TERAPROOF:User:jaycarcioneDate:11/03/2010Time:15:11:21Edition:12/03/2010ExaminerLiveXX1203Page: 19Zone:XX1

19FEATUREIrish ExaminerFriday 12.03.2010

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And it isn’t just our physical well-beingwe neglect as we scoff a jaffa cake forlunch. Many mothers also neglect theirmental and emotional well-being, rarelyfinding time to relax, unwind or indulgein some much needed mental TLC.

Hazel Larkin with her daughters, Kashmira (5½) and8-year-old Ishthara Picture: Maura Hickey

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5 WAYS TOPAMPERYOURSELF

Ten ways to treat her on Sunday

Clockwise from above: enjoying a dip at Monart Spa, Co Wexford; hiking onone of Ireland’s many accessible trails; shopping at Kildare Village Outlet.

Is the mum inyour life sick

of slippers andflowers?Pól Ó

Conghailehas ideas for

a day outshe’ll reallyappreciate

DIGGING THE GARDEN TRAIL

Does your mother have green fin-gers? If so, you’re spoiled for choice.Ireland’s gardens start to come intotheir own in spring — from the daf-fodils at Carlow’s Delta SensoryGardens to the rhododendrons andcamellias in bloom at Mount Usherin Wicklow. In Clonakilty, theRobinsonian gardens laid out alongthe Argideen River at Lisselan estateare pure fairytale.

Details: Entry to Mount Usher(0404-40205, mountushergardens.ie)costs 7.50; Delta Sensory Gardens(0599143527, deltacentre.org) 5;and Lisselan (023-33249;lisselan.com) 6.

LET’S DO LUNCH

Lunch is the new dinner. So whynot take mum for a buffet banquetat Aghadoe Heights? The Kerryfive-star has a Mother’s Day lunchspecial including a glass of bubblesand a surprise gift and, if you fancygoing the extra mile, you can up-grade to an overnight stay.

Details: Aghadoe Heights(064-6631766; aghadoeheights.com)has this lunch for 45. Upgrade tothe overnight package, including atoken gift and spa treatment for195pps.

SHOP TILL YOU DROP

You don’t need a credit card for aheart to enjoy Kildare Outlet Vil-lage. The shopping outpost (at junc-tion 13 on the M7) is stuffed full ofbrands like Reiss, Wolford and L.K.Bennett. If you want to stay nearby,Barberstown Castle has a Mother’sDay special that includes a trip toKildare Village with a stylist.

Details: Kildare Village (kildare-village.com); Barberstown Castle(01-6288157, barberstowncastle.ie)has its two-night Mother’s Daypackage from 295pps.

MOLLYCODDLINGMUM-TO-BE

Is there a mum-to-be in yourfamily? Monart Spa in Enniscor-thy, Co Wexford, has a wholesuite of treatments for expectantmothers. They include a full-bodymassage, a pregnancy stone mas-sage and a water lily float.The latter is a cooling body

wrap performed on a dry flotationbed, and evokes a feeling of totalweightlessness.

Details: Monart (053-9238999,monart.ie) has this full-body mas-sage for 85, the pregnancy stonemassage for 120 and the waterlily wrap for 100. All three last55 minutes.

PUT YOUR BESTFOOT FORWARD

Ireland’s network of walkingtrails has improved immeasurablyover the last decade, so if yourmum is footloose and fancy-free,what about a Mother’s Day stroll?From calf-busting circuits likeCork’s Sheep’s Head Loop to thescenic wow of Connemara’s Dia-mond Hill loop, there’s somethingfor everyone.

Details: Walking routes ondiscoverireland.ie/walking.

KITCHEN CONFIDENTIAL

If your mum likes cooking,Mother’s Day is the ideal excuse

to unleash her inner Nigella. PaulFlynn’s Tannery Cookery Schoolin Dungarvan is a funky,state-of-the-art teaching space.This weekend, it’s ‘StunningSeafood’. Next weekend, it’s‘Paul’s Family Cooking’.

