational beings.

2. refrain from an air of dislike, fretfulness, and anger in conversation, but to exhibit an air of love,

cheerfulness and benignity.

3. When I am most conscious of provocations to ill nature and anger, that I will strive most to feel

and act good-naturedly; yea, at such times, to manifest good nature, though I think that in other

respects it would be disadvantageous, and so as would be imprudent at other times. 

These sound like efforts of a wise person.

What do we know about anger? Does God get angry?

Anger and jealousy are frequently attributed to God in the Bible, so we must agree that not all anger

and jealousy are evil. So, if we are to imitate God, then there must be times when we should be angry.

Eph 4:26-28 details righteous anger. What we are going to try to do to day is differentiated between

good and bad anger and how to properly express righteous anger.

Let's begin by looking at biblical examples of anger, specifically God's anger we will follow that by

looking at Jesus' anger, then some of the more righteous individuals we laud in the Bible. We will wrap

this up by contrasting this with the selfish demonstrations of anger we often portray.

God's wrath is not abstract. Of all people, God was angry with Moses because of his disbelief which

deterred him initially from confronting the Pharoah to insist that he let the Children of Israel free. God

was also angered by the mistreatment of the helpless, foreigners, strangers, widows, and the orphans in

Exodus 22. Throughout the Old Testament we are given detail of repeated instances where God was

angered by Israel for turning from trusting and worshipping Him, to the worship of idols, He even

deplored complaining and grumbling which also manifested itself in questioning God as the true god

and leader. God's wrath is not some thing that is inactive and inoperative. Note the Flood, the Plagues

visited upon Egypt, His dealings with the Nation of Israel, in selling them into the hands of their

enemies, sending them into captivity and destroying their beloved city. God's wrath against sin was

publicly manifested at the Cross, when all His billows and waves passed over the head of the blessed

Sin-Bearer, "I am afflicted and ready to die from My youth up: while I suffer Thy terrors I am

distracted. Thy fierce wrath goeth over Me: Thy terrors have cut Me off" (Psalm 138:15, 16) was His

solemn cry.

These instances seem reasonable to my infantile mind, but what about the instances such as

where God turned Lot's wife into a pillar of salt because she turned and looked at Soddamah and

Gommarah as they were being destroyed. He killed Nadab and Abihu, sons of Aaron for offering

strange fire before the alter in Lev 10. He killed Uzzah for touching the ark while attempting to keep it

from falling over as the Israelites were retrieving it from the Phillistines under David's command. In

the New Testament, He killed Ananias and Sapphira for saying they sold their land for less than they

did so that they would not be obligated to put as much into the collection. (Acts 5).

These instances of His wrath are tough to swallow, but what they all have in common was the

unfortunate recipient of God's wrath was disobedient of a direct command of God's in each instance.

God's anger is ALWAYS A JUST REACTION TO EVIL (as clearly pointed out in Ro 1:18-21 18 For

the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who

suppress the truth in unrighteousness, 19 because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for

God has shown it to them. 20 For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly

seen, being understood by the things that are made,even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they

are without excuse, 21 because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were

thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened

Be Cool, Be Calm, Be Collected.

Look:

Jesus we know became angry on at least four occasions.

Q: What were they?

1. We are told of His anger at the Pharisees for their hardness of heart (Mark 3: 1-6 ). When we

look through the gospels we notice that Jesus became angry when He saw indifference to

human suffering. For example, Jesus saw a man with a shriveled hand – so He healed the man.

The Jewish leaders thought it was wrong to heal on the Sabbath. Jesus was angry and deeply

distressed at their stubborn hearts (Mk 3:1-6).

2. That same anger seems to be expressed in the cleansing of the temple (John 2:13-22 ; Mark

11:15-17), Jesus also became angry when He saw the honor of God being abused. When Jesus

saw the temple courts being used as a marketplace where outrageous prices were charged for

exchanging currency and for clean animals to be used in sacrifice, Jesus overturned tables and

drove out the people who were buying and selling (Mk 11:15-17).

3. and in our Lord’s woe’s to the Pharisees in Matthew 23.

4. It is also implied in our Lord’s rebuke of Peter, when he chided Him for speaking of His

sacrificial death (Matthew 16:23).

Notice He did not get angry during his trial, which lead to the worst verdict in history, but he got

angered, when people were dishonoring the Father and not displaying love for one another. As stated

in 1 Peter, 21 To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you

should follow in his steps.

 22 “He committed no sin,    and no deceit was found in his mouth.”[e]

 23 When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.

Brain storming: Students will discuss measures that can be taken to prompt slow to speak, slow to anger and quick to recover; ways to apply the leson. We will build a list and write it out on a white board or other display. Highlight the importance of regular bible study, fellowship, prayer and worship can build the foundation and provide the support necessary to make these steps easier. Be Cool, Be Calm, Be Collected.

Other Men of God depicted as angered by unrighteousness

Moses, was initially disturbed by Israel’s worshiping the the golden calf and became angry

when he finally came down from the mountain and saw the extent of Israel’s sin.

