CommunicatingAlways & Forever Ministry

Communicating• Communicating is the key to “all” relationships.

• Positive or Negative

• Loving an imperfect person

• Blame

• Shut Down and No communication

ASSERTIVEStanding up for Yourself

What is Assertive?• Assertiveness is a behavioral style of

communication in which a person expresses their thoughts, feelings, wants, and needs in a clear, direct, and honest manner while respecting the rights and needs of others.

How to be Assertive• How many times do you wish you would

have said something?

• Has your family and friends told you that you need to be more assertive?

• Tell people what you are thinking in a respectful way

Benefits of being Assertive• Assertiveness is an important skill when you are

trying to build relationships, negotiate tasks and responsibilities, or work together with other people in a variety of settings.

– Help you communicate better – Give you confidence – Help you make decisions – Increase other people’s respect for you – Help you stay true to your beliefs and goals

Tips for being Assertive• Know what outcome you want to achieve• Pick a time when you are emotionally in

control• Practice what you want to say• Look directly at the person to whom you are

speaking• Be direct and honest about your feelings,

goals, or intensions• Say no to unreasonable demands

COGNITIVE RECONSTRUCTING

Changing your Thoughts and Attitudes

What does this mean?• Being able to recognize distorted

thoughts and replace them with realistic ones.

• Learning how to think differently, to change fundamental ‘faulty thinking,’ and replace it with more rational, realistic, and perhaps positive thinking

• Results of anxiety or depression

How does it Work?• Cognitive restructuring involves paying attention to

thoughts, recognizing when they are irrational thoughts, challenging them, and learning replacement thoughts and behaviors

• Think about what is rational about this situation. Is it worth all this stress? There is nothing you can do to change where you are or how late you’ll be, no matter how much you worry. It's irrational to think about the terrible things that probably won’t happen as a result of traffic. Instead, focus your energy on how to prevent getting stuck in traffic again and avoiding future stress.

How to change• Evaluate your thoughts and fears to

determine if they are rational. – What is truly the worst possible outcome of this situation? – Could this really harm me or my family? – Am I looking at this situation correctly; what proof do I

have of my fears? – Can I really handle this situation even though I doubt

myself? – What can I do to change this situation?

• Start by writing your thoughts down on paper, and also note the facts that you know. Reevaluate the facts, compare them with your thoughts and fears, and identify what's rational.

FORGIVENESSIt’s crucial to forgive!

Importance of Forgiving• Forgive just as we are forgiven

by God• Forgive over and over again

Always & Forever Ministry

Questions or Concerns