Details: The Tannery CookerySchool (058-45420, tannery.ie)Stunning Seafood course is 280.Paul’s Family Cooking is 150.

TAKE ME TO THE ISLAND

As the weather picks up, Ire-land’s coastline is starting to looktempting again. But what abouttaking mum a step further, for aspot of island-hopping? You’respoiled for choice in west Cork.

Garinish is a magical island gardencosseted away in Glengarriff Har-bour. Heir Island has a wonder-ful cottage cookery school,and Cape Clear will shortlyopen its first looped walk.

Details: Glengariff toGarinish (027-63116,garinishislandfer-ries.com); Cunnamore toHeir Island(086-8092447; camproar-ingwater.com). Baltimore toCape Clear (028-39159,086-3465110, capeclearferry.com).

DESIGNS ON KILKENNY

As days out go, they don’t comemuch finer than Kilkenny — from

the jewellery box of villages scat-tered throughout the county, to themosey-friendly medieval city itself.On Mother’s Day, if you buy lunchat the Kilkenny Design Centreyou’ll get free desserts with tea orcoffee. For a post-prandial, popacross to the craft centre or Kilken-ny Castle.

Details: Kilkenny Design(056-7722118; kilkennydesign.com)has main courses from 12.50.

TEA BREAK

After the noughties blingfest,home comforts and refined chic areback with a bang. And nothing sayshome comforts and refined chicbetter than afternoon tea. Daintysandwiches and pretty pastries arethe perfect way to wile away an af-ternoon in spaces like the RitzCarlton’s Sugar Loaf lounge or theWestbury Hotel’s sprawling Gallery(the latter even has a chocolate in-dulgence special).

Details: Afternoon Tea at TheRitz-Carlton Hotel in Co. Wicklow(01-2749377; ritzcarlton.com) costs36. The Westbury in Dublin(01-6791122; doylecollection.com)charges from 26.50.

MIDWEEK MUMS

If you want to go the wholehog and book your mum infor an overnight break, thebest value is undoubtedlyto be found midweek.At Kelly’s Hotel inRosslare, Co Wexford, a‘Thank You Mum’package offers bubbleson arrival, dinner atBeaches Restaurant and a

choice of facial, reflexology orfull body massage.

Details: Kelly’s Hotel(053-9132114, kellys.ie) has thismidweek package for 165pps. It isvalid midweek until April 30, ex-cluding Easter.

Spoil yourself —if no one else will!

Colette Concannon with her 2-year-old daughter Eryn at home in Ballinrobe, Co Mayo. She says her own Mum has been her‘rock through tough times’ Picture: Ray Ryan

On Mother’sDay, single

mums have agreat excuseto spend the

day doing thethings theylove best,

writes HazelGaynor

B ECOMING a motherbrings about many,many changes — most

of which are well-documented inthe multitude of books available onthe subject of pregnancy and moth-erhood; changes to our bodies,changes to our social life, changes toour relationships, changes to ourhormones. But perhaps one of thebiggest changes is that we forget tolook after ourselves.Most mums spend their days and

nights worrying about their child’swell-being; whether they’ve hadtheir five-a-day, whether their teethhave been brushed properly,whether their shoes still fit. Wenotice when our child seems moretired than usual and apply the bestcreams money can buy to their deli-cate, dry skins. All this attention onthe children leaves little time tofocus on our own well-being.And it isn’t just our physical

well-being we neglect as we scoff ajaffa cake for lunch. Many mothersalso neglect their mental and emo-tional well-being; rarely findingtime to relax, unwind or indulge insome much-needed mental TLC.Blog www.mindapples.org is an

independent organisation dedicatedto promoting mentally healthyliving for everyone. They ask thequestion, if eating five portions offruit and veg a day keeps you physi-cally healthy, what’s the equivalentfor your mind? What do you doevery day — or regularly — to takecare of yourself and keep your mindhealthy? I’m sure most mums cananswer this one fairly quickly: notmuch!Parenting mentor at Practical Par-

