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Mistress Scrubb

PROPS

Flagon of ale

The Gower Wassail

Scrubb: 1st Verse

A-wassail, a-wassail throughout of this town

Our cup it is white and our ale it is brown

Our wassail is made of good ale and cake

Of nutmeg and ginger, the best we can bake

Al dal di dal di dal

Dal di dal di dal

Dal di dal di dee

Sing deero, sing daddy

Sing too ral di do

Our wassail is made of the el'berry boughAlthough my good neighbors I'll drink unto thou

Besides all on earth, we have apples to store

Pray let us come in for its cold by the door

We know by the moon that we are not too soon

And we know by the sky that we are not too high

We know by the star that we are not too far

And we know by the ground that we are within sound

Now master and mistress let your company forbear

To fill up are wassail with you cider and beer

We want none of your pale beer, nor none of your small

But a drop of your kilderkin, that's next to the wall

Now master and mistress if you are within

Pray send out your maid with her lily-white skin

For to open the door without more delay

For our time it is precious and we cannot stay

You've brought your wassail, which is very well known

But I can assure you we've as good of our ownAs for your jolly wassail, we care not one pin

But its for your good company we'll let you come in

Here's a health to our Cooley and her croo'ed horn

May God send her Master a good crop of corn

Of barley and wheat and all sorts of grain

May God send her Mistress a long life to reign

Now Master and Mistress, know you will give

Unto our jolly wassail as long as you live

And if we do life to another new year

We'll call in again just to see who lives here

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Scrubb [Holding up a flagon of ale, and flirts]

Fancy some, Mr Scrooge?

Scrooge I fancy my rent, Mistress Scrubb.

Scrubb Just a matter of time, Mr Scrooge.

Scrooge No, just a matter ofmoney, Mistress

Scrubb.

Pocket What about a chestnut warm the

cockles of your eart, Mr Scrooge?

Scrooge You are making two assumptions

mister Pocket. [Pulls out a small black

book and a pencil from behind his ear;

opens it] Firstly, that I might desire achestnut. Secondly, that I might have

a heart. Neither is true.

Scrubb Oh, you are a one, Mr Scrooge!

Scrooge [Simply gives her a withering glance]

Scrubb [Waves the flagon in front of her

uncomfortably, takes a swig and turns

away]

Pocket Ave a couple on the ouse Mr Scrooge!

Scrooge [Looks back at the black book] And

forget the debt you owe me, Mister

Pocket? [Shakes head] Your debt

grows ever larger, sir. Pay up lest it

devour you!

Pocket But its Christmas, Mr Scrooge

Molasses Good will to all men!

Scrooge Good will to all men who pay their

debts, Mr Molasses. And you can pay

up before the New Year or itll be the

bailiffs for you!

Molasses But its Christmas

Scrooge Humbug!

PROPS

Black debt book

PROPS

Stove

Chestnuts

[Punches him on the

arm]

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Molasses [Raising a basket of humbugs] Oh, do

you fancy a humbug then, Mr Scrooge?

Scrooge [Raises arm as turns away] Bah!

Molasses Best of the Season to you Mr Scrooge!

Scrooge [Waves him away] The New Year,

Molasses, the New Year.

Tiny Tim [Enters USL, passing Scrooge who is

still studying his book, glancing

around occasionally] May I have a

humbug, Mr Molasses, sir. I have a

farthing.

Molasses A farthing is it? A humbug? Onehumbug. Why with a farthing, you can

have a family bag!

Tiny Tim Oh, thank you, thank you, Mr

Molasses. Papa will be so pleased!

[Tiny Tim leaves, limping]

Scrooge [Scrooge approaches Molasses] No

wonder youre in debt, Mr Molasses.

Theres no profit in charity, sir. Noprofit!

Molasses I know how hard it is to keep a family

alive, Mr Scrooge.

Scrooge [Walks away and turns] New Year,

Molasses, New Year!

Crowd [Leaves USR, talking animatedly.]

Scrooge [EntersUSR,walkingpurposefully CSL]

Welp [Enters USR, Hurries after Scrooge, hands

clasped together] Mr Scrooge, sir! Mr

Scrooge!

Scrooge [Turns, annoyed; looks at pocket

watch] Welp! What is it man? Do you

have the rent you owe me?

Welp Well, no sir. Hard times, Mr Scrooge, hard

PROPS

Tables for the

different stalls

Bags of humbugs

[SCROOGE notices

the transaction and

shakes his head]

[Leaves USL to walk

round to enter on

USR]

PROPS

Pocket watch

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Scrooge Hard times for us all, Mr Welp. Your

problems are no concern of mine.

My concern is my profit. If you cannot

pay, then youll be turned out.

Welp But what about Mrs Welp? And little

Serafina and Young Philip?

Scrooge What about them, Mr Welp? They are

your concern, not mine. Perhaps you

should vacate the property at once

the workhouses are particularly full at

this time of year. You may want to

ensure that you have a place. Now,

good evening to you. [Scrooge moves

away USL]

Welp [Pawing at Scrooge] But Mr Scrooge, I beg

of you.

Scrooge [Sharply, and shrugging him off] Good

evening to you, sir.