HADD Family Support Group

Dr Deirdre Mac Carvill

Kate Carr-Fanning

Carmichael Centre for Voluntary GroupsCarmichael House

North Brunswick Street

Dublin 7

Phone: (01) 874 8349

E-mail: hadd@eircom.net

WWW.HADD.ie

Understanding Anger and Anger

Management

Overview

� What is Anger?

� Triggers for Anger

� Appropriate Anger

� Inappropriate Anger

� Body’s Response to Anger

� Anger and ADHD

� Managing anger from a parent’s perspective

What is Anger?

� A normal adaptive emotion which is the response to certain situations we encounter

Anger

� It’s not having the angry feelings that causes problems but

what you do about it and how you express it

Triggers for Anger

� Confusion

� Perceived disrespectful treatment

� Perceived threat

� Perceived Unfairness

� Perceived Provocation

Anger

� It is the behavioural response to anger that determines whether it is appropriate or inappropriate

When is Anger Appropriate?

� People get angry, sort it out relatively quickly and then resume their normal state of equilibrium

When is Anger Inappropriate?

� When dealing with angry feelings is more of a problem

than what caused the anger in the first place

Stupid Angry Stuff !

� Stupid stuff that makes you angry

Body’s Internal Response to Anger

� Extra adrenaline is secreted

� Heart beats more rapidly and blood pressure rises

� Breathing becomes faster

� Blood is diverted from liver, intestines and stomach to the

heart, central nervous system and the muscles

� Cortisol production is increased depressing the immune

system

� Men have an increasing supply of testosterone

Internal Feelings of Anger

� Energy and warmth

� An urge to shout and move quickly and forcefully

External Manifestations of Anger

� Rapid breathing, eyes open widely with dilated pupils

� Facial colour reddening or going pale

� Louder voice and quicker speech

� Movements quicker and our muscles tense

Anger

� This state of heightened arousal puts a great strain on the

body and while it is useful as a short term emergency

response it is not ideal as a long term emotional and

physical state

Supressed Anger

� This can result in feelings of anger being suppressed. This

in turn creates high levels of internal stress that can be

manifested in unhealthy coping behaviours such as self-

harm, alcohol or substance misuse

Anger

� Heightened levels of tension in someone can have someone in a

primed state for anger nearly all the time.

� It is reinforced by their negative interpretation of the things that

happen to them

� Always just beneath the surface ready to explode

� Very easily get themselves into conflict situations which then

reinforces their negative interpretations

� They are highly stressed over time and increase the risk of physical

and mental health problems

Stupid Anger Responses!

� Stupid stuff you did when you were angry

Anger and Children with ADHD

� Moods change very quickly and emotional reactions can

easily be provoked

� Heightened state of arousal gets attributed to feelings of

anger even if it isn’t

� Low tolerance for frustration and low feelings of self

esteem expressed outwardly

� Sometimes children experience difficulties when their

medication wears off resulting in tantrums

� ADHD children’s impulsivity may lead to their

responding to feeling of anger with aggression

Managing Anger from Parent’s

Perspective� Find positive outlets for anger – strenuous outdoor play and exercise

� Limit television and video games - children with impulse control problems may be more easily influenced by the aggressive reactions they see

� Set up clear rules and enforce rules consistently

� Control yourself – make a conscious decision to stay calm. Take responsibility for your own anger. Its never ok to excuse your own behaviour because of your anger.

� Assume a calm posture – “Do I want a conversation or a confrontation?”

� Have self respect – don’t give in to or join the pity party

� Take care of yourself

� Be the calm in the storm –

Managing Anger from Parent’s

Perspective

� Talk to child about what they are feeling and give them different labels for what these feelings are

� Get down to their eye level as you are talking to them

� Be sympathetic about the fact the child is having such difficulty controlling their anger. Its awful you have this problem its not ok you behave this way so what do we need to do to deal with this.

� Create an awareness in the child of the impact of their behaviour