Stress Management For Every Type

Carol Sommerfield, Ph.D., PMP, SPHR,GCDF

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What We’ll Cover

• Stress and Temperament Related Stress • Personality and stress triggers • Stress management techniques by type • Tips and tricks to help us get through the

holidays in a blissful state.

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Utilizing personality type helps us better:

• reduce stress • recognize the signs of stress in ourselves and

others • manage a stressful reaction

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What is Temperament?

“Temperament determines behavior because behavior is the instrument for getting us what we must have.” (Keirsey and

Bates, 1978) • Clusters of behavioral activity patterns • Inborn • Constant • Drives Behavior • Dynamic • Influencing, Not Limiting

What is Temperament Related Stress?

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• Results from not getting core needs and values met

• It is worse when it is unconscious • Knowledge of one’s temperament pattern can help

and even prevent such stress Linda Berens

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meeting our needs effectively…

Reducing and managing stress comes down to

Personality and Stress • Each temperament perceives and

unconsciously reacts to stress differently.

• Under stress people try to get their needs met.

• The presenting behavior is often irrational and ineffective, ironically increasing stress.

• The only way to get back in balance is to understand which of our core needs are not being met and attempting to meet that need(s).

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What’s Your Temperament?

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The Four Temperaments

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Rationals, Theorist, NT, Consciousness, ~10% (INTJ, ENTJ, INTP, ENTP)

Artisans, Improviser, SP, Dominance, ~40% (ISTP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)

Idealists, Catalyst, NF, Influence, ~10% (INFJ, ENFJ, INFP, ENFP)

Guardians, Stabilizer, SJ, Steadiness, ~40% (ISTJ, ESTJ, ISFJ, ESFJ)

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Rationals, Theorist, NT, Consciousness, ~10%

Our great thinkers, visionaries and analysts

Versatile, Inventive, Competent, Rational Curious, Conceptual, Knowledgeable, Seeking Theoretical, Ingenious, Analyzing, Designing Determined, Complex, Composed Philosophical, Principled, Critical Thinking

Competence, quality, expertise, challenge

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Idealists, Catalyst, NF, Influence, ~10%

Our great harmonizers, communicators, energizers

Authentic, Harmonious, Compassionate Unique, Empathetic, Communicative Warm, Devoted, Poetic Tender, Inspirational, Dramatic Vivacious, Affectionate, Sympathetic

Harmony, meaning, authenticity

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Guardians, Stabilizer, SJ, Steadiness, ~40%

Our great pillars of organizations & society

Traditional, Responsible, Practical Conventional, Conservative Sensible, Dependable, Loyal Organized, Procedural, Orderly Concerned, Cooperative, Caring

Responsible, loyal, dependable, structured

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Artisans, Improviser, SP, Dominance, ~40%

Our great action-oriented improvisers

Active, Opportunistic, Spontaneous Competitive, Impetuous, Impactful Realistic, Open-Minded, Adventuresome Daring, Impulsive, Fun Exciting, Courageous, Skillful

Impact, results, autonomy/freedom

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The Four Temperaments

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Mastery Self-Control Knowledge Competence

Powerlessness Incompetence Poor quality Lack of knowledge

Freedom to act Needs of the moment Make an impact Excitement Act quickly Practicality

Boredom Routine Constraint No impact Loss of control

Meaning/Significance Unique identity Harmony Purpose Potential

Insincerity Betrayal Lack of Integrity Conflict Rejection

Membership Belonging Responsibility Duty Contribution Structure

Not belonging Abandonment Insubordination No security Loss of stability Unpredictability

RATIONALS (NT) ARTISANS (SP)

IDEALISTS (NF) GUARDIANS (SJ)

Rationals (Theorists, NT, DiSC) Stress Trigger Examples Stress Signs Stress Reducers

• Failure • Viewed/feel incompetent • Not meeting high self

standards • Working with others who

are inexperienced or incompetent

• Physical exhaustion • Strong emotional

expression in self/others • Unable to deliver quality

• Replays perceived failures • Risk adverse • Nit-picks – obsesses • Perfectionistic • Engages in unnecessary

debate • Takes up air time,

becomes long winded • May intellectualize, use

sarcasm, or dismiss others as illogical

• Digs in heals • Outbursts • Becomes ritualistic • May feel persecuted • Obsesses about problems

Focus on competence & challenge • Build competence • Intellectual challenge • Refocus to other areas • Autonomy • Opportunities for success &

mastery • A new project/quick project • Disengage • Play/putter • Speak to a trusted counsel • Quiet support from others • Time alone/rebalance • Meet physical needs

