Chunyan Shao (Shandong University)

To write a paragraph To find a good topic sentence To provide good support To provide a good conclusion

A good paragraph has three parts: Topic sentence Developing/supporting sentence Concluding sentence A good paragraph has two elements Unity Coherence

complete sentence not too general, not too narrow usually the first sentence state the main idea but not the

details It states the topic and the

controlling ideas

Better topics?

1. American food is terrible 2. American food is tasteless and greasy because of canned, frozen, and prepackaged foods

3. American food is tasteless and greasy

4. I love city life 5. Cities attract me for their colorful cultural activities

Two parts of a topic sentence The topic names the subject of the

paragraph. The controlling idea limits or controls the

topic to a specific area that you can discuss in the space of a single paragraph.E.g.

Convenience food are easy to prepare. Immigrants have contributed many

delicious foods to U.S. cuisine.

Controlling ideas

Independent films are characterized by experimental techniques, low production costs, and provocative themes.

A topic sentence should not have controlling ideas that are unrelated.

Independent films are characterized by experimental techniques.

Exercises: Topic and controlling ideas

1. Driving on free ways requires skill and alertness. 2. The Caribbean island of Trinidad attracts tourists

because of its calypso music. 3. Special beaches make Puerto Rico a tourist

paradise. 4. Moving away from home can be a stressful

experience for young people. 5. Participiting in class discussions is a problem for

several different groups of students. 6. It is an expensive luxury to own an automobile in

a large city.

Description Exemplification Cause-to-effect Comparison &contrast Classification… Public behaviour of sports figures is a poor

example for our youth. Q: Why do you say that? What is your evidence? Name some examples to prove your

points.

Each paragraph, only one idea

A new idea, a new paragraph.

Every supporting sentence should be directly related to the main idea.

Progress is gradually being made in the fight against cancer. In the early 1990s, few cancer patients had any hope for long term survival. But because of advances in medical technology, progress has been made so that currently one in three cancer patients survived. It has been proven that smoking is a direct cause of lung cancer. However the battle has not been won. Although cures for some forms of cancer has been discovered, other forms of cancer are still increasing. Heart disease is also increasing.

In order to have coherence in writing, the movement from one sentence to the next must be logical and smooth ,there must be no sudden jumps.

Transitional signals

Lily is an interesting girl. Lily is a humorous girl. Everybody hates Lily. John does not like Lily. Lily seldom talks with John.

Hiking in the mountains can be very dangerous.

Write down whatever comes to your mind on a piece of paper.

Complete sentences, Phrases, Key words, Pictures, Charts, Tables

Anything that can help you with the topic

Now based on free-writing, decide on three points you would like to include in your paragraph.

Now pls. draw an outline of what you are going to write.

15 minutes for discussion

Hiking in mountains is dangerous

Outline Outline

Roads food

weather loneliness

lost animals

Dangerous people

No friends

alone insects

Alone road Animals Lost Weather Dangerous people

Hiking in mountains dangerous loneliness insects Traps undiscovered danger

Hiking in mountains is dangerous

Outline Outline

Roads Steep, rugged food No enough

weather Changingwhimsical

loneliness Miss friends

lost No way out animals threat

Dangerous people

Potential danger

No friends loneliness

alone Loneliness, cannot cope with dangers

insects Bite, snakes,…

Pls. write a 4-sentence paragraph explaining why it is dangerous to hike in the mountains.

The first is given to you as the topic sentence.

1. Hiking in the mountains can be very dangerous.

2. …… 3. …… 4. ……

Topic Sentence (Main Idea)Supporting Detail 1Supporting Detail 2Supporting Detail 3

Hiking on the Appalachian Trail can be very dangerous. Hungry bears will be searching for food. When it rains, the trail—which is very steep at some points—becomes slippery. Severe weather develops quickly.

Making a choice

Choose the points that you are most familiar with.

Do not include so much so that you cannot handle.

We are not supposed to exhaust the details.

Something to avoid…

Firstly Secondly, Thirdly…

It is not a recipe and we are not making a list!

There are other ways to achieve the same goal.

Hiking on the Appalachian Trail can be very dangerous. One reason is that hungry bears will be searching for food. Another reason is when it rains, the trail—which is very steep at some points—becomes slippery. A third reason is that severe weather develops quickly.