David was angry when Nathan told him the story of the rich man who stole a poor man’s little

lamb, not knowing that he was the villain (2 Samuel 13:21).

Paul was angered by the false teachings of the people in saints in Galatia, and that some were

embracing it. Most of the book of Galatians is an expression of Paul's outrage.

Again men getting angry by others disrespecting God. None of these instances of anger dealt with how

each was personally treated.

Today, how do people disrespect God? Do you get angry?

Be cool, and if you can't be cool, be in control

Take aways?

What are some of the qualities of the anger these men and God display?

1. Each of their anger was based on a violation of God's law/love, and it is an anger that is

lawfully expressed. Godly anger is not vigilante justice, it is legal justice.

For example, is it right for those who abhor gay marriage to display their anger with vicious

verbal and physical attacks.

Simply put, do two wrongs make a right?

2. Godly anger is slowly provoked, it is not short fused. Then the Lord passed by in front of

him and proclaimed, “The Lord, the Lord God, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and

abounding in loving kindness and truth (Exodus 34:6). God warned the wayward Israelites via

prophet after prophecy of they effects of their actions before he unleashed His wrath upon them.

When Israel sinned did God immediately punish them, despite explicitly laying out a

covenant for them to follow, and messengers generation after generation?

What does that tell us about how we should react when someone “messes up”, should

we immediately become incensed, or be patient? [ Discuss]

◦ What does our verse from James tell us?

Simply put, Patience is a virtue.

3. God, nor any of these biblical men, take delight in the expression or the need for an

expression of their anger.

The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you,

not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance 2 Peter 3:9.

If some one does wrong by you, is it okay for you take delight in getting back at them …

“Showing them, that that they cannot get away with doing that to you”

Simply put, Godly anger is not about revenge, which is a self satisfying display of anger,

Godly anger is slow to be evoked. (Remember love is patient).

4. Godly anger is always under control. This is the point of James 1:19-20, don't let your anger

control you, control your anger. Godly anger does not lose its temper. Ungodly anger is excessive and

abusive; godly anger never is.

What do we call out of control anger.?.... rage.

What kinds of rage do we display...... (if no one answers) What kind of rage do other people

display.

Are there any biblical examples of where unwarned, instant reprisal for wrongdoing is

lauded?.... Nope...

Simply, do not allow your anger to get the best of you, as with anything keep a clear head

and heart so as not to allow anger/rage color you actions.

What are some of the big picture issues we face in society because terrible displays of anger?[Discuss]

Divorce, our political systems, ...

Conclusion

Most of our anger is self centered and expression of humanly wrath. This is the antithesis of God's

holy anger. What we must strive to do is rid ourselves of the “manly anger” and exhibit Godly anger.

Slow and God centered.

We can do this by knowing and following this.

If God is angered by sin, then we should be also. If God wants us to be slow to anger....we should be.

We, should be less willing to accommodate sin than we do to condemn it, and to remove it from our

midst. All too often, I see parents—Christian parents—who think of the sinful actions and attitudes of

their children as cute, rather than to be angered by it and to deal with it as God would have us do. This

is another lesson, but this why we are vexed by rebellious children in my house.

But when we are angry, then we should deal just as God would so that our anger is displayed

righteously not sinfully. Next time an anger inducing situation arises, pause before reacting, then if a

response is required ask yourself, how can you respond in a manner that you will not regret later or that

you would be happy to stand before God and discuss.

So what is our goal..

1. Be slow to anger

2. But if do get angry, it should be for acts against the love of man or God.

3. Be slow to act on that anger and if you do eventually act make sure it is in love not rage, hate,

or in violation of God's command for us to love Him and love our brothers and sisters..

Instant reaction when dissed, confronted, or simply in the midst of difficult circumstances is generally

not best. Be patient and measured in your response.

Conclusion: Instant reaction when dissed, confronted, or simply in the midst of difficult circumstances

is generally not best. Be patient and measured in your response.

Show clip from woo sah clip from Bad Boys 2 where character instead of acting out recite woo sah to

quell their instinct to react. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTGdAGPDBpo&feature=related

Be cool, and if you can't be cool, be in control

We: Imagine how beautifully the Christian community would be viewed and how distinct we would be

if we simply acted with patience and ultimately with love instead of anger. Think about how much

more pleasant we would be as a people.

Poem by Robert Wayne Atkins

It is NOT a sin to become angry, upset, or mad.

However, to remain that way is exceedingly bad.

It is not wise to lose self-control and by anger be led,

and to say words that never, ever should have been said.

The best way to deal with anger is to forgive and forget.

Force yourself to calm down before the sun has set.

When you are the object of another person's rage,

Answer meekly and with respect to end their rampage.

Always seek a peaceful solution to all types of anger.

A gentle peacemaker is rarely in any type of danger.

If you control your reactions and seek peace instead,

You will prosper and be blessed and by Grace be led.

Any questions or comments...

I will email all who signed in a copy of the resolutions from Jonathan Edwards.

Let's pray!