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Idealists (Catalysts, NF, DiSC) Stress Trigger Examples Stress Signs Stress Reducers

• No meaning/ purpose in task or situation

• Betrayal, phoniness • Disappointment • Conflict • Not true to themselves • Pain of others • Loss of identity • Rejection • Feeling overwhelmed • Lack of trust • Loss of hope • Detailed work • Over committing • No appreciation • Values violated

• Disconnects from others • Muscle/sensory issues • Jumps from one topic to

another - off course • Uses selective

interpretation • Gets upset with little

things and makes biting comments

• Becomes inauthentic • Overgeneralizes • Suspicious • Act differently

Focus on meaning & purpose • See big picture • Be true to themselves • Frame situation as a

growth experience • Provide a reality check • Review contributions • Positive feedback • Reduce conflict • Solitude/meditation • Journaling • Exercise • Kindness/support • New project/endeavor • Positive environment

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Guardians (Stabilizer, SJ, DiSC) Stress Trigger Examples Stress Signs Stress Reducers

• Fear a loss of security or stability

• Feel they can’t say “no” • Feel they are not

needed • Too much

work/commitments • Challenges to their

authority • Disrespect • Being late/off schedule • No appreciation • Inability to complete

tasks • Lack of

control/structure

• Focuses on why things will not work

• Uses“shoulds” & “ought tos”

• Doesn’t ask for help • Blames & complains • Self-critical • Worries and forecasts

doom • Becomes sick • Catastrophizes • Risk adverse • Critical/excessively

logical • Hypersensitive • Obsesses with detail

Focus on inclusion, self-care, security • Find new groups • Use “I” messages • Reduce overload • Provide security • Self-care • Identify concrete

achievements • Play • Cut back on

responsibilities • Lower expectations • Healthy living • Accept inability to

control

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Artisans (Improvisors, SP, DiSC) Stress Trigger Examples Stress Signs Stress Reducers

• Boredom • Too many rules • Lack of freedom • Not seeing concrete

results • Unable to make an

impact • Redundancy • Waiting • Out of control • High structure • Excessive focus on

future • Excessive criticism • Early starting

• Competes for attention • Uses behavior to get

noticed • Severe procrastination • Unhappy • Hypersensitie • Stirs things up • Lash out at others • Revenge • Binging • Attacking themselves

Focus on action & results • Short-term success • Do something fun/

exciting/challenging • Begin something

creative, concrete and competitive

• Learn “cool tools” • Restore freedom • Be in action • Physical and emotional

space • Set priorities • Physical activity • Validate feelings

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Remember

• Stress in individuals can be managed • Knowing temperament and the associated

needs can help you understand and redirect behavior

• Know and manage your own stress

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STRESS REDUCTION – TIPS AND TRICKS

For the holidays and beyond

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7 Universal Stress Busters

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1- Take a deep breath

2- Laughter

3- Exercise and let it out

4- Go on Holiday for a minute

5- Relax

6- Do Desk Aerobics

7- Put it in perspective/reality test

Holiday Stress Reducers

• Be realistic • Set aside differences • Set a budget • Learn to say ‘no’ • Maintain healthy habits, schedule workouts • Set priorities

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Questions????

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carol.sommerfield@gmail.com 914 693-5815 www.frogsleapconsulting.com

and stress free

References (page 1of 2)

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Berens, Linda V. and Nardi, Dario. (1990). The 16 Personality Types: Descriptions for self-discovery. Los Angeles, CA: Radiance House. Brinkman, Rick and Kirschner, Rick. (2002). Dealing With People You Can’t Stand: How to bring out the best in people at their worst. New York: McGraw-Hill. Delunas, Eve. (1992). Survival Games Personalities Play. Self published. Golding, William. Lord of the Flies. Kiersey, D. and Bates, M. (1995). Please Understand Me. Del Mar, CA: Prometheus Nemesis Book Company. Kummerow, J.M., Barger, N. J., Kirby, L.K. (1997). Work Types: Understand your work personality-how it helps you and holds you back, and what you can do to understand it, New York: Warner Books. Quenk, Naomi L. (2002). Was That Really Me? How everyday stress brings out our hidden personalities. Mountain View, CA: Davies Black.

Copyright 2013, Frog’s Leap Consulting, LLC. Use only with permission.

References (page 2 of 2)

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Lowry, Don. (nd) True Colors. Riverside, CA: True Colors Nash, Susan. (2009). Let’s Split The Difference: Your guide to clarifying the differences between similar types. Marlow Bucks, UK: EM-Power.

Quenk, Naomi L. (2000). In The GRIP Understanding Type, Styress, and the Inferior Function. Mountain View, CA: CPP, Inc.