enting, Sheila O’Malley, agrees thatparents have to learn to parentthemselves as well as their children.“How you care for yourself willheavily influence your parenting. Astrong sense and acceptance of selfare essential to a fulfilling life and toparent well.”So, with Mother’s Day this week-

end, many mums will be lookingforward to the excuse the day pro-vides for some much-needed ‘metime’. Whether a simple breakfast inbed and a lie on is what you crave,

or spending the day relaxing at aspa, or having a special familylunch, Mother’s Day can often bejust the tonic for frazzled mums.In the UK, Asda and Mumsnetare even promoting the conceptof Mother’s Day Eve to make theoccasion last longer!But whatever your personal ex-

pectations of Mothering Sunday,for some, the day can be a lessthan exciting prospect. For moth-ers parenting alone, it can be adifficult day.Single mum Colette Concan-

non looks at Mother’s Day differ-ently now that she has sole re-sponsibility for her three-year-olddaughter. “I imagine Mother’sDay for happily married mums iscompletely different than Mother’sDay for single mums. I alwaysdreamt of being spoilt by my hus-band, breakfast in bed, not havingto do much on the day, but itdidn’t turn out like that for me.”As so often happens with these

‘Hallmark’ days, while many havereason to celebrate them, othersface a day being reminded of what

they don’t have. “My first Moth-er’s Day was horrendous,” saysColette. “I think I cried thewhole day, but I’d only been sin-gle a few months. This year, I’mplanning to enjoy the day.”Margot Doherty from Treoir

notes that, “extended families canalso be very supportive of singlemothers.” Colette’s own motherhas been a huge help. “My mumhas bought me a card for the lasttwo years and signed it from mydaughter, which was really sweet.She has been my rock through thetough times.”

Single mum Hazel Larkin, whohas two daughters aged eight andsix, also sees Mother’s Day as verydifferent for mums who are ontheir own “Generally it’s the fa-ther who instigates events; thebreakfast in bed, cards and flow-ers. Since my children have startedschool, their teachers have ledthem in the construction ofMother’s Day cards.”“I guess if Mother’s Day is im-

portant to you, then you shouldfocus on what you have — yourchildren — rather than on whatyou don’t — a partner. Celebrate

your mothering and allow yourchildren to make a fuss of you.”Hazel certainly isn’t looking to

be showered with gifts this Sun-day. “For me, the biggest gift onMother’s Day — and, indeed, ev-ery day — is motherhood itself. Ittook me 13 years to have my kidsand I know how lucky I am.”So maybe this Mothering Sun-

day, all mothers — whether aloneor with a partner — should usethe occasion as a simple reminderof three very important things:how lucky we are to have ourchildren in our lives, that we aredoing the best we can and that weneed to take better care of our-selves. As Shelia O’Malley says,“A happy parent equals a happychild.”Happy Mother’s Day.

■ For further information and details of par-enting courses visit www.practicalparent-ing.ie and www.treoir.ie■ You can also follow Colette Concannonand Hazel Larkin at their respective blogswww.funkymammy.blogspot.com andwww.ladyscribbles.wordpress.comHazel Gaynor blogs at www.hotcross-mum.blogspot.com

1. Read that book you’vehad sitting on your bed-side table for months.Reading is great for relax-ing and a welcome distrac-tion from the everyday is-sues which clutter ourminds.2. Buy yourself a bunch ofyour favourite flowers.3. Go for a walk alonewhile listening to yourfavourite music.4. If you are in a gym orlocal sports centre, spendtime not working out butrelaxing in the steamroom, jacuzzi or sauna.5. Do something you lovewith the kids — e.g. paint-ing, cooking, swimming,some spring gardening orwatch your favourite kids’movie with them.