Now pls. add or change the transitional signals to your writing to make it more coherent, if necessary.

Now pls. write a 7-sentence paragraph explaining why it is dangerous to hike in the mountains.

Use the same points of your first writing. Explain why the points you have listed

can support “it is dangerous to hike…”.

Hiking on the Appalachian Trail can be very dangerous.

One reason is that hungry bears may be searching for food.______________.

Another reason is when it rains, the trail—which is very steep at some points—becomes slippery.________________________.

A third reason is that severe weather develops quickly. _______________.

Topic Sentence (Main Idea)

Supporting Detail 1 Relevance to the topic

Supporting Detail 2 Relevance to the topic

Supporting Detail 3 Relevance to the topic

Hiking on the Appalachian Trail can be very dangerous.

One reason is that hungry bears may be searching for food. They pose a threat to the hikers.

Another reason is when it rains, the trail—which is very steep at some points—becomes slippery. It is very likely that the hikers slip and fall into the valleys.

A third reason is that severe weather develops quickly, and the hikers may be exposed to storm and cold.

Now pls. revise your 7-sentence paragraph to explicitly explain the relevance of your evidence to the topic.

Topic Sentence (Main Idea) Supporting Detail 1

Relevance to the topicSupporting Detail 2

Relevance to the topicSupporting Detail 3

Relevance to the topic Closing Sentence

Hiking on the Appalachian Trail can be very dangerous.

One reason is that hungry bears may be searching for food.______________.

Another reason is when it rains, the trail—which is very steep at some points—becomes slippery.________________________.

A third reason is that severe weather develops quickly. _______________.

(Closing Sentence)_______________________.

Now pls. conclude your paragraph with one or two sentences.

A concluding sentence serves two purposes:

1. signals the end of the paragraph

2. leaves the reader with the most important ideas to remember

1. summarize the main points of the paragraph.

2. repeat the topic sentence in different words.

Lastly, Therefore, Thus, Finally, In brief, Indeed, In short, In conclusion, To sum up, In summary At last

The evidence suggests that … These examples show that … We can see that ... In these respects… In this sense… According to those information…

Native people create legends to explain unusual phenomena in their environment. A legend from the Hawaiian island of Kauai explains how the naupaka flower, a flower that grows on beaches there, got its unusual shape. The flower looks like half a small daisy-there are petals on one side only. The legend says that the marriage of two young lovers on the island was opposed by both sets of parents. The parents found the couple together on a beach one day, and to prevent them from being together,

one of the families moved to the mountains, separating the young couple forever. As a result, the naupaka flower separated into two halves; one half moved to the mountains, and the other half stayed near the beach. This story is a good example of a legend invented by native people to interpret the world around them.

Never introduce a new idea in the concluding sentence.

In conclusion, hiking on the trails is dangerous, but it can also be full of fun. (This is a new idea~)

In conclusion, there are many other legends like this one in Hawaii. (This is a new idea.)

Hiking on the Appalachian Trail can be very dangerous.

One reason is that hungry bears may be searching for food. They pose a threat to the hikers.

Another reason is when it rains, the trail—which is very steep at some points—becomes slippery. It is very likely that the hikers slip and fall into the valleys.

A third reason is that severe weather develops quickly, and the hikers may be exposed to storm and cold.

(Closing Sentence) Therefore, hiking on the Appalachian Trail one faces danger from the animals, the trail and the weather change. It is perilous to hike there.

Now pls. revise your conclusion and rewrite your whole paragraph.

Modify your writing Now based on your last writing, write a 5-

sentence paragraph explaining why it is dangerous to hike in the mountains.

Do not omit any information in your previous writing.

A modified paragraph Hiking on the Appalachian Trail can be very

dangerous. One reason is that hungry bears may be

searching for food, thus posing a threat to the hikers.

Another reason is when it rains, the trail— very steep at some points—becomes slippery, in which case the hikers are very likely to slip and fall into the valleys.

A third reason is that severe weather develops quickly, and may expose the hikers to storm and cold.

Therefore, hiking on the Appalachian Trail one might be challenged by the animals, the trail and the weather change, all of which contribute to the peril of hiking there.

Now pls. compare your fist writing with the final one.

Write down what you have learned in this writing.

Topic sentence: two parts Supporting sentences Relevance Concluding sentence