ACADEMIC ENGLISH III Class 23 May 31, 2013. Today Improving Writing Clarity - Pronoun agreement and...

ACADEMIC ENGLISH IIIClass 23

May 31, 2013

Today

Improving Writing Clarity

- Pronoun agreement and reference

- Nominalization

Read these sentencesTo prevent children from sucking their thumbs, some parents put them in Tabasco sauce.

Pearl Buck received much critical praise for her work and earned over $7 million, but she was very modest about it.

Bill bought a Norwegian boat because he had heard that they make the best boats.

After jack put his computer on the table, it broke.

Don’t worry if the stock market is down. They say that fluctuations are natural and won’t hurt your long-term investments.

Terms to keep in mind

Pronoun = a part of language that substitutes for nouns or noun phrases.

i.e., it, she, he, they, mine, yours, we, them…

Antecedent = the word or phrase to which a pronoun refers.

i.e., Debbie told Andrew that she was sick.

Pronoun reference errors

When the antecedent in a sentence or paragraph is unclear, the meaning of the sentence or paragraph can be confusing.

This problem negatively affects writing clarity.

Obviously, something you want to avoid!

Pronoun reference errorsCommon unclear pronoun references:

1. More than one possible antecedent

i.e.,

To prevent children from sucking their thumbs, some parents put them in Tabasco sauce.

Jack told Frank he wasn’t going to get the job.




- The children or the thumbs?


- Who wasn’t going to get the job? Jack or Frank?



When the hotel staff mistakenly booked two wedding parties at the same time, neither of the bride's families would agree to be relocated. The situation was embarrassing for them.

- Embarrassing for who? The hotel staff, the families, or the brides?

Fixing pronoun reference errors

There are 2 strategies to fix pronoun reference errors:

1. Use a specific word instead of the pronoun.


Jack told Frank that Frank wasn’t going to get the job.



2. Completely revise the sentence.


Jack told Frank, “You aren’t going to get the job.”



1. Use a specific word instead of the pronoun.


To prevent children from sucking their thumbs, some parents put their baby’s thumb in Tabasco sauce.



2. Completely revise the sentence.


Some parents put their baby’s thumb in Tabasco sauce to prevent thumb sucking.


2. The antecedent is only implied

i.e.,

One of the engineers on NASA's team forgot to translate a mathematical formula into metric, causing the satellite to veer off its orbit. This was a disaster for the team.

- The use of “this” is what caused the problem.

- Do not use “this” without a clarifying noun afterwards.

i.e., “This mistake was a disaster for the team.” “This change of course was a disaster for the team.”


2. The antecedent is only implied

i.e.,

One of the engineers on NASA's team forgot to translate a mathematical formula into metric, causing the satellite to veer off its orbit. This was a disaster for the team.

One of the engineers on NASA's team forgot to translate a mathematical formula into metric, causing the satellite to veer off its orbit. This mistake was a disaster for the team.

Pronoun reference errorsI majored in banking, but I don’t want to work in one.

I majored in banking, but I won’t want to work in a bank.

My brother never asks for directions, which really annoys me.

My brother never asks for directions, a habit which really annoys me.

In Tokyo they eat a lot of fish.

People in Tokyo eat a lot of fish.

It says in the paper that the city council will approve the budget.

The paper says that the city council will approve the budget.

Read these sentencesTo prevent children from sucking their thumbs, some parents put them in Tabasco sauce.

Pearl Buck received much critical praise for her work and earned over $7 million, but she was very modest about it.

Bill bought a Norwegian boat because he had heard that they make the best boats.

After jack put his computer on the table, it broke.

Don’t worry if the stock market is down. They say that fluctuations are natural and won’t hurt your long-term investments.


1. When Frank accidentally walked into the ladies' bathroom, they burst out laughing.

2. If the guests are finished with the appetizers, put them in the refrigerator.

3. When I opened the doors of the pigeon cages, most of them flew away.

4. It says in our English textbook that pronouns should refer clearly to their antecedents.


5. At the company where I work, they don't allow smoking even outside the building.

6. If the test is postponed until Monday, it will give more time to study.

7. With my experience caring for my autistic younger brother, it has prepared me for a job in Special Education.

8. There was a traffic accident at the intersection of Broad St. and Seventh Avenue, which caused me to be late for class.


10. Community service not only looks good on a resume; it also gives you a sense of satisfaction.

Nominalization

Turning a verb into a noun.

- We implemented the plan successfully

- The implementation of the plan was successful.

Try to avoid this as much as possible.

Nominalization

The detective conducted an investigation of the crime.

The hope of the student is to earn good grades.

There was flooding in the building by heavy rains.

A ski trip should be planned.

Nominalization

Problems created by nominalization:

- Passive voice

- Unnecessary words

- loss of agent

- use of “be” verbs as main verb

- loss of clarity.

Revising Nominalization

Look for:

1. Verbs turned into nouns (i.e., investigate investigation)

2. The use of “to be” verbs (am, is, are, was, were) as a main verb.

3. The use of passive voice.

4. A missing agent.


1. Verbs turned into nouns (i.e., investigate investigation)

- Locate verbs functioning as nouns and change them to action words.

i.e.,

The detective conducted an investigation of the crime.

The detective investigated the crime.


2. The use of “to be” verbs (am, is, are, was, were) as a main verb.

Replace simple “to be” verbs with more “action-oriented” verbs.

i.e.,

The hope of the student is to earn good grades.

The student hopes to earn good grades.


3. The use of passive voice.

- Switch to active voice.

i.e.,

There was flooding in the building by heavy rains.

Heavy rains flooded the building.


4. A missing agent.

Provide an agent by indicating who or what is doing the action in the sentence.

i.e.,

A ski trip should be planned.

Jim should plan our ski trip.


1. The budget cuts for the Writing Center were the topic of our debate.

2. The intention of the jury is to reach a decision.

3. There is a need for reinforcement of this law.

4. We did a study of the progression of lung cancer.


5. The delay of the flight was caused by the storm.

6. There was scorching of vegetation by the 2007 fires in Morgan Hill.

7. Our presentation was about a new regulation.

8. It was expected that our collection of data would be quick.


9. The coroner did an examination of the body.

10. A demand must exist for clean energy

ACADEMIC ENGLISH III Class 23 May 31, 2013. Today Improving Writing Clarity - Pronoun agreement